[iuc]

[anitaskeeter-blog]

“It gets so dark so quickly now, feels like we don’t have a chance to do much any more.”

[madelinebenson-blog]

“I love when it gets dark earlier. It gives you an excuse to laze around in your pajamas all day and not feel bad about it.”

[brooke--ford]

I honestly didn’t expect to still find this here.

[madelinebenson-blog]

What is it?

[theericmattews]

Now if only my roommates would help me choose lights..

[madelinebenson-blog]

You can’t go wrong with coloured lights.

I kinda like plain white more though. It’s nice and simple. You could always have both?

[the-ryanfletcher]

Would you stay around for a bit then? Then I have another excuse not to grade.

No.. I don’t know. I just don’t see breathing helping me anything. I mean I’m there and I’m calm… so I don’t know if it’s working when I’m not.

[madelinebenson-blog]

Of course. I was actually going to start bringing my stuff up this evening if that’s alright with you? I already told the landlord I was moving out.

Well tell them that. If you don’t think it’s working, ask them to try something different. Don’t give up just yet.

[the-ryanfletcher]

That would be great.

I think I could but I don’t want to grade too late. You have no idea how annoying it is when the whole class asks you where the test is. But no… no -A’s at all I think. It was okay… I don’t know.. I’m still not sure about it.

[madelinebenson-blog]

I’m sure they could wait one more day. You look really tired. Going to bed early is what you need, not staying up grading papers all evening.

Just okay? Why? Is it too much?

[the-ryanfletcher]

Might be true. You never know.

I haven’t slept at all and I have grading to do this evening, it’s all a big blur in my head.

[madelinebenson-blog]

I’ll put on fresh pot then. I don’t want you to suddenly collapse.

Can you not leave it until tomorrow? You’ll be giving your whole class A’s by accident  in your tired state. How did your therapy session go the other day?

[the-ryanfletcher]

I need caffeine i.v. or I die.

[madelinebenson-blog]

A bit dramatic.

Rough day?

[madelinebenson-blog]

What if he's with your best friend when he tells you he's in therapy. You can't trust anyone but me. -A

[the-ryanfletcher]

I’m glad you said yes.

[madelinebenson-blog]

I don’t like being in that apartment alone anymore.

I want to be with you.

[the-ryanfletcher]

[madelinebenson-blog]

I really do miss sleeping beside you every night.

Of course I’ll move in with you.

[the-ryanfletcher]

Yes really.

I would like you staying over here.

[madelinebenson-blog]

Good. Let me just grab some stuff from my apartment.

I’ll be back up in a few minutes.

[the-ryanfletcher]

You have nothing to be worried about.

I thought the same thing, so I get you but I’d rather spend the evening with you watching a movie than talking about things we can’t change.

[madelinebenson-blog]

Really?

Okay, we can do that. We can open a bottle of wine. I’ll stay over tonight.

[the-ryanfletcher]

I don’t feel like I owe her. But I can’t just pretend there was never a connection with her either. If Zoey wasn’t mad I would even try with her but she’s a different person. 

Look Maddie, I know you’re upset but discussing this won’t get us anywhere. I love you, just you and we get through this, okay?

[madelinebenson-blog]

I’m just worried, okay! She was a huge part of your life, I understand that. But, you have to understand where I’m coming from. I’m just freaking out a bit here. I need you to tell me I have nothing to be worried about.

I love you too. It’s just been a strange day. I really thought I was never going to see her again...

[the-ryanfletcher]

You don’t want me to be friends with her, you don’t want me to ignore her. What am I supposed to do. I’m sorry but I can’t think from your point of view right now. I don’t want to steal away a friend for you, I just don’t want to tell her to fuck off either.

[madelinebenson-blog]

Do you feel like you owe her or something? Is this your way of trying to make it up to her? Do you feel guilty? Is this what this is? because I don’t see you trying to be good friends with Zoey. As you said before, isn’t this the same situation? I don’t even know if our friendship is going to survive this. So, I might not even have a friend at the end of all this. It’s just too awkward, too weird. Why can’t you see how weird this is?

[the-ryanfletcher]

You want me to ignore her? Of course I’m realizing I’m with you, I’m not thinking about anything else but you all day Maddie. Would there be one thing I could say that would make you happy? I don’t think there are any right answers to your questions.

[madelinebenson-blog]

No, but I just can’t understand why you would want to be friends with your ex. And it’s even ten time more complicated because she’s my friend. Can you please just put yourself in my shoes for a minute and imagine it the other way around.. How would you feel? Yeah, I’m starting to think so too.

[the-ryanfletcher]

I’m glad she’s okay and I hope we can be friends…

[madelinebenson-blog]

You want to be friends with your ex? who is also my best friend? You do realise you’re dating me, right? How can you not see a problem with any of what you just said?