Liz Newton's Bit On The Side

I have a couple of blogs, but they're more professional or set up for a specific purpose. Sometimes I see stuff that I'd like to share, reblog or comment on and it isn't always appropriate to link them with my other blogs. So, I've set up my bit on the side - so I can join in some of the more frivolous things on Tumblr!!

[liznewtonsbitontheside]

Prompt: eggs and/or unity

 Martin & Douglas are watching a DVD in GERTI as they await instructions from Carolyn.

In comes Arthur with his usual excited tone...

  Arthur: Evening chaps. Oh Are we watching the Great Escape again?!

Douglas: No, we’re just contemplating a great escape Arthur. Carolyn is on the phone to Mr Goddard.

Arthur: Oh I thought he’d forgotten about us again. Never mind. He’s a nice man.

Martin: Arthur, he’s a horrible man. Another horrible client who Carolyn seems to want to bend over backwards for – at our expense.

Douglas: Ahhh but he’s a very RICH horrible man Martin…

Arthur: So what are we watching?

Martin: It’s called “Sully”…

Arthur: Isn’t that the one about the plane that nearly crash landed into the Hudson River??

Douglas: Yes…. Odd choice of in-flight movie, given that we’re currently sitting in a GERTI….  A plane that flies, quite literally, on a wing and a prayer….

Arthur: [Excited] Apparently there’s some brilliant Easter Eggs on this one!!

Martin: Some what?

Arthur: Easter Eggs? They’re like hidden extra features on the DVD. You have to find them, like an Easter Egg Hunt!!

 They play around with the menus and find a secret hidden flight simulator feature

Arthur: This is BRILLIANT!!

Martin: Actually, it is quite good!

Douglas: So we’re sat in an actual plane, pretending to fly a plane… just another run of the mill day at MJN Air…

[liznewtonsbitontheside]

Prompt: Soulmate/ tulips

Mr Birling’s words had made more of an impact than Arthur cared to admit in front of his friends. What if he was right? What if he never would find love?

 As he cowered under his umbrella he lowered his eyes and watched the lights of passing cars shimmering on the wet pavement. Saturday night waiting for a bus because he’d lost the car to Douglas in a game of Snap. He’d never felt so unhappy.

 A pretty young girl came and sat beside him.

 “So much for Spring!” she laughed.

 “I know. Terrible weather for this time of year isn’t it.” Arthur replied, not meeting her gaze.

 She began humming, gradually getting louder, “In Spring again, I’ll bring again….”

 Arthur joined in with gusto, unable to resist a singalong “Tulips from Amsterdam!”

 “Oh,” the girl replied, baffled. “I always thought the words were Two Lips From Hamster Dam….”

  And that was how Arthur first met his soul mate.

[liznewtonsbitontheside]

Prompt: "card" and/or "seconds"

Prompt: "card" 

 Douglas: What’s that you’re writing, Martin?

Martin: Nothing.. nothing.. NOTHING!

Douglas: Oh come on, are you writing a valentines card?! Martin, I never knew you cared!

Martin: Oh ha ha Douglas it’s for Theresa.

Douglas: (leans over to see a blank card) well, you haven’t written much.

Martin: (sighs) no. I don’t really know what to write if I’m honest. I don’t normally do this sort of thing. I never really know what to say to women.

Douglas: Oh Martin, you’ve been going out for months now, Can’t you just say “I love you”?

Martin: Well… we haven’t actually said the “L” word yet. I’m not sure if this is the way to do it.

Douglas: Ah. Well do you?

Martin: Do I what?

Douglas: Do you love Theresa?

Martin: Well of…. This isn’t up for discussion Douglas!

Douglas: You DO!!! Oh Martin!

Martin: Shut up Douglas!!

Douglas: Martin it’s nothing to be embarrassed about! You’re both grown adults. You should express your feelings. She is a lovely girl, and the fact that she likes you is a good thing – it’s frankly baffling because she seems quite intelligent, but…

Martin: So you think I should just say it in the card?

Douglas: Of course you should. Let’s have a look at the card.

 Martin hands over the card, Douglas turns it over…

 Douglas: “With Sympathy”… well that’s one way of putting it, Martin. Maybe you might like to try in an actual valentines card though..?

[wellamarke]

fcn: clocks

There’s a big, round clockface above the door of Fitton Village Hall, and Martin has been staring up at the slow old hands for the last eleven minutes. He knows the number exactly, because it was three past four o’ clock when the old lady had stood in front of them, and said, quite firmly, that she only had room for two evacuees in her little cottage.

(At first, Martin wondered if she would take him and Simon, since it would be easier for two boys to share a room - or perhaps the lady in charge would say that he and Caitlin ought to go, as they were the youngest two and oughtn’t be split up. He had not counted on Caitlin clinging so tightly to Simon, sobbing into his jumper, simply refusing to let go. He had not counted on being the one left over.)

So now it is fourteen minutes past four, and he is the only one still standing in the village hall. The lady who brought them from the train station - Mrs Herlihy - keeps saying nice and kind things like, “it won’t be long now”, and “someone is sure to come along a little late”, but Martin is beginning to wonder if he will have to sleep here, all alone, curled up under one of the wooden tables with his overcoat spread out like a blanket.  Why couldn’t that little old lady have taken all three of them? Hadn’t Mummy said, only this morning, that they must stay together, and look after each other? He wonders if the loud tick-tock of the clock will keep him awake if he does have to sleep here - or if the hardness of the floor will do it. He wonders if—

The sound of a new voice in the passageway outside the hall cuts through his imaginings. 

“I told you we would be late, you silly boy - and here was I thinking you wanted to have someone your own age staying with us. They’ll all have gone now. I’ve never known someone so good at dilly-dallying!” 

Footsteps lead into the hall and a lady appears, with a little boy in tow who seems just a bit younger than Martin.

Mrs Herlihy’s face brightens. “Hello,” she says, “You’re just in time - we’ve one little soul left. Say hello, Martin.”

He does so, and the other little boy bounds forward immediately and takes him by the hand. “Hello! I’m Arthur. You’re coming to live with us! Can I take your case? Did you have a long journey and did you bring a scarf with you, it’s cold outside!” 

“Arthur,” said the boy’s mother reprovingly, “At least let him get a word in edgeways.”

“Sorry! I’m just so excited!”

Martin smiled back at Arthur, and let him take his case, shooting one last glance up at the old clock as they left the hall. Nineteen minutes past four. 

Still plenty of time to get in words, edgeways or otherwise, before the sun set on his first day in Fitton.

[liznewtonsbitontheside]

Just beautiful <3

[liznewtonsbitontheside]

CABIN PRESSURE BINGO!!! 

[liznewtonsbitontheside]

Prompt: “pool” and/or “That was weird”

Scene: Flap & Throttle

 Enter Arthur!

 Arthur: Evening chaps!! WOW!!!! When did we get a Pool Table?!?!

Douglas: Oh hello Arthur. Didn’t see you there, quite an understated entrance… you really shouldn’t hide your light under a bushel so…

Arthur: Pool is BRILLIANT! Me and mum used to play on holiday! Can I play? Please? Can I?

Douglas: Well, it’s Winner Stays On, so put your 50p on the table and you’ll get to play the winner of this game – will it be me, Douglas “The Demon” Richardson? Or maybe Martin “The Dormouse” Crieff?

Martin: Thank you, Douglas? Will you just take your shot please?

 Silence descends, Douglas leans forward to take his shot. Just as he is about to hit the cue ball, Arthur speaks – making Douglas jump… and he misses!

 Arthur: So where did we get a pool table!?

Martin & Douglas: ARTHUR!!

Arthur: Whoops, sorry chaps.

Martin: It’s for Fitton Youth Club. Douglas spotted it on Freecycle and we went to pick it up in the van yesterday. We’re delivering to them on Sunday – but in the meantime, we thought we’d have a little fun!

Arthur: (a little dejected that he wasn’t invited on a van job) Oh, brilliant. Well, come on then Skip, your shot.

 Martin leans to take his turn. As he’s about to hit the ball, Arthur coughs loudly.

 Martin & Douglas: ARTHUR!!

Arthur: What? Isn’t that what you’re supposed to do?

Martin: No, Arthur. You’re not supposed to put the players off when they’re taking a shot!

Arthur: But that’s what mum always did? I thought that was the game?

[rachelvanbora]

Martin:                 Heat.

Douglas:              I´ll see your Al Pacino and raise you  Robert de Niro.

Martin:                 I´ll see your Robert de Niro and raise you Ben Stiller.

Douglas:              Seriously? Of all the Robert de Niro movies you pick Meet the Parents?

Martin:                 I was trying to pick one you wouldn´t know.

Arthur:                 What are you chaps playing?

Martin:                 We´re having a movie poker night.

Arthur:                 Oh, I should have brought my hat.

Martin:                 What?

Arthur:                 People always wear hats when they play poker in the movies.

Martin:                 But were not pretending we´re playing poker like they do in the movies. The game is to find movies, in which the actors we have just named appear together.

Arthur:                 I´d like to play real poker. Just once. Mum never lets me.

Carolyn:               I think dearheart, you´ll find Douglas very poker-adverse. Since I fleeced him last time.

Martin:                 How did you do that?

Carolyn:               Easily.

Douglas:              By the narrowest of margins.

Martin:                 The word „fleece“ implies otherwise.

Douglas:              The word „fleece“ implies she spends too much time with Herc.

Martin:                 How do you mean? Douglas…has Emily talked you into another Sherlock marathon? Because this definitely sounds like a BBC 1 deduction.

Douglas:              Have you seen my eyes? They are clear, limpid even…  

Martin:                 Uhm, yes. Thank you for sharing.

Douglas:              …but I have kept my feet elevated the whole time we´ve been waiting here.

Arthur:                 It wasn´t a Sherlock marathon! It was a real one! Or, you want us to notice your shoes.

Carolyn:               Your limpid eyes have a certain melancholic quality. Your feet hurt…clearly you had  been dragged from one souvenir peddler to another. A Sherlock con?

Douglas:              I don´t need a Sherlock con to notice that during the last month  you have repeatedly referenced one specific animal species.

Carolyn:               All part of standard phraseology.

Douglas:              Or really? Like „miles to go before we sheep“? Or even (shudders) „Sheep passing in the night“?

Martin:                 Oh, that´s what that meant. I thought you were practicing for a new game.

Douglas:              She was. It´s called „marriage“.

Arthur:                 Brilliant!

Carolyn:               Now you´re really letting your imagination run wild, Douglas.

Douglas:              Whatever you say. Just don´t forget we all expect a pay raise on the wedding day.

[liznewtonsbitontheside]

Actual genius right there!

[wellamarke]

fcn round 3: kitten problems

“Wow!”

Usually, when Carolyn overheard an expression like that, it was quickly followed by Arthur bursting into whatever room she was in and announcing excitedly that the world, despite being already quite brilliant, had just got even brillianter. She had trained herself out of the inclination to ask before he announced it. Sometimes he needed the extra time to form it into sentences.

So that night, when she heard Arthur’s exclamation, she stayed put. Herc, sitting in the armchair opposite, gave her a questioning look. I have no idea, she eyeballed back to him.

After a minute or so, sure enough, Arthur appeared in the sitting room, his eyes shining. “Mum! Herc!” he exclaimed.

“Both in attendance, yes,” Carolyn said.

“Something brilliant has happened!”

Herc put down his mug. “And what might that be?”

“It’s Merlin!” said Arthur. “He’s had kittens!”

This was allowed to sink in for precisely 2.5 seconds, at which point Arthur bounded back out of the room, calling them to “Come and have a look!”

They came and had a look.

Herc’s look was one of adoration. Carolyn’s was one of mild appreciation, certainly, but also concern. “Are you going to be able to take care of them yourself?” she asked Arthur, who was kneeling next to Merlin’s basket, peering delightedly at the four tiny, furry bodies.

“Well, I should think Merlin will be able to help a bit,” said Arthur. “He’s going to be a great dad.”

“Don’t you mean–” Herc began.

“No,” said Arthur, conversationally.

“The problem is, they’ll need checking on ’round the clock, for the first little while,” Carolyn continued. “What will you do, while we’re on flights?”

Arthur sat back on his feet and considered this. “I can’t take them with us?”

“No,” said Carolyn immediately. “No cats in the hold. Ever again.”

Herc looked baffled at this, but didn’t say anything.

“Then I suppose I’ll have to stay with them,” Arthur said. “Just for a little while. That is,” he paused and looked sincerely up at the two of them, “If you think you’ll be able to manage without me?”

Carolyn and Herc exchanged a look, and grinned. “I think we might just struggle by.”

[liznewtonsbitontheside]

yes “brillianter” is a word, despite what autocorrect just tried telling me three times. 

This is spot on perfect Arthur! 

[liznewtonsbitontheside]

Last round - prompt Nutcracker

Nutcracker

 “Carolyn, I promise you will enjoy the ballet,” insisted Herc. “Fine music, beautiful dancing. I would have thought a woman with your impeccable taste would already be a fan of the ballet,” he tried changing tactics, but he should have known that flattery got him nowhere with Carolyn Knapp-Shappey.

“Herc, I am more baffled that I am having to actually queue to get into this theatre. I had no idea there were so many people into this crap,” she replied.

Herc was not to be deterred. “This is high art. Culture at its finest.”

Carolyn mellowed slightly, “okay, well what is this ballet about then? Why is it called The Nutcracker anyway?”

Herc drew breath, he knew he’d already lost. “well, one of the characters is a…..” he paused, trying to think of a better way of saying it.

“A what?” Carolyn pressed.

“Well, one of the characters is a…. Nutcracker… who turns into a Prince.” He held his breath, anticipating Carolyn’s next comment..

“High… art….?” Is all Carolyn could say.

[liznewtonsbitontheside]

Ok, I hadn't realised I could spin this out for as long as I apparently can. Seems I’ve spent far too much of my life watching and listening to British sitcoms. This is essentially Chapter 1 - but I’m writing in a scripty style because I have a weird knack of hearing character voices in my head. I know it’s not normal. 

So, just for Bryn...

Keeping Up The Cabin Pressure…

 [Obviously when reading this, assume that when CP characters say Bucket, the pronounce it BUCKET – like the water carrying thing – until they are told otherwise. When Hyacinth pronounces it she pronounces it BOUQUET – like the flowers!]

 Scene – Fitton Airfield, early morning. Hyacinth paces with a determined stride across the airfield. Several steps behind her and struggling with a stack of three perfectly matched black leather cases is her husband Richard.

  Hyacinth: Do come along, Richard. Must you dawdle so dear?

Richard: (wearily) these cases are rather heavy Hyacinth!

Hyacinth: (whispers) Please don’t call them “cases” dear. This is Executive Luggage, Richard - Handmade from the finest black saffiano textured Italian calf leather with a capacious interior. Daisy and Onslow have cases – we have Executive luggage darling.

Richard: If you say so Hyacinth…

 From her office, Carolyn spots the couple as the make their way across the airfield. She nudges Douglas…

 Carolyn: Good grief! Are they filming a re-imagining of the 80s classic “Cocoon” on the airfield today or do we think this might be Mr & Mrs Bucket?

Douglas: Oh be fair Carolyn, she’d doesn’t look much older than you!

Carolyn: (gives Douglas a steely glare and speaks through gritted teeth) Do excuse me while I see if these are MY clients – for MY airline…

Douglas: (smirking) Be my guest.

 Carolyn makes her way across the airfield towards Hyacinth and Richard.

 Carolyn: Good morning Sir, Madam. Am I to presume you are Mr and Mrs Bucket?

Hyacinth: I am Hyacinth BUCKET and this is my husband Richard.

Carolyn: Ah of course, Mrs… er … Bucket… Welcome to MJN Air. My name is Carolyn Knapp-Shappey. Do follow me. I believe we have the pleasure of taking you to Spain this fine morning? Is it business or pleasure?

Hyacinth: (Proudly) It’s just a short excursion to the villa in Ibiza, to visit my sister Violet – the one with the sauna and the swimming pool and room for a pony.

Carolyn: Gosh that does sound fun…

Hyacinth: Of course Richard was more than happy to book a more traditional mode of transport, but I said to him ‘Richard, you are a retired executive and you should travel like one’.

Carolyn: And MJN Air of course springs naturally to the front of the mind the instant the words “executive” and “travel” are uttered in the same sentence! Follow me to the office and we’ll just finalise some paperwork whilst my son Arthur puts your cases safely in the hold.

Hyacinth: Mrs Knapp-Shappey, Retired executives like Richard do not carry ‘cases’ on excursions to their sister-in-law’s villa. This executive luggage is handmade from the finest black saffiano textured Italian calf leather with a capacious interior.

Carolyn: Of course it is, madam. The very thought that you’d bring cases… Do take a seat in my office and I’ll find Arthur to secure your executive luggage.

 Carolyn closes the door behind her and exhales loudly.

 Carolyn: (to herself) I think the “Cocoon” remake would have been preferable.

TO BE CONTINUED!!!!

[iwanttotieyourshoe]

Creativity Night Announcement

The next Creativity Night will take place in the fandot chat Saturday 24th of September!

“What is this creativity night?” You might ask.

Well, read our excellent FAQ post by @madnina and you’ll find out all you need to know.

From 7 pm UK time (and for as long as people want to play), we will gather together in the chat room, give quick prompts to work on, and then share with each other and give each other feedback.

We’re keeping the time for each prompt short (15 minutes) so we can create a lot of different things in one night. Just remember that this is just meant to be fun and can work as a writing/drawing exercise, so the plan is to not spend too much time on each piece. If a prompt triggers a more complex idea, there’s of course no reason you can’t work on this and post it later. If another prompt doesn’t speak to you, you can of course skip it and wait for the next one. If you just want to hang out in chat while this is going on and maybe give the creators some positive feedback, you are more than welcome to do so. I’ll see you all in the fandot chat Saturday the 24th!

[liznewtonsbitontheside]

I am actually free... But it will be my first Saturday off for three weeks, so I may be drunk... Could be fun ;)

[liznewtonsbitontheside]

Rapidly approaching bedtime, but couldn’t resist… Prompt: christmas cards and/or humidity.

Merry Fandot Summer Christmas, one and all!!!

[liznewtonsbitontheside]

Prompts: snow angel and/or swimming trunks

“Mum, I think we need to talk.” It was rare that Arthur was ever this serious. Carolyn could tell something was really troubling her youngest son. She sat down at her desk and gestured to him to sit opposite her.

“What on earth is the matter, Arthur? You look like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders” she said gently.

“I’ve just been speaking to Karl from ATC. He told me something and I think I need to tell you about it straight away” replied Arthur. He was visibly trembling now.

Carolyn was worried. She hadn’t seen Arthur like this for years. There had been some bad times during the divorce from his dad, but she had no idea what could be bothering him this much now.

“Of course. You can tell me anything, you know that.”

Arthur composed himself.

“Karl said that he was looking at the photographs on Facebook of when we were in Australia. And Douglas…” he gulped.

“Oh Arthur, just tell me – please!” Carolyn begged, not being able to stand seeing her son like this a moment longer.

Arthur continued, “Well in one of the photographs, Karl said he saw Douglas and some Budgie Smugglers. I’m really worried mum. I think Douglas might be involved in something dangerous.”

Carolyn breathed a sigh of relief. “Good grief! You silly boy! Budgie Smugglers is what the Australians call those ridiculous little swimming trunks that Douglas was parading around in!” She held her breath, hoping that Arthur’s next question wasn’t going to be “why?”.

[aura218]

It Wasn’t the Bermuda Triangle

[Fandot creativity, ST:TNG/CP xover, no warnings, no ships]

“What I don’t understand,” Douglas said from his biobed, “is why you’re the only one of us who isn’t radioactive.”

“Some of us wear sunscreen.” Martin sniffed imperiously.

“Mr. Crieff –” said the pale robot-man who followed them from the cargo hold.

“Captain, please,” Martin said.

“Martin, hush up.” Carolyn tapped the containment field with her fingernail, making it shimmer with an unholy noise.

“Captain Crieff, were you aware of the anomaly before you flew into it?” the mechaman said.

“Of course not!” Martin stood to his full height. He was irritatingly aware that people in the future were, on average, taller. “If I'd seen it, why would I have flown into it?“

The black man with the Alice band over his eyes said gently,

"Well, your sensors are a bit, um, underdeveloped –”

“Our aircraft is perfectly airworthy for normal flight conditions. In fact, I’ve landed her under the worst conditions.”

“He really means it,” Douglas piped up. “Sometimes, the captain creates even *worse* conditions just to test himself. Like that time he thought he’d give landing in the Yellow River a go.”

“It looked like an airstrip in the dark!”

The two … spacemen? spoke together quietly. The synthetic one was  really very sophisticated, carrying on an actual sensible conversation. Even Arthur couldn’t pull that off.

The doors swooshed open to admit a slender, bald man. The man introduced himself as Captain Picard, the man in charge of the ship. Finally! Martin immediately felt a little better that someone important was taking notice of their unique situation.

“I assure you, my people will uncover the cause of your, ah, displacement. And we will return you to your previous –”

Carolyn made her forcefield make that awful noise. Picard turned to her, getting that look in his eyes like he was looking down the length of a Lwaxanian “phase”.

 "And how long will that take?“

Picard clasped his hands. "Ah. Yes. Soon. Very soon. Our best people are working on it.”

It took Picard no time to wiggle out of Sickbay, turning them over to “the illustrious Commander Data.”

Douglas, who’d been watching the scene play out from a leopard-like lounge across his biobed, said, “Well I feel completely confident and assured now.”

They were released from Sickbay, and all was going well, until they found Whoopie Goldberg running the bar. And she said she adored Douglas’ character in V for Vendetta.

Wrapping his hands around his mug of mulled syntho-wine, Arthur was the first to speak. 

“Skipper, I don’t think we’re in Kansas anymore.”

[liznewtonsbitontheside]

“Sometimes, the captain creates even *worse* conditions just to test himself.” is the funniest thing I’ve read all day! 

[liznewtonsbitontheside]

Prompts: mulled wine and/or sunscreen

Arthur: Mum, is Mulled Wine called Mulled Wine because it comes from the Isle of Mull?

Carolyn: No dear heart. It’s just wine that has been, erm, ‘mulled’.

Arthur: Oh right, so Mulled like someone has just thought about it a lot, like mulling it over?

Carolyn: No, no, no! Mulled means, well, it means…

Arthur: It’s ok if you don’t know, mum. I can always ask Douglas.

 [Douglas walks in]

 Douglas: Did I hear my name being taken in vain?

Arthur: I’m not sure what that means, so probably not. Mum and I were just wondering…

Carolyn: No Arthur, YOU were just wondering. I was minding my own business trying to wrap Herc’s Christmas present.

Arthur: ok, yes, I was just wondering – why is Mulled Wine called Mulled Wine?

Douglas: It just means the wine has been sweetened and heated and flavoured with spices.

Arthur: So why don’t we just say that?

Douglas: It’s a transitive verb, Arthur.

Arthur: A what?

Douglas: Never mind. Why do you ask anyway?

Arthur: Because it’s what mum’s got you for Christmas.

Carolyn: ARTHUR!!

Arthur: Whoops! Sorry mum!

[liznewtonsbitontheside]

Prompt: stockings and/or ice cream.

OTTERY ST MARY – extra scene!

 Martin: Douglas, could we pull over for a minute or two? My ankle is cramping up – I think I need to give it a stretch.  

Douglas: Of course. I’ll pull off at the next junction.

Arthur: Brilliant! Can we….

Martin: No, Arthur, we are NOT stopping at the Motorway Services. I just need to move a bit.

Arthur: Awww…. Yellow car!

 [Douglas pulls the van into a layby]

 Arthur: (Gasps) Douglas!! There’s an ice cream van down there!! Can I get an ice cream? Can I? Please?

Douglas: (sighs) Go on then. Bring me back a 99 too. Martin? Want anything from Mr Whippy?

Martin: I’m fine. Well, actually I’m not fine. I’m in considerable pain and in no way comfortable and in an ideal world I’d be at home resting and not hobbling around at the side of the A30!

Douglas: I’ll take that as a no then…

 [Arthur goes off to get ice creams, humming “Those Magnificent Men in Their Flying Machines”.]

 Martin: So, you and Herc: is the rivalry purely work- related or is there more to it?

Douglas: If you mean do we share any ex-wives, no, nothing like that. It’s a long story and not one I’m going to share on a jolly to Ottery St Mary.

Martin: It’s not a JOLLY. This is my work. This is how I make my living!

 [Arthur comes running back over]

 Arthur: Erm, chaps. The ice cream man isn’t selling ice cream, he’s broken down. He wants to know if anyone has any stockings because his fan belt has snapped.

Douglas: Why on earth would three – well, two and a half – grown men be in possession of any stockings on the roadside?

 [Martin looks embarrassed]

 Douglas: Oh, Martin! You have haven’t you! (teasingly) Are you wearing ladies stockings?

Martin: I am not wearing stockings!! There’s a pack unopened in the back of the van though…

Douglas: Go on then, what’s the story?

Martin: If you must know, I sometimes use them to secure things in the back of the van so they don’t scratch the surfaces.

Douglas: [smirking] Quite the little “Life Hacker” aren’t we, Martin?

[liznewtonsbitontheside]

I started trying to sew one but it went very wrong when I sewed a right and a wrong side together. Gave up and scrappily doodled one in PS instead!!