its fucked up how being unloved by a parental figure in your childhood makes you unlovable for the rest of your life
we're not kids anymore.

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@lufronus
its fucked up how being unloved by a parental figure in your childhood makes you unlovable for the rest of your life
And suddenly you're the little kid again wondering "why am I unlovable?"
I feel like a rotting corpse that’s still breathing.
im not anyone's first choice. im not anyone's favorite. people may tell me i mean a lot to them and that im special to them but i know there's someone they'll always choose over me
yeah i Stalk you. not cuz im a creepy weirdo but because i have to know exactly what you're doing and why you're taking too long to respond and why youre online without talking to me and why you're not able to call and why you're not telling me this and why you're
otherwise i'll kill myself. you get it ?
The most I will ever contribute is through sacrifice. Sacrificing myself so I can be a stepping stone, a precautionary tale for others. The most I can ever do, is give people what I never had. I can always help the people that are dear to me, but there will never be someone who can help me.
Its only a matter of time before you'll find someone far more interesting than me, and forget that I ever existed.
i have love flowing through my veins. it’s my purpose on earth to spread love. but i’m tired of giving love as easy as breathing. when is it my turn for it to be reciprocated? when is it time to stop forcing me to love myself in absence of someone loving me?
What is so wrong with me that I’m so hard to love
I fucking hate every single part of myself
You know, no one is ever going to love me for being me.
Things my parents taught me:
I don't matter and if I ever think I do I'm a manipulative selfish bitch.
My feelings aren't real and only upset others.
I'm not allowed to struggle, I'm doing it on purpose to upset people.
If I can't do something, it's because I'm bad and lazy and don't want to try hard enough.
If I'm upset, it's because I'm bad and manipulative.
If I feel anything at all its because I'm bad and a bitch.
Comforting myself is bad and pathetic and I'm only doing it to piss my parents off.
I wish I wouldn't feel so much,
I wish I could find equal love
feel like i barely exist at all
i’m so sorry for being me
All I see when I look around is all the ways I fail as a person