My Thoughts and Experience on Racial Cuckolding
Hi everyone. I appreciate all the support that I received from my friends and followers on my Tumblr blog. I made a conscious decision to share a very personal and intimate part of my life in hope that it will shed light on the topic of Asian/white racial cuckolding (a scenario where an Asian couple invites a white bull to pleasure the wife). I’m also writing this piece in response to my husband’s personal struggle with our cuckold marriage. While some of the martials on my page are sexual fantasies, I hope this piece to be more serious and informative.
I first wanted to write something meaningful about racial cuckolding due to my continual frustration at the lack of Asian cuckolds willing to appear on my upcoming documentary. The documentary is a short video exploring the ever increasingly popular theme of Asian and white cuckolding. These Asian guys were initially very enthusiastic about starring in a documentary that features a sexual fetish they’re into. But the initial enthusiasm fissured and ultimately died out after they were informed that their faces will be in full view.
Asians are particular sensitive about pride, hence the term “saving face” originates from Asian countries. So having their faces in full view is the ultimate “loss of face.” But I was puzzled and bothered by the fact that they feel it’s something to be embarrassed about. Although the documentary is not a porn in any stretch, it’s nonetheless a documentary that deals with an erotic subject. I always thought that since there’s lack of an Asian male presence in American adult films, cuckolding movies/porn can change that. That shame and humiliation felt by these Asian cuckolds are similar to what my husband went through (and still is). So it’s only appropriate that I begin this piece with my husband’s story.
My husband is a great guy. He’s very smart and resourceful. We’re also best friends as well. Plus, I do feel a special connection to another Chinese person, so dating and ultimately marrying him was the best decision I ever made.
But while he’s a great person, he’s not someone I’m physically nor sexually attracted to. It’s honestly not just about the penis size like everyone else make it out to be. While he’s very under endowed, it’s also has to do with his other inadequacies in the sex department. He has problems with premature ejaculation and erectile dysfunction as well.
While we still dating, we try to get “intimate” couple times and it was a disaster. I felt so turn off by the sight of him naked and unable to perform. I only dated and slept with white guys before him so it saddened me to see the stereotype about Asian guys being true. I know he’s the only Asian guy I ever see naked, but it just confirmed my long time beliefs about Asian guys.
I first cheated on my husband with one of my white ex. That ex was a total jerk and asshole, but sex was something that he always great at. I realize that I can never go back with this asshole, but why not just have him as a sex partner. But the guilt of being a cheater is a lot for me to bear and especially cheating on my then bf with an ex. I stopped seeing the ex and try to feel some sort of sexual attraction with my bf. Once again we tried to get intimate, but he got really anxious every time, and his inadequacies grew even more.
Not having someone for physical pleasure made me a cranky and bitchy person to be around. I grew so annoyed at everything he does even though he’s a sweetheart and always try to please me. Then one night when I was out with some of my Asian gfs, they said that they have the same problem with their Asian bfs and husbands, while the ones who dated white guys didn’t have this problem. I talked to one girl in particular and she said that she had the same problem with her Asian husband. She was active in cuckolding at the time, but didn’t disclose her activity since it’s a very taboo subject at the time (still now). It wasn’t until we became close that she said she was a cuckoldress and it saved her marriage. I was shocked at her admission about this lifestyle and didn’t really ask further.
Anyways, I dated my husband for 4 years before getting married, and during the time we dated, I openly cheated on him with other white guys. He knew I cheated and it’s an open secret but he never confronted me about it out of fear he might lose me. Whilst it’s an uncomfortable situation, I felt the cheating was necessary since it makes my emotional relationship with my husband better. I didn’t turn into a complete bitch around him and we are happy while we’re together since I’m getting the sex on the side.
The sex was not the only thing that made me cheat. My husband and I can talk forever and we like being around each other at home, but we share little in common when it comes to social activities. He’s smart and into academic things. He’s a movie buff and like action and western films (he’s an Americanized Chinese). While not at all anti-social, he’s more comfortable with a small group of close friends and prefer to do things at home. I’m like the polar opposite. I’m into fashion, dancing, and the nightlife. This makes it difficult for me to find him physically attractive since I like guys who are more out-going and social. As we hung out with different groups of friends, the cheating becomes even more common. Not only do I sleep with these other guys, but we also went out to clubs and lounges every weekends (I was still young at the time).
My husband was very understanding and never said a word about my infidelity and activities. He’s very passive and it’s not in his personality to be confrontational. Not only did he not confront me, but he felt it’s his fault for us being in this situation. So he tried to make it up by pleasing me in other ways. Like doing dishes, laundry, cooking and other domestic duties. I felt awful about it, but I’m quite useless when it comes to house work. I was the only child and my parents spoiled me and never made me do chores.
Such a loving and caring individual is someone I always want to be married to. He understands me more than anyone. It’s only natural that we got married. He’s a great person and being married to him was truly a blessing for me. He tolerates and put up things about me that most guys would not.
But again the issue of intimacy comes up. What kind of married couples don’t have intimacy? And since we’re married, cheating is out of the question. While I know what is a cuckold, I never knew it was an actual lifestyle. It wasn’t until I heard the word cuckolding in a movie somewhere and looked up what it means. Googling the word online brings up so much information. Lots of the things I see are fetishes and porn, so it turned me off immediately since I thought it’s for sexual deviants. After hours of research (and lots of porno lol) on cuckolding, I said that I can leave the fetish part out and just do it for the sex. I brought it up with my hubby and he very reluctantly agreed. I promise him the situation will be open and transparent and that he will know who I’m with at all times. There will be no lying nor deceiving behaviors by me.
The first couple guys I met were relatively vanilla and didn’t know much about the cuckolding thing. They just thought they’re having sex with a married woman. All these changed when I met the guy who’s now my current stud. He loves Asian women and dated mostly Asian girls his entire life. He’s very much into the racial aspect of cuckolding and it’s a big turn on for him.
I was clueless about this fetish at the time but he slowly got me into it like he did with his two other girlfriends. The two girls and I talked. The Korean girl is young and naive, and it’s just about the sex for her. But the Chinese girl is very much into the fetish. She and the stud talked to me about the fetish and I quickly became interested and turned on as well. They told me that not only is it a turn on for the Asian wife and the white stud, but the Asian cuckold husband will be turned on as well. It was hard to believe but I took their words for it.
It turned out they were not entirely right about the Asian husband part. My husband was horrified when I told him about it. Being the nice and wonderful person he is, he’s willing to go through with it. It’s been 8 months since I’m with my current stud and my husband is still very reluctant and uncomfortable with the whole thing.
I’m hoping to make this relationship more mainstream and less taboo to eventually make it less uncomfortable for my husband and other Asian husbands who are either reluctant or on the fence about it. I try to tell my husband that the whole humiliation and racial aspect of Asian/white cuckolding is just a fetish and role play. I still respect my husband as an individual outside the bedroom.
I hope my tumblr page is the first step toward getting a better understanding of this lifestyle. My page uses images, videos, and writings in a tongue in cheek manner to break down the misunderstanding and taboo nature of the subject.
The use of pornography on my page is not only intended to spice things up, but serves a much more important role. Porn is the most honest thing in the world when it comes to sexual attraction and preferences. You watch a particular porno because it genuinely appeals to you. A person’s preference in porn says a lot more than his/her preference in choosing a partner. Guys watch Asian porn because they like Asian girls, but a guy who dates an Asian girl can do it for so many other reasons besides pure attraction (like she’s rich or smart). Porn does not have to be politically correct like so many things in life. I personally don’t watch too many porno, but I feel it serves a very noble purpose of being the ultimate truth in terms of sexual preference. The porn, visual images, and writings on my page are not intended to promote self-loathing nor racial hatred, but to make racial cuckolding fetish more mainstream and help everyone be happy in their own skin (no pun intended lol).
I remain optimistic that racial cuckolding will be more mainstream. My page is to indulge and promote this lifestyle. I love to hear from anyone as long as the conversation remain respectful and civil. Please message or email me any of your personal thoughts or experiences on this subject. Thank you all for reading this.
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