Been getting into 'complaints' a lot more recently. I just wanna hear all the changes, even small things. I need to know how your clothes are fitting, how you've realised how much you've gained and how it's affected you.
I wanna hear you complain breathlessly about flights of stairs, how frustrating it is to simply move around in comparison to before. You never had to think about the seating in a restaurant or the belts on a plane. You didn't realise you were gaining until your usual jeans stopped at your thighs and now you're worried your 'fat clothes' are edging retirement.
There's something specifically thrilling about the excited concerns. You're worried how you've kept it up for so long. You complain that you're hungry when you're eating and when there's food put in front of you, there's no chance of you holding back. You're concerned how much you've changed.
Tell me about how you never thought you'd get this bad, how you couldn't even imagine having the thoughts you do now. You were so careful before and you're not exactly careless now but all you can be is aware that this is going to get worse. You'll reach another goal. You've told yourself that you're taking it easy but all of a sudden, it's like you've blinked and you're heavier.
You were so conscious before. Each time you over ate, you noted it. That was a sexual relief. Nowadays, it's turned into common practice and you don't know what to do. You're beyond the point of no return and it's terrifying.
