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@love-affliction
btw if youre young and scared of doing adult things without your parents ive learned that like 90% of the time you can just tell the doctors office or the dmv "haha sorry ive never done this without help before... can you show me how to do this?" the employee will not care. if that means anything to you
Jerry Uelsmann (1992)
I wonder who I'd be if I wasn't always enduring. Sometimes I think there's a softer version of me somewhere - one who never had to be this tired, this guarded, this endlessly resilient. But I buried her the first time I realized the world doesn't stop breaking you just because you've had enough.
Kellie Luna
“You really fucked me up and now I’m scared to let anyone close to me again. I am scared to love, to get close, to get attached I am scared they will see how badly you hurt me and how damanged I am. That they will run away because they realize there is no fixing me and that they don’t even want to bother. I am scared I will have no one now because you broke me to the point that I can’t be put back together. Now all I can think about is why would someone want somebody as broken as me?”
—
“I’ve drank vodka that was easier to swallow than your goodbyes were. And woke up after with the room spinning and I could still function better than way you left me.”
—
“Don’t you think if I could turn off my feelings for you I would have done it by now.”
— You’re tearing me apart and I want turn off how I feel but I can’t
“I keep telling myself things will get better I will get better but then I realize I can’t fix the whole in my chest with band aids and I also realize maybe I dont want to fix it because it’s the only thing you left behind”
— (via love-affliction)
“When you planted flowers inside of me I thought you were going to water them too.”
— silly me, they died (via love-affliction)
“My chest feels like it is caving in, I am collapsing on the inside. My mind is like a whirl wind spinning around so fast I can’t even focus on a single thought. I feel like my heart is going to burst out of my chest like someone is putting bricks onto it. Like I need to cry an ocean of tears but someone turned off the water to my eyes. I can’t seem to express myself one second I am happy and the next I want to scream the smallest things seem to irritate me and makes me Want to throw pictures off the walls. I want to jump off a bridge and the worst part is I try to convince myself this is all ok. This is normal. I am fine.”
—
“Love can turn even the most intelligent people into idiots. When you fall in love everything you ever knew flies out the window and it ruins you especially because most of the time it ends badly. If the love dies, so do you.”
—
“You really fucked me up and now I’m scared to let anyone close to me again. I am scared to love, to get close, to get attached I am scared they will see how badly you hurt me and how damanged I am. That they will run away because they realize there is no fixing me and that they don’t even want to bother. I am scared I will have no one now because you broke me to the point that I can’t be put back together. Now all I can think about is why would someone want somebody as broken as me?”
—
“You’re not suppose to feel like 500 bricks are sitting on your chest when you wake up in the mornings. You’re not suppose to feel like you are drowning when everyone around you is clearly breathing. You’re suppose to be living and laughing. You should be making memories and not regretting things so much. You’re not suppose to be scared of living, you’re suppose to be scared of dying and that’s where the problem is because you aren’t you pray for it and you shouldn’t.”
—
“How can another soul be tied to such a sad soul like mine? Maybe the strings connecting my soul to my soulmate is so entangled and such a knotted mess my soul just stares at it and thinks “how am I ever going to untangle all these knots?” And maybe that is why it is so sad. Because it’s scared it will never find what’s at the end of the string.”
— I’m sorry this isn’t very good at all.
“I try to tell myself I’m over you, yet here I am still writing about the way you crushed my heart into little pieces.”
—
“When the fuck am I suppose to let go? When do I let go of someone that I have loved for so long and so deeply with all that I have had? At what point have I held on for too long? When do I let go? When it hurts so much I want to give up or is that just my mind testing me to see if I can really hold on long enough? Because god fucking dammit I want it to be you I really thought it was going to be you until the end, but I never thought you’d cause this much pain. I never thought you would hurt me this way. I never thought you would make me choose like this. Do I move forward with my life or keep it on hold for you? Will you ever come back? Will I ever learn that somethings need to be let go of?”
—
“I’m not like the other girls you will meet and I mean that in the worst way possible. One day I could be a calm sea and the next I could be a hurricaine destroying everything in my path. I don’t let people close because I don’t want them to drown in me. I’m to dangerous for love. I don’t want to hurt anyone.”
—
“But oh my god, you made everyone think I set you on fire. When really I was the one who was burning.”
— Stop making people feel sorry for you when you’re the one that’s to blame
