Toxic pro-choice culture is:
A client of mine’s daughter had pregnancy complications and ended up miscarrying in the hospital. When she was discharged, heartbroken, she and her husband were leaving to begin to make plans for a little funeral when one of the hospital staff stopped them and said “here it is,” handing them a brown paper lunchbag with the body in it, and walked off without any kind or consoling words. Striken by the indignity of it, left without instructions, and still recovering, they didn’t know what else to do except take it home and put it in their refridgerator so that it wouldn’t decay as fast while they tried to make funeral arraingements.
Can you imagine the horror? You just unexpectedly lost your child, and it’s body is handed to you in a rude sack, leaving you with no other options except to keep it in your fridge?
And my client, as she was telling me this traumatic story, tearing up herself because she shared her daughter’s grief and loved the grandbaby that didn’t make it, thought she needed to emphasize to me how much of a loss it was because “it was a wanted baby.”
The pro-choice culture where I live is so vulgar and prominant that hospitals toss the remains of your unborn child to you as if it was nothing, and a greiving grandmother feels like she has to justify her sorrow by clarifying that it was a “wanted” child, to not go against the culture of “it’s perfectly fine to abort your pregnancy if you don’t want a baby!” But there is no difference between an unborn child who is wanted and one who is not. They are the same from every biological and moral standpoint.
It’s simply alien how much more acceptable it is to talk about supporting abortion rights than grieving the death of a “wanted” unborn child. In their hearts they know the dichotomy, but it isn’t okay to try to address it and solve it, since pro-choice is the only acceptable stance to most people.
When I had my first miscarriage, before I was taken in for surgery, I was handed a form to sign acknowledging that I knew the hospital didn’t return remains that were under 20 weeks.
“What do they do with them?“ I asked. I wish to God I hadn’t, because this was the answer.
”Medical waste.“
Those were my babies.
And even worse:
Not a single person at the hospital acknowledged I was hurting. That this was clearly a wanted child. I sat there in pre-op with tears staining my face, and not a single person expressed anything even remotely resembling sympathy.
When my cat died a few years ago, the vet and multiple techs said they were sorry for my loss.
In the hospital, I was literally hemorrhaging my hopes and dreams and no one even asked if I wanted to talk.
Pro-choice is anti-woman, ableist, and anti-science. You can’t change my mind.
When I, heartbroken and still raw from the grief of my miscarriage after years of infertility, told my now ex-friend that we had gotten pregnant and lost the baby her response (because it was before 20 weeks), “Oh, that’s not a baby. That doesn’t count.” She proceeded to tell me about an ectopic pregnancy she had, also stating it wasn’t a baby.
When my friend was actively going through a miscarriage her boss didn’t want to let her leave. She was fired because she did. Let me make this clear, she wasn’t just waiting on the baby to pass, she was actively cramping and bleeding and passing the baby at work.
Pro-choice culture is part of the culture of death.
The “it doesn’t count as a baby yet” is something I hear A LOT. A youtuber I like and follow recently got pregnant, and made an off hand comment of, “It’s actually a baby now!” in reference to the week of gestation she was in. Like??? It was always a baby? Just visible now?
Like…imagine the amount of anti-woman, anti-child, and anti-science brainwashing it takes to be okay with this mindset. People are desperate to look the other way to not feel obligated to stop the atrocities of abortion and child abuse. It’s sickening.
