❁

requests open [ d&p ]

[phlesbian]

a giggly boy

[champzagne]

harrys so cute i want 7

[alienaelizabeth]

[can-u-not-my-wayward-son-deacti]

its funny cause the hp fandom hijacked a post that was about harry styles

[mirror]

Slow clap for the HP fandom

[jimmyneuteredtron]

[qanhowell]

remember when dan was gettin riled up about that man who was rude to phil during a flight and he said ‘clam down’ instead of ‘calm down’. like what kind of weird ass robot typo shit was that

[today-ifuckedup]

Today, I fucked up... by looking at my aunts baby

So ill get right to it, today my aunty came over to show us her new baby. It’s name’s Cooper, so long story short my auntie came over with Cooper in his stroller. This should have been an easy task right, look at the baby and say some cheesy comment like “aww, he’s so cute” but, there was a big ass bug on the stroller handle, and the first thing that came out of my mouth was “Ew, what the fuck is that?” I mean, I was talking about the stupid bug but my auntie has never looked so disgusted.

[skygenders]

Best Tumblr Responses 

[literallyaflame]

if u ever feel clumsy just remember:

last night i catapulted my plastic water bottle across the room with my elbow and it cracked and spewed water into an electrical outlet

i have a scar on the back of my hand that i got while trying to put my hair in a ponytail a few years ago. (i fucked up and also i broke the hairtie.)

i literally caught my arm hair on fire once haha that was fun

the other day i was trying to open a container of frozen yogurt and i sliced my finger open. blood everywhere. the yogurt wasn’t even that great

i had just got done acting in a play and they were doing roll call or whatever and i tripped. in front of the entire school. i was the main character and i came out last and i fucking tripped

[phan001]

you’re such an inspiration

[literallyaflame]

thank u i do try

[literallyaflame]

i just realized i didn’t mention the one time i tripped and fell into a smoldering fire pit and had to go to the hospital. truly one of the most iconic moments of my childhood

[peepeepoopoobloopblop]

Is that why your username is literallyaflame?

[archive95205-blog]

today at work i let someone into a dressing room and they said “thanks” and half of me tried to say “you’re welcome” and the other half tried to say “no problem” and i ended up saying “your problem”

[lemonbraid-deactivated20130415]

[missmephisto]

this post had me in tears

[ghost-plot]

I was hoping the notes would be full of similar stories, but they’re not, so I’ll add my story for anyone else looking for more laughs:

I had to go to a library to pay a fee and I was practicing in the car between “I have to pay a fine” and “I have to pay a fee” and I walked in and firmly stated “I have to pee” and slapped a five dollar bill on the counter (the fee was like ten cents), and walked out. This was like three years ago and I still haven’t been back,

[greatestgoth]

My friend was driving and we were almost past our turnoff so I tried to say “quick” and “fast” at the same time and I ended up screaming “QUACK” which ended up with him judging me very hard and missing the turn

[soldieronbarnes]

Recently someone in class asked me how I was doing and I started off saying I was good but switched to I’m okay in the middle and ended up saying “I’m gay.”

Which, while kind of accurate, was not what I meant to announce to my classmate.

[spankyhole]

This Halloween I was handing out candy and a child said “trick or treat” and I smiled gave them their candy and apparently my mouth betrayed me and I said “Merry Christmas” and proceeded to sit down and look up to the sky for answers while their mother laughed at me :)))))

[succlentwitch]

I was switching between “Bye Deanna” and “Goodbye” and I ended up saying “Go Die”

[stellaathena]

Sometimes I try to say “I fucking love you” but it comes out in the wrong order and then everyone’s uncomfortable.

[magebird-old]

When I first started my coffee shop job, I was still getting used to greeting customers as they came in the door. A man walked in, and in the jumble of trying to say, “How are you doing?” and “What’s up?” I ended up demanding “What are you doing here?!”

[ledamemangociana]

something really cool happened once at the office and i started to say “i’m so amazed” but halfway through my mind changed to “that’s really amazing” and i just ended up saying “i’m really so amazing”

[umbrellabonsai-deactivated20180]

one time i was out in the woods in the spring when the birds were just beginning to come out again and i went to say “i’m so pumped for the birds” and “i’m so hyped for the birds” and instead i said “i’m so humped for birds”

[muraqiba]

Once I was walking to school and there was a guy walking his dog and the dog came to me and started sniffing me and I was in such a good mood and when I passed by his owner I wanted to say like “hello” or “good morning” or “cute dog” or something like that and I ended up looking up at him, smiling real big, and saying “thank you”. 

[thegenderfluiddruid]

I was at the convenience store and I was going to buy a drink, but i dropped my keys and the drink when I got to the register so I got caught between “my drink!” and “my keys” and ended up screaming “MY KINK.”

[meme-of-lord-deactivated2016102]

I walked up to this register,in a target. When the cashier finished checking me out she said have a good day, and i wanted to say “You have a good day” and “You too” so it came out “You have a good do do”

[queenvalerie-replies-deactivate]

I FUCKIN H HIT MY HEAD ON A CHAIR FROM LAUGHING TOO HARD AT THIS FUCKING POS T

[honeybee-bi]

There’s so many new stories on this since the last time I saw it and fuck I am laughing so hard I think I’m annoying my roommate

[unicornempire]

These are too damn good to pass up reading!

[dr-i-have-beards]

Four years ago: in class, I meant to say “in-text citations” but thought “works cited” and also messed up the order of words all at once. I said “sex work in cites” and that was the end of class that day.

[imaginarycircus]

My college is tiny and my class was small enough that all the professors do a receiving line and shake the hands of all the graduates after the ceremony. They were all saying, “Congratulations.” And I was super flustered and realized about a third of the way down the line that I was saying, “Congratulations” back to each professor. So then I said, “You’re welcome.” And then I just made mumbly sounds and waited for it to be over. 

[queenusagiblog]

🛑

@danielhowell

ART | YOUTUBE | RB

[glittergradient]

dan still asking phil for those tips

bonus update 2018:

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaiiii-deactivated2]

Phil and 31 styles of 2017s videos of “@amazingphil”

HAPPY BIRTHDAY PHIL ∩(︶▽︶)∩ ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)

[theanomex]

[blasphannie]

remember that time dan said “phil got demanding”, then looked at the camera and wiggled his eyebrows and then licked his lips during a liveshow?

because i don’t. i’ve repressed it so i could live a healthy life.

[gmmtheev]

happy world nutella day!

[fka-miasparkle]

I met Dan and Phil last night, and they were the nicest ever!!! I felt guilty about how nice they are, because no one should ever be that nice! I had to walk over to the table they were eating at and omg the moment Dan looked up was literally the scariest second of my life. Phil offered the photo to ME! HE 2 ME! I didn’t even bring it up. I’m 23 and I feel 16 again. I cannot fuckinnngggg deal

[swearphil]

phil lester + air quotes

bonus:

[speckledspout]

Give Me Someone to Hold Onto

Supernatural One Shot

Dean X Reader

Warnings: Fluff-ish (I guess), Depression

Word Count: 920

A/N: I’m in a downward spiral right now that’s been a long time coming really and I can’t stop falling and I don’t know what brought it on and all I needed was someone to hold onto and well…Dean seems to always be there for Sam and just this once I needed him here for me so this came from it. Just Dean being there when you need him the most because he knows.

You hadn’t moved. Hadn’t wanted to. Hell, didn’t even have the energy too. Just the thought of having to get up and be social, hold a conversation with someone, plaster yet another fake smile on your face just to get by made you want to sink further into the blankets and disappear.

You weren’t sure what time it was. Just reaching across the bed to check your phone seemed to require too much effort. And you hated when you got like this. When you felt like the whole world was against you before you even woke up fully. And there was no reason for it either. It wasn’t like you had received news that made your stomach twist in ways that you didn’t want to feel.

There were just days that you couldn’t move because everything was against you.

Most of the time, you would just play it off. When the brothers would ask what took you so long getting up because you were normally an early riser, you just smiled and told them that you wanted to sleep in just a little later. There wasn’t a crime in that.

Keep reading

[letswinchesters]

Title: Told you so

Request: Hi can you do an imagine where the reader is the boys’ younger sister (like 17) and her and Dean’s girlfriend always fight. She tries telling Dean that she is evil but he doesn’t believe her which causes a fight. And then it turns out the girlfriend really is evil (like a demon or something) and takes the reader and hurts her and Sam and Dean has to save her and stuff.

A/N; Okay, so i think I understood your request with how you wanted everything and the fighting. Dean’s girlfriend’s name is going to be Stacy.

You woke up to the view of yet another ugly motel room you had to share with your brothers. As much as you tried convincing them to let you get your own room (I mean you’re a teenager girl, you need some privacy!) they still wouldn’t let you.

“Morning,” Sam greeted, sitting at the small, round, kitchen table with his laptop open. He passed you a cup of coffee and you sat down across from him, taking a sip sip gratefully. 

“Where’s Dean?” You asked. 

“Stacy dropped my early this morning,” Sam coughed, refusing to meet your gaze. He knew how much you hated Dean’s new love interest. You always told him she was no good for Dean and that she was hiding something. As much as Sam wanted to believe you, just like Dean, he didnt. He didnt see what you saw and assumed it was just your protective little sister mode kicking into gear. Just like your brothers were over protective about your love life, you were concerned with theirs. “They went to breakfast. She said she was here for a case nearby.”

You laughed, “Sam, she’s not even a hunter! She’s trained for like two months and suddenly put herself out there. She sucks!”

“Well Dean doesn’t, so he’ll just have to keep an eye on her thats all,” Sam was always one to encourage his siblings when it came to letting their inner feelings out for someone they liked. More so his brother–but he still wanted Y/N to be happy with a boy someday. 

“She’s only put Dean in danger.” You stated. 

“We’re back,” Dean walked through the door with a a six pack in one hand. Stacy was behind him in tight skinny beans and crop top that showed her new belly ring. “What’s up sleeping beauty?” Dean nodded towards you. 

You rolled your eyes, “And look what the cat dragged in,” You said quietly and took another sip of your coffee. 

Dean huffed in annoyance and Stacy rolled her eyes not even saying anything back to you. When neither of your brothers were looking she made a gun with her index finger, middle finger, and thumb, and fired a pretend bullet at you. You reached out and “caught” the invisible bullet and “placed” it in your pocket sarcastically with a sarcastic smile. 

“I’m going to go back to my room and take a shower,” She announced and hopped on her tippy toes, leaning over and pulling your oldest brother in for a long kiss. You gagged in your seat and Sam looked at his laptop with a cringe. “Feel free to join me,” She winked at him and left. 

The second the door slammed shut, Dean turned to you with a glare ceasing his eyes. You rolled your eyes, preparing for the fight you weren’t going to pack down on. Stacy has been such a bitch to you ever since she had come into your life. And not only that, but you have heard her speak to herself in Latin that sounded like a spell. Every time you tired to get closer to see what she was doing, she must have sensed you and stopped.

You tried telling your brothers what you saw, but they figured you made it up just so Dean would get rid of her. Dean thought you were jealous that he was focusing more on Stacy than he was with you. But that wasn’t the case at all, but he refused to see it any other way. 

“You can’t even be nice to her for once?! One time, Y/N! You haven’t said one nice thing to her since I picked her up!” Dean yelled at you. The veins in his neck were becoming more prominent, and his lips turned upside down into a frown. 

“Dean, she’s not your sweetheart that you think she is,” you tried explaining for the millionth time. “She’s rude, self-centered and is keeping secrets! I know she is!”

“We’re all keeping secrets! We all have secrets it’s called being human!”

“Come on Dean, don’t you find it strange that she randomly approached you when we were on a job dressed as FBI agents? It’s not like you picked her up at some random bar.”

“So? Im approachable.”

“y/n–” Sam tried stopping you before things escalated too far. You were a lot like Dean. You refused to back down from a fight until it got too vicious and then you were screwed. 

“Shut up, Sam” You said, “Dean, she is not trustworthy! How can you believe her over your own sister!”

“Because my sister is wrong!”

“You’re just like dad,” you sneered. You knew that was a low blow but you were too in the moment to care, “You’re putting some stranger before your own family.”

“Get out,” Dean said lowly and threateningly. 

“What?” You breathed out, your eyes growing a little as you saw his face. He meant what he said and he was not backing down. 

“Dean–” Sam tried again only to be shushed by the oldest. 

“Get out,” Dean said one more time. 

You bit you lip, nodding your head in anger. You dint spare him one look as you grabbed your phone from the nightstand and stormed out of the room. You didnt even care that you were in sweatpants and a tank top. 

You walked out of the motel lobby into the brisk, cold air. You mentally cursed yourself out for not grabbing a jacket. You walked foreword ready to find somewhere else you could stay, but you were hit in the back of your head with something. And everything was black. 

+ + +

When you woke up you were tied to a metal pole that stuck out from the floor and reached all the way to the ceiling, You looked around and noticed you were in some abandoned factory. How cliche. You tried pulling on your restraints but it was no use. The back of your head was sticky which you assumed was the blood caused when some douche shit hit you in the back of the head.

“Hey, princess,” Stacy stepped into view. her long red hair flowed down to her chest and she looked pleasant as she watched you struggle in your spot. 

“Should have figured it was you,” you said looking around once again, “You always were so uncreative.”

“Just like Dean,” She laughed. The thought of Dean made your heart hurt., “You two put on these hard faces so people can’t tell how you’re actually feeling. But here’s the thing. I’m different, I can see right through you." 

She blinked and her eyes turned into the familiar black holes, every demon has. "I shouldn’t be surprised, I always knew you were sent from hell.”

“I know you have,” She said, “And that is why I need to get rid of you. Sooner or later Dean is going to realize you have been telling him the truth about me and he’ll kill me. But Hell needs him Y/N. You can’t get in the way of our plans.”

“You won’t have the chance,” I snarled, “Even if you kill me, Sam won’t let you hurt Dean. Not even on your birthday, sweetheart.”

“I’ve got Sam taken care of,” She shook her head and punched you hard across the face. She knelt down so she was eye level, “Now, lets have some fun shall we?”

DEAN’S POV:

“Sam! She’s not here!” Sam and I have been driving all around trying to find our little sister that I stupidly had leave just cause I was mad. If anyone should have left it should have been me. 

First, we walked to Stacy’s room to see if she had found her. That’s when we walked in to an empty room and found traces of sulfur and spell books. On her table was a silver bowl filled with blood. Thats when I knew Y/N was telling the truth. 

“Her GPS!” Sam screamed as the thought entered his mind, “Why did I think of that!” He took out his phone and instantly pulled out her number and typed away. 

I waited anxiously in the drivers seat, speeding down some unknown road, and bumping my leg up and down in anticipation. 

“Painters Factory on 23rd,” Sam said. I knew exactly where that was. I saw Stacy eyeing it down today as if it meant something to her. 

I stepped on the gas, “hang in there, Y/N” I whispered and zoomed down the road. 

Y/N’S POV:

“You wont get away with this,” i spit out the blood from my mouth. I felt the warm liquid of my blood spill down my face from where I had been repeatedly punched, scratched, cut, etc. She even stabbed me in the thigh with a small dagger. The dagger was still in my leg, and i think she broke a rib or two. 

She clicked up the safety of the her newly loaded gun and pointed it at me.“Not when I frame someone else. It could have been a pervert who had done this to you.”

“It was,” i glared and she bit back whatever comment she was going to say. “You think I care about dying? Pull the trigger! I don’t care anymore! My life doesn’t mean shit.”

“You’re right,” She nodded. 

A bullet to her back made her freeze and turned around to see who it was. Sam and Dean stood at the entrance way. Both with guns drawn. 

“Ow Dean that hurt,” She said in a monotone voice and looked down at her shirt that now had a hole in it. 

“What the fuck Stacy!” Dean demanded and looked at me with concerned eyes. I tried to breathe normally. 

“Let her go, Stacy. It’s over” Sam said. 

Stacy smirked and flung Sam to the side with the flick of her wrist. Had to see that one coming. “Dean, she is getting in the way of hell’s plans for you. I’m doing my orders.”

“And I’m doing mine,” Dean quickly removed his angel knife from the inside of his jacket pocket and stabbed her in the stomach. She shined before dropping dead to the floor. 

Dean knelt by me and started untying me. He had tears in his eyes as he looked over my wounds. “I’m so sorry. I should have believed you. I’m sorry for telling you to leave. This is my fault–”

“Dean, no chick flick moments,” I shook my head and tried smiling but I was in too much pain. He let out the littlest laugh.

Sam walked over to us and dusted himself off, “You okay?”

“Been better,” I said smugly.

“This is going to hurt,” Dean shrugged his jacket off and took off his flannel. He motioned to the dagger sticking out of my leg. Before I could protest, he yanked it out and I screamed what I could before Sam muffled my screams with his hands. Dean tied the flannel around my thigh and began picking me up. 

“Careful. Ribs” I coughed.

“I’m so sorry,” Dean apologized once again.

“Hey, Dean?”

“Yeah?” he looked down at me.

“I told you so,”

“He grinned and shook his head, "Yeah you told me so, little sister. You told me so…”