This one's supposed to be my last letter for you, but I have no guts to do so, kaya I'm writing here nalang hehe. Hi! I know it's been a while. It's been 2mos and 4days since everything ended. Hindi ko kasi alam na meron na palang "siya" while okay pa tayo hehe. Oo, masakit talaga yung nangyari. Like I always cry myself to sleep, blaming myself for not being enough for you to stay. I can't see the good in mornings everytime I wake up, because all I see was the same tears that fell those nights. Sobrang hirap matulog, sobrang hirap din bumangon. Dumating pa sa point na totally ayoko nang magising pa kasi when I did, it was the same chest pain I felt. Hindi ko kinakaya yung sakit pero mas hindi ko kasi talaga kaya yung mawala ka, kaya kumapit parin ako sa "baka pwede pa" kahit alam kong wala na talagang pag-asa. Everytime magchachat ka, magtetext or tatawag, ramdam ko parin yung butterflies sa stomach ko. Hindi ko rin alam. Bago kita replyan, sandamakmak na kaba din pa muna ang mafifeel ko. Hahaha! Pero sa loob ng 3wks na wala tayong communication, then bigla na ulit tayo nagstart mag-usap for like a week na walang hintuan, I didn't expect na sayo ko parin pala makikitang masaya yung sarili ko. Siguro minsan tama nga talaga yung quote na, "The person who could make you happy again was the same person who hurt you." Pero hindi na 'ko nag-cling sa hope na magkakabalikan pa ulit tayo. Bakit? Kasi sa loob ng 1wk na yun, I became your adviser. Naging ako yung sabihan mo ng problema niyo, kinukwentuhan mo ako ng about sainyo kasi magkaaway kamo kayo. I let you feel that I'm okay, but the truth was, you broke me again little by little. Nagsisimula palang kasi akong bumangon nun e, pero okay lang. Masaya ako as long as alam kong masaya ka. So, I wrote this letter to tell you that this is my LAST GOODBYE. Not as a friend, but as being someone who's always waiting for you to come back. I know ang dami ko nang beses sinabi sayo and sa sarili ko yung goodbyes ko pero nananatili parin ako sa pagkapit, nananatili parin yung pagmamahal ko sayo, na ikaw parin pala yung tao na hindi ko makakayang hindi replyan or sagutin yung tawag or hindi makakayang hindi magpaload pag sinabi mong magload ako kasi gusto mong mag usap tayo through call. Ikaw parin pala yung same person na sobrang halaga sakin, pero ngayon wag kang mag-alala kasi ngayon, malayang malaya ka na... at ako. Hindi ko alam kung paano pero paggising ko isang araw naging okay nalang bigla ang lahat. Nakaya ko na. Oo, kaya ko nang bumangon ng tuluyan sa kung saan mo ko iniwan sa lahat ng sakit na pwede kong maramdaman. But nevertheless, you were still my favorite person in everything and the best that I have set free. Though the universe didn't make up to be together, but I assure you our friendship will be forever. Pwedeng pwede mo na ako sabihan ng hindi na ako nasasaktan, pangako. This is actually the last goodbye for my feelings for you. Please, mag-ingat ka palagi and study harder for you to reach all your goals in life. Alam mong yan ang gusto ko sayo and I will always be proud of you from the day of your graduation until maging successful ka. And I hope she motivates you everyday from the time you wake up until you close your eyes to sleep just like what I did before. Kasi kailangang kailangan mo yun, lalo na sa games mo whenever you feel down pag natatalo kayo. De nuevo, adios mi amor! Te amo. :)
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