This is Renly Stoner having to stand and listen to his parents, Rob and Mandy, bicker about something. He is wondering how on earth they were able to raise him due to how quickly their ignorant conversations escalate to such heights. Arguing about how to fold the shirts properly so they don't wrinkle, which is the correct way to place the toilet paper roll on the holder, flap up or flap down? They have petty "fights" that result in nothing getting done except a few ridiculous and idle threats thrown at Rob, who simply stands there and makes fun of Mandy, which only causes the two to laugh and start saying things that no normal human being would say.
While these fights are nothing but silly, the amount of time Renly has stood there in that exact spot, contemplating how he got so "lucky" to have these parents, was infinite.
Watching with bated breath, hoping this once they'd actually answer him properly, the words escaped his mouth and he was waiting for a proper reply with fear on his face.
What was supposed to happen when all he asked was "What's for dinner?" was hear his loving parents ask, "What would you like?" or maybe state what was actually on the menu that evening. But this wasn't a normal family, despite their mutations, and the son would grow increasingly anxious as a silence lapsed between the question, his face darting back and forth between his family members, hoping they'd tell him. Sadly, his wish was not granted, they never were. He knows this, he has always known this, but there always was a shrivel of hope somewhere in his mind that maybe, just maybe, they were normal after all.
"Whatever our neighbors throw away after their dinner!" Mandy replied, causing Renly to look to his father, an exasperated look written all over the young Stoner's face, glaring at the man who helped create him with a sense of yearning and maybe even a bit of hope. Could he do right by his son today? Could he pretend to be normal? Please, oh please for the love of all that is holy, tell me something normal!
His eyes pleaded with his father who sat down in his favorite leather recliner whose own eyes became forlorn as he peered out the window, giving a heavy sigh though his nose. "We're on hunger strike." Renly's face fell.
Why was this almost as disappointing as not getting a kick ass Transformer when he was seven years old at Christmas? As traumatizing as finding his father dancing around in his underwear to the Macarena when he was thirteen? The fact that Renly was stuck with these parents, two people who were nothing more than adult children themselves, he found himself flabbergasted as to how he, a sixteen year old, was possibly more mature than the two people who created and raised him were combined. But there was a sad realization, like there always was after these moments between son, mum, and dad...he was just like them.
"At least we don't have to go to McDonald's and grab someone's order as they are passing it through the drive thru window."
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