Aspiring cool he/they

They/he | Queer | nerdy loser type beat | 18

[lucian-xiety]

HELLOOOO!!!! This is my new intro to my page but im gonna leave my old one up too, i just wanted a more fun one :^)

Okay anyways... Interests!

MHA (guys i promise im not a weirdo though)

Deathnote

Hamilton

Stars Align

PTV

Sleeping with Sirens

Pochacco

Fanfiction... ao3 <3

Uhh emo people

Reading/writing things

Listening to/singing music

DNI...

Racist people. ew.

Homophobes... (in the big 25? fr?)

Transphobes. theres too much i have to say that isn't nice so im just gonna leave this

Anyone under the age of 13 cuz im lowkey (highkey) gonna be a legal adult soon.... scary

Erm okay.... basic info!

Name: Lucian/Luci Age: 18 Identities: Transmasc, queer but attracted to all genders, demiromantic, Mexican American

ok bye

[lucian-xiety]

vent post 😛

i love being 18 sm trust like yes dad sorry for not knowing everything automatically now that im legally an adult and my mom died 😝 like my bad for not filling her shoes properly and not knowing how to do the stuff that you ALSO dont know how to do. god forbid i complain either because i already know he’s just going to tell me that life’s not fair and that it’s not easy for him either and i KNOW that like im not a fucking idiot but im also not fucking google and i dont know how to do a lot of things yet. its so easy for every adult in my life to say “well just do it, you can probably figure it out, you’re smart”. like okay but have yall considered the fact that i havent even graduated high school yet? ugh i just hate this, i hate grief, i hate not knowing what to do.

[lucian-xiety]

I WANT A BOYFRIEND!! breaking news btw

[lucian-xiety]

sighhh i really need to finish my ao3 update

(havent updated the series in a year btw)

[stardollly]

[lucian-xiety]

why the fuck is college so expensive

also im TERRIFIED to have to room with someone because i live in a conservative ass state and idk how good my luck is gonna be with roommates ✌️

[lucian-xiety]

sigh i wanna dye my hair

[pombopolvo]

I kinda want situations that force me to leave my home.

I posted about dating and stuff, and I mentioned that I don’t really do online dating. The thing is, I might just be an old-fashioned lover, because I can’t really feel any connection with someone I’ve never met irl. It’s already really hard for me to feel a connection to people at all, but online? That's even harder.

My ideal relationship would start as a friendship that slowly grows into something romantic... Like a fucking fanfic ik. But as a queer person, I’m not even sure I’m “allowed” to want that, or if it’s even realistic... Not that I give a fuck! Ik, I'm a chill guy!

- P.

It's completely realistic dw. And at this point we might just date each other because our friendship is almost a gay marriage

~ O.

They're right, it is a gay marriage.

- P.

[lucian-xiety]

gonna hit the dispo and get HIIII (⌒▽⌒)

[lucian-xiety]

yk that meme post thing that says like “im probably nonbinary but i dont have time for that rn”? thats genuinely me lately rethinking the way i see my gender. like i could write a whole rant on the way i see it now and how its changed and how i feel and how i view myself and all of this. but also i cant be bothered to change everything and explain all of this to everyone in my life 💔💔💔

[fal-con]

get your badge everyone

[lucian-xiety]

whos trying to be the bk to my dk 💔💔

[lucian-xiety]

i hate evil twinks with my whole heart ❤️

[lucian-xiety]

SOMETIMES I HATE MY FRIENDS SM LIKE WHYY GODDAMN WHO NEEDS ENEMIES WITH FRIENDS LIKE THEM HOLY 💔💔💔😭😭😭

[imjunebitch]

i did try keeping a diary for awhile but one-time I looked at an entry and it was just "IDONTWANTTOBEALONEANYMORE" written over and over again like a fucking horror movie and the entry right before was like "I made soupe today yay!" so I am like the worst diary keeper ever

[lucian-xiety]

i feel like such a freak i just wanna make out sloppy style with someone and feel them play around with my snakebites

[lucian-xiety]

ugh i so want to date someone and be in love

like i just want to be mutually obsessed with someone </333