Continuation of this post
It had been years since Donella last hit Hugo. He thought he was too old for such disciplinary actions. Getting punched in a fight? Yeah, that will bruise him and his ego, but he’ll be fine. Getting slapped as a form of punishment? How…juvenile. He hadn’t felt this sting on his face since he was 13, after going against her orders and mouthing off. The angst and rebellion of a teen are predictable to parents, but Donella was his boss, not his mother. She had no patience for his arguing and disobeying. He should have remembered that. What in the hell made him think he could go against her and not expect this response?
Hugo wanted to blame his comrades for clouding his judgement. The time in the mountains, secluded with only their company, spoiled him.
He had forgotten the wrath always bubbling beneath her cool facade. He had taken the weeks of peaceful respite from her for granted and was being punished. Hugo flinched when Donella’s palm whipped through the air and landed hard against his left cheekbone. His body tensed up in response to the pain. The burning on his cheek shocked him into stillness.
“Stop acting like a fool,” Donella ordered. “I did not have you go this far for you to turn weak and be swayed by those brats. You’re smarter than this, Hugo.”
Then why do you treat me like an idiot? Hugo wanted to respond. Heat radiated across his face, half from the burning of the slap, half from shame. When the team finally entered Ingvarr, Hugo was determined to see Donella and work out a solution for Varian and the others to access the library. After they saved his life in the mountains, he owed it to them to try.
Varian and the others knew about Donella and her sketchy history as Ingvarr’s royal engineer and as an underground arms dealer. They had crossed her path earlier in their journey and had stopped her shipment of weapons being supplied to a group of Saporian separatists. What they did not know was that Hugo was her ever-faithful underling. While Hugo managed to get the group out of her hair that time, they’d left a bad rapport with her and destroyed a good amount of her supplies.
That had been 6 months ago. By the venom in Donella’s voice, it was still a fresh wound to her.
“I know,” Hugo finally spoke when he realized she was waiting for a response. “I just thought-”
“Thought what?” she interrupted. “You thought I would consider sharing the library with them? That I’d play nice and let you finish pretending to be part of their adventure? That I would rework my plans because you got soft?”
“That’s not-, I haven’t gotten-”
“Oh, please, Hugo,” she sneered. “Don’t think I haven’t noticed. You’ve spent too much time with those kids. I trusted you with this mission because out of all the young ones working for me, you’re the one I could count on to stay focused.”
“I am focused!” Hugo snapped. “I completed all the trials so far with them. I traveled across the mountains. I almost froze to death. I lost part of my hand! I’ve done everything you’ve asked of me and more. I didn’t just tag along with them; I’ve become a teammate to them. Varian, Nuru, and Yong trust me.”
“Because they think you’re their friend. Your mistake is thinking they’re your friends too. That is the only reason you’re here sniveling and pleading on their behalf.”
Donella walked away from Hugo, filled with so much disappointment in him that she couldn’t bear to look at his pathetic state. She strolled to the window of the inn room they rendezvoused in, and stared out at the passersbys in the street.
“Tell me, Hugo,” she continued. “Will they still consider you their friend when they realize you’ve been lying to them from day 1? What will Varian think when he knows you betrayed him? And that you’ve been working for me the entire time? If Varian is anything like Ulla…when he finds out the truth, he’ll shut you out without another thought. I can forgive your lapse in judgement, just as I’ve forgiven your previous failures. I see you for who you are, Hugo, and I accept it. When your friends see you, the real you, they will not be as kind as me.”
Hugo swallowed the lump forming in his throat.
“Go back to your mission, Hugo,” she ordered. “After this trial, you will collect all of the totems and bring them to me. It shouldn’t be difficult for you to sneak away with them now. As you said, Varian, Nuru, and Yong trust you.”
Something was off about Hugo these past few weeks. Varian could feel it. He didn’t know what was wrong, but ever since the team made it to Ingvarr, their temperamental blonde had been quieter than usual.
At first, he thought Hugo had gotten into a fight or altercation of some sort. Hugo returned one evening with red streak marks across his cheek and a sour mood. Varian was confident someone had laid hands on him and was ready to find out who it was, but Hugo explained it was a silly accident and nothing was wrong. When Varian pressed for more details, Hugo pulled away.
From that day on, Hugo’s attitude toward the group teetered between awkward and distant. Gone were flashes of the Hugo they had gotten to know: an unexpected laugh at a lame joke, his snarky tone when proven right, the side eye he gave when they provided ridiculous suggestions. Those flashes of their friend disappeared just as quickly as they had emerged. His silence unnerved Varian. He was used to hearing the blonde complain or boast, filling the air back with their silly arguments and debates.
Varian could only chalk up Hugo’s behavior to being back in his hometown. Ingvarr was not as bad as Hugo made it out to be, but the town did have problems. It was possible that Ingvarr brought out nothing but uneasiness for Hugo. Maybe once they returned to Corona, Hugo’s mood would lighten. The team was ecstatic when they finished the 6th trial. They were almost at the finish line.
Varian stayed up late that night counting their supplies to confirm they had enough provisions and equipment for the long journey back. The others, exhausted from the trial, knocked out early in their tents. Varian’s body was sore and needed rest, but his mind buzzed from the high of being one trial away from completing his mother’s work. He took inventory of their chemicals and found a few experimental vials from Hugo.
Inside the vials, teal and magenta concoctions sloshed. The blonde had been working on his own chemical experiments lately with Varian’s help. In exchange, Hugo provided him with further explanations of the complicated study that was mechanical magic. Varian found the subject too unpredictable for his taste. Come to think of it, it was almost as unpredictable as Hugo. He thought he had a foothold on the guy, but being in Ingvarr wiped that away. He looked so sullen that it was making Varian miss the old Hugo.
Varian rolled one of the vials between his fingers. It was strange to miss a person who never left. It was even stranger that Varian missed the Hugo, who drove him insane and challenged most of his orders. He never would have believed that the artificer’s talent to annoy him would be longed for. Would be desired.
And that’s the icing on this shitshow of a cake.
He had ignored and pushed away the ever-growing feelings spiraling in his chest. It had been easy to count off these thoughts as passing fancies and silly delusions. These few weeks of a despondent Hugo showed Varian that he didn’t just miss him; he wanted him.
Varian watched as the vial softly glowed in his hand from the heat of his touch. He wondered if Hugo knew. He had to admit that keeping his crushes a secret was never his forte. When Cupid played with Varian’s heart, his affections were so noticeable that they bordered between cute and pathetic. He was always too forward with his feelings. That would be an issue with Hugo for sure; a man whose instinct was to pull away when others got too close (literally). How does one confess their feelings or hint at them to a person like Hugo without major consequences? Varian knew what his answer would be. His brain tried hard to convince himself he was right and any confession would be futile, but his heart continued to flutter whenever those flashes of an amused Hugo invaded his mind. It wouldn’t be long until he made a fool of himself. He could just imagine it, trying to flirt and being instantly rejected, if not laughed at for his embarrassing display. Varian finally placed the vial down and buried his face in his hands.
“Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.”
He softly muttered to himself. Because it was stupid. This was not the time to be thinking about this. Maybe once they were far enough from Ingvarr that whatever hold it had on Hugo could be broken? Then maybe…Hugo would be in a better state to gently refuse him.
Varian jumped, not expecting company so late in the night. He turned to see Hugo staring at him, wearing an old tunic shirt he often slept in.
“Geez, you spooked the daylight outta me,” Varian sighed. “And yes, I am. What are you doing awake?”
Hugo shifted his weight from one foot to the other.
“I couldn’t sleep,” he answered. “Do you need any help?”
“Oh, um, yes, if you don’t mind. I was packing the last of this stuff up.”
Hugo joined, working in silence. At some point, Olivia popped out from his shirt pocket and let out a small squeak.
“You can help too, Liv,” Hugo answered before letting her scamper down his arm and jump onto a nearby table. Hugo had managed to fix her when the team was in Umbra. Whatever magical source Hugo used this time around made Olivia more hyper, but also more distracted. The mechanical mouse began collecting the small bolts and vials to organize and group. She cleared half of the small knick-knacks on the table before getting bored and deciding to play around. The sound of her squeaking and chasing Ruddiger filled the air.
“So…are you excited to be back on the road?” Varian asked, doing his best to make the moment less awkward. Hugo paused and gave off a little shrug.
“I guess. Are you happy to be going home?”
“Mmm-hmmm,” Varian nodded. “I miss my family, my friends, and especially my bed. Sleeping on the ground for almost a year is not for the weak.”
A soft chuckle escaped Hugo’s lips, but when Varian looked over to see this joyful sight, Hugo’s smile faltered, and he turned away. Varian hesitated before stepping towards Hugo.
“…you…don’t like being here, do you?” Varian prodded. When Hugo didn’t answer, Varian took another step closer. “You’ve been acting differently since we got to Ingvarr. At first I thought being back home was the problem…But I think it’s something else.”
Hugo paused briefly but went back to packing, moving further away from Varian.
“Something did happen, didn’t it?” Varian asked, convinced. He followed Hugo as he walked away carrying a box of supplies to the carriage. “Hugo, please, stop and talk to me. Whatever happened, I can help-”
Hugo slammed the box onto the cart, scaring Varian into silence. Ashamed to have frightened him, Hugo took a breath to settle his nerves. He turned around to face Varian. Varian stared hard at Hugo, peeved that his face was neutral and apathetic.
“Nothing happened,” Hugo responded.
“Not until you tell me the truth.”
Hugo hated how stubborn Varian was. He hated it more that he couldn’t fool him as easily as before. He couldn’t convince him with silence and shrugging anymore. He had to tell him something.
“You want the truth? Fine.”
Varian held his ground, waiting for an explanation.
“You were right about Ingvarr,” Hugo softly confessed. “I hate that we had to come here. I’ve never liked this place. So that’s why I’ve been…you know.”
“Why?” Varian pressed, his features softening slightly. “What happened for you to not like your home?”
“Nothing happened…it’s just…this has never felt like home to me,” Hugo answered honestly. “No place has. Ingvarr’s nothing but a city I had to deal with growing up in. Being here reminds me of that. That’s all.”
Varian wasn’t fully satisfied with that answer, but he moved aside, and Hugo walked back to the small stack of supplies. What Hugo had said wasn’t a full lie. By adding a bit of truth to his words, he knew Varian would accept it. Still, saying it all out loud made it feel more real and depressing.
“You know, when all of this is done, we can find you a home,” Varian said, grabbing a crate nearby.
“I didn’t realize the Royal Engineer of Corona handled the population of vagrants in its walls,” Hugo grumbled, snatching up a sack and trudging to the carriage. “I like to travel. I don’t need a house.”
“That’s not what I meant,” Varian argued, setting down the crate. “Well…not entirely.”
Hugo gave him a puzzled look, carefully placing the sack in his arms onto the carriage.
“What I meant to say was, I want to find you a home,” Varian reiterated. “It doesn’t have to be a house or something like that, but it would be nice if there was a place you could feel like you’re home. Someplace that when you’re done traveling, finished with adventures, or take a break from creating chaos, you can return to…to just…be you, I guess.”
Hugo paused and thought about it.
“And where do you think that is?” Hugo pondered.
“Well, if you’re not opposed to it…Corona doesn’t have a Royal Artificer,” Varian suggested, picking at his gloves. “The inventions I’ve seen you create are very impressive.”
“Impressive? You really think so?” Hugo asked, enjoying the rare opportunity of Varian praising him. Varian nodded, not caring that the blonde was fishing for compliments.
“We wouldn’t have gotten through these trials without your skills and talent,” he continued. “And don’t even get me started on Olivia.”
As if on cue, Liv squeaked next to Hugo, who bent down to let her jump onto his open hand. He lifted her up and held her out to Varian, who smiled and patted her with his finger.
“She’s a masterpiece if I’ve ever seen one,” Varian chimed, earning him a playful nibble from the mouse before she bashfully scuttered back into Hugo’s pocket. “The princess would agree with me that Corona would benefit from having a brilliant artificer like you. O-of course, that would be up to you. I’m rather biased on Corona being a good home. I don’t know if you’ve ever been there before, so maybe once we get there, you can make a decision-”
Hugo watched as Varian nervously rambled on and on. He was so flattered by Varian’s words of commendation that it took a while for him to break out of the daze of joy clouding his mind.
“But what do you think?” Varian asked, snapping him back to reality. “We’ve visited all the other kingdoms and towns. Maybe one has already called to you? Where do you feel most at home?”
Hugo took a moment to consider this. Where was home? Where and when did he feel like he could be himself? Hugo found his answer, looking down at Varian’s gentle smile. Hugo felt the most like himself when he was with the gang. He felt at home when Varian was near. They understood him. They cared for him. The warmth of a hearth could not compare to the ease Hugo felt when they were near.
Hugo couldn’t bring himself to say it. It was too embarrassing and silly an answer.
“I’m…um…not sure,” he lied. “That’s a rather big question.”
“Ah, r-right,” Varian agreed. “But…will you consider it? Corona, I mean?”
“If I didn’t know any better, Goggles, I would think you were asking me to live with you,” Hugo joked, shaking off the jitters.
He blinked in surprise, gazing down to see Varian staring intensely at him. He could see his cheeks, covered in a multitude of freckles, burning a delightful shade of pink. There was a playful spark in his blue eyes that Hugo had never seen before.
Hugo had the strangest urge to grab Varian. But whether to shake some sense into him or spin him around in delight, he could not tell. He had the strongest impulse to touch him, to make sure this wasn’t some twisted mirage.
Varian Ruddiger was flirting with him.
Mr. Royal Engineer of Corona was making advances and toying with the heart of a street rat, and Hugo was granted the overwhelming revelation that he enjoyed it. Hugo wanted to tease back. He wanted to woo and play and make Varian blush more, but he’d die of embarrassment if he tried to. He needed to do something or say something. How could he? When all he wanted to do was hug the silly little fool in front of him and say ‘yes’ a million times. But it wasn't the 'yes' part that astounded him. It was the fact that Hugo wanted to hug him. For the first time, Hugo wanted to display these new and intense affections he held for Varian. He wanted to place his arms around him and hold him close. To feel the warmth of this embrace and find out if Varian's heart was thundering as quickly as his. He maybe wanted to do more, but he didn't think his heart could handle any further surprises.
It was a ridiculous idea.
Hesitantly, Hugo took another step, closing the distance between them. Varian didn’t move away as the artificer entered his personal bubble. In fact, Hugo noticed Varian’s throat contract with a nervous swallow.
But unlike the past, he wasn’t going to completely pull away this time.
“Then…I will consider accepting your offer.”
He watched as Varian blinked in surprise. Varian’s blush intensified, not prepared for a genuine answer.
“Don’t get so worked up, V,” Hugo slightly teased. “I didn’t say ‘yes’.”
“But it's not a ‘no’ either, right?” Varian asked, trying to compose himself.
Hugo shrugged playfully, making Varian roll his eyes and smile.
“Don’t take too long to make your decision,” Varian warned him. “I might revoke the offer. Now, if you don’t mind, I’m going to bed for you to finish the rest. You can handle those boxes, right?”
Hugo nodded, earning him a half-assed salute from him.
Varian yawned as he strolled away to his tent. Hugo stayed and watched him leave. He didn’t mind staying up later to finish packing. Hugo knew he wouldn’t be able to sleep anytime soon after that. It was like a dream. Varian was flirting and offering him a grand future he could never hope to have, all in one night. It was too good to be true.
As Hugo grabbed the final box, one of the totems fell out of a loose bag and rolled onto the floor. Hugo reached down to grab it, and when he did, he heard Donella’s voice whisper in his head.
Hugo stared down into the bag the totem tumbled out of. Nested inside were all the remaining ones the team had earned throughout their journey. All totems were in his hands…and Varian, Yong, and Nuru were in their tents.
He could leave and get the totems to Donella long before the group knew he was gone.
A breeze of wind traveled through the night air. Crickets chipped carelessly in the grass. The moon shone down on Hugo as he tightened the totem bag and placed it onto the cart. He wasn’t going back to Donella. Not when this night filled him with so much hope.
“Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.” Hugo mumbled to himself. Even if he knew this was the right choice, he also knew it was going to bite him in the ass.
“…what?” Varian asked, his voice trembling.
Hugo stared down at the stone floor. He couldn’t bear to look up at Varian.
When the group arrived at the final trial and managed to open the portal to the eternal library, Donella swooped in to break up their celebration. Her minions captured Hugo, Nuru, and Yong, leaving Varian to stand alone against her. But any fight Varian had in him vanished when Donella revealed that Hugo had been working for her during most of their adventure.
Varian’s focus turned to Hugo, stunned by her words. He didn’t want to believe it.
“Hugo…is she telling the truth?” he asked again, taking a step towards him. Hugo considered lying. He could lie and say Donella was making everything up. He could weasel his way out of this. It wouldn’t be hard, right?
At that moment, Donella nodded at the guard holding Hugo, and Hugo was tossed onto the floor, his knees skidding on the concrete ground. When the blonde looked up, he saw Varian’s face. Tears pooled in those baby blue eyes of his, and it broke Hugo’s heart.
There was no running away from this.
“…yes,” Hugo answered, still kneeling before him. Varian shook his head, still not wanting to believe it. “Varian, I’m sor-”
“NO!” Varian yelled at him. He got close and grabbed Hugo by his collar. The guards moved in, but Donella signaled them to step back. She was deeply interested in how this would play out. “Tell me she’s lying! Tell me-”
“She’s not,” Hugo confessed, deciding not to run away anymore. Varian froze, waiting for any explanation Hugo could give to justify his actions. But instead, Hugo laid everything bare. “I was the one who stole part of your mother’s journal for Donella. Under her command, I joined your group as her spy. I kept an eye on you and our progress in the trials to report to her. I…I reported to her after we collected each totem…”
Hugo could feel Varian’s hands shaking.
“All this time?” Varian trembled. The flux of wind bursting from the portal behind them almost muffled his next words. “And you never told us… Even…even after the mountains?”
Hugo swallowed the lump in his throat and nodded. One of Varian’s hands let go of his collar and balled up into a fist. Hugo tensed up, fear gripping his heart at the threat of being hit. Varian’s fist rose, and Hugo flinched as his arm whipped toward him.
titsay
germansingergirl
gummygunk
dededos
theartofmadeline
jacobvanloon
blakekathryn
