(Drama cd and game spoilers)
It is probably no secret at this point I love this kid, but he breaks my fucking heart.
Lets talk about Noiz’s family for a second. Not only did they lock him away in a room for most of his childhood, but they ignored him screaming, crying, and banging on the door.
Theo said at one point that he wasn’t allowed near the room Noiz was kept in, which tells me that he had to have tried to get close before he learned it was something he couldn’t get away with.
So if the mental image of Theo trying to talk to Noiz through the door day after day before being pulled away doesn’t break your heart enough, lets talk about little Noiz on the other side of the door.
That room was his world. Besides tutors, he was alone. In Re:connect it states the maid would give him meals through a special opening in the door, which means the ONLY face to face interaction he had was from his teachers, which considering Noiz’s rebellious streak was probably not very healthy interaction.
Alone, besides that occasional precious moment his brother would try to talk to him, Noiz stayed in that room for YEARS!
But that’s not all. In the drama CD when he gets in an argument with his father he takes a beating, and his face gets swollen. The fact that he just stood there and took it, with the addition of how Theo tells Aoba about it makes it pretty clear this isn’t anything NEW to Noiz or the members of his family. It’s something accepted as reality nobody likes to think about.
Noiz’s parents were abusive physically, emotionally, and mentally. His conclusion from this was that nobody would care, or come to help him no matter how loud he cried or how long he kicked and banged on the door. Out of nothing but bitterness he chose to survive without them. He would go on living just to show he could. Even more, he would leave them behind by changing his name. To what? Noiz, because he wouldn’t just live, he would live with no reserve and LOUDLY because they liked to pretend he didn’t exist no matter how much noise he made. He would prove he existed, and make sure nobody forgot.
When he describes coming to Japan he uses the word “escape” which means he RAN AWAY after years of abuse.
No wonder he ended up like he did after being treated that way.
FLASH FORWARD to the fact that Noiz CHOSE TO GO BACK to the place he was treated as a caged animal, ignored, dehumanized, and beaten.
HE WENT THE FUCK BACK all because he wanted to create a life where he and Aoba could be together.
Whenever somebody complains about how childish and bitter Noiz can be, all I can think of is how BRAVE he is. He set aside his pride and his fear all because he loves Aoba.
I mean FUCK when he says “I don’t think you give me enough credit” in re:connect he fucking MEANS it. That must have been so hard for him and oh my gosh I just can’t.
Please just love this sweet baby.
End of rant
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