Loved As If, excerpt from Ch. 4
“I never left you,” He told me. Tears flowed. I did not wipe them away. “But…” I sniffed in a tiny bit of air through my stuffy nose. “Where were You?” “I’ve always been with you. Always cared for you. Do you remember when the boy cut your hand with the tile?” I looked down at the small whitish scar on the back of my right hand and suddenly felt myself on Mrs. L.’s lap. “Do you remember when the boys attacked you?” I saw Mr. E. cleaning my wounds, making cocoa and driving me to the man’s and woman’s house. “Do you remember when you tried to drown yourself?” The image of Mrs. M. rushing into the bathroom, lifting me out of the tub and pounding my back to clear the water from my lungs filled the screen of my mind. Mrs. P., Dr. Robertson, Lourdes, Mr. Post, and so many other faces flooded my heart and mind.
“I’ve always been with you. Always. I’ve given you everything you need to make it to this day.” The words, “this day,” echoed through my heart and mind. “Today, you’re able to see Me with you.” The stone blew off the fathomless well within me. More tears coursed down my face. I breathed through my mouth as I rested my heart on my dear Friend’s shoulder.
