Supernova

Link Murphy. Residential disaster squad member & storm trooper residing in 6D. Yes I have a girlfriend and a boyfriend, what the fuck about it? {RP Blog thnx}

[linkmurphy]

I Can’t Not Love You - A playlist for Link and Lex

Do You Want Me (Dead?) - All Time Low || Strange Love - Halsey || St. Patrick - Pvris || Sooner Or Later - Breaking Benjamin || Your Guardian Angel - Red Jumpsuit Apparatus || All Night - EndeverafteR || Wrap Me Up - Terrible Things || The Story Left Untold - Every Avenue || The Harold Song (Deconstructed) - Ke$ha || Dig With Me - Allie Moss || How You Get The Girl - Taylor Swift || You Never Give Up - William Beckett || A Little Perspective Never Hurt Anybody - Cute Is What We Aim For || Crazy Stupid Love - Jimmie Deegan || Skin+Bones - Lydia || Leaving What You Wanted - Amber Pacific || I’m Yours Tonight - The Academy Is... || I Can’t Not Love You - Every Avenue

listen here

[lexishootingforthemoon]

The Lost and Found

[linkmurphy]

“Lex,”  there was a slight tinge of anger in the words.  “I don’t know.  I really don’t want to talk about this right now.  I get that you like to have everything laid out on the table but I just…”  He stroked her hair softly.  “I really can’t get into this right now.  I’m already mentally exhausted from talking this much about my feelings.  Please.  Just…”  He exhaled slowly.  “Please not today.”

[lexishootingforthemoon]

“Okay.” She said, nodding into his chest. “I just need things to make sense and right now they dont, at all, and I just want to know where you stand and what you think. But it can wait I guess.” She swallowed hard, feeling like holding him was the only thing keeping her grounded in reality. “So.” She almost laughed. “How bad was Caitlin?”

[linkmurphy]

“I know you do.  Please understand this is really hard for me though.”  He gripped her a little tighter, laughing. “God.  What a fucking shit storm.  I was pretty sure she was going to kill me.  She was ranting and raving and it was just fucking awful.  As if I needed any more reason to be upset,”

[lexishootingforthemoon]

The Lost and Found

[lexishootingforthemoon]

Alexis nearly fell out of her chair as she was pulled into the hug. “I love you.” She said, burrying her head in his neck. “Please stop giving up on us.” She said, her tone pleading and desperate. “Thank you. We can get an apartment outside of LA or something. But I just…can’t go back. My parents would make me go back to Caitlin, and I just…I can’t live in that building. I can’t…I don’t want to see him.” Her voice was very small, trying to mask a resentment that she almost couldn’t control.

[linkmurphy]

“I love you too”  he murmured, kissing the top of her head.  “I never gave up on us, Alexis.  I just…”  He paused.  “Self destruct.  It’s not that I don’t have faith in us.  I promise.”  He nodded.  “That’s fine, baby.  Whatever you want.  Your wish is my command.  You deserve that.”

[lexishootingforthemoon]

“Do you think it was a mistake from the beginning?” She asked, swallowing hard. It was hard to talk about but she needed to know where he stood. “Like…where do you think it all went wrong?” She kept her head rested on his shoulder as she spoke, trying hard to keep her voice steady. “I’m sorry. I know it’s probably hard for you to talk about I just….I need to know where the mistakes were. I need it to make sense.”

[linkmurphy]

“Lex,”  there was a slight tinge of anger in the words.  “I don’t know.  I really don’t want to talk about this right now.  I get that you like to have everything laid out on the table but I just...”  He stroked her hair softly.  “I really can’t get into this right now.  I’m already mentally exhausted from talking this much about my feelings.  Please.  Just...”  He exhaled slowly.  “Please not today.”

[lexishootingforthemoon]

The Lost and Found

[lexishootingforthemoon]

Alexis nearly fell out of her chair as she was pulled into the hug. “I love you.” She said, burrying her head in his neck. “Please stop giving up on us.” She said, her tone pleading and desperate. “Thank you. We can get an apartment outside of LA or something. But I just…can’t go back. My parents would make me go back to Caitlin, and I just…I can’t live in that building. I can’t…I don’t want to see him.” Her voice was very small, trying to mask a resentment that she almost couldn’t control.

[linkmurphy]

“I love you too”  he murmured, kissing the top of her head.  “I never gave up on us, Alexis.  I just...”  He paused.  “Self destruct.  It’s not that I don’t have faith in us.  I promise.”  He nodded.  “That’s fine, baby.  Whatever you want.  Your wish is my command.  You deserve that.”

[lexishootingforthemoon]

The Lost and Found

[lexishootingforthemoon]

Alexis sighed. “A little. But I’ve fucked you up in my own ways I guess. This thing with c–” she couldn’t even bring herself to say his name and she swallowed it down hard. “This thing with him was just too much. It was too much to cope with. But the scariest thing about everything is that I’ll probably give you this chance and 500 more no matter what because I don’t know how not to. I love you and that’s so deeply ingrained in who I am at this point that coping without you has been…” She trailed off looking away. “Hard.” She shrugged. “I can’t…I don’t want to come back to New York. I don’t care if I stay here. I’ll go anywhere in the world, but I can’t be there.”

[linkmurphy]

Link stood up again, crossing to her finally and pulling her into a hug, clutching her like a lifeline.  “I know.  You could do anything to me and I’d take you back in a heartbeat.  It doesn’t matter.  I’m tethered to you.  The universe wants us to be together, there’s no point in fighting it.”  He wrinkled his nose a little.  “I wouldn’t mind staying in California.  Just... god not here”

[lexishootingforthemoon]

The Lost and Found

[lexishootingforthemoon]

Alexis listened to him carefully, eyes moving to his face as he started to move more towards her. “I do. Believe in that stuff.” She said softly. “Written in the stars or whatever.” She swallowed hard. “Link I never wanted to end things. You made that choice. So if you’re here to ask me to take you back then of course I will. But god damn it, if you don’t stop breaking my heart Lincoln Murphy because I don’t know how much more it can handle…” She swallowed hard, her necklace felt like fire burning into her skin under her shirt. “I don’t want to lie to you to protect your feelings right now Link, but I’m afraid of you. I used to trust you so much that you’d never ever hurt me, and now you have. Twice. Three times if you want to include–” she stopped. “Twice. But I love you. I love you more than anything. So if your asking then yeah, I’m saying yes.”

[linkmurphy]

Link felt like he had gotten smacked in the face, and right now he deserved it.  He bit his lower lip, looking at the ground again.  “God.  I really fucked you up, didn’t I?”  He murmured, slowly looking at her.  “You were perfect before I got to you.  I still think you’re perfect, but now I touched you and you’re just...” He let out a small laugh.  “Scared of me.”  That was honestly the last thing he had expected.  “I don’t know why you ever thought I wouldn’t.  That’s what we talked about the, god, second?  Third?  Time we hung out.  That we were just gonna fuck each other up.”  He fell back onto her bed.  “I’m so sorry.  I love you so much and I feel like all I do is.”  He paused, shaking his head.  “Whatever.  This isn’t about me.  IT’s about you.”  He sad up again, looking at her.  “I just want this one last chance.  Because I’m a fucking mess without you,”

[lexishootingforthemoon]

The Lost and Found

[lexishootingforthemoon]

Alexis sighed. “I’m too tired to be angry. I did about a month of anger. Broke a bunch of stuff. Then I did a lot of sad and didn’t come out of this room much. But I’m trying….I’m trying to stay alive. I’m trying to keep breathing every morning and letting myself feel overpowering emotions wasn’t helping. ” she took a deep breath. “Plus I’m a little in shock about finding you here.” Silence hung between them for a minute before finally she said “I’m your what, link? What is this? You show up in my room on the opposite side of the country, why? What do you want? Is this you just checking in? Or are you here because you want to get back together? Or did you just feel like you needed to apologize for hurting me again? Come on link what are we even doing right now?”

[linkmurphy]

Link took a hesitant step towards her.  “Well, I’m a pretty persistent asshole.  Thought I figured you’d know that by now.”  He smirked a little at her.  “I...”  He took a deep breath, uncrossing his arms and shoving his hands in his pockets - he felt more vulnerable than he ever liked to.  “I guess, yeah.  I thought maybe, if I was alone, things would make sense.  And they did.  I don’t... want to be without you.  We have matching tattoos.  You’re one of the few constants in my life.  I...”  He swallowed hard.  “I love you, Alexis.  You’re actually a part of my heart now, I’m pretty sure, and I feel fucking awful when I’m not around you.  I know I keep fucking up.  I know this is all my fault.  I just... We keep coming back together.  Even after we hurt each other, all we want is the other because we know that the apology is sincere.  I think...”  He licked his lips nervously, looking everywhere but at her.  “I guess, if you believe in that kind of thing.  We’re probably soulmates.”  He immediately deflated after saying the word, clearly intending to keep it in forever, but she needed to know exactly how he felt, as terrifying as that was.  “And I don’t.  Believe that kind of stuff.  Usually.”  He licked his lips again, running his hand through his hair.  “But then we started this fluxing in and out of each others lives and I think... You are.  My soulmate.”

[lexishootingforthemoon]

The Lost and Found

[lexishootingforthemoon]

Alexis sighed. “What did you expect then Link?” She ran a hand through her hair in frustration. “Did you expect me to be thrilled? To tell you I love you and kiss you and beg you to say you love me too?” Her tone wasnt angry. It was desperate. “I would like nothing more in the world than to do all of those things. Of course I want all of that. But just how desperate can I make myself look? You left me. If you don’t want to be with me I can’t keep falling at your feet and begging you to.” She put her head in her hands trying to keep herself calm. More than anything she wanted to be sure her voice remained soft. “What do I think?” She raised her head up just a tiny bit. “I think that I’m so lost I don’t know anything.”

[linkmurphy]

Link crossed his arms, looking down at his feet.  “No.  I expected more of something.  Anything.  More anger.  Not apathy.  I didn’t come here to see how desperate you had become.  If anyone should be begging, it’s me.”  He hadn’t moved at all, but still looked like he wanted to go to her.  “I thought if I was alone for a while I could figure everything out.  But it’s always you that my mind comes back to, Lex.  It’s always been you.  You’re my-” he paused, swallowing the word.  “You’re the only think that makes sense anymore,”

[lexishootingforthemoon]

The Lost and Found

[lexishootingforthemoon]

“You said that already” she said softly. “I’m not hurting myself.” She was confused by that. She had never been the type to physically harm herself. “That was stupid.” She said referring to her sister. “I’d put twenty bucks down that she kicked your ass and kicked you out.” She leaned back in her chair, letting her body relax. “Are you…” She trailed off, pressing her lips together. Okay was a bad word. “Are you clean?”

[linkmurphy]

“I know.”  He finally looked up at her, eyes sad.  “That’s why I was worried though.  Because you wouldn’t.  And I just started having all these thoughts and panicking and I just… Needed to see you.”  His entire body tensed up at her question - he knew it was coming, but still hated that she asked.  “Yes, Alexis.”

[lexishootingforthemoon]

Alexis nodded as he spoke. She understood. If he had disappeared without a word she probably would have gone mad with concern. She looked away just as he looked at her, scared to make eye contact with him. She was determined that no matter what happened, she wasn’t going to cry right now, and eye contact wouldn’t help that. “Okay. So now what?”

[linkmurphy]

Link pursed his lips.  This wasn’t what he was expecting.  He wasn’t really expecting her to fall into his arms, but he wasn’t expecting this either.  “I don’t know.  You’re not really reacting how I figured you would.  I guess that’s my fault though.  I can only break your heart so many times.”   He sighed, slowly picking himself up off her bed, looking unsure if he wanted to cross to her or leave the room.  “I don’t know what happens now.  What do you think?”

[lexishootingforthemoon]

The Lost and Found

[lexishootingforthemoon]

“You said that already” she said softly. “I’m not hurting myself.” She was confused by that. She had never been the type to physically harm herself. “That was stupid.” She said referring to her sister. “I’d put twenty bucks down that she kicked your ass and kicked you out.” She leaned back in her chair, letting her body relax. “Are you…” She trailed off, pressing her lips together. Okay was a bad word. “Are you clean?”

[linkmurphy]

“I know.”  He finally looked up at her, eyes sad.  “That’s why I was worried though.  Because you wouldn’t.  And I just started having all these thoughts and panicking and I just... Needed to see you.”  His entire body tensed up at her question - he knew it was coming, but still hated that she asked.  “Yes, Alexis.”

[lexishootingforthemoon]

The Lost and Found

[lexishootingforthemoon]

Alexis rolled her eyes at his feeble attempt to joke. He had missed her. The words meant more to her than she wanted to let on. “I missed you as well link.” She sighed and sat gown in her desk chair. She raised an eyebrow at him. “Did you seriously just say you wanted to make sure that I was okay?” Her words weren’t angry. They were soft, If a little bit exasperated. “I’m not. Not really. I breathe and I take one day at a time but I wouldn’t really call anything about my life ‘okay’ right now.” She wanted to be honest. At this point she didn’t see how the truth could make anything worse. “How did you get past my guard party anyways? I don’t imagine Caitlin helped you. Or that my parents were warm and welcoming.”

[linkmurphy]

“Well, okay,”  Link sighed, drawing his legs up underneath him.  “Not like.  Okay.  Just like.” he exhaled, flustered.  “Like.  That you weren’t.  Hurting yourself or anything.  You wouldn’t answer your phone.”  He was like a broken record.  “Guard party?”  Link laughed.  “Honestly I’ve been here for a week.  I’ve been coming here every day and arguing with them until I think I wore them down.”  He still wouldn’t look at her, though he desperately wanted to.  “I did try Cate first.  That... did not go well.”  He winced just thinking about it.  The girl had hurled a frying pan at him, and it had hurt.  “I just figured, if after a week and a half, if they didn’t agree, I’d just break in.”

[lexishootingforthemoon]

The Lost and Found

[lexishootingforthemoon]

Alexis found herself struggling to breathe evenly. Or breathe at all. After everything that had happened she had not been expecting him to chase her all the way out to California. And truth be told, she was shocked her parents had let him anywhere near the house. She stared at him for a minute trying to form intelligible words. Seeing him sitting here like this was heart stopping on its own.

“I didn’t know what I’d say.” She said, stepping further into the room and pulling her helmet off to set on the desk. She didn’t make eye contact with him, scared that if she did….well she wasn’t sure exactly what she was scared of finding in his face. But she was. “What are you doing here Lincoln?” She asked, her voice a feeble attempt at coldness.

[linkmurphy]

Link let out an annoyed noise, but watched her quietly.  “You always have so much to say; that’s hard to imagine,” He tease softly, but shifted a little, considering how to answer her question.  “Well.  I missed you.”  It wasn’t really that simple, on the one hand, but on the other hand, it really was.  “You weren’t answering your phone.” he repeated, looking at his hands.  “I wanted to make sure you were okay.”

[lexishootingforthemoon]

The Lost and Found

It had been months since everything in Alexis’s life had exploded. Months since the two boys she loved more than anything in the world had slowly falled out of her life. But it hadnt been slow really at all. It had been an explosion. It was the worst break up of her life because it was so full of love and desperation that calling it the end felt like killing something beautiful. But they had. All three of them had gone their seperate ways, accepting that their polyamorus relationship wasnt working for any of them. 

By now Caleb and Link had probably gotten back together without her. She wouldnt know. Shortly after it all happened, she took of back to California and hadnt spoken to either of them since. Link called a lot. Her cell phone, even months later, was consistently blowing up but she didnt answer. She couldnt. Trying to live life post Link and Caleb involved not talking to them. Otherwise shed never move on.

Today, she was distracting herself with the horses. She’d been out there all day, working with them and training. By the time she pushed the door of her California bedroom open, she was exhausted. She almost didnt notice the familiar frame sitting awkwardly on her bed. But when she did, she froze, her throat closing automatically. “Hi.” Was all she could force out.

[linkmurphy]

Link wasn’t really sure who he was as a person, and what he wanted or needed.  Breaking up with Caleb and Lexi - again - was hard enough, but he had to move and figure things out without them being around as distractions.  He still couldn’t help but call Lexi constantly just to hear her voice chirp back at him from the tinny voicemail recording.  He had moved out of Sixth and found a sub-par one bedroom apartment away from everything so he could just... think.  And figure out what he needed.

And his mind kept traveling back to Lexi.

She wouldn’t return his calls.  So, after much deliberation and selling some things on craigslist, he flew out to California, because he knew Alexis like the back of his hand and knew that she would go home.  He was forced to face her parents - for about a week, begging and pleading and promising anything and everything under the sun just to get them to let him see her - and finally they agreed.  She was out with the horses, so Link just sat on her bed and waited.  He couldn’t help but snort at her reply.

“Yeah.  Hi, Lex.”  His tone was soft, almost hesitant.  He wanted to be bitter, be angry, be anything other than what he was feeling right now.  But he couldn’t.  “You weren’t answering my calls.”

[kingsleyoftheworld-blog]

Don’t Ask... Don’t Tell || Maxwell and Link

[kingsleyoftheworld-blog]

linkmurphy:

Link pouted a little, but stopped squirming so much, realizing that Max didn’t plan on stopping anytime soon.  “You’re a jerk.”  he sulked, nipping at his jaw.

Maxwell pulled away looking at the other male, “ouch. So harsh with those words of yours Link.” He let out a chuckle and moved back remaining close, he liked being this close to Link.

[linkmurphy]

“I know; I dont’ have any real physical strength, so all of it comes from my biting words,”  he laughed starting to feel sleepy again.  “You on teh other hand could punch someone in the face and knock them right out.”

[linkmurphy]

Trash Can Kings || Link+Kennedy

[linkmurphy]

Link cocked his head slightly, but then made a big show of pressing his head to Kennedy’s forehead.  “Are you sure you’re feeling okay?  You?  Saying you’re lucky to have met me?  I hope there’s a doctor in the house.”  He had a devilish grin on his face, but retracted his hand.  “I’m really glad you feel that way.  No one should have to be alone.”

[theharryallen]

Kennedy smiled and it was small but it was sweet, and it certainly meant something. “I’m feeling perfectly fine, my dear. Just a little emotions on display, to naturally shake things up.” He kissed Link on the forehead, and leaned back. “You’re a good friend, Link Murphy. A good friend.”

[linkmurphy]

Link was a little taken aback by the kiss, but sank back into the couch with Kennedy, wrapping his arm around the other’s shoulders.  “Well.  Thanks.  That’s one of my few good qualities.  So I’m really glad you think so.  You have potential to be a really great friend.  Just stick with me, and I’ll teach ya.”

[linkmurphy]

Trash Can Kings || Link+Kennedy

[linkmurphy]

“That better be a promise, kiddo,” He laughed, nodding at his request.  “I honestly understand that.  Any time I actually have to break down I immediately regret it if anyone’s around but.  Your secret’s safe with me.  Not cuz I fear you,” the tone was almost teasing, but he meant it.  “But because we are freaky alike.”

[theharryallen]

“I’m very lucky to have met you, aren’t I? Because you might be the way you are, but at least now I feel I don’t have to go through it all, this life, the way I am, alone. And that’s better than nothing.”

[linkmurphy]

Link cocked his head slightly, but then made a big show of pressing his head to Kennedy’s forehead.  “Are you sure you’re feeling okay?  You?  Saying you’re lucky to have met me?  I hope there’s a doctor in the house.”  He had a devilish grin on his face, but retracted his hand.  “I’m really glad you feel that way.  No one should have to be alone.”

[calebbrockview-blog]

Fancy Night In || Caleb/Link/Alexis

Caleb was excited, he had planned a nice dinner at home and had kicked Link out telling him and Alexis to come over at six both dressed fancy. He had cooked steak, potatoes and vegetables, it was finishing while he moved to do everything else. He had set the table and lit candles making sure it was all fancy. He had even rented seat covers and place settings to make sure that it was perfect for them all.

He had made up name tags and put them in spots on the table before going to change into his fancy outfit. After making sure he looked perfect he checked on the food, it was coming along perfect. Finding some of his classical music he put it on but kept it low giving the feeling of being in a fancy restaurant. He also dimmed the lights. He had even made fake menus so it would be like they were going to order their meal. He then sat back and waited for them to arrive.

@alexisinthestars @linkmurphy

[linkmurphy]

Link hated dressing up, but he liked making Caleb happy.  So he had begrudgingly brought his nicer clothes up to Alexis’ apartment, playing with her dog as he waited for it to be six.  Around ten to, Link finally agreed to put on his clothes, huffing a little but forgetting how cranky he was after he saw Alexis.  He was excited to see Caleb dressed up too, but that had to wait a little longer.  He all but dragged her to their apartment, pausing just outside the door, suddenly nervous.  “You go in first.”