Levi read a lot of stories. His favorites were the ones that took place in alternate universes, worlds with magic and mystic creatures and problems bigger than how the next bill would get paid. The heroes and heroines would go on adventures, solve all their problems, and for the length of the book, he would feel like he went with them. Their problems would be his and it was so easy to imagine a life where everything had a solution, where everything was exciting.
Books were a formula that had turned into a comfort for him. While the contents were all vastly different, they all followed the same pattern -- introduction, build up, climax, downfall, solution -- and, in a way, he always appreciated knowing what was coming next. The surprises could only hit him but so hard if he expected them.
Real life wasn’t like that. Real life was filled with nothing but build ups and downfalls and most of the time it never had a solution. There wasn’t always a happy ending to every blow he took to the gut and there certainly wasn’t a wise old man to navigate him through the darkest parts of the forest. Real life was lonely and difficult and while it could be magical, it usually wasn’t.
He had his band of misfits, though.
He had Ángel, and Levi saw him in every navigator in his books. He had never met anyone like him and despite being the one who lived in Redwood for his entire life, half his friends came from knowing the guy instead of finding them on his own. There was Zehra, beautiful and wild and the savior who vanished to do her own adventures, but always came back at just the right time. Emilia, the woman who could heal those with her hands, and not just physically -- she remembered things, small things, and there wasn’t a soul who wouldn’t soften beneath her touch. Grayson was the one who used his brain to get them out of disasters, the one who would see the kink in the armor and the soft spot on the dragon.
Lily, of course, was the one who slayed the dragons. She was the one who picked up the sword while everyone else hesitated -- especially Levi, who always hesitated -- and used her unassuming figure to her advantage. She was the one with the most character development, the fan favorite. The one who went from keeping her head down to holding it high and laughing in the face of danger and wearing her heart exposed in her chest.
He was never sure where his place was, if he had a job description at all. There was a big part of him that felt like he disappeared every time his mother forgot who he was. It was easy to slip into that, to become someone who just floated through life, but someone always pulled him out eventually.
If people were judged by their crew, then Levi thought he was more than okay in the end. Maybe he wasn’t the hero in this story, but he never went a day where he didn’t feel grateful to be part of it.
It was weird, but he liked the books where the heroes died the best. It was always interesting to see the approach to it, how different authors imagined it to be, though it was pretty formulaic itself. It was usually slow. They had time to say their goodbyes and get their last dramatic words in. Sometimes they got to see their life flash before their eyes, sometimes they didn’t, but they always got to feel satisfied for all they accomplished in the end, a twisted happy ending.
The quick deaths were the most painful, the ones with no closure, the ones the characters never saw coming. No last words. No reflection of their life. No moment of satisfaction.
It drove him crazy, but those were the stories that stuck with him the most, and that’s what stories were supposed to do.
At the very least and above all else, he hoped his story stuck with people.
She disregards the lack of a blanket and cocks her head with a smile. “Why thank you, kind sir,” she quips, dipping downwards to sink into the earth, her fingertips playing with the fabric of his flannel. “I wasn’t,” she shrugs, an air of disappointment forming. Zehra had always missed the simplicity of this town whenever she came and went, experiencing the world one backpack at a time. She had missed these moments with Levi. “Sometimes, I kinda regret not being around much for the events here but… I’ll change that. I want to change that, y’know. Besides, it’s now law that the two of us will be coming here for years to come. These moments would be pointless without my biggest fan.” The veil of night, the cold air, the sound of distant chatter, the concoction nursed a happiness most longed for.
(death tw, fire tw, injury tw)
“Ah, yes, the many laws of Zehra,” he laughs. He leans back, arching his back as he stretches, and sighs contently. “I was always told I was supposed to get out of here when I was a kid, but I dunno. It’s not so bad. I like feeling like I’m home all the time. You keep coming back, so I know you like it, too. I mean, traveling the world seems fun and all, but c’mon.” He lulls his head to the side and looks at her with a soft grin. “Haven’t you ever heard that home is where the heart is?”
The saying the calm before the storm never rang more true than now. The crowd is filled with murmurs of light conversation no different than he and Zehra were having and he feels at peace with everything. He wishes he was with Lily, but he knows that they both need to have clear heads before they start this, and he looks forward to seeing her tomorrow. He thinks of is mother and how she used to love the festival and he wonders if she’ll have a lucid day next year so he can bring her.
He doesn’t realize what’s happening when the fire starts. He turns, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion at the commotion happening behind them, and his eyes widened at the billowing smoke. “Shit,” he hisses as he jumps up. He yanks her up with him. “We gotta head out.”
The one thing authors never wrote about was how death filled all five senses.
When he was eleven, his dad took him on a hunting trip. The quiet of the woods was deafening and every step sent a shock wave through the trees with the crackle of dry leaves beneath their feet. After hours of nothing, a crack filled the air that made the hair on the back of his neck stand up, and the boom that followed made him jump. A tree, dead yet massive, fell in their path, and Levi’s first reaction was to cling to his dad’s legs.
You can hear death.
The same crack he heard when he was eleven snaps his head around.
You can smell and taste death.
The smoke burns his nostrils, his lungs, his throat. He picks up the shirt Zehra sat on moments before and shoves it over her face. Ash fills his mouth when he chokes out her name in a warning.
You can see death.
The top of the tree shakes first, and he sees the vibration move through the trunk like electricity.
You can feel death.
His hands grip Zehra tightly -- too tightly, he thinks through his panic, but she wasn’t in the woods with his dad when he was eleven and he doesn’t think she knows what the crack means. His feet stumble over themselves while he tries to pull them both out of the way. His ankle twists and he spins around with it in an effort to keep his balance. It doesn’t work.
Instinct is a funny thing, he thinks. He’s never been in this situation before, not even close, but he still knows to shove her away as hard as he can before he goes down. He doesn’t know if it’s enough; he hopes to God it’s enough.
He’s staring at grass and the flickering illumination from the fire disappears behind a quickly growing shadow. The shadow grows, and he’s stunned, and it grows until it engulfs him entirely.
The only thing he can think is I hope no one tells Mom.
“I’m not rushing. I’ve waited ten years for this moment. You’ll come over on Monday and we’ll talk to them. If they have a problem, I’ll move out,” Lily promised him. Things felt right again, and there was hope for her and Levi as an actual couple now. “You know, I wrote you a letter that I never sent. It was after we broke up, I said I’d always have so much love for you and no matter how we end up, I hope you lead a great life,” Lily admitted. “It just… always felt like words I’d left unsaid. I figured if we’re laying it all out on the table, I might as well come clean.” She returned his kiss, and remained in his embrace even as their lips parted. “Let’s commemorate this moment. The last photo I have of us was from 2009, with the worst camera. Plus, I finally learned how to do my eyeshadow,” she joked as she put her camera in selfie mode, smiling as she snapped a photo of her and Levi. “I’ll send it to you.”
“That’s... shit,” he breathed out a laugh, his thumbs drawing circles on her arms. “I’m sort of glad you never sent it. It would have been some closure I didn’t really want to be honest. If it’s any consolation, I've had a pretty good life so far.” He smiled slightly and ran his thumb over her cheek when they pulled away from the kiss. He moved so he was beside her, his arm around her waist, and he flashed a smile at the camera. He pulled away and looked back at her. “Yeah, please. Showing you off, remember?” he teased. He hesitated for a moment before he reached in his back pocket to bring out a paperback book. “Hey, uh, I remember you saying that you wanted to read this, so I brought it today. There’s... something inside of it, but can you wait until later to look at it? I wasn’t expecting...” He gestured between them. “...this and I dunno if I can handle standing here like an idiot. But the book is really great.”
“The heart wants what it wants,” she shrugs at the sentiment. A sense of naivety had often existed within her when it came to love, though she would cling to it until her knuckles grew white. “You just happened to be one of few who fight for it and, hell, it’s pretty great that the conclusion was what you wanted. You’re a good egg, Levi, she’s lucky to have you.” Their friendship - not littered by potential awkwardness from prior events - was enough to solidify that. His heart was as good as she’d always believed it. “Now, I’d just be offended if I was anything other than the favourite,” she leans into him as they walk, sharing equal warmth. “Wait, you were playing things cool?”
“Thanks,” he replies, still feeling sheepish. He was never good dealing with emotions, and although his happiness at the turnout was something he felt in his core, it was no different here. He laughs and knocks against her playfully. “I’m always cool,” he teases in spite of himself. When they come across a gap of people near the trees, he realizes something and frowns. “I didn’t think to bring a blanket.” He maneuvers himself so he can tug off his flannel from beneath his jacket and lays it ceremoniously on the ground, gesturing towards it grandly. “Best seats in the house,” he tells her with his lopsided grin. He sits next to it, uncaring about his jeans getting dirty. “You weren’t at last year’s, were you?” he asks. “They get more fireworks every year. I kinda think the planners are pyros.”
“Only so I can remind myself that after all this time, I’m still the better looking one in this duo.” The quip departs from her lips as she mirrors his prior actions, crumpled notes for food, allowing a brief spell of silence to sit between them as she brings the food to her lips. It’s warmth provokes a Cheshire cat grin. The moment provokes the desire to remember it. Thus, she draws her phone out as previously mentioned and pulls her companion inwards for a selfie, the By The Slice banner evident in the final image. As she stuffs the device back into the depths of her pockets, she lifts her head up in surprise. “Oh my god, what? Fucking finally. You’ve been obsessed with her for so long that I was starting to get impatient. I’m so happy for you, Levi. It’s about time this world cut you a break.”
There was always something about Zehra that drew him in. He thought he had feelings at first, but he learned over time that not all connections had to be romantic. It’s easy being with her, even with their odd history, and he’s glad she was the one relationship he didn’t annihilate trying to get away. He laughs at her reply and rubs a hand over his eyes sheepishly. “It’s weird, alright? I was feeling pathetic for being hung up on a girl I dated less than a year a decade ago. I had some internal shit to work through with that.” He puts his arm around her shoulder and leads her to the line of trees. “You can now officially take the title of my favorite ex, though, ‘cause Lil’s all in already. Fuck it, man. I’m tired of playing it cool.”
“Dude suns out guns out once summer comes. As soon as we get above 70 it’s beach time. Bout time we showed off our beach football skills.” He smiled as he thought about it. He loved summers in Redwood and over the years he and Levi had done their best to make the most out of it, with Quinn’s sunburnt ass in tow. “What you thought you were gonna have to interview? Fuck outta, here, I should have just asked you in the first place. We’ll got to the batting cages next week and get some practice in. Shake off that rust. I mean granted they’re kids but I’m trying to win a championship here, you know what I mean? Wait til you see our shits for this year,” he let out a low whistle and gave Levi’s arm another squeeze. “The ladies are gonna go crazy man. Well, they’re gonna really want you to mow their lawns now,” he told him with a wiggle of his eyebrows, laughing as he threw his arm around Levi’s shoulders. “You wanna get one of those fancy organic drinks with me?”
“I’ll try my hardest to be as competitive as you,” he laughed as he gave his friend a playful shove on the shoulder. “This is so fucking cool, man, thank you. I used to love sports. I was never the best, but, y’know. It’s not about winning or whatever. Which is something I will be reminding you of often, I’m sure.” He let out a laugh. “Dude, I love moms. I mean, trust me, not into it like that, but don’t lie, it feels nice as hell when they want you.” He rubbed his chest and shot him a wink. “I’m looking forward to the ego boost.” He rolled his eyes when Angel’s arm went over him, but he followed his lead without protest. “Organic isn’t fancy, dude. I’ve been trying to tell you that for years. You gotta work on that diet.”
If Gully had been on edge with the appearance of Levi, the feeling quickly dissipated with the laugh the other man offered, a soft smile of his own pulling his lips upward. “Yeah, of course.” A nod followed, making a mental note to mention Levi if he ran into Zehra later in the day. He couldn’t help but chuckle at the man’s comment on the flavor of the ice cream, eyeing the wallet Levi pulled out of his pocket with a shake of his head. “It’s more than your basic ice cream stand,” Gully teased, setting the bowls down to scoop out three scoops of the vanilla bean pistachio bread. “Don’t worry about it, on the house, man.”
His eyebrows raised in surprise. “Free ice cream? Damn, dude. Business must be booming today.” He accepted the bowl and took a bite, squinting as he tried to muddle through all the flavors. “You know, I thought it’d be bad, not gonna lie, but I can see why vanilla bean and pistachio bread go together now. Huh. The more you know.” He took a step back to allow another customer take his place and gave a wave. “Maybe take a break and go have fun? Being cooped in a tent while the rest of us are getting wasted to save the world doesn’t sound too fun.”
“Rather them than me,” she tacks on, stretching a single arm outwards to catch her jacket. The temperature had shifted, the air had gone cold, and her current ensemble was unfit to maintain her warmth without a second layer. “You read my mind, I could eat a damn horse.” Stuffing her arms into her jacket sleeves, Zehra pursues, casually, alongside her friend. She takes it in for the moment, the peaceful exchange of day into night. “You better entertain me with an honorary selfie with the food to mark the occasion, Foster. Good food, good wine and a great atmosphere. It’s not been the worst night of my life.”
“You’ll take a selfie with me?” Levi asks, placing a hand over his heart with a playful expression of awe. He walks with her, and the lightness in his steps doesn’t go unnoticed by him. His fingers twitch as they approach the By The Slice tent and he exchanges the cash for the paper plate of food, nudging her to get her own, covered by him. “I’m glad you’re not having the worst night of your life,” he replies with a secretive smile. As he takes a bite of his pizza, he talks around it, shrugging casually as he speaks. “I kissed Lily today. Not the worst night of my life, either.” He grins finally, breaking away from his aloof facade. “Kind of the best, actually.”
“Monday?” Lily proposed, intending to keep her word. “My parents are in Dallas this weekend, but should be back tomorrow. We can talk to them Monday afternoon if you’re not working?” She was surprised that things were moving along so easily with Levi, all they needed to do was communicate. “You can show me off now. Wait, you never met my niece, did you? I’m supposed to take care of her for a while later so my sister can get a break. I know you’re probably busy, but you can say hi to Grace if you stick around for about an hour or so. I’m guessing she’ll be part of your life for a while - I’m hoping so, at least.”
“Monday works for me,” Levi laughed, still in a state of disbelief. “I’d... Like to meet her, absolutely. Shit.” He laughed again as his hands went to her elbows and pulled her closer, his eyes searching hers for any sign of hesitance. “I don’t want you to rush into this,” he told her gently, but he kept pulling her in until her body was flush against his. He liked how small she was. He was never one to shy away from being shorter than a girl, but he couldn’t argue that he didn’t miss how much better she fit him. “I’m not going anywhere. I’ve always been here, Lil. I never left.” He kissed her again, not caring who saw.
"I can’t believe they’re getting the acapella group to sing during the fireworks,” Levi scoffed as he tossed Zehra her jacket. “We might as well just watch them while you’re on break, c’mon. Are you hungry? By The Slice is basically giving their shit away since the night is almost over.”
“Oh I know you do cause I look sexy as fuck in these pants,” he replied with a grin, opening up his arms to give Levi a big bear hug before he pulled back to strike a few poses, tipping his hat up a bit. “You? Wearing flannel? I’m shocked. Hugs your biceps just right though man.” His eyes lit up at the question and he nodded. “Hell yeah I am, why, you interested? Dude we have so much fun with the softball games you’ve been before, it’d be awesome. Shit you and me as coaches? Hell yeah you’re hired,” he replied with a wider grin, “I mean that’s what you were asking, right? Moms are a little wild though, but they also bring lots of snacks.”
“You’ve got your kicks and I’ve got my flannels,” Levi laughed as he adjusted his shirt. “My biceps would rather I just wear a t-shirt, but it’s too cold for that. Summer’s almost here though.” A slow grin spread over his lips. “Shit, that was easy. I thought I’d have to tell you my schedule and beg a little more. I haven’t played in a while, so I’m a little rusty, but I’ve, uh-- I think it’d be nice to do something I actually wanna do. I’m prepared for the moms, dude. I already mow their lawns.”
Lily had expected Levi to walk off. She expected him to say that he needed time. What she didn’t expect was for Levi to kiss her then and there. She returned it, using his shoulders for support, not caring about the onlookers.
“I’ve wanted to do that since you were sitting on my couch, making fun of people who like fruity desserts. And… I’m going to tell my parents, once the time is right. I know things aren’t definite yet and we’re still seeing where it goes, but they’ll have to live with it,” Lily promised him. “I mean, if you think you can date a woman who eats pineapple on pizza and considers fruit as a viable dessert option.”
Levi laughed against her lips and reluctantly pulled away from her. “I have... so much shit I have to tell you,” he laughed again and shook his head, a little in disbelief. “But you know me. I gotta prepare for word mouth shit. But I, uh... Yeah. If time isn’t... more than a week this time, then yeah. I never... really liked being your secret. Kinda always wanted to show you off.”
The sound of someone entering caught his attention and distracted him from the task he had been working on; carefully pulling new bowls from the crate they had been shipped in while he had a few seconds without customers to spare. The last person he had expected to ever see was Levi. At the inquiry about Zehra, his brow furrowed and he shook his head, standing in front of the man with the bowls in his hands, mid-action. “Nah, I haven’t. I gave her the night off to prepare for her performance. Is it important? Sanem should know where she is…”
“Not super important, but if she does stop by can you tell her to answer her fucking phone?” He let out a small laugh and shook his head in spite of her. He wasn’t sure if Lily or Zehra had told him about the alleged misunderstanding, but Gully didn’t strike him as confrontational, anyway. In an effort to make up for his stupidity -- a gallant one, if he said so himself -- he pulled his wallet out of his back pocket. “Give me some of that...” He squinted at the sign. “Vanilla bean.. pistachio... bread? That’s so many flavors.”
“Look at you,” Levi called, his arms out wide. “Fucking killing it, man. You’re very, very blue, and I mean that in the nicest way.” He grinned and clapped his friend on the back. “Hey, you’re looking for an assistant coach, right? I heard some moms talking about it.”
“Levi, what are we doing?” Lily asked him with a sigh. “I’m not pretending anymore - I want to pursue something again with you,” Lily told him honestly, heart almost beating out of her chest. “I still have feelings for you, and I acknowledge that you may not feel the same way - and that’s fine. We can either be friends still, or go our own ways. I just… needed to tell you.” Lily looked down, trying to breathe evenly. “Please say something,” she pleaded, almost begging him. She may be hurt after, but at least she’d know where she stood.
He stopped breathing at her words. He shouldn’t have been surprised -- Lily was always like that, always taking charge, always putting her foot down and commanding the world to bend to her will -- but he was still caught off guard. He blinked as his mind raced. This wasn’t how he wanted to do things, not really, but he’d just have to learn how to dance to Lily’s tune again.
“We were never friends, Lil,” he finally replied. He let that linger for a moment before he stepped closer, carefully placing his hands on her face. “So we can’t do that, can we?”
Levi poked his head inside of the Ice Box tent and scanned it quickly. His pleasant expression faltered for a minute when he saw Gully. Knowing it was too late to back out without looking like a lunatic, he stepped inside and nodded while he looked around. “Gotta be honest, man, didn’t really see a fancy ice cream place taking off. Good for you.” He paused before he rubbed the back of his neck. “Have you seen Zehra? I’m supposed to give her something and she’s all over the place. Like usual.”
Lily looked up from her phone when she saw a familiar face approach her. “Levi, hi,” she greeted warmly in reply. “That is indeed a weird question, but I’ll accept it. Sucks for your friend, because wine and the sun are my favorite things, along with pizza. His loss, my gain,” she stated as she accepted one of the plates. “It’s… enjoyable, although I find myself going into planner mode sometimes and then reminding myself that I’m not in charge here. I was actually just about to hit up the food stalls, but you saved me a trip there. Have you sampled anything else today?” she asked, taking a bite of the pizza. “Your friend has good taste, ordering pineapple on their pizza. Tell him I’m a fan,” she joked.
“Yeah? What ways would you make this better?” he asked with a lopsided smile. His fingers lingered on hers when she took the pizza before he turned away to take a bite of his own. He laughed at a joke he wasn’t sure he was ready to let her in on just yet. “Yeah, you and him are the only people who like that stuff. I’ll never understand it.”
