hello, welcome to marble moonstones, a sfw bts fanfic blog! 🦢
basic info : call me em ! she/her pronouns , '07 liner
very busy, only post when i can :(
*please read* post
full master list below 💌
⊹ ࣪ ˖ series ⊹ ࣪ ˖
~ ot7 x reader ~
catharsis masterlist
summary: after a chance encounter with a handsome stranger, you find yourself living with him and his six boyfriends. all of whom are the most kindhearted men you’ve ever met. who will fall first? you or them? collegestudentreader!au
bangtan boys x taylor swift eras masterlist
summary: starting a new series where i’m writing each of the boys as taylor swift eras! i’m choosing a song from each album and then writing a story with a specific trope about one of the boys. since there are ten eras and only seven members, three of the stories will be ot7. 💗
⊹ ࣪ ˖ drabbles⊹ ࣪ ˖
~ ot7 x reader ~
stiletto
summary: bangtan may think they’re the mafia kings, but little do they know you are the rising queen. mafia!au wc: ~2.3k
vii
summary: seven men and how you came to date them. fluff !! wc: ~1.8k
~ kim namjoon ~
~ kim seokjin ~
snow flower
summary: moments of a perfect christmas with jin. fluff!! wc: ~2.5k
~ min yoongi ~
~ jung hoseok ~
~ park jimin ~
lucky
summary: a cute date involving your boyfriend, the barbie movie, and one strawberry shortcake milkshake. fluff!! boyfriend!parkjimin wc: ~2.2k
~ kim taehyung ~
gone astray
summary: you and taehyung are scared, but at least you’re together. lovewinsall!au angst!! wc: ~3.1k
~ jeon jungkook ~
cravings
summary: you and jungkook are just best friends, but that doesn’t stop you from yearning for more. fluff! wc: ~4.2k
u guys. i'm currently reading heated rivalry (it's..interesting lol) but i can't help but think of a bts heated rivalry au, where jungkook is definitely either shane or ilya (could go both ways tbh..) and another member is the opposite man 😭 i don't write nsfw but i do read it occasionally and i need someone to write this bts heated rivalry au please 🙏🙏
warnings: ❗️any characters in the story have nothing to do with their real life counterparts❗️f reader, reader with glasses, curse words
*lmk if i missed any*
word count: ~3.6k
a/n: guys i know it’s not even remotely close to the beginning of december but humor me and pretend it is 😭 fair warning but i planned it so the ending is around the holiday season after finals so uhhh don’t be surprised if i drop the next chapter in the middle of summer but y/n is deep into the holiday season 😀
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Weeks pass and time blurs as I'm thrown into school and homework. It's almost finals week, and for one of my education classes I get to volunteer at a children's shelter for an hour to read books, play, and generally just have fun. I did ask if any of the boys wanted to come along, and both Namjoon and Tae decided to.
That's how we got to now, me sitting shotgun while Tae drives us and Namjoon banished to the backseat.
"I still don't understand why I had to be in the back," Joon grumps, arms crossed as he stares out the window, reminiscent of a petulant child. Much like the ones we're going to visit today.
"Because Y/n is the designated passenger princess," Tae states, smiling as he navigates the roads smoothly.
"I still don't understand why I couldn't have sat in the back with Joon," I say, turning a little in my seat to look at Namjoon.
"Um, obviously because if you had then it would look like I was a driver for both of you! Or worse, people would think I'm kidnapping you both!"
I burst into laughter, and even Namjoon joins in. Taehyung grins, satisfied with our response.
"Okay okay, I'll stop complaining," Namjoon says, a hint of a smile still on his face.
Taehyung then gasps. Hard. His mouth is agape and I immediately start looking around.
"What, Tae? Did you see an animal? Did you hit an animal? Oh my god, you totally hit an animal-"
"No! I didn't hit an animal, how could you think that, Y/n?" Taehyung asks, mock hurt on his face. "I'm like Snow White, I can communicate with animals."
I huff, annoyed. "Well then why did you gasp? I swear, you make me so nervous sometimes." And ain't that the truth.
"Really? Seems like you aren't nervous at all," Namjoon pipes up from the back, and I feel his gaze on the side of my head.
"AnYwAyS, why did you act like you saw a dead squirrel, Tae?” I ask, ignoring Namjoon.
“Because..Joon hyung said he’d stop complaining!” Tae builds it up for nothing, and while I suspect that’s not the real reason he gasped, I don’t push it as I over exaggerate a smile and fist bump Taehyung, as we both continuing to ignore Namjoon.
“Come on! This is why I didn’t wanna sit in the back!”
~
After a ride with a lot of whining (guess who?) we finally make it, and get out of the car, grabbing Joon grabbing the tote out of the backseat with our picture books and coloring books we brought.
“Alright! Who’s ready to have fun with kids?” I ask enthusiastically, clapping my hands as we reach the entrance. I am so excited! I don’t get to interact too much with kids because I’m in class all the time, so it’s so fun to get to be able to play with some today.
"Me! I love kids," Taehyung says, smiling dreamily as he locks the car.
I coo internally, and Namjoon fondly rolls his eyes.
"He's not kidding. Any child he sees on the street he feels the need to interact with," he says as we go up the brick building's steps.
"That is so adorable, Tae," I say, opening the double doors to go inside.
Inside, the atmosphere is bright and welcoming, in addition to bright aqua couches, there are bins of toys scattered around the entire waiting room. A young college-aged looking boy sits behind the wooden receptionist desk and smiles brightly as we enter.
"Hello! Are you the volunteers for today?" He asks excitedly. As we approach, I notice his bright blue shirt patterned with ducks and the cloud-shaped nametag reading Jaehyun.
"Yes, we are! I'm Y/n, and this is Namjoon and Taehyung. I think I wrote their names down too on the sheet," I say, as Jaehyun rustles some papers around before nodding.
"Yes, here we are. Choi Y/n, Kim Namjoon, and Kim Taehyung! I'm so glad you guys are here. The kids have been kinda bored lately because of the colder weather, so they will definitely be glad to see you guys!"
Jaehyun gives us name tags and colorful markers while he talks, letting us write and decorate our name before gesturing to the glass double doors beside the desk.
"Go through those doors and take a right! Keep walking until you find the room that says 'Play Area.' Wendy should be in there already-she's the superviser right now-and will be with you as you play with the kids!"
We thank Jaehyun before heading through the doors and down a brightly lit hallway with sage green walls. Pictures of happy kids dot the walls and before we know it we approach a door that has a hand written sign reading "Play Area" hung on it.
"Okay, we're only here for an hour so we should be done around 2:30," I say, checking my watch.
Then we push open the door.
Loud talking and occassional screams meet us when we enter. The play room, like many of the other rooms in the shelter, has a bright wall color, this one being an energizing yellow. Around fifteen kids are playing with various toys set around the room, and comfy looking couches and kid sized chairs are also in use.
A women is sitting in a polka-dotted beanbag chair talking to a kid with cute cheeks, but when we come in she stands and makes her way over to us, dodging a Lego and hopping over many puzzles spread around the floor. I notice as she approaches her name tag reads Wendy.
"Hello! You three must be our volunteers for today," she says, smiling as she gestures to the kids. "We're so glad you could come! The kiddos love when we get volunteers."
"We're so glad to be here!" Taehyung says, boxy smile on full display.
"What were your names again?" Wendy asks, voice raising a little to be heard over the wild peals of laughter and talking.
"I'm Y/n," you say, and Taehyung and Namjoon both introduce themselves as well.
"Awesome, great to meet you guys. I'm Wendy. Now, let's introduce you to the kiddos." Wendy puts her fingers in her mouth and blows out a piercing whistle. All movement and noise ceases immediately, and the kids all turn their full attention to Wendy.
"Thank you everyone! Now, here are the names of our volunteers for this afternoon." She looks at us and raises her eyebrows and I take that as a hint.
"HI everyone! My name is Y/n." The kids nod.
"I'm Taehyung, but you can call me Tae!"
"And I'm Namjoon." Joon looks a little nervous, but then a girl whose hair is in lopsided pigtails grins, two front teeth missing.
"Your glasses are so cool!" She bursts out, eyes wide and sparkling.
She's not wrong. Joon is wearing normal wire rimmed glasses, but they have a small silver crab embedded on each temple. A small detail, but if it's one thing to know about kids it's that they notice everything.
Joon blushes, and I can't help but admire how good he looks in his glasses. While he typically wears contacts, on the weekends and after school he usually swaps them out for one of his many pairs of glasses.
“Thank you,” he replies, smiling through his blush.
“You kiddos get to play with our volunteers for an hour!” Wendy claps her hands once, and the kids start squeal in and being noisy again. Quite a few run up to us, and pigtail girl immediately grabs Namjoon's hand and drags him over to the play kitchen in the corner. I cheekily wave as he lets himself be dragged.
Taehyung gets drawn to the art corner, and sits down in a brightly colored red chair and enthusiastically begins finger painting with the kids.
I smile fondly as the boys go, then feel a gentle tug at the bottom of my shirt. I look down, and there's a cute girl with a bob haircut and the biggest eyes I've ever seen (they rival Jungkook's). One hand clenches a small white stuffed cat and the other holds onto my shirt.
"Hello honey," I say, smiling, "Do you want to play?" She pauses, eyes darting around nervously as she holds the hem of my shirt. Ah. A shy one. I understand, and was quite the anxious kid too.
I crouch down to her level, and put my ear by her mouth. "Was there something you wanted to play with?" I ask quietly, paitently waiting for her to speak.
"Yes." She speaks so quietly, I'm afraid of missing something. "What's in your bag?"
"Ah, yes." I keep my voice as quiet as possible, as not to scare her. "It's got some books and coloring books with crayons too. Do you want to color something?" The girl hesitates, then nods. "Do you want to choose where we sit?" I ask her, and she nods again, eyebrows creased.
I stand, then gently take her hand. She leads me to a corner away from the main din of the room, and we sit on the kids sized yellow chairs. I pull out the multiple coloring books and tub of crayons, putting them in front of her. She chooses an animal coloring book, and I choose a food one.
I flip in the book to find a picture of a cake and choose my colors. She searches in her book until she finds a picture of a cat with kittens. I smile, as it's clear that's her favorite animal. In addition to her small stuffed cat sitting gingerly on the table, her lavender overalls have a patch of a cat on the front.
I let us color in silence for a couple minutes, then I gently ask her, "Are cats your favorite animal?"
She pauses, crayon halting over the paper before answering. "Yes."
I lean by her ear as if I'm whispering a secret to her. "I also love cats. And bunnies. They're two of my favorite animals." The girl's mouth curves up a little, bashful and endearing as she continues to color.
My heart just about bursts, and we continue coloring until she says, "My name's Ae-Cha."
"Nice to meet you, Ae-Cha. My name's Y/n." Ae-Cha mumbles my name under her breath before continuing to color.
I pause in my coloring of the cake's flowers and look around the room. Namjoon is now full on pretending to flip a fake egg in a plastic pan, much to the amusement of the kids, and Taehyung is impressing the kids with his painting skills. They meet my eyes, and I smile before continuing to color.
As the hour passes, I stay with Ae-Cha the entire time, coloring, but also getting her to open up a little. I learn that her cat's name is Snowball, and that she also loves the color purple. She learns that I am going to school to be a teacher and that I love chocolate cake.
Wendy whistles after a while, and it falls silent once again.
"Attention, kiddos! We only have about ten minutes left with our volunteers, so please starting celaning up. To finish up, our volunteers will read a book." She claps once, and the kids start cleaning up.
I put away my crayons and shut my book. Ae-Cha finishes coloring a kitten's fur before quietly cleaning up her crayons. I notice she's also written her name at the bottom of her page.
I'm about to stand when she creases her eyebrows again, eyes widening as she turns to me.
"Is everything okay, Ae-Cha?" I ask as I notice her hesitation.
"Can you..." She trails off, and breaks eye contact, looking at the floor as her hands hold Snowball. I can tell that she's been through something, even if she's only about five. Her eyes hold unspoken pain, yet innocence at the same time.
"Yes, honey? Don't be afraid. I'm here to help you." I try to be reassuring, and eventually Ae-Cha looks back up at me.
"Can you please rip the paper out?" She finally asks, and I smile.
"Of course, Ae-Cha." I gently rip the page out, and hand it to her. But she hands it back to me.
"It's...it's for you," she whispers shyly, eyes looking at the floor again.
I feel the urge to cry, but don't.
"Oh, why thank you, Ae-Cha. I will be sure to keep it safe. Did you have fun today?" I ask her, and gingerly put the coloring page in my bag.
"Yes." It's only a word, but I somehow feel that it's more.
I hold her hand as we walk over to the rest of the kids, who are getting ready to listen as Namjoon sits in the front with a book. Taehyung sits in the back with a couple kids by his side.
I sit in the back with Ae-Cha next to him, and she crawls into my lap.
I try to pay attention as Joon reads his book, but all I can focus on is Ae-Cha. Did someone hurt this child? And if so, who would do such a thing to such a gentle and kind soul?
Namjoon finishes up and the kids clap as Taehyung goes up to read a book, Namjoon sitting where he was. I smile as Joon looks endearingly at Ae-Cha in my lap.
Taehyung's story goes by quick, and it's my turn. But as I get my book out, Ae-Cha grabs my hand.
"No. Don't go." I freeze, and Wendy comes over.
"Ae-Cha, honey, I'm glad that you had fun with Y/n today. But now it's her turn to read a book! Don't you want to listen to her story?" Ae-Cha nods, but doesn't let go as I try to think of a solution. then I realize it's simple.
"I can just read the book here, if that's okay," I ask Wendy. She nods, then tells the kids to turn around so they can face me. I open the book, Wemberly Worries by Kevin Henkes (quite a fitting book for Ae-Cha), and begin reading.
At the end of the story, I put the book away as the kids clap.
"Great story, Y/n!" Wendy says. "Now, kiddos, our volunteers must say goodbye. Can you all say goodbye to them?" The kids run to Joon and Taehyung, hugging their legs and calling out their goodbyes as I'm still sitting with Ae-Cha on my lap. Wendy comes over and sits next to me, speaking quietly.
"Ae-Cha, honey, Y/n has to go now. She's very busy, but maybe she can come back to visit sometime." Wendy looks at me questioningly, and I immediately nod.
"Of course I can come back to visit. I will try to come back within a couple weeks, okay?" I ask Ae-Cha, giving her a hug. But she still refuses to leave my lap.
"Okay, honey. I understand, you really like Y/n, but she has to go. It's time for snack, so let's go see what Miss Joy has made today, okay?" Wendy continues to talk gently to Ae-Cha until she finally gets up from my lap. I attempt to stand, but almost fall because my legs are slightly asleep from being in the same position for so long.
"Woah there," Joon says, reaching out and steadying me. I gently shake my legs until the tingling feeling subsides before thanking him.
Ae-Cha gives me a huge hug around my legs, wide eyes shimmering, as I hug her back. She reluctantly lets go as Wendy takes her hand, but keeps her eyes on me as she walks away with the rest of the kids.
Wendy thanks us again before leaving with Ae-Cha and the rest of the kids. The other kids chorus 'goodbyes' to Joon and Tae, but Ae-Cha just watches me, head turned, as her little feet walk slowly through the door.
After all the kids leave and the door shuts, my mind still thinks about Ae-Cha. What would be the reason such a sweet and innocent child would be here in the children's shelter? Sometimes the world's cruelty amazes me. I hope she can be adopted by a family that gives her all the love and care that she deserves. For now, I will just have to continue to come visit her at least once a month.
"Y/n?" A voice breaks me out of my thoughts, and I blink. Right. We have to leave.
"You okay?" Taehyung asks, eyebrows furrowed as he looks at me.
"I'm fine," I whisper, realizing that I have Ae-Cha's drawing in my bag. I want to put it on my dresser in my room so I can see it every day.
I see Taehyung and Namjoon exchange a look, but don't say anything as we file out of the room and out of the shelter, Jaehyun cheerfully wishing us a good day.
I tell the boys that I can take the backseat, and I can tell they want to protest, but don't. As I buckle my seatbelt, my mind still runs to Ae-Cha. Maybe I care too much about this little girl I just met, but I just want her to be happy and, most importantly, loved.
"That little girl...Ae-Cha, right?" Taehyung asks, and I nod. "She sure seemed to have formed an attachment to you."
"Yes." I try to smile, but inside my mind I still am wondering what happened to have her be in the shelter. Maybe I should email Wendy? Or would that be private information?
"You two looked cute together," Namjoons says, and normally, the compliment would make me blush, but I just nod and thank him.
There's a couple seconds of silence before Taehyung speaks up again.
"Hey, Y/n. I think something's on your mind, and while we will never force you to talk about it, just know that we're here for you if you need someone to listen to."
I pause, thinking. Should I ask them if it would be weird to email Wendy? Or should I just leave it be? I feel like I tend to care too much about situations I cannot control. Screw it. Might as well ask them their opinions.
"Do you guys think that I could email Wendy and ask her about Ae-Cha's story? I'm so curious about her, and I feel like she's been hurt in the past and doesn't trust easily. But she was so sweet and innocent, with those big eyes that remind me of Jungkook." Shit. Too much.
Joon laughs. "I agree. She does look a little like Jungkook. Those big eyes tell a story though, for sure." He sobers.
"I think that it would be okay to email Wendy," Taehyung says, glancing at me from the driver's seat. "The worst she could say is that it's a confidentiality breach and leave it at that."
I nod, thinking about what he said. I guess the worst would be rejection, but it would be over email and I don't have to be embarrassed in person.
As soon I get home, I thank the boys for coming with me, remove my shoes, and go upstairs and open my laptop. I have an email to send.
~
A couple hours later I'm working on an essay at the dining table while Jungkook works on his own homework when I receive an email. I pause my typing and open it. It's from Wendy.
I was quite surprised and pleased to receive your email. I am glad that you enjoyed coming to volunteeer today. The kids really enjoyed meeting and play with new faces, and please know you and your two boyfriends are always welcome back to volunteer.
As for Ae-Cha, I am more than happy to share some of her story. Please note that I cannot share more due to confidentiality practices. But, Ae-Cha was taken from her home and put into the shelter at the age of three due to her parents. I cannot share why, but I can say that her experiences from birth to age three have significantly impacted how she acts and interacts with others today. I was very pleased that she seemed to have opened up a little to you. I sincerely wish you the best on your studies, and know that you will be a fantastic teacher.
Please let me know if you ever need anything.
Best,
Shon Wendy
Seoul Children's Shelter Leader
I wasn't expecting Wendy to respond so quickly, and I'm grateful she did. I type out a response before sighing and rereading the part about Ae-Cha.
"Everything okay, Y/n?" Jungkook asks, pausing his work.
"I'm fine, Kook. Thanks for asking," I murmer, rereading the words over and over until they're burned into my brain. Ae-Cha was taken from her home and put into the shelter at the age of three due to her parents. Age of three. Due to her parents. Her parents. Parents.
"Uh, Y/n?" Jungkook asks, breaking my eyes away from staring at the word parents. "You sure you're good?"
I shake my head to clear my mind and vision.
"Yes. Sorry, Kook. I just got distracted for a moment." I force myself to pull up my essay and continue typing. Jungkook stares at me for a couple seconds, curious, before going back to his own work. I try to focus but yet I still wonder how parents could be so harmful to such a small and innocent being, let alone their own kid.
After a couple minutes of thinking about Ae-Cha, I force myself to zone in on my essay. I really need to do well on my finals, which unfortunately means not thinking about a cute girl with wide eyes who loves cats.
a/n: here's another chapter! we're in the final stretch 🥳 i have about two to three more chapters planned and then catharsis is done. it's been almost three years since i started this story, and it's been through a lot with me. i hope to finish it over the summer and then finish writing some of my other wips because it's summer and i have more time to write. thank you for reading!!! xx em
hey..me again looking for a fic i SWEAR i liked but cannot find again 😫
it was titled 'beneath the checkered flag' and it was a jungkook x reader story where jungkook was a pro racecar driver and reader was a business person or smth like that??
i tried looking up the title but i couldn't find it 😭 any help would be much appreciated!!!🙏
warnings: ❗️any characters in the story have nothing to do with their real life counterparts❗️f reader, reader with glasses, curse words, reader is drunk in this but nothing bad happens it's just feels lmao,
*lmk if i missed any*
word count: ~ 2.1k
a/n: i don't drink lmao so i'm just imagining based off of my mind and other fics. also thanks for anyone who continues to read this hot mess of a fanfic, i love you xx
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I stumble towards Jimin and raise my glass towards him.
"A toast! To you, Jiminie, our birthday boy, whom we love and cherish," I say. Or slur. I don't know. Whatever. Who cares? We're here to celebrate Jimin!
"Y/n," I hear. I look. It's Hoseok! Oh no. Not Hoseok! He's not very nice to me. I tottle over to Jimin and hide behind him. He can save me from Hoseok.
"Y/n, what's wrong?" Jimin asks, taking my glass from my hand, his brow furrowed a little.
"Why'd you take that Jiminie?" I whine, reaching towards the glass but pouting when Jimin pushes it away.
"I think it's time we cut you off, Y/n," he says, smiling apologetically. I cross my arms and huff. Whatever. I'm not even that drunk.
"Why is she scared of me?" I hear Hoseok say. I whip my head back towards him and start walking towards the table where Jin and Yoongi are sitting, desperate to get away from Hoseok.
When did it get so hot in here? And why are my feet hurting so much? In the back of my mind, I know it's because I'm at a bar with the boys and I'm wearing high heels, but I ignore that rationale.
"Hey Y/n," Jin says, and I plop into the seat next to him.
"Hii Jinnie," I say, smiling wide at him.
"I think she's had a little too much to drink," I hear Yoongi say.
I pout, hurt. "How dare you say that, Yoodles? I only had a few drinks. Do you really think I can't hold my alcohol?"
He just chuckles and pushes a clear glass towards me. "Drink this. It'll help you feel better."
I inspect the glass and shrug, chugging it down in one go.
"Ugh, my feet are killing me," I complain to Jin, gesturing widely to my heels. "Why did I decide to wear such torture devices, Jinnie? Why did you let me?"
I place my head on Jin's shoulder, sighing dramatically.
"Damn, Y/n, didn't know you were a dramatic drunk," Taehyung says, coming to sit with Jungkook in tow.
I huff, rolling my eyes from the comfort of Jin's broad shoulder. "And what kind of drunk did you think I was, Tae?"
"The emotional one," Jungkook replies mischievously, taking a swig of his drink.
"What are you saying, Hobi? I don't understand," Namjoon says, walking towards our little group with Jimin and Hoseok. Oh no. Not Hoseok!
"Hide me Jinnie!" I cry, turning my head into Jin's shoulder, careful to not smush my glasses, and close my eyes.
"Why?" He asks, and I can practically hear the bemusement in his tone.
I don't answer, suddenly embarrassed. They're all dating Hoseok, so I can't say that he's mean.
"Y/n, why?" Jin gently lifts my head up and I keep my eyes closed. If I can't see them hopefully they won't ask again.
"Y/n, please answer." Namjoon's tone is serious and I sober up for a moment and open my eyes.
"No. It's fine. Forget I said anything," I say resolutely. Shit, I'm going to ruin Jimin's birthday with my probelms.
"Guys, hold up. I think I may know why she's 'hiding' from me," Hoseok says, and my eyes widen and I shake my head at him.
"No, Hoseok! It's okay, really. I don't wanna ruin anything tonight." I plead with my eyes.
"Okay, now I'm worried. What happened that's making her call you Hoseok instead of Hobi?" Yoongi demands, and I survey everyone at the table. They, like me, are sobered up. Their backs sit a little taller in their chairs while I shrink into mine, even though everyone's eyes are on Hoseok.
Hoseok takes a moment before speaking. "Well, earlier, when Y/n had just started staying with us, I may have acted in ways-"
Yoongi's eyes narrow onto Hoseok's.
"-that I regret now! Hyung, please, I don't need a lecture. I already know how I acted was wrong, and I've apologized."
"And you're going to again, right after you explain how you acted towards Y/n," Yoongi says, crossing his arms.
"I know, I know. God, okay, so y'know back when Jin-hyung had just brought Y/n home?"
Everyone nods.
"Yeah. Well, I'm sure you noticed that I may had been...not the kindest person at the time." Hoseok winces but Namjoon is already putting the pieces together.
"Wait, are you saying you said some mean things to Y/n in addition to icing her out in the beginning when she first came to stay with us?"
Hoseok sighs, but nods. "I swear I wasn't like cursing her out or anything! I just implied that maybe she was change and I didn't like change but I stopped and we agreed to tolerate each other! And now we're fine!"
Hoseok isn't yelling, but his voice raises more the longer he talks. I don't want the entire bar to know what's happening so I quickly jump in.
"Look, it's fine. He didn't say or do anything horrible-no Yoongi, don't give me that look. I swear, that was months ago. We're good. I was only acting stupidly earlier. I'm not actually scared of him. I was drunk."
Yoongi opens his mouth but then I remember something else.
"And, he even defended me against Haneul!" The boys stiffen at mention of her name, and I see trace of anger in their eyes.
"I'm sorry, I was acting stupid earlier. Let's just pretend nothing ever happened. Please," I beg. I shouldn't have ever drunk a sip tonight. Hell, I shouldn't have even come tonight. I just ruin everything.
"Y/n, we can't pretend that didn't happen, but we all realize that was in the past," Yoongi says, shifting his attention towards me.
"And I'm so so sorry, Y/n. I hope you know that. How I acted was not right, and it never will be. You're a part of our group now," Hoseok says, eyes wide and shiny i the dim lighting of the bar.
I nod. "I know, Hobi. I know. I was acting like a fool earlier, so let me apologize for acting stupid."
Hobi just shakes his head as if my apology isn't necessary but doesn't say anything.
"Well, I think it's time we head home," Namjoon says, rising from his chair. The others follow and I mentally smack myself for ruining the night. God, why can't I do anything right? I can't even celebrate someone else.
Yoongi matches my pace as we leave the bar, falling in step beside me. I don't wobble in my heels now, too sober and sad for my mind to be clouded.
"Hey," he murmers. I keep walking, not ignoring him but not acknowledging him either.
"It's not your fault."
I hear him, yet I don't believe him. We reach the car and I climb into the backseat, mindlessly putting on my seat belt. Yoongi crawls in next to me, fastening his belt too. Jungkook drives and Taehyung sits in the passenger seat. The rest are in a different car, and Jungkook pulls out of the parking lot as he and Taehyung chat quietly, occasionally throwing glances towards Yoongi and I in the backseat.
I look out the window at the night sky. It's a beautiful night; the moon glows and the stars twinkle bright behind the skyscapers of Seoul.
"Hey, Y/n. It's okay. Jimin was, and still is, happy tonight. It was a good night for everyone, and I'm glad you came with us." Yoongi is talking to me, and I suppose that I should talk back so he doesn't worry about me being quiet all of a sudden.
I turn my attention away from the stars and towards the man next to me. My breath hitches at how breathtaking Yoongi looks in the dim light. The streetlights outside blur and bathe him in a glow that makes him look like a God.
Yoongi's lips turn up softly when I look at him.
"Please don't worry. Truly. What happened tonight was bound to happen eventually, and I'm glad that it eventually came out. We all saw the way Hobi acted when you first arrived, so it's about time we clear the air."
I nod, eyes darting anywhere but him, the boy bathed in liquid gold and shining ever bright, like the stars outside.
"I know," I say quietly, trying to will Yoongi to believe me. He looks skeptical but doesn't say any more, nodding his head. Golden light dances over his dark hair like a halo.
We arrive at the house and the exhaustion hits me like a truck. Suddenly, everything aches, including my heart.
I get out of the car and we all head inside, the rest of the boys joining us. I immediately follow Jungkook up the stairs and head to my bedroom, locking the door behind me. I turn on the nightstand light before taking off my tight dress and flinging my heels off. I don't know if I will ever be able to wear them again. The memories of tonight will cloud the enjoyment of wearing the heels.
I haphazardly search for comfy clothes and grab sweats and an oversized tee. I barely finish dressing when I feel bile at the back of my throat.
Shit.
I dash into the bathroom and hunch over the toilet, thowing up everything I ate and drank tonight. I sit there for a moment, stomach aching from the convulsing and body exhausted.
I hear a knock on the door that goes into Jungkook's room.
"Hey, Y/n, are you okay in there?" He asks worriedly.
I'm too exhausted to reassure him, and wipe my mouth with toilet paper before responding.
"Yeah, I just threw up. But I'm fine." I flush the toilet and try to stand.
"What?! Are you okay? Wait, can I come in?" Jungkook sounds panicked and if I wasn't feeling so deadbeat I would've laughed at his concern. Isn't it a normal thing to throw up after drinking?
"Yeah, sure. But I'm fine," I say, going to the sink and washing my hands.
He bursts in the room, changed from his leather jacket to his usual big tee and sweats for sleeping (like me).
"Hey, are you sure you're okay? Did you have too much to drink tonight?" Jungkook asks, feeling my forehead as I dry my hands.
Aw, that's so sweet.
"Thanks, Y/n, but I'm worried about you. Let's get you to bed. Are you ready?" Jungkook asks, and it takes me an embarrasingly long time to realize that I said that out loud. And that he asked me a question.
"Oh. Yeah, I'm mostly ready. I just need to brush my teeth and probably take some meds for the inevitable headache I'm going to have tomorrow," I think aloud.
"I can go get you some meds! You do anything else you need to to get ready, and I'll be right back." Jungkook's eyebrows are furrowed and he dashes out of the bathroom.
I hastily wipe my makeup off and wash my face. Then I use the bathroom. Jungkook still isn't back, and I wonder if he's okay.
Just as I'm about to go look for him, he reappears, flushed and with water bottle in hand with the medicine.
"Sorry, we had to open a new one," he apologizes, giving the pills and water to me.
I thank him and take the pills before getting my toothbrush.
Jungkook lingers in the bathroom, seemingly awkward.
I put the toothpaste on my toothbrush and ask him if he's okay.
"Yeah yeah, it's just. Um. DoyoucareifIbrushmyteethwithyou?" Jungkook avoids my eyes after he spits out that jumble of words.
I blink.
"Sure? I don't care. If you brush your teeth with me, that is." I hope I heard him right. I'm too tired to function and begin brushing my teeth.
Jungkook hesitantly gets his toothbrush and squirts his toothpaste, looking at me the whole time like I'm going to yell at him.
He starts brushing and becomes more visibly relaxed the more time goes on. I spit and rinse, then he does. The whole scene is disgustingly and hopelessly domestic. And I'm too tired to even feel nervous about that thought.
"Well, I'm going to go to bed," I say, heading towards my bedroom door. "Good night Jungkook."
I shut the bathroom door behind me and practically throw my glasses onto the nightstand before burrowing into my warm bed. I fall asleep instantly.
a/n: sorry this was mostly a filler chapter, but i do have the rest planned out! it will (per usual unfortunately..) take me a while to put them out, but i promise i have a plan. thanks for reading! 🩷😊
warnings: ❗️any characters in the story have nothing to do with their real life counterparts❗️f reader, reader with glasses, curse words, kinda panic attack? but not described in too much detail, mostly overthinking
*lmk if i missed any*
word count: ~5.4k
a/n: back from the dead!! the last chapter i wrote and uploaded was before i started uni and i literally did not have any time to write during the fall semester. my winter break was also hectic but i managed to finish this!! hope u enjoy xx
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The next day I rehearse my solo for the showcase, but only nail my eight turn combo half the time. Shit, what is wrong with me today? I think. Deep down I know the reason, and it's because I'm nervous. And I'm nervous because the boys are going to watch this performance tonight, so it has to go well.
I shake my head to clear my thoughts and run it one more time before Jimin gets here for our duet rehearsal.
Extend, twist, contract. Reach, prep...turn! I spot as hard as I can, tightening my abs and using my arms. Success! I stop gracefully and fluidly finish the rest of the dance easily.
The music stops and I hold my last pose for a moment before collapsing and taking a breath. I go to the edge of the stage to grab my water bottle and sit down to rest for a moment. And just in time, as the side door opens and Jimin walks in with his bag slung on his shoulder.
"Morning, Y/n!" He grins cheerfully and waves.
I wave back, still recovering from my solo.
"I'm really excited to see your solo, Y/n," Jimin says, coming to sit next to me. I must look like a wreck with my hair sticking to my neck and the sweat dripping down my body.
"Thanks, Jimin. I'm excited to see yours too!" It's true, both Jimin and Hobi have not let any of us see their dances and I'm dying to see them in action.
Jimin places his bag by my water bottle and sits down to stretch next to me, extending his right leg in a half split and reaching towards his foot.
We chat as he warms up, doing his splits and doing a few fan kicks and turns to fully warm up.
"Okay! I'm ready, let's do this," he says, reaching his hand out to me. I take it, now more than used to the skinship and intimate moves of the partner dance and focus on the technique and details of the lifts and such.
We get into our starting position, holding hands but turned away from each other and reaching our other arm towards our respective wings of the stage. Jimin gives the sound guy a thumbs up and he starts our music. The song Jimin chose when choreographing this was IU's version of the song "Autumn Morning," a beautiful piece that starts out with her singing acapella but transitions beautifully to a slow guitar accompanying her. It was perfect for the showcase.
We begin to dance together, the moves muscle memory as I extend and weave with Jimin while IU's voice projects out. I twirl and extend my leg into an arabesque as Jimin holds my waist, lifting me as I extend into a split in the air. He gently brings me down and we continue, twirling and leaping to our best ability. The final lift is coming up, and I internally brace myself. I do a fan kick with a forced arch with Jimin then turn and jump into his arms. He lifts me up as I pull my muscles taut, then he gently but powerfully tosses me into the air. I bend both of my knees and point my feet hard as I reach my right arm to the sky. ( https://pin.it/4id96qUND think this but in the air)
A smile ghosts my lips as I'm in the air, then I'm falling back into Jimin's waiting and safe arms. I arch my back as the last notes ring out and we fully extend to our ending pose. ( https://pin.it/4uHHo7vim )
We hold it for a few seconds before I exhale and try to catch my breath. Jimin lets me go and we walk over to our water bottles. I grab mine and give Jimin his and we both drink in silence for a couple moments. After I've thoroughly caught my breath I put my bottle down and say to a still drinking Jimin, "Well, that went pretty well."
He nods and finishes drinking, screwing the cap back on as he replies, "Yes, I agree. But, there was one part where I felt that I was a bit sloppy and that screwed you up, you know? That one section-"
"Where you twirled me. Yes, me too," I say, thinking about the section where Jimin didn't hold my hand tight enough so I wobbled a little at the end of my turn.
"Okay, glad we're on the same page. Should we go over it now?" He places his bottle down and looks at me expectantly. I nod and follow him to the middle of the stage.
If only he knew how hot he was when he was in dance mode. Always so specific and detailed with his review of himself and I, I can't help but feel warm when he focuses so much. And it doesn't help that he's sweating, and often wears thin shirts/tank tops when we practice. A girl can only take so much!
We practice and clean up that section before Jimin deems it good enough for tonight, and then we head out together, Jimin already having had his solo practice before mine.
The day passes by quickly. After eating lunch the boys and I decide to watch a movie before Jimin, Hobi, and I have to head to the auditorium again. After some arguing we decide on "The Avengers."
After the movie finishes, I stretch my arms as the maknaes argue whether or not Tom Hiddleston is hot. The hyungs don't get involved, but I swear I hear Jin say to Namjoon, "Villain or not, he is a good looking guy. Just not as good looking as me."
"Boys, are we really arguing over whether Tom Hiddleston is hot? It doesn't really matter," Namjoon says, exasperated. All three stop to look at him, eyes in disbelief.
"Of course it matters, hyung! Taste is important, and obviously anyone with taste would think he's hot." Jimin narrows his eyes pointedly at Jungkook, who rolls his eyes so hard I think he may have seen the back of his head.
"Hyung, I'm not saying he's not hot, but in this movie specifically he's not! I mean, he's the villain for fucks sake. I can't feel attracted to him because his character killed so many people!"
Taehyung scoffs, clearly on Jimin's side, then turns to me. "What do you think, Y/n? Is Tom HIddleston hot or not in 'The Avengers?'"
The room goes uncharacteristically quiet as all eyes turn to me. I gulp, as even the hyungs are paying attention.
"Uhh, I don't wanna get in the middle of any arguments that are happening, so, uh, no comment." I can tell that's not the answer they wanted, at the maknaes groan and even Yoongi shakes his head, faking disappointment.
"Geez! Why does it matter so much?" I ask, throwing my hands up. Obviously I think he's hot. I mean, he's Tom Hiddleston. And Loki is a morally grey character, making his tragic and misunderstood backstory all the more attractive. But I could never mention that to the boys.
"We just wanna know. Is he your type, Y/n? If so, what do you like about him?" Jimin grabs my arm before I can try to leave the room.
"Uhh, I like his acting. And him as an actor," I say, trying to wheedle my way out of answering the question. I don't like how Jimin is not letting go of my arm.
"That's not answering the question, Y/n," Taehyung says teasingly, shaking his finger.
I finally cave, ready to go up to my room and get dressed for the showcase, but mostly to get Jimin's unwanted touch off my arm.
"Fine!" I exclaim. "I think he's hot! Tom Hiddleston has always been and always will be hot, and Loki's a morally grey character so he's just misunderstood and not such a bad guy! And Tom Hiddleston being such a kind and sweet guy in real life makes him more attractive in both real life and his chacters that he plays!"
I catch my breath, and notice that Jimin's hand is off my arm and huff out a breath, my face flushed.
There's no noise from the boys as I wordlessly head upstairs, still annoyed about Jimin.
I go into my bathroom and lock both mine and Jungkook's door so no one can come in. I take a deep breath, trying to ground myself. Why do I feel shaky? I shouldn't care this much about Tom HIddleston, for heavens sake. But, the voice in the back of my head knows that it's not about Tom. It's about Jimin and his hold on my arm.
I grip the counter as I remember how he used to grab my arm to get my attention. Never enough to bruise, but enough to cause a little pain. He often would start yelling while holding me so I couldn’t eave and was forced to listen to him.
Huh. This is the first time I've thought about my ex in a while. I guess living with the boys and being so wrapped up in university and the arts week distracted me. It's funny how this is what makes me think of him. Just because I can't handle some touching.
I know Jimin didn't mean any harm, and that he would have let go had I asked. I can't believe I'm such a fool.
Distantly, I feel my legs buckle as I drop to the ground, but I ignore the feel of the cool tile beneath my legs and focus on my head.
Why did I believe that I was doing better? Why did I ever think that? I'm so stupid. And now he's even making me not be able to get ready. Get up, Y/n. You've got so many things to do. Like how you need to be getting ready for your dance showcase tonight! You have to be ready and show them and JImin that you're not a coward.
Oh god, I have to dance with Jimin. He's going to be so mad at me. I shouldn't have snapped at him. He's going to hate me. I can't dance with him. I need to pull our duet. But how can I tell him that? That I’m tired? That sounds stupid. Oh god. I think I just need to cancel all my dances. But what about my friends? I promised to support them. I can't disappoint them-
"Y/n!"
"Y/n! Open the door!"
Someone must be calling me. I look up, vision blurry and oh my cheeks are wet.
"Y/n! Can you hear me? Are you okay?" A voice comes from Jungkook's bathroom door.
"Do you think something happened hyung?" "We didn't mean to make her upset!" "Should we break down the door?" "Don't be ridiculous, Jimin."
I jolt.
"Y/n! Please, open the door!" I now know it's Yoongi at the door, and the plea in his voice makes me sick. I scramble off the floor and hastily unlock Jungkook's door. I open it and there's Yoongi. I've never seen him so distressed.
He wraps his arms around me and breaths a sigh of what I think is relief.
"Thank god, Y/n. Are you okay? We were so worried after you ran off downstairs." He's still hugging me, and after a moment I pull my arms around him and hug him back.
Hugging Yoongi feels right. It feels like being able to be vulerable and honest and raw, like talking with someone you fully trust and are open with. It just feels right.
The rest of the boys crowd my vision, especially Jimin.
"Y/n, I am so sorry. Are you okay? I didn't mean to make you upset." His eyes are wide and shiny, and are those tears shining in them?
"It's okay, Jimin.” I try to reassure him, knowing it's not his fault that I got upset. I should’ve not snapped at anything of them like that.
"No, it's not. I clearly upset you," Jimin says, pursing his lips. "Again, I'm so sorry Y/n. If you want to tell me what happened you can, but I'm not going to force you."
I sigh, and lean back a little, signaling to Yoongi to unhook his arms around me. But he still holds my hand, a gesture so tender I could cry.
"No, it's okay, Jimin. I'm sorry for snapping at you and running off. Everything's fine," I say, avoiding all their eyes.
"Are you sure? And there's no need to apologize," says Jimin, eyebrows creased in worry still.
"Yes, I'm sure. I'm just a little stressed about the showcase tonight," I lie, coming up with the easiest excuse at the moment.
"Okay. If there's anything you wanna tell us, please feel free to," Namjoon says seriously, looking deep into my eyes. I feel like he can tell that I'm lying, but he doesn't say any more.
"I will." I won't, but I have to pretend that everything is fine. Because it will be. Hopefully, eventually. But for now I have to focus on the dance showcase and getting ready. I'm going to be late, but hopefully not much depending on how fast I get ready.
I go into the bathroom and lock Jungkook's door again. Then I pull out my makeup bag and get started.
~
After speed running my makeup (I can add finishing touches when I get there) I hurriedly curl my hair (again, can add touch ups when I get there) and change into my solo outfit, a simple black flowy number that has mesh that swirls around me when I dance and shows off the lines of my arms and legs.
I double check my bag and leave my room, hurrying downstairs. Shit shit shit. It's already 3:50 and I haven't even left yet. I’m not making it on time.
At the bottom of the stairs I toe on my shoes and ask Jin, who's also waiting there, "Hey, I'm gonna take the bus unless everyone's ready now so I'll see you later, Jin-"
"It's okay, honey. I'm driving you, so let's go now so that you aren't too late."
I give him a confused look. "But don't we have to wait for everyone else? Jimin and Hobi also have to be there the same time as me so shouldn't we at least wait for them?"
"Nope." Jin hands me my water bottle and ushers me out the door as I sputter.
"But Jin-"
"Not another word, sweet girl. It's kind of you to worry about them, but they're not your responsibility. They can drive together when they're ready, or with the rest of the boys. My job is to get you, and only you, there safely and hopefully on time."
We're in the car by now as Jin had taken my bag off my arm and put it on the backseat as I distractedly got into the passenger seat and buckled up.
"Okay. But I'm still worried Jimin and Hobi won't get there on time. I mean, they're earlier in the program than me and I don't want the directors becoming worried because they're not there." Is this really a good idea?
"Honey, don't worry about them. I promise, they were almost ready when we left but they also wanted to drive separately because they might get food before they go."
Food before dancing? That doesn't sound like a good idea to me. Snacks, maybe, but not a full fledged meal.
"Your job is to not worry about them and to focus on your dancing. We are all so excited to see your solo, sweet girl," Jin says, speeding down the road. He's not going too over the limit, so I find myself relaxing a little in the plush seat.
"Okay," I murmer, recalling my choreography and what I need to do to finish getting ready when I get there.
We make it to the auditorium in good time, with it only being 4:03 when I start walking in.
"Break a leg! We'll see you later!" Jin calls as he pulls away. I wave and hurry into the lobby, beelining downstairs to where the dressing rooms are.
I hastily set my bag down and hang up my duet costume so it doesn't get wrinkled. Then I plug in my curling iron. I only have until 4:30 to finish getting ready. Then, at 4:30, all the dancers warm up together on stage until about 5. House doors open at 5:30, giving everyone half an hour to clean any dance sections they need to before we dancers are banished to the basement and dressing rooms until it's our turn to dance.
As I wait for the curling iron to heat up, I put the finishing touches up on my makeup. Because of my glasses, I have to apply a very heavy amount of eyeshadow and liner, so I quickly blend my smokey eye and add some winged eyeliner.
"Hey girl, glad you made it," Hwasa says, leaning in the doorway of our dressing room. It's just us and Momo in the room, but she’s a senior dancer so she's probably upstairs getting a head start on stretching.
"Me too, but barely," I say, leaning close to the mirror to check my eye makeup. Pretty good for someone who was just crying earlier.
“Is everything okay? I haven’t heard from you in a while. Me, Jackson, and Felix are worried about you.” Hwasa pauses, brows furrowed in worry.
I didn’t mean to worry them. My life’s just been so hectic lately because of the prep for arts week. I tell Hwasa this, and that I’m sorry I couldn’t hang out as much.
“It’s okay girl, I get it. Just let me know if you ever need anything,” she says, giving me a quick hug. I thank her, and with one last look in the mirror, we head upstairs to stretch.
As I catch up with Hwasa while stretching, I wave to Jimin and Hobi, who are sitting across the stage with their respective groups.
Hwasa waggles her eyebrows. “Ooh, finally making some progress?” She asks suggestively.
I blush and smack her on the shoulder. “Stop! Oh my god, there are people around!” I hiss, looking around to make sure no one heard.
She rolls her eye playfully. “Girl, no one’s listening, I promise. But, you didn't answer my question. Did you finally makes some progress on operation bangtan baddies?”
I laugh. “Bangtan baddies? Really, Hwasa? That’s all you could come up with?”
“Jackson came up with it,” she deadpans.
We dissolve into a fit of giggles, pre show nerves catching up to us. I thankfully don’t have to answer the question as our director starts talking after that.
~
We’re dismissed and given the half an hour call until house opens and we’re banished downstairs until a few dances before ours.
“Do you have anything you need to clean?” Hwasa asks, standing up and stretching her arms.
“No, but I do need to have a quick chat with Jimin before we go downstairs about our duet,” I say, knowing that I won’t be able to see him until right before our duet because he’s doing so many numbers. He has his contemporary solo, contemporary group, and hip hop group number with Hobi.
“Okay. Break a leg! And I don’t just mean on stage.” Hwasa winks and heads downstairs and I make a beeline for Jimin.
“Hey, Jimin,” I say, approaching him where he’s amid his contemporary dance group.
He turns, giving me that smile that makes his cheeks look so squishy.
“Hey Y/n! Did you have anything you wanted to go over?” He asks, as his dance group bids him goodbye and heads to their side of the wings.
“No, I just wanted to check in with you before our duo, and I know you’re busy until then,” I say, not knowing for sure what I’m trying to say. Maybe it’s nerves talking, but I really don’t want to mess up our duet.
“Okay! Thanks for checking in. I think that we’re gonna do great! Let’s just do our best, and whatever happens happens. I got your back and I know you’ve got mine,” he says, pumping his fist in a ‘fighting’ motion.
We part ways, me heading downstairs and Jimin to the wings. I grab a drink from my dressing room and chat and catch up with Hwasa until the showcase begins.
Hwasa and I head to the main viewing area outside the dressing room where there's a tv set up so we can watch everyone's performances. Jimin and Hobi do amazing in all their group and solo performances. Jimin looks like an angel during his solo (imagine 2019 mma jimin solo dance..) and Hobi lights up the entire stage with his solo (watch literally any solo hiphop number by hobi..).
I'm so focused on their numbers I don't notice Hwasa poking me until she finally says my name.
"Huh?" I say, turning my attention away from the tv. Hwasa is giving me a look and finally points upstairs. Shit, it’s already time for my solo? I look at the tv and then stand up abruptly before going to do one last mirror check in the dressing room. Then I head upstairs as Hwasa wishes me good luck with a flying kiss.
I reach the dark wings and take a deep breath, going over my solo in my head. Both Jimin and Hobi are downstairs changing so I stand next to Momo in the wings, as her solo is two before mine.
Mina finishes her solo and we all enthusaticially applaud as she comes offstage, immediately beelining for the dressing rooms to change.
Momo goes onstage next, and while I should be focusing on running my solo in my head, I can't help but watch her. Everyone is. She's one of, if not the best dancers we have, and I know our director will be disappointed when she graduates in the spring.
Momo finishes her solo and I break out of the trance I was in while watching her, applauding loud as she comes offstage, sweaty but smiling.
She bows her head to us as she heads downstairs, and I laser in on preparing myself for my solo while Dino performs his.
Prep, turn. Prep, turn. Prep, turn. I do a couple triples backstage to warm myself up for the eight-flouette combo in my solo.
Dino finishes his solo and the lights dim. He comes off and I walk on and get into my beginning position. It's time to do what I love.
The music begins and I confidently start dancing. This is what I love, my passion hobby. Contemporary dance gives me the chance to show off my extensions and emotions. My turn sequence approaches, and I focus in.
Extend, twist, contract. Reach, prep...turn. I spot hard and tighten my core. Seven, eight! I successfully land them and finish my solo. As I extend my arm in my ending pose, I blink and the audience applause catches up to my ears. I hope the boys liked my solo.
The lights dim and I walk offstage, feeling proud as other fellow dancers compliment me. I bow my head and say thank you, and head downstairs to my dressing room where Hwasa gives me a huge hug.
"I'm so proud of you, girl! You did amazing," she says as I shut the door and start to change into Jimin and I's duet costume. It's the opposite of my solo costume; white with flowy sleeves and delicate layers that shimmer when I move under the light.
"Thank you! I'm sure you're going to do great too," I say, done changing but sit to do my makeup change. I wipe the dark makeup off my eyes and change it to a shimmery white eyeshadow that blends into a soft pink. When I'm done touching up my lipstick, Hwasa remarks, "I can't wait to see you and Jimin's duet. I bet it's so smexy." She waggles her eyebrows and I laugh despite myself, checking the dance number we're on.
"Sure, Hwasa. We're dancing to IU's cover of Autumn Morning, an acoustic and slow song. SO 'smexy' as you said." I stand and jerk my head towards the door. "Also, we should probably head upstairs. Your solo is soon and my 'smexy' duet with Jimin is also."
Hwasa just grins and we head upstairs back to the familiar wings.
Hoseok's hiphop group is finishing their performance, and while I could only catch the end of it, my eyes are immediately drawn to him. He moves so smooth yet sharp at the same time, and the smirk on his face makes mine heat up. Wow, he's really hot, I think unhelpfully.
"Damn, I always forget your man can dance," Hwasa whispers next to me as they pose and the lights dim.
I turn my head to respond but they're already coming offstage so I just grin and mouth "amazing job" to all the dancers. Hobi gives me a finger heart and smiles, the opposite of the hot dance machine I just saw on stage.
"Girl, you gotta believe me when I say they like you," Hwasa whispers as they head downstairs.
I stare at the door Hobi just exited, not comprehending what she said. "Huh, what?"
Hwasa laughs. "Never mind. It's clear you like them too."
I turn my heads towards her and give her a deadpan stare. "Shouldn't you be focusing on your solo? You're almost up," I whisper.
Hwasa shrugs but starts to run through it in her head.
Two more dances pass and soon enough Hwasa goes onstage to perform her solo. She performs amazing, just like I knew she would. Her confidence and sharp body moments draw the eye and I cheer and clap loudly for her as she comes offstage.
"You did so good!" I whisper in her ear, side hugging her proudly. She grins and thanks me before grabbing her water bottle and chugging it.
"Okay girl, now that I'm done I can't wait to watch you and Jimin's duet," she whispers, making my heart thump. I thought I was prepared for this, but now that there's only two more dances until our duet I start to feel the nerves creep in.
"Thanks," I whisper back, mentally running through the dance in my head. Since Jimin starts on the opposite side of the stage, I can't discuss anything with him before we go on. But I trust him. The question is, do I trust myself?
Irene and Seulgi finish their duet and Mina goes on to perform her solo. Jimin and I's duet is after. I position myself closer to the edge of the wings and spot Jimin on the other side. He gives me a thumbs up and a smile, which I hesitantly return. Oh god, I can't mess this up, especially with all the boys watching.
"We got this," he mouths, nodding his head. I make a heart with my hand in response.
Mina finishes, posing gracefully as the lights dim and the audience applauds.
Jimin and I walk onstage and melt into our beginning pose. The lights fade on, hot and bright, but Jimin's hand is cool as I hold it. IU's beautiful voice rings out.
Then we dance.
My nerves disappear as Jimin and I do the thing we love. We extend and turn and leap in tandem, two halves coming together to be whole. I never knew that I could dance so well with a partner. It's like a piece of my dance puzzle is intertwined with Jimin’s whenever we move together.
I can't help but soft smile the entire time as I turn and extend my leg into an arabesque, just like rehearsal. Jimin holds my waist as I extend fully, and his hands are firm and trusting as he lifts me. I point my toes hard as I extend into the full split.
We continue, euphoria taking over me with every step and extenstion. The final lift approaches for the last time, and as we do our fan kick I notice out of the corner of my eye Jimin soft smiling at me. His eyes are scrunched up slightly and I do a slight nod, as if to assure him we can do this one last time.
So I turn and jump into Jimin's waiting arms for the last time. He casts me into the air and I feel like I'm flying. I reach towards the bright lights with my head up and think about how this is what it feels like to be with the boys. Free and cathartic, yet I'm still yearning for more. I want more. But it's just barely out of reach.
I land safely into Jimin's arms and we finish the dance. The lights dim on us and the audience applause suddenly hits my ears like an ocean wave.
Jimin and I walk offstage and before I can compliment him, he wraps his arms around me. I freeze for a moment before hesitantly wrapping my arms around him. We're both sweaty but I can't find it in myself to care.
After a couple moments Jimin pulls back, whispering in my ear, "I'm sorry about earlier at the house."
Our faces are mere inches apart as I reply, "There's nothing to be sorry about."
He looks like he wants to say more but only nods, his face tight.
~
After the showcase is over Jimin, Hobi, and I grab our stuff and head upstairs together. The lobby is packed with people, and Jimin grabs my hand and starts leading me through the crowd. I look back briefly at Hobi and hold my hand out. He takes it, grinning, and we walk through the crowded lobby like a three person train.
I finally spot the boys gathered by a poster for the fall play and nudge Jimin towards that general direction. He gets the memo and starts walking even faster that Hobi and I can barely keep up and I feel like I'm being dragged.
"Our three dancers!" Namjoon says, his dimples popping. Yoongi, Taehyung, and Jungkook are all holding a giant bouquet of flowers.
"For Hobi-hyung!" Jungkook hands him the bouquet he's holding; one bursting with pretty pink-purple orchids. Hobi grins and takes it, smelling it and wrapping an arm around the younger man.
"For my one and only Jimin," Taehyung says, presenting his bouquet of white roses to Jimin dramatically. Of course, Jimin takes it and holds it against his chest like the drama queen he is.
"I guess we're doing it this way," Yoongi grumbles, and holds out his bouquet to me. "For you, Y/n."
I take the bouquet that houses gorgeous pink camellias.
"Thank you, Yoongi," I say. "You really didn't have to."
He scoffs but holds back a smile. "Did you really think we would get the other two bouquets and not you?"
I can only shrug and smile, but I see him watching me as I gently sniff the delicate petals.
"Can we talk for a sec about you and Jimin's duo?" Hobi says as we head to the car. "You two executed that choreography like it was nothing! I was so impressed."
"Aw, thank you Hobi," I say.
"Yeah, thank you. It was definitely mostly Y/n though," Jimin says.
I protest as I get into the passenger seat. "No! You literally choreographed the dance, Park Jimin, so don't say that. It was a team effort."
Jimin rolls his eyes as he buckles his seatbelt but lets it go.
"Oh my god, I just wanted to say that your solo was absolutely breathtaking, Y/n," Jungkook says from the back row.
The rest of the boys echo his sentiments and I blush, hoping the dark and my bouquet can hide my cheeks.
"Aw, thank you guys," I say, turning around to give them all a heart. "Jimin and Hobi also did absolutely incredible with their solos too."
We laugh and chat happily as Jin navigates the drive home smoothly.
I go to bed exhausted but happy that night. The arts showcase was a stressful yet rewarding week, but I'm ready to go back my normal classes and schedule.
a/n: arts showcase week is finally over! that took me a while to write all of the chapters but i am satisfied and happy that the story will be progressing more now. thank you for reading! 🤍
*also bts tour dates dropped..as a midwest girl i unfortunately will probably not be able to go see them as every location is so very far from where i live 😔 😭 but to those who are going to face the ticket bloodbath, good luck! i’ll be cheering for you 💜
guys ik i have not been on here in forever but can u guys help me find a fic/author??
the account username was smth like 'jellyfysh' and it was side blog!!!
the story i loved from there was titled 'getting back in the swing of things' (author shortened it to gbist i think..)
reader x bts ot7...reader was namjoon's ex i believe and came to stay with ot7 because she was desperate and ended up falling for ot7
i have a sneaking suspicion the author deleted their side blog because i used to follow them..which makes me sad because i loved this story, so even confirmation of that would help 😭
or if yall could find their main blog too 😭😭idk i just loved their story sm omg
tldr: any help/info about the author would be amazing!!!! thank you!!!
plot | that time on tour where popstar tries to understand how her bassist can be on willpower.
w.c | 3.8k
pairing | bass guitarist!yoongi x popstar!reader
genre | fluff, humor, enemies to lovers, slow burn
note | something's happening!! i really enjoyed writing this, just giggling the whole time haha!
main masterlist | series masterlist
This is torture.
Whoever thought of styling your bassist in a very tasteful way shall be brought in front of you, just so you can scream to their face for an hour straight. Yoongi stood out amidst the most basic outfit one could think of: a black shirt, a black leather jacket, and ripped, baggy jeans. He looks like a real rockstar. Your eyes travelled down the silver rings in his fingers, unconsciously biting your lower lip hard. It’s crazy, you can even hear your own breathing.
“YN, please stop checking him out.”
You heard Cal’s worn-out voice next to you, but that didn’t stop you from staring. At this point, you can just admit that you’re being shameless, staring heavily at your bassist, who’s in the middle of doing a photoshoot with the rest of the band. You sat on the makeup chair, your look was already done, and you were just waiting for the go-signal to join them.
The photoshoot is for a Singaporean cover of a certain magazine. Of course, you would be in the cover. But the team also wants to feature your live band that has been making waves online with every show.
Cal sighed after seeing that you resumed your most recent recreational activity since the time you and Yoongi talked privately for fifteen minutes in your dressing room. The one where Noah bet that you two fucked. Like an old sister, she cupped your cheeks, making your lips pucker, to make you turn your head to her.
“You should stop, really. You look like you’re already stripping him off in your head,” she whispered to make sure no staff would hear it.
“Well, I hope he can feel that,” you shrugged off.
Your manager’s brows scrunched together, “What?”
You didn’t say anything. Instead, she noticed you again watching Yoongi heavily. You even licked your lips and swallowed a lump in your throat as he posed in front of the camera.
“That’s it,” Cal took your wrist and pulled you with her in the private dressing room, away from present ears. “What the fuck is going on, YN? What happened that night?!”
You looked at her and exhaled, “Nothing!”
“Nothing? Your nose is flaring,” she states, mentioning that one quirk you do when you’re lying. “I won’t let you out if you won’t tell me anything– or at least, something. Because by the way you are embarrassingly acting right–”
“Nothing, Callie! That’s the problem. Nothing happened– nothing is happening!” you stomped your foot like a bratty kid who cannot have her favorite candy.
Cal places her hands on her hips, looking at you like a helpless case. For a second, she scanned you to guess what went on with that “talk” with Yoongi. But she is so tired of guessing and predicting between you and your bassist, she just said,
“Okay, tell me what happened that night.”
“Fifteen minutes, Cal. Yoongi and I have to talk about something.”
You didn’t wait for a reply. Instead, you took Yoongi’s wrist and pulled him with you to the nearest door, your dressing room. He dumbfoundedly followed you, while everyone’s heads turned in your direction, as it was a rare sight. You clicked the lock, ensuring you and Yoongi would have the privacy you both needed.
No one spoke immediately. Instead, when you turned around after locking the door, you see Yoongi simply looking at you with his hands shoved in his pockets. The only sound that can be heard is the noise of the people outside your dressing room. You can hear Noah saying something that made some people laugh, but it’s not really audible. Yoongi didn’t really move, frozen on the spot, waiting for you to say something. It’s frustrating.
“What the hell is your problem, Yoongi?” you sighed, crossing your arms over your chest.
He shrugged, “I don’t know, you tell me, YN. You’re the one who pulled me here.”
It was like him popping Mentos in a bottle of soda. Your heels clicked on the ground as you stepped forward, “You are fucking confusing me.”
You see his Adam’s apple bob up and down. You continued, “You were the one who made it clear that I should stay away when I tried to talk to you, which I did by the way. Even when we are doing songs together, I try to have another person present just to not make things too awkward for us. And now, you can just come up to me before the show to check on me? ”
You noticed how his stare got sharper as you ended your sentence. He licked his lips before speaking, “But you were the first one who made it clear that we’re just co-workers who fucking flirts a lot, YN. I was the first one who tried to talk to you, and you pushed me away, which hurts me, by the way. And I’m sorry that I did the same thing. I acted cold and pushed you away, too. I’m sorry. But for Pete’s sake, YN, I really didn’t like how I was thinking about you so much because you didn’t show up the whole day.”
It’s your turn to stay quiet now, Yoongi took the lead. For the first time, the elephant that has followed you and your bassist in every room you’re in together is going to be addressed. That fucking elephant is probably tired from following you two from the United States to different Asian countries.
“Look, YN. I–” he paused, sighing, “I like you… A lot. Somehow, in between the childish fights and late-night song-making, I found a reason to–”
“Yoongi,” you called his name, voice a bit deeper. Like you were trying to regain control of the situation.
“What?” he looked at you expectantly, ready to hear you out even though you had interrupted him. But nothing came out of your lips.
Instead, you took three sharp steps, closing the gap between you two. You grabbed the lapels of his jacket and dragged him down before he could even process it. The moment your lips crashed onto his, it was rough, like you two were making up for lost time. All the pent-up anger, frustration, and desire were revealed all at once. His lips were as warm as the last time you felt them. Impatient, you softly bite his lip, making his breath hitch.
When he finally caught up, you felt Yoongi’s hands find your waist. He wanted to take control like before in your hotel room. But not today, you thought. Your palms spread over his chest. Then to his jaw and cheeks. It got sloppier and deeper with your uneven rhythm. You walked him backwards until he stumbled down to the couch.
Yoongi barely had a second to steady himself before you followed, straddling his lap, lips already finding his again. This time, it has gotten more desperate. Your mouths kept missing and finding each other, breaths mixing. Your fingers threaded through his hair. The moment you grip it, you can feel the vibration on his chest and lips. The low groan instant made you grip harder.
His hands moved again, firmer this time, holding the curve of your waist as you were moving too much. Basically, feeling him up. You pulled away when you felt him squeezing your waist harder. Catching your breath, you dumbfoundedly looked down at him.
“Yoongi,” you breathlessly called his name. He looked dazed himself, your lip gloss all over his swollen lips. “I like you too. You know that, right?”
“Mhm.” he nods, looking up at you with the stars in his eyes.
A small smile made its way to your lips, and he smiled back. He held your cheeks softly before pulling you in for another kiss. This time, it was slower. Less rushed than the one earlier. It was soft and gentle. It was the kind of kiss that slowed down your quickened heartbeat. Your hands rest on his shoulders, feeling him relax under your touch. Slowly, your lips trail kisses from his lips to his jaw and down to his neck.
“YN–”
His voice cracked halfway through your name, low and warning, but it only made you smile against his skin. You felt his pulse jump beneath your lips as you pressed another kiss, softer this time, right where his jaw met his neck. Your hands began to travel down, and when you got a touch of the cold metal of his belt, you felt Yoongi gripping your waist as if to stop you.
“Wait,” he whispered, exhaling sharply. You could hear the restraint in his tone, obviously trying to hold himself together. “I don’t think we should do this here—”
“Oh, yeah, yeah,” you immediately agreed, giggling. “We can go straight back to my room while everyone is partying–”
“No, I mean, I was thinking…” You tilted your head, still straddling him. Your heart pounded against his. His hands were still on your waist, just to hold you in place. “…maybe we should take things slow.”
You blinked, lips gaping, because surely you misheard that. Slow? You almost laughed, but then you saw the way he was looking at you with sincere conviction.
“Yoongi,” you breathed out, almost unbelieving, “you know that we were literally dry-humping just seconds ago, right?”
A small chuckle escaped him, breathless but amused. “Yeah, I noticed.” His thumb brushed your waist in slow, absentminded circles, a habit of his that you are starting to notice.
“Then why—”
“Because if we don’t stop now, I won’t.” His voice was firmer this time, quiet but sure. “And I don’t want the first real thing to happen before I even took you out for a date.”
You stared at him, chest rising and falling as you tried to process what he just said. His hands were still firm on your waist, thumbs drawing idle circles on your skin like he was trying to calm both of you down. It’s sweet. He’s being sweet, it makes your heart throb. But there are a lot more things throbbing than your heart now.
“So, you want to take things slow?” you repeated, quietly hoping for a very small false confirmation. “Are you serious?”
Yoongi’s mouth curved into a soft smile as he tucked a stray strand of your hair behind your ear. “I’m always serious with you.”
You didn’t know what to say to that. So you just stared at him. His hair was a mess because of you. His lip gloss-slicked mouth because of you. His pupils, dark and blown wide, definitely because of you.
And still, he wanted to wait.
You both sat there for a while — your knees still bracketing his hips, your fingers still tangled in his shirt. The world outside was still loud, still moving, but in that tiny dressing room, it was just the two of you trying to catch your breath and your sanity. You swallowed hard, still straddling him,
“You’re gonna drive me insane, aren’t you?” you said, voice breathy, somewhere between a laugh and a groan.
Yoongi’s smile deepened just a little, enough to show that hint of smugness he can’t quite hide. “Yeah,”
Laughing, you playfully hit him on his chest. He laughed too, catching your hands. You turned your head down, wordlessly admitting your defeat. You felt him softly kiss your knuckles before letting go and holding your chin to make you meet his eyes.
His eyes darted briefly to your lips again, like he couldn’t help himself. “One more?” he asked quietly.
You didn’t answer. You just leaned in. This kiss was soft. Just slow, deliberate movements, the kind that sends assurance to you. His lips brushed against yours in gentle intervals, softer each time, until it felt like breathing. You could do it all day, you won’t mind.
And when you finally pulled away, you rested your forehead against his, whispering, “This is already driving me insane.”
“Yeah,” he breathed out with a lazy smile. “Me too.”
“I think I’m way past insane, Cal.” you told your manager, nails almost gripping your already-styled hair, “It’s only been three days and ooh… the things that I want to do to him–”
“Please spare me the details, YN,” she cuts you off with a grimace. “It’s only been three days and you’re acting like you’re in withdrawal.”
“Because I am! I don’t think I can be celibate with him around, Callie,” you desperately told her, hiding your face in your palms.
You hear her laugh as she softly removes your wrist away from your face, “I don’t think it can be called celibacy if it’s only been three days, hon.”
You glared at her, making her laugh even more, “Cal, he is such a gentleman. It’s so hot.”
Your manager blinked. “You’re complaining that he’s hot for respecting your boundaries?”
“Yes!” you exclaimed, hands thrown up. “Like, who does that? Who kisses you like that and then says, ‘let’s take it slow’? He ruined my entire sleep schedule, Callie. I close my eyes and I see him saying that with his stupid, calm face! I even had to check if I’m ovulating because what the fuck?!”
The day after that night in Manila, you flew here to Singapore for your next show. For your “first” date, you visited an art museum and a botanical garden. The rest of the band came too to avoid suspicion, and Cal won’t let you two go alone. Although you haven’t told them yet about your new situation with each other, the band knew better and let you wander around the same area alone. You learned that Yoongi likes photography too. He often took pictures of you with his own camera during the ‘date’. He also never let you bring out your wallet when you tried various local foods. You don’t even have to say anything because he literally buys things you just look at a little bit longer.
Callie snorted, shaking her head. “You’re in trouble.”
“I know.” You groaned, flopping back in your chair. “He’s all... patient and thoughtful and—ugh.”
“What are you up to?”
Noah watched from your bed as you dried your hair in the bathroom. He can easily see you since you left the door open, so you can chat easily while you get ready. After the photoshoot earlier, your best friend decided to join you in your hotel room just to chill.
“Nothing, Yoongi’s coming. We’ll try to produce and record the first demo for the lyrics I showed you earlier,” you explained while running your hair through your airwrap.
“And you’re wearing that?”
You looked at him through the open doorway. “What do you mean by that? I’m in my robe, my pajamas are underneath.”
“Girl, I can see the strap of your quote-unquote pajamas,” Noah said, deadpan, scrolling on his phone in his hands. “And all can say is that thing is thinner than spaghetti. How subtle, my love.”
You rolled your eyes. “It’s hot in here.”
“It’s hot because you want it to be hot. You are literally in the greatest room in this hotel, you have the control of your air conditioner,” he shot back. “Don’t act innocent.”
You pretended to ignore him, unplugging the airwrap and tousling your hair in the mirror. You reached for the small tube of strawberry lip gloss near the sink, applying it to your lips. You popped your lips together before speaking, “You’re ridiculous.”
“I’m ridiculous? You’re literally blow-drying your hair like it’s a date,” he teased, getting up from your bed, just to lean on your bathroom doorway.
“It’s not a date,” you said, though your tone wavered a little, squinting at him.
Noah hummed knowingly. “Right. You just happened to do your hair, your lip gloss, and your silver silk satin top and cami shorts are for a totally professional session with the guy you fucked in your dressing room days ago.”
“You know, that’s not true. I’ll sue you if that rumor reaches the media.” You grabbed your phone and glanced at the clock. “He’s coming in five.”
“Five minutes?”
You nodded.
Noah sighed dramatically, “Alright, I’m leaving before I have to hear you two turn song lyrics into foreplay.”
“Out!” you pointed toward the door, laughing despite yourself.
He grabbed his keys and muttered, “Just don’t blame me when your ‘demo’ ends up being six minutes of heavy breathing.”
You rolled your eyes as he left, but your stomach twisted just a little. Because five minutes suddenly didn’t feel like enough time to calm the hell down. You unwrapped your robe, hanging it behind the bathroom door. You took one last glance in the mirror, checking yourself out.
Maybe you shouldn’t have picked this set. It’s too… slutty? Maybe you are being too obvious. You hate to admit it, but yeah, you look like you’re trying. Still, you tugged at the hem of your shorts, tried to convince yourself you weren’t overdressed for a “work session.” You were even wearing perfume, even though you’re just doing the work in your room.
Suddenly, a knock came, three light taps.
You froze for half a second before forcing your voice out. “It’s open!”
You walked out of the bathroom just when Yoongi stepped in. His laptop bag was over his shoulder, hair slightly damp like he’d showered right before coming over. He looked comfortable in his casual clothes: plain white shirt, grey sweats, silver chain with the charm hiding underneath his shirt.. Effortless. Annoyingly effortless.
“Hey,” he greeted softly.
“Hey,” you replied, pretending to be busy yourself with cleaning up the desk he would put his stuff on. You could feel his eyes scan the room before his gaze landed on you. Briefly. Too brief for your liking..
It was like he didn’t even notice your look or what you were wearing. Not even a blink or a quirk on his lips. He just took his seat by the desk, opening his laptop like nothing about this situation was tense. You watched him behind as he set up.
“Let’s go over the melody again?” he said casually, like he was so ready to work.
“Okay,” You nodded with slumped shoulders, sitting beside him where the mic was set. The space between your chairs felt tiny, even though it was probably three feet in between. You could hear his quiet breaths, the soft clicks of his mouse, and the faint hum he made when thinking. You could only wish you could be as calm as he is.
Ten minutes in, you've already lost focus. You were supposed to be recording the said demo, but you kept messing up the lyrics you wrote and were reading from your own phone. Your tongue is like struggling to function at the moment. But, Yoongi is patient and just gives you a thumbs up whenever you apologize.
The only rhythm you could follow now was his fingers tapping the desk or your heartbeat trying to keep up. By the fourth time you are recording, you accidentally said bees instead of please. Your vocals were a little shaky, too. Yoongi glanced at you then,
“You okay?” he asked.
“Yeah, just… hot,” you said, reaching for your bottled water on the desk.
He nodded, though you caught the flicker in his gaze before he turned back to the screen, “How about I’ll clean up this melody first. Then you can have a five-minute break. Is that okay?”
“Yeah, sounds great.” You forced a smile before removing your headphones to stand up.
The air in your room felt suffocating for you. So, you decided to open the door to your balcony and let the fresh breeze come in. You stood in the doorway just to quietly inhale the air, hopefully to knock some sense into you. You’re drowning with these feelings, and Yoongi is probably chilling behind you. You can hear his little noise: his throat clearing, small sighs, and small movements on his chair. And he is so fine– so okay, you want to know how.
Finally, you couldn’t take it anymore.
“Yoongi,” you said, your voice sharper than intended. You turned around to see him already looking at you.
“Yeah?”
“How do you—” you started, then stopped, shaking your head. “How do you act so normal?”
You feel pathetic, asking that question. Like, are you really this desperate? You asked yourself.
His brows pulled together. “Normal?”
“Yeah,” you said, gesturing vaguely between the two of you. “You’re just… calm and collected. Being so mature with all of this. Like this doesn’t mess with you at all.”
He blinked slowly, confusion and amusement drawn across his face. “You think I’m calm?”
“You’re literally so focused on working like we’re not sitting very closely with each other!” you snapped, your frustration cracking through your restraint. “Do you not find me attractive, or are you just immune to… this?”
That last word came out soft. Small. Maybe a little insecure. You had the same feeling you have when you were in middle school, where everyone is getting Valentine’s Day candy except you. With shame growing inside of you, you turned away again, hiding your frown from him. You feel so stupid and childish for feeling as such around him.
Behind you. Yoongi’s lips parted. His expression was unreadable for a second. Then you heard him push his chair back slightly, enough to turn toward you.
“You really think that?” he spoke, voice lower, behind you. Like he is a strong coming.
You swallowed hard, still not looking around. “It just feels that way.”
For a moment, it just silenced.. Then, there is another cool blast of air again that makes you hug yourself. But slowly, you felt some familiar arms wrapped around your waist. You can instantly feel his warmth from his touch.
“You have no idea how hard it is to act normal around you.”
Your breath hitched, not just from his confession. But with how warm his breath is next to your ear. His chin almost rests on your bare shoulders.
“I can’t look at you too long without losing focus,” he continued, thumb tracing circles over the silk fabric on your waist. “I can’t even breathe right when you wear things like this.”
Your heart stuttered. His words hit lower than they should’ve. Then, before you could say anything, his lips brushed your shoulder. Barely. Like a ghost of a touch. But it was enough to make your skin erupt in goosebumps.
He lingered, breath warm. Then another soft kiss, higher this time, right where your neck met your shoulder.
“Yoongi…” you whispered, but it came out as a plea, not a warning.
He hummed against your skin, the sound low and vibrating. “You wonder how I’m so strong,” he murmured, his breath fanning your jaw. “Truth is, I’m not.”
You could feel the smile against your skin before he whispered again, slower:
“I just really, really don’t want to mess this up.”
His hand slid from your shoulder down to your wrist, squeezing gently like an anchor. He pressed one last kiss on your shoulder before pulling back.
warnings: ❗️any characters in the story have nothing to do with their real life counterparts❗️f reader, reader with glasses, curse words, fluffy moments 😋
*lmk if i missed any*
word count: ~3.7k
a/n: enjoy! 🫶🏼
……………………………………………………………………………………………………………
I dust blush on my cheeks and hastily check my hair one more time. Groaning, I realize I need to put on my heels, and I find them (still in their box) on the floor of my closet.
"Come on, you stupid things," I grumble, cursing my past self for choosing higher heels than what I normally would go for.
"Y/n! You almost ready?" Hobi calls, and I do one more mirror check before I holler back, "Yes! I'm coming!"
The fall concert is tonight, and I have to arrive there an hour early, so all the boys are also getting there early, despire my protests because the doors don't even open to the public until thirty minutes before the show.
I grab my purse and phone, spotting Jimin and Tae's ring twinkling in the light, and without much thought, grab it and slip it on. Then I hurry downstairs. Everyone is already there, looking as fine as ever in their formal wear.
"Ready to sing your heart out?" Jin asks me as Namjoon herds us to the van.
"Yeah, I guess so," I mutter, rubbing my hands on my arms because there's a chill in the air.
"Here, honey." Jin pulls out of nowhere a fluffy white shawl and puts it around me. He clasps it in the front and I blink, in shock of how quickly and smoothly he did that.
"I always come prepared," he says with a wink, opening my car door for me. I slide into my seat (shotgun because of my outfit), still in a slight daze at Jin's effortless shawl move. He gets into the driver's seat, ready to chauffer me to the concert hall.
After a smooth ride, Jin parks and hops out of the car, telling me, "Don't open your door!"
I hold back a smile as he dashes to my car door and opens it for me, helping me out. I feel like Cinderella getting ready to enter the ball.
"Thank you Jin, always the gentlemen," I say, which is totally true. I haven't forgotten ysterday's elevator incident, but Jin is acting the same that he's always been. I'm grateful because I'm still trying to process the events that happened.
"Of course, my lady." He does an exaggerated bow, and I laugh while the rest of the boys come around the van.
"Let's go!" Jungkook says, skipping ahead with Taehyung.
I walk fast, trying to get out of the cold, even though Jin's fancy shawl has blocked some of it. The bite is still in the air, chilling my bones. But, alas, my heels cause me to not be as fast as I want to be.
"Hey Y/n, do you..uh..want me to..uhh..." Namjoon stutters from his position on my right. He almost trips over a rock and I reach out a hand, afraid that he's going to fall.
"You okay, Joon?" I ask, concerned for the man.
"I'm fine," he mumbles, pink dusting his cheeks. "I was just gonna ask if you wanted me to carry you."
He says the last part so quietly I almost wonder if I heard it right.
"Oh, uh, well that's nice of you, but, uh..are you sure..." I can't find the right words but then I stumble on a piece of gravel and stop for a minute to adjust my heels.
"Dammit, Joon, just carry the lady already!" Jin calls from in front of us. Yoongi gives us a look, raising his eyebrows at Namjoon.
"Okay okay hyung." Namjoon gently sweeps me up, bridal (or princess) style. "This okay, Y/n?" He asks, not even struggling to hold me at all.
Why is it so hot?
"Um, yeah, it's fine, thank you Namjoon," I say, suddenly feeling a rush to my cheeks and warming my whole body.
Namjoon holds me steady as he takes big strides towards the entrance, and I can't stop myself from gazing up at him. His brows are furrowed and his lips are sllightly pursed, as if he is afraid he'll drop me. But I know he won't.
"You alright there?" He asks me, sharp lines softening into soft creases and dimples as he looks down at me.
"Yep," I say, aware of how close our faces are. His lips look really soft and pink, especially in this lighting of the sunset.
"Hey lovebirds, we made it!" Jimin cheekily says, holding open the door for us.
Namjoon hastily clears his throat, setting me down carefully, as if I'm glass.
"Thanks Joon," I murmer to him, ignoring the big smile stretched across Jimin's face.
"We'll go find the waiting area," Yoongi says, gesturing for the boys to look at the directory.
"I'm gonna go downstairs! Bye guys," I say, walking as fast as I can in my heels towards the stairs.
"Break a leg, Y/n!" They call.
I descend the stairs slowly because I'm thinking about Namjoon (and I'm trying not to fall). Sure, he's always been handsome, but I hadn't realized how strong he was too. I knew he worked out and had muscles, but to be carried by him really makes me realize his strength. A gentle giant, I think.
I reach the basement and find a place to put my purse and Jin's coat.
"Hey Y/n!" Seungmin says, waving to me from across the room. I walk over to him and Jihyo.
"Hey guys! How are you doing?" I ask, crossing my arms.
"Good! Finally ready to sing these songs that we've been practicing forever," Jihyo says with an eye roll. But I can tell she's not serious. Jihyo is one of the best singers we have, and she mastered our songs before anyone else. Of course it would seem like we've been rehearsing forever to her.
"Yeah yeah, miss star singer," I say teasingly with a fond eye roll of my own.
"Anyways, let's not talk about choir. Let's talk about something more important." Jihyo has a gleam in her eye as she leans her head forward towards me. "Something like..you and those boys. There's seven of them, right?"
I look at her, confused as to how she knows about them. Then I turn to the culprit, who is smiling guiltily.
"Seungmin!" I cry, smacking said boy on the shoulder.
"Ow! Hey! Listen, I didn't mean to, it just slipped out." I don't believe him, but I can't be mad at him. Jihyo is kind, and I know she won't tell anyone.
"It's okay, Y/n, no need to be shy," Jihyo says, waggling her eyebrows, "Of course, I'm dating Jeongyeon, but anyone with eyes, attracted to men or not, can see that they're absolutely gorgeous. And kind." Jihyo starts counting on her fingers. "And loaded. And jacked. And have a fine-"
"Okay! That's enough!" I say, cheeks on fire yet again because of the way Jihyo is so brazenly talking about them.
"You should totally go for it," she urges, suddenly serious as she places a hand on my shoulder. "You deserve a good relationship, and by the way they act around you you have nothing to worry about."
I sigh, not wanting to talk about my relationship with the boys. Yes, I had hope, but I don't want to make a fool of myself.
"Look, I'm not going to force you to talk about it, but you should at least know that they care for you, whether it be as just a friend or something more. Try to talk to them, and if you don't feel comfortable then try to notice how they act around you." Jihyo pats my shoulder once more before she heads off to warm up. Since when did she give great advice?
"I didn't mean to tell her, Y/n, but she had heard of the bad rumors Haneul was saying. So, I had to clear them up and it just kinda came out. She has such a warm presence and made me just wanna..I don't know..talk. I'm sorry," Seungmin apologizes.
I sigh yet again, still a little irritated but understand where he's coming from. Jihyo does radiate big sister energy, and I'm sure Seungmin felt like he could trust her.
"It's okay, Seungmin, I understand. And her advice actually did help me in a way. But for now, let's go focus on warming up and performing good." I change the subject and start going through vocal exercises. Seungmin looks like he wants to say more, but doesn't, instead joining me.
We warm up and then join the rest of the chor in doing scales and such.
"Okay everyone! We're on in ten," Professor Park says, "You all know your lineup spots, so break a leg!"
Everyone disperses, some going to get water, others (like Jihyo) practicing their notes one more time.
"Alright, let's do this," I mumble to myself. I'm not that nervous because I don't have any solo parts, and while my singing may not be good enough to make me famous, I am confident in my voice and my harmonies that I have to sing.
"Good luck, Y/n," Seungmin says, flashing me a smile as he heads upstairs on the opposite side where the tenors and basses go.
"You too," I say back, drinking one more swig of water before going upstairs with my fellow sopranos and altos.
We get into order, and I stand in between Momo and Jihyo.
"Break a leg, girls!" Jihyo says to us, smiling before we head into the lights.
We walk on in a line, going up onto the riser, and I don't trip in these stupid heels, which I count as a win. The choir settles as Professor Park raises her arms, ready to cue the pianist and us. I hurridly scan the crowd for the boys, and find them in the middle of the third row. Yoongi catches my eye and softly smiles. My heart twings but then I have to focus Professor Park.
Our music starts and I take my breath and sing.
Singing was always a hobby to me in primary and high school, never serious enough to make me audition for honor choir, but I always enjoyed it. My voice was not the best, but I knew the notes and could hold singing against the other vocal parts.
Jihyo's solo starts and I am happy for the short break. I listen to her, and hope that she can get out of here and become a singer, which is her dream. She's majoring in music education, and while she would be an amazing teacher, I think that her true dream lies in performing.
The songs go smoothly, but I find my eyes being drawn to the boys instead of Professor Park. The maknaes are encouraging, big smiles and cheeks drawn up. Yoongi and Namjoon are more subtle, softer smiles on their faces, looking as if they're being transported to another world with the music. Jin and Hobi bob their head to the music, and I wonder if they know that they're in sync with each other.
Our set finishes and we bow with Professor Park and the pianist. The boys all clap zealously and I flash a smile at them, hoping that they see.
Once backstage we head downstairs until everyone else finishes their set. I watch with Seungmin and Jihyo on the TV.
"Great job, everyone!" Professor Park says, grinning as she congratulates us on a successful concert. I bow and thank her before grabbing my purse and coat and say goodbye to Seungmin and Jihyo.
"Think about what I said, Y/n!" Jihyo calls as I head to the stairs. I nod and wave to her.
Oh, I'll think about it. Talking to them is out of the question; it's too scary of an option. I guess I'll just have to notice how they act around me. Like when Namjoon literally carried me inside today. Or when Jimin gifted me this ring. Clearly they care about me, that much is obvious. But is it as a friend does, or something more?
These thoughts are all clouding my brain I hardly realize that I've made it up all the stairs, ignoring the dull ache in my feet.
There are hordes of people, but I only search for the boys. Namjoon is pretty tall, so I should be able to see him. I walk slowly into the crowd, scanning all over for them. But where in the world are they?
I feel a warm and gentle hand lay itself on my shoulder. I turn around and it's like he knew I was thinking about him.
"Namjoon! I was looking for you, but I couldn't find you or anyone else!" I exclaim, seeing the familiar faces of the boys behind him.
"We're here now. And you did absolutely amazing, sweetpea," Namjoon says, taking his hand off my shoulder to gesture at Jin, his dimples creasing his cheeks.
"To your beautiful performance, babe!" Jungkook cheers as Jin hands me a giant bouquet of flowers.
I'm in awe of how big it is, and it almost dwarfs my view of them.
"We hope you like peonies," Jimin says, plucking one effortlessly from the bouquet and slipping it into my hair like a lead from a teen romance movie.
Okay, definitely noticing these actions.
"They're gorgeous! Thank you so much. I can't believe I didn't see these when we came in," I gush, holding the bouquet in my arms and inhaling the sweet fragrance.
I hear the sound of a camera click and catch Taehyung holding a Polaroid.
"Tae! Did you just take a picture of me?" I chasten, but unable to keep the smile off of my face.
"Of course I did. You look so regal, like a queen in that dress and holding those flowers." Taehyung grins his endearingly boxy smile.
"You can sing, you can dance..is there anything you can't do?" Hobi asks, giving me a big hug.
"There's plenty of things I can't do," I say, giving him a big squeeze back. He is radiateing happiness and I feel myself smiling even bigger.
"Why don't we take a group photo?" Asks Namjoon, handing his phone to a random person.
The boys bunch in around me, Yoongi and Jungkook beside me.
"I'm proud of you, Y/n," Yoongi murmers into my left ear as everyone settles.
"One, two, three!" We all smile as I hold the monster bouquet in my hands.
"Thank you, Yoongi, that means a lot," I say quietly back to him as Namjoon checks the photo.
"Of course, sweetheart." He smiles at me, showing his gums.
Namjoon deems the photo good and thanks the stranger.
"Alright! Should we get ice cream or go home?" He asks me. I'm tired, but I'm not going to turn down ice cream.
"Let's go get ice cream," I say, and the maknaes cheer.
"Yay! I knew you'd make a good choice, Y/n," Jungkook says, practically skipping to the doors.
"Hold on, before we leave, uh, Y/n, I brought you these." Namjoon reaches into his bag and pulls out my Converse.
"Oh! Are those for me to change into?" I ask, touched at the thoughtful gesture. I really was dreading walking into Baskin-Robbins with these heels on.
"Yes! I mean, only if you want to," Namjoon says, flushing as the boys laugh at his hesitant tone.
"That would be wonderful," I say, making Namjoon break into a grin, his dimples popping out as he hands me the shoes.
I sit down on a bench and quickly slip off my heels. My feet are grateful to Namjoon, as my Converse feel so good when I slide them on.
"Here, let me take your heels," Namjoon offers, putting them into the bag.
"Alright!" I pop off the bench, ready to go eat some delicious ice cream. "Let's go!" I shrug on Jin's coat and push the doors open.
We walk into the chilly fall air and head to the car. After arriving at Baskin Robbins, we pile out and go into the store. I carefully place my bouquet on my seat in the car before shutting the door.
"What are you going to get, Y/n?" Jungkook asks me, opening the door for me.
"Hmm, I'm not sure," I say, contemplating my options as I head to the register and look at the menu. "I usually go for chocolate, but I'm thinking maybe something different."
"I'm going to get mint chocolate," Jungkook says, making Namjoon scoff.
"I still don't know how you like that monstrosity, Kook," he says, rolling his eyes.
"We all have different tastes, hyung, so don't be salty that mine is superior." Jungkook smiles smugly as Namjoon turns to me.
"What about you, Y/n?" He asks, crossing his arms, "Surely you don't like the horrendous flavor of mint chocolate?"
"Actually.." I say, making Namjoon's eyes widen in disbelief. "I don't think it's bad. Is it my favorite flavor? No. But do I hate it? No. Will I eat it? Yes." (a/n: sorry to anyone who hates mint choc, it's okay imo)
"Wow, Y/n. I can't believe you'd betray me like this," Namjoon says, ordering his rocky road ice cream.
Jin orders cookie dough, and Yoongi orders vanilla. "You're so boring, hyung!" Jimin says, but Yoongi promptly ignores him.
Jimin orders cotton candy while Hobi orders cookies and cream.
"Tae, what are you getting?" Jimin asks as he steps up to order.
"Can I have one strawberry cone, please?" He orders, and steps aside so Jungkook and I can go.
"Hello, could I get one mint chocolate chip cone please?" Jungkook asks, making many of the boys' faces twist in disgust.
"Ew, Jungkook," Jin says, nose wrinkling as he takes another bite of his cookie dough.
"Could I please get one chocolate cone?" I order, then before I can pay Jungkook swiftly puts his card into the reader.
"Jungkook!" I exclaim, but the boy just replies, "Let me treat you, Y/n. You just performed and deserve to be treated."
I scoff but thank him, as it's too late to do anything now.
After receiving my ice cream, I head to the table where the rest of the boys are. They're talking about the dance showcase tomorrow.
"Yeah, my rehearsal is at 8am tomorrow," Hobi complains, making Jimin snicker.
"Tough luck, mine's at 9," he boasts, making Hobi steal a bite of his ice cream.
"Hyung!"
"Mine's at 10, so I guess I win," I say, sliding into the open seat next to Jin.
"Yeah, and our partner rehearsal is at 10:30," Jimin says, stealing a bite back from Hobi.
As we chat about tomorrow and nonsense (like mint chocolate chip as a flavor), I find my eyelids becoming heavier. I feel full, warm, and happy, and I could totally go to bed right now.
"Looks like someone's tired," Namjoon teases as I lean my head against Jin's broad shoulder, ice cream long finished.
"We'll leave soon, honey," Jin reassures me, gently carding his fingers through my hair.
Sure enough, we pile back into the car and head home. I fight the urge to fall asleep all the way home, telling myself that I need to shower and take off my makeup properly.
As soon as we reach home I open my door but am swept into the strong arms of Jin. I'm too tired to protest and find myself enjoying it, much like earlier with Namjoon.
You've been carried twice today, my brain says unhelpfully.
"C'mon, honey, I'll carry you upstairs." He opens the door and gently takes my shoes off before carrying me upstairs to my room. He sits me on the bed and peels the shawl off of me, draping it on my chair.
"Okay, honey, which drawer are your pajamas in?" I point to the right one and he pulls out a pink set with strawberries on it. "These okay?" He asks, and I nod. "I'll put these right here, okay?" He lays the set down next to me then heads to the door. "I'll get out so you can shower. Be sure to take off your makeup properly, sweet girl."
He disappears into the hallway, shutting my door with a soft click. I count backwards from five before heaving myself up and getting ready to take my shower. I do properly take off my makeup, not wanting to disappoint Jin.
I take a quick shower before drying off and changing. I avoid trying to detangle the nest that is my hair so I brush my teeth and use the bathroom. I then try to untangle the knots in my hair, hardly succeeding, when I hear a soft knock on the door.
"Come in," I call, hoping that my voice is strong enough to be heard.
The door opens before Jin pokes his head in.
"Hey, honey. I brought you your water bottle." He comes in, now clad in soft-looking blue pajamas with clouds on them. He places my water bottle on my nightstand before seeing my struggle with my hair.
"Thanks Jin," I say, tugging but with basically no strength. Damn hair.
"Do you need help?" He asks, and my tired brain doesn't think before replying, "Yes please."
He leads me to sit on my bed and I give him my comb. He's so gentle, untangling the knots without any pain at all. He then brushes my damp hair, and I swear I'm in heaven. Jin's movements are so soft and light, and I instinctively relax my shoulders and close my eyes.
"All done." He puts my brush away before asking me, "Are you all ready for bed?"
"Yes," I say, having gotten completely ready before trying to do my hair.
"Perfect. Why don't you get in bed for me, honey?" Jin pulls back my covers and helps me in. He tenderly takes my glasses off and puts them next to my water bottle on the nightstand.
He tugs the covers up around me and turns off my lamp. I drift off almost immediately, and before I completely succumb to sleep, I swear I feel lips ghost my forehead.
a/n: yippee another chapter done! i binge wrote this almost all in one day lol. music week is almost over, and i hope that it hasn't been too boring or repetitive! one more chap to wrap it up, then on to the next plot point! hugs, em 🩷🩷
well maybe if taehyung would say he misses a fan organized project to prevent mobbing at the airport everyone would stop. oh wait. well maybe if taehyung or jimin would point blank tell everyone to go home! oh. wait. maybe taehyung should question where y’all are getting pictures of his non famous friends. wait. what? WELL maybe if jeongguk would call sasaengs bastards on a live and openly look terrified about people calling him. oh…wait. WELL!! maybe if yoongi would talk about his anxiety around people in crowded spaces!!!! well. wait. maybe if yoongi would say airports are public places and they don’t want to be burdens by sticking around and causing a commotion. oh….wait. maybe bighit should just post a list of blocked fansites!!! oh you mean one is still stalking taehyung and all his solos are posting her content?????? well maybe bighit should post fam etiquette rules once every business quarter that clearly say not to show up to the airport. oh….that exists already? well what if—
because at some point we just have to acknowledge that the vast majority of fans do not give a fuck about the member’s privacy in any meaningful way. because maybe someone doesn’t interact w airport content but they insist of giffing fancams from well known fansites. maybe someone doesn’t interact with airport content but they follow jeongguk’s brother or bam’s dog daycare on instagram. maybe someone doesn’t interact with airport content but they sit quietly while all their mutuals gif fansites or airport content or content of the members in vulnerable moments. it’s always been bad but post 2020 armys care more about internet validation in every facet of what they do online that they’ve completely stopped regarding the members as humans lmao.
warnings: ❗️any characters in the story have nothing to do with their real life counterparts❗️f reader, reader with glasses, curse words
*lmk if i missed any*
word count: ~5.2k
a/n: i'm back. i am so so sorry this took to long; i had written like half of it earlier but didn't have time to finish it. but!! it's summer, and i got a new laptop! so hopefully more writing. also i'm officially a graduate! yay! on to uni :) thank you readers for sticking with this story. it truly means a lot. 🩷
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Warmth. Light. Trees.
I’m standing in a forest, the sun filtering through the trees. I look down and I’m wearing a white spring dress, unfit for the chilly time of year. I touch the trees and feel the coarse bark underneath my fingertips.
“Y/n.”
I hear my name whispered through the breeze. It’s faint, and I strain my ears to hear it.
“Y/n.”
It sounds familiar, a voice I can’t quite place.
“Y/n.”
“Yes? Who’s there?” I whisper, trying to find the mysterious voice hidden in the trees.
“Y/n.”
I jolt awake. Strong arms are around me and my back is pressed against something firm and warm. I realize it was just a dream, but Jungkook was the one saying my name. And now I’m cuddling with him, his strong planes of his chest against my back.
“You awake?” He asks gently, making me look slowly up. He’s absolutely beautiful in the morning (but he always is), even with a ruffled head of hair and sleepiness in his eyes.
“Yeah,” I murmur back, closing my eyes again, wanting to go back to sleep.
He’s so warm..and strong..I think.
“Y/n, baby, you can’t go back to sleep,” I hear Jungkook faintly say, as I’m already halfway back to dreamland, “We have to get up and get ready for the day.”
He called me baby, I think. But I ignore him, so happy with the warmth and comfort that I don’t register the door opening.
“Jungkook…” I hear another voice but it sounds like I’m underwater.
Whoosh! A burst of cold wraps around me and I shoot my eyes open. There’s Taehyung grinning at me, my precious blankets and sheets in his hands.
“Hey, what was that for?” I grumble as I put my glasses on.
“Come on, Y/n,” Jungkook says, stretching and going to stand by Taehyung, “Don’t be upset now. I told you you had to get up.” He has a bunny smile on his face and I sigh.
“Fine, fine. Let me go freshen up before I head downstairs,” I say, stretching too and then heading to the bathroom.
“Sure. Also, it’s really late so we’re having brunch downstairs so hurry down! Jin-hyung made mockmosas!” Taehyung chirps, pulling Jungkook out of my room and shutting the door. (a/n: are those a thing? if not, they are now)
I laugh as I get ready, freshening up then pulling on jeans and another sweatshirt of Jungkook’s. I descend the stairs and see that everyone’s at the table, with Jin at the kitchen mixing up the drinks.
“Hi Y/n,” he greets, “Sit down, have a waffle and some fruit and a mockmosa.”
I thank him then sit down next to Jungkook and Jimin.
“Jin-hyung made you a special mockmosa,” Jimin says, pushing a glass towards me, “He says that it tastes fruitier than the others because you prefer that.”
I’m touched.
“Wow, Jin, how did you know that?” I ask, taking a sip. It’s the perfect blend of fruity and fizzy.
“I have a sixth sense, honey,” he says with a wink.
I roll my eyes with a smile and thank him nonetheless.
“Wait is that my sweatshirt?” Jungkook asks making me cough on my drink.
“Woah woah, careful princess, don’t want you to die.” Jimin hits my back to try to get me to stop coughing, but it doesn’t help. And now I’m blushing AND coughing.
After my coughing fit subsides, I answer hesitantly.
“…Maybe?” I smile sheepishly, my cheeks burning.
“Uh huh. I know that’s mine because Joon-hyung gave me that for my birthday last year,” Jungkook teases, sly smile on his face.
“Oh gosh, I didn’t know it was a birthday gift!” I hastily say, “Let me go change! I just thought it was cute and I’m sorry for taking it-“
“Babe, it’s fine.” Jungkook places his hand on my wrist to stop me from getting up, his expression worried instead of the smirk on his face a second ago.
“Yeah! It looks better on you than Kookie anyways,” Jimin teases, causing Jungkook to glare cutely at him.
“Hey! What’s that supposed to mean?” He asks, crossing his arms.
Jimin cackles. “Oh baby, I know you’re cute, but Y/n is just adorable in anything she wears.”
I want to sink into the floor and never come back. Can’t I just enjoy my mockmosa in peace?
“Yeah, that’s true. The embroidered carrots just match her vibe, you know?” Jungkook smirks again and as I look to my left Jimin also wear a devious look too.
“Hey, stop teasing the poor girl,” Yoongi says, but still shooting a small smile my way.
“Yeah, listen to Yoodles and shut up,” I mumble, trying to focus on eating.
Jungkook and Jimin laugh but change the subject to today’s event.
It’s Yoongi’s music showcase, and I’m so excited to listen to his music. I have listened to a couple of his songs, but today he’s showcasing his new album D-Day.
After an hour we all pile into the car, minus Yoongi, who left earlier. Jin drives, with Jungkook sitting shotgun (he fought hard for that spot, and no one wanted to fight with him today). Hobi and Namjoon sit in the middle and Jimin, Taehyung, and I sit in the back.
The 94s are avidly discussing Yoongi’s work, being the only people who have heard his new songs.
“He really is a genius with his lyrics,” Namjoon praises, smiling fondly at the thought of Yoongi.
“No wonder we call him Min genius,” Hobi says, matching Namjoon’s dreamy look and big smile.
“Aww, look at those two geeking out..” Taehyung whispers into left ear, making me snap out of my daydreaming and suppress a shiver. He’s sitting next to me, as I’m squeezed into the middle seat.
“I know,” I whisper back, “They’re so passionate about Yoongi. It’s sweet.” It is sweet, how much they care about each other.
“You know, Namjoon-hyung and Hobi-hyung also used to write rap lyrics,” Jimin says, whispering into my right ear.
It’s really hot in the car. Or maybe it’s just me?
“Really? That’s so cool. I wonder what their lyrics were like,” I muse, imagining Namjoon and Hobi with microphones in hand, gold chains around their neck, caps on backwards. Oh my god, they would definitely wear dark sunglasses too. I puff out a laugh at the thought of that.
“We can go to Yoongi-hyung’s studio and look into the archives, I know the password-what’s so funny?” Taehyung asks, stopping mid thought.
“Nothing,” I reply, smiling at the thought of Namjoon and Hobi wearing thick chunky rings and earrings. Ha! Namjoon wearing chunky earrings.
Jimin pouts.
“Y/nnnn just tell meee,” he whines, “Don’t tell Tae, just tell me.”
I roll my eyes fondly.
“Never mind, you two. We’re almost there.” I gesture out the window. Jin is turning into the parking lot of the music building at our university.
“Hmph.” Tae pouts like the baby he is, and I resist the urge to coo and pinch his bread-like cheeks.
“Everyone out!” Jin shouts, unbuckling and opening his door with a haste.
Jungkook rolls his eyes.
“Jin-hyung, we’re not even late,” he says, leisurely unbuckling and getting out, stopping to stretch in the sunlight.
“We should’ve been here ten minutes ago!” Jin practically shrieks, making all of us cringe.
Oh boy. An annoyed Jin is not a happy Jin, and that’s not going to be good energy for Yoongi’s showcase.
“Jin,” I say, going around the van to talk face to face with the man, “It’s going to be okay. Technically, Yoongi’s exhibit doesn’t open for another fifteen minutes.” He’s about to protest but I continue on, “I know you wanted to be here early for Yoongi, but we can’t even get up there until it officially opens, and the important thing is that we’re here, and here in one piece.”
“But-“
“She’s right, Jin,” Namjoon says, slipping his hand into Jin’s. “We’re here, safe, and ready to cheer our love on. That’s all that matters.” He gives Jin a peck on the cheek.
Jin sighs.
“Fine. I know you guys are right,” he mumbles, leaning into Namjoon and starting to walk. He and Namjoon look so cute together and I snap a photo before I too start heading to the building.
Hobi and Jimin catch up to them, with Hobi murmuring a quick “Thank you.” to me.
Taehyung and Jungkook, on the other hand, stay back and walk with me, Taehyung on my left and Jungkook on my right.
We chat about random thoughts as we walk, and I notice Jungkook and Taehyung pressing their sides close to mine. I smell Jungkook’s fresh and airy scent that mixes with Taehyung’s warmer and more woody scent. They make me smile, the perfumes as complimentary to each other as the people are.
We reach the doors and head inside. The sleek yet elegant lobby greets us, with signs to direct us to the correct rooms. Jin is with Namjoon at the front desk, grabbing what looks like brochures.
“Okay guys,” Jin says, handing out the brochures, “I know we’re just here for Yoongi, but after seeing his work we could check out other producers too.”
“Oh my god, Kim Woosik is here? Tae-hyung, Jimin-hyung, please come with me to see his work!” Jungkook begs, grasping his hyungs shoulders.
“Okay, okay, Kook. We can go there after we see Yoongi’s exhibit,” Jimin says, ruffling Jungkook’s hair fondly.
Jungkook scans the brochure, then his eyes widen.
“No no, hyung, we have to go now.” He says, panicked. “His exhibit leaves in half an hour, hyung! Half an hour! We need to go now. We can visit Yoongi-hyung after!”
“Okay, fine-“ Before Taehyung can get any more words out Jungkook drags him and Jimin towards the stairs.
“Bye guys! We’ll see you later, I guess.” Jimin calls, then grins as Jungkook forces him up the stairs.
The remaining guys and I look at each other, bemused at what just happened.
“I’ll be more mature, but Hobi-hyung, do you want to check out SUMIN’s exhibit? It’s also only here for another half an hour,” Namjoon says, turning to Hobi.
“Sure, Namjoon-ah,” he says, looping his arm through Namjoon’s. “Lead the way.”
They wave and head to the elevators, leaving me with Jin.
“Well, I know I don’t know much about the music industry, but I just want to go see Yoongi first,” I say, awkward at the sudden quiet.
“It’s okay, I’ll go with you,” Jin says, placing a hand on my shoulder. “It’s on the fourth floor, so let’s go this way.”
He steers me to the elevators and clicks the up button.
“Don’t you have famous people that you want to see?” I ask, confused as to why Jin didn’t go with any of the others.
“Sure, but I want to see Yoongi too,” Jin says, a soft smile on his face. “And what better company than you?”
Ding! The elevator slides open, and a couple steps out as Jin and I get in.
“That’s so sweet,” I say as I click the four button. “I’m glad to have you as company too.”
We start going up and get past the second floor. Then, clunk.
Oh no.
“Um, Jin,” I turn to the man next to me. “I think we’re stuck.”
“Ah shit, seriously?” He asks, looking for the emergency phone.
For some reason, I find this situation funny.
“I guess the universe just doesn’t want us to see Yoongi.” I throw my arms up, making Jin chuckle.
“Yeah. And our lazy asses didn’t want to walk like four flights of stairs so we took the elevator. Wait until the maknaes find out about this.”
Jin finds the red phone and holds it up to his ear.
“Hello? Hi, yes we’re stuck. Mhm. Okay. How long?”
As he converses I look at the mirrored wall on the back of the elevator. I fix my hair and Jin hangs up the phone.
“Okay, so they said that it should only be about 10-15 minutes until they can fix it,” Jin says, and I turn back to face him.
“Okay. That’s not too bad I guess,” I say, sliding down to sit on the floor. I pull out my phone. Damn. Ten percent.
Jin sits next to me and laughs as I wince at my phone charge.
“Low battery?” He teases, pulling his phone out smugly and shows me.
Sixty seven percent? Screw him, I think.
“Yeah yeah, whatever,” I grumble, annoyed that now I can’t play Block Blast while we wait.
“We could always play a game,” Jin suggests.
“I guess so. Do you have any on your phone?” I ask, shifting to reach for it. But the guy just pockets it and chuckles.
“Nope. Sorry. I’m not a game type of person,” Jin says, shrugging while I roll my eyes.
What kind of weirdo doesn’t have a singular game on their phone?
“Not even those stupid default ones, like Wordscapes or Sudoku?” I whine, desperate to do something. Yeah, I think I might be addicted to technology.
Jin scoffs.
“You know, not all games are online,” he says, poking my side. I flinch and scoot away from him.
“Like what?” I ask, suspicious of the look in his eye.
“How about we play two truths and a lie?” He suggests, making me sigh.
“Fiiine. Only because there’s nothing else to do.” I adjust to now sit cross legged in front of Jin.
“Okay, I’ll go first.” Jin leans forward. “I have a trust fund, I’m bisexual, and I can open a bag of chips with my toes.”
What the hell are these options? I side eye Jin.
“You seem like the type to be a trust fund baby..” I ponder, making a smile tug at his lips.
“Go on.” He just smiles as I struggle to decide.
The bisexual thing came out of nowhere, but opening a bag of chips with one’s toes also is so weird. But, the chip one is oddly specific, making me think it’s the truth.
“The lie is that you’re bisexual,” I say confidently. I mean, Jin is gay, so the likelihood of him being bisexual is lower than the likelihood of him not having a trust fund.
Jin smirks, then leans in towards my ear. I wait eagerly to hear that I’m right.
“Incorrect,” he whispers.
He pulls away, leaving me stunned. What was that? He is bi? Oh my god. So he likes girls too, like Hwasa told me.
“Okay, you got me there,” I say nervously, suddenly aware of how small the elevator is and how hot it is in here, “So tell me the lie.”
Jin just shakes his head, that damn smirk still on his plump lips.
“There is no lie, honey,” he says, relishing in my lack of a response.
My brain feel like it’s short circuiting. So Jin has a trust fund, makes sense. He’s bi, which is definitely new information. Maybe he’s bluffing about that? I should ask one of the boys about it. Maybe Namjoon? Or even Yoongi? Wait that means-
“You can open a bag of chips with your toes?” I blurt out, flushing as I see Jin laugh.
“Yes, I can. And don’t look so weirded out,” he chides, making me change my expression.
Then I realize something.
“You cheated in the game!” I cry out, shoving Jin’s shoulder. “You’re supposed to have a lie! Not all truths!”
Jin holds up his hands in a surrender motion. “Woah, woah. I just wanted to spice it up a little, honey,” he says.
I pout childishly. “Yeah, but how am I supposed to beat that? It’s not like-“
Clunk.
Woah, the elevator started again. That was quicker than I thought, which I’m grateful for because Jin is making me flustered. Not that I would admit that, though.
Jin hops up and holds out a hand to me. I ignore it, making him chuckle.
“What’s wrong, Y/n?” He asks innocently.
I cross my arms and ignore him, enjoying the petty game I’m playing.
Ding! The doors open and I step out. Having memorized where Yoongi’s gallery is, I immediately pivot to the right on the tiled floor.
“Y/n!” Jin is beside me but I walk faster, ignoring him. “Come on!”
I hold in my giggles until I reach the sturdy-looking wood door with Min Yoongi on it.
I hurriedly open and shut the door, right in Jin’s face. This time I do giggle, because I hear a “Hey!” from outside.
Inside is a spacious room with headphones all around connected to screens with the title of a song. I guess people listen to each song individually with the headphones.
There’s only one person in here: a girl in the corner, listening to a song titled “Haegeum.”
“Is there someone out there?"
I turn my head and there's Yoongi, sitting in a comfortable looking gray chair with a sign that has his name on it behind him. He has a bemused look on his face.
"Oh! Uh, no. No one important," I say, still holding the door shut. It's quiet outside, making me wonder if Jin gave up.
"Mhm. Sure." Yoongi's phone starts to ring, and he looks at the caller ID then answers it. "Yes, hyung?"
Oh shit.
"You want me to open the door?" He asks, a smirk beginning to form on his face as he looks at me, my back still pressed against the door and hand on the knob. "Okay, no problem."
He hangs up and walks casually over to me.
"Hey Y/n," he says, looking me straight in the eye.
I gulp before responding. "Yes?"
"Mind moving? What if other people want to come in to see my exhibit?" He crosses his arms as I contemplate my choice.
If I don't give in, then I risk other people not being able to come see Yoongi's work, which could be harmful. And, I think I've taken this game a little far now.
"Okay fine," I say, moving away from the door. No sooner do I step to the side, the door swings open and Jin bursts in.
"Finally! Yah, Y/n, were you really going to continue to keep me out of Yoongi's exhibit?! That's the whole reason why we're here!" He's being really loud, and the girl in the corner quickly exits through the door at the other end of the exhibit.
"Shh, Jin," I chasten, "We need to be quiet and not dwell on the past. Yoongi here is going to show us his songs, right Yoodles?"
I grab his arm and lead him to the first set of headphones, Jin sputtering but following us. The song title reads "D-Day."
"So, tell us about this album of yours Yoodles," I say, now genuinely curious about his new songs.
Yoongi pauses, trying to find the right words. Jin is silent now, making it a thoughtful quiet in the room.
"This album, titled D-Day, is all about me showing my personal path to being free of social expectations. Liberation, per se, of those pressures that people put on me." He thinks some more before speaking again. "It's also about my internal struggles too. I tried to really tell my story in this album, and I hope that you and everyone who listens to it can resonate it some way."
Yoongi's cheeks are slightly pink under the dim lighting, and I can tell he doesn't like talking about his work much.
"Wow. That was so..beautiful," I say, even more excited to start listening to the songs. "I'm going to start listening now!"
I pick up the headphones and press play.
~
I finish listening to all the songs and reach the end, where Yoongi's sitting back in his chair. Jin is currently listening to one of my favorites, "AMYGDALA."
"Yoongi, I don't know what to say," I stop in front of his chair. "That was..amazing. You have such a beautiful way with words."
"Thank you," he says, happiness seeping through his words, "That means a lot. This album was my most personal one yet, and I'm glad you enjoyed listening to it."
"You know, AMYGDALA and Snooze were my two favorites. The rest were good too, don't get me wrong!" I say, "But those two just stuck out the most to me."
"Why's that?" Yoongi asks, tilting his head, his expression unreadable.
I pause. Why was is those two struck something in me? Maybe because of the meanings and stories behind them both.
"It's okay if you're unsure." Yoongi smiles gently at me as I look down at my Converse on the dark carpet. "Music and art in general can be so hard to describe and one may not understand why a piece may be more meaningful than others. So, if you can't tell me, now or ever, it's okay. I'm just glad my music made you feel something."
How can such a person exist? He put my thoughts exactly into words, but I still want to try to express my thoughts to Yoongi.
"No, I want to try," I say, determined to attempt to explain. "AMYGDALA just felt so personal, and I'm grateful to be able to listen to your story in such an emotional and raw way. I could sense your internal struggles too, during that song, and the want to be quote unquote 'saved.'" I fidget as I try to think of a way to describe Snooze. Yoongi nevers breaks eye contact, silently urging me to continue with the calming weight of his stare. So I do.
"Snooze felt more directed towards the listener too. You're telling the listeners that the road to success and happiness may be hard, but don't give up on your dreams. It's okay to have good and bad days, as we are all only human." I'm on a roll now. "Every day, good or bad, you tell the listeners that you are there for them; that you will be a pillar of support for them even if they are struggling. That's what so beautiful about Snooze: the way you assure your listeners that everything will be okay, even if it's not right now."
I stop, and look at Yoongi. He's gazing up at me, looking like an angel under the dim lighting. The ebony color of his hair is highlighted with the light, making it seem as if he's glowing. His eyes are impossibly soft, and his lips are curved up slightly. The almost admirable look on his face makes me nervous, for some reason.
"What's wrong. Why are you looking at me like that?" I ask, worried that he may think my interpretation is bad. Oh no. What if I misunderstood what he was trying to get across? This is why I don't say my thoughts out loud.
"No reason," he replies, fully smiling now. I look away, still slightly confused about his weird behavior.
"Okaay, so how much longer is your exhibit?" I ask him as Jin comes over to us, also finished listening to the album.
"About an hour. Will you guys still be here when I'm done?" Yoongi asks, directing the question mostly to Jin.
"Ah, probably. The rest of the crew needs to come in here and see your exhibit still, and I don't doubt that they will come at the end because they lost track of time in their current echibits," Jin says, rolling his eyes but with no malice behind it.
"Speaking of, did you guys have any other exhibits you wanted to visit?" Yoongi asks, resting his hand on his cheek as he looks at us.
"There was one," JIn says, checking the brochure. "And it closes in half an hour, so I'd better get going. You coming, Yn? Or are you staying here with Yoongi?"
I look at the empty exhibit and think that this would be a good time to ask Yoongi about what Jin said in the elevator.
"I'll catch up later," I tell Jin.
He nods and waves goodbye to Yoongi and I.
The door shuts and I'm left alone with Yoongi.
"So, any reason as to why you wanted to stay here with me?" Yoongi asks shifting in his chair.
My stomach starts to get a weird feeling in it. How do I bring up this? It’s a very sensitive topic and what if Jin was just teasing me in the elevator? I don't want to be wrong or sound rude.
"Hey." Yoongi's in front of me now, concerned look on his face. When did he get up?
"Hmm?" I ask, looking up at him.
"Is everything okay?" He asks, eyebrows furrowed with worry. "You seem to have drifted off in your thoughts again."
Oh gosh, he must think I don't care.
"Oh sorry! I didn't mean to, I was just thinking-" I start to say, but he interrupts me.
"You don't need to apologize. I noticed that sometimes you have longer thoughts in your head that may need a moment to process. I just wanted to make sure those thoughts weren't bad," Yoongi explains, gently leading me to his chair.
I try to protest, saying that I don't need to sit, but his look makes me sit.
The chair is very comfortable, I will admit that.
"Now, what's wrong? Clearly something is on your mind," he says, pulling out a stool that I didn't see earlier.
I guess I’ll just go for it. But I definitely need to explain some context.
"Jin and I got stuck in the elevator coming to see your exhibit," I start, but pause when Yoongi laughs. "Hey, it's not that funny," I pout.
"Sure it's not. Continue, please," he says, crossing his legs.
"We were bored. So, we decided to play the game of two truths and a lie." Oh boy, here we go. "Jin went first. He said that he had a trust fund, could open a bag of chips with his toes, and..." I trail off and swallow. God, why is this so hard? It shouldn't be.
"What did that idiot say?" Yoongi asks. "If he said something inappropriate or weird, you can tell me. Sometimes he says things that he doesn't mean," Yoongi says, making eye contact with me.
"No, it's not that," I say, "It's just something that was weird. He said that he was bisexual."
There. It's out in the open now.
I can feel my heart pounding in my chest as I wait for Yoongi's response. I can tell he's thinking about what to say.
"So there was no lie?" Is the first thing out of his mouth.
"I guess not," I whisper, as Yoongi just confirmed that Jin is bi.
"Does him being bi make you uncomfortable?" Yoongi asks, and I can tell he's analyzing my reaction. How do I explain to him that it makes me the opposite of uncomfortable? That is gives me hope that I shouldn't have about Jin and the rest of them?
"No, of course not." I say firmly, not wanting Yoongi to think that I'm judging Jin for being bi.
"Okay, so tell me. How do you feel?" Yoongi gaze is pinned on me, but not in a harsh way. Instead, it's one of curiousity.
I choose my words carefully.
"I feel a little surprised. To be honest, I thought that he would only be gay." I hope that came out not in an offensive way.
"Yeah, that's fair. All of us are obviously gay, but some of us are bi too. And then some of us don't have a specific label on our orientation." Yoongi shrugs, then continues. "Jin-hyung, Jimin, and Hobi are all bi. Namjoon, Tae, and I don't have a specific label. We just like who we like, and don't worry too much about the specifics. As for Jungkook, he's still figuring it out. He knows he's gay, that's obvious enough. But on whether or not he likes women, that remains to be seen for sure." Yoongi stops for a moment, letting the words sink in.
That helps me have some insight on the boys and their feelings. Hwasa was right, in a way. They all may like girls, some more sure about that than others. The selfish part of me is happy that I could have a chance.
I nod, and Yoongi continues, seemingly satisfied with my minimal reponse.
"But Jungkook has time. All of us have time, to be honest. There is no timeline to figuring yourself out. I could be 80 and still finding out new things about myself. I hope that clears up some things."
He is so poetic. I love the way that he describes things, and helps me to understand without feeling stupid. My ex would often explain things to me, but I would feel small and stupid after.
"It does, thank you." I appreciate the insight that Yoongi gave me about him and the rest of the other boys. I know it can be difficult to share that part of yourself, but it's clear that the boys and Yoongi aren't afraid of telling me about themselves.
As I visit other exhibits by myself, I find my thoughts straying to what Yoongi said about figuring oneself out. I feel old, but in reality I haven't even lived half my life yet. Those six months I wasted on my ex have still impacted me, even after we broke up. Why am I letting him affect me so much? My time with him may have felt long, but I have so many years ahead without him. I need to progress without worrying about him. The journey may be bumpy, but I need to try to figure myself out now, even if it does take time.
When I meet the boys in the lobby, I feel more more calm with my thoughts, Yoongi's words helping me more than he knows.
"Everyone ready?" Namjoon asks, as we all nod then head out. We're going out to dinner to celebrate Yoongi's album, and split between two cars, with half of us going with Jin and the other half going with Yoongi.
I go with Yoongi, along with Jimin and Hobi.
"I call shotgun!" I cheer as the other two groan, too busy talking to even think about it. I smile at Yoongi as I climb into the passenger seat.
Jimin and Hobi are distracted by their own conversation, so I take the chance to quietly talk to Yoongi.
"Hey, I just wanted to say that our conversation this afternoon was really helpful, so thank you" I look at the road, not having the courage to look Yoongi in the eye.
"I'm glad," he replies, glancing over at me, then focusing back on the road.
There's a lull. Jimin and Hobi's conversation is still happening, but it's like background noise. I gaze out the window at the sky, painted in fiery hues of orange and red.
It happens so quick, like a blink.
One second and Yoongi's hand is on mine. His touch is warm, comforting. I don't look at him and he doesn't look at me, but I can tell in that moment there's a shift. The air seems lighter, the sunset more vibrant.
I hold his hand tighter.
a/n: i have the next couple chapters planned out, so hopefully i can write them pretty quickly. next week i have my dance recital all week tho, so no writing then. but after i will!!! much love, stay safe and healthy ☺️🫶🏼
• warnings: so fluffy it might rot your teeth, deeply bittersweet, father-daughter dance, emotional damage via yellow-toned lighting, a soft man crying in a suit, coming-of-age ache, nostalgic tenderness, blink-and-sob moments, he’s not ready for her to grow up, you might cry.
• song : frank ocean , white ferrari ( immediately thought of this song while writing lol )
masterlist <
It’s Hana’s Sweet Sixteen today.
youd spent the whole week in fragments, phone calls and errands and three different shade tests of lipstick, crumpled fabric on the couch, and one late night spent scrolling through pinterest for table settings she’ll forget to notice.
Jungkook’s been pretending not to freak out, but the signs are there, pacing through the house with no destination, adjusting decorations that don’t need adjusting, brushing his thumb over old photos like they’re made of glass.
And now,
She’s here. Sixteen.
Her dress catches the light when she moves, this golden, soft sheen like it was woven from the sun itself. Her earrings are tiny little moons. Her hair is braided back just enough to show the shape of her cheekbones. She’s talking too fast, bouncing between friend groups, half-laughing, half-nervous, but glowing. The same glow she had when she was five with yogurt on her chin and sparkles in her socks.
Jungkook’s watching her like he’s underwater.
Time skips, like it always does— not in hours, but in tone. Music softens. the room exhales. They call her up for the father-daughter dance.
She finds him near the DJ booth, already waiting. His hands fidget at his sides. The lights dim — not all at once, but gradually, like the evening is holding its breath. That warm yellow settles in again, curling at the edges of everything like it’s a memory.
A song starts to play. A lullaby, slowed down, stretched out — something soft and unfamiliar in this grown-up space.
She tilts her head. “What is this?” she asks, voice quiet, amused.
He doesn’t answer right away. He takes her hand.
“I used to sing this to you,” he murmurs. “You were little. Maybe three.”
She frowns slightly. “I don’t remember.”
“I know.” He swallows. “I always will.”
Her smile is small, crooked. The kind that looks just like her baby photos.
They sway — left, right. One-two, one-two. Her hand is on his shoulder. He’s not really dancing. Just looking at her.
And then —
He sees her.
Not just Hana-now. But Hana-then. Chipped nails, pigtails. Cheeks puffed out from sobbing over a scraped knee. Gummy smile with applesauce stuck to her chin. Big glitter bow stuck in tangled curls. She’d cry if he walked too far ahead in the grocery store. Cling to his thigh. Beg him to read Goodnight Moon three times in a row.
She’s got the same eyes. Same mouth. Same voice when she’s tired.
And now she’s here. Sixteen. A woman. The same face, but older. Louder. Smarter. Braver. The you-shaped echo of every lullaby he’s ever whispered.
He should have seen this coming.
He should have prepared for it. But how do you brace for time to move so fast?
“I used to lift you with one arm,” he murmurs. “Now I’m scared to hug you too hard.”
She laughs. Presses her cheek to his chest. “You’re dramatic.”
“I know,” he exhales, smiling.
There’s a pause.
“Beautiful”
He wants to say something else. Wants to say you’re still my baby, or you were just five yesterday, or I’d do anything to freeze this moment, but it all sounds stupid in his head.
So that’s all he says. Just that. Just beautiful. Because it’s the only word that doesn’t feel borrowed.
They trip over each other’s feet halfway through the chorus.
She gasps. “Oh my god—”
“—Careful,” he whispers, laughing.
“Blame the heels,” she huffs, grinning.
She steadies herself. Her cheek returns to his shoulder.
He’s crying now. Quietly. The kind of crying that doesn’t shake your chest. Just seeps. Slow. Like his body’s catching up to what his heart already knew.
Later.
The party has ended. The lights are out.
The car ride is quiet. Hana’s passed out in the back seat, mouth slack, mascara a little smudged, hand curled against her dress like it’s velvet armor.
Jungkook is staring at her in the rearview. You’re holding his hand across the console. He hasn’t spoken since you pulled out of the parking lot.
At home, he doesn’t let you wake her.
“I got her,” he murmurs, already climbing into the back seat.
He lifts her gently, one arm under her knees, the other under her back. She’s heavier now — bones longer, breath deeper — but he still carries her like the world would fall apart if he didn’t.
She mumbles when he gets to the porch.
“Cold,” she breathes.
“I know,” he whispers. “Almost there.”
Inside, she’s only half-awake. Kicks her heel against the wall. He kneels, like instinct, and slips them off for her — one by one.
It’s slow. Reverent. Familiar.
He remembers the first time he ever helped her out of shoes. She was four. The shoes were clear plastic with rhinestones and glitter, too tight for her feet. She called them her “Cinderella shoes.” Told him he was her prince.
He remembers. She probably doesn’t.
She pads to the bathroom, washes her face, hair falling loose in damp waves. The mirror fogs slightly. He waits by her bedroom door with her blanket folded in his arms.
When she returns, he tucks her in.
Kisses her forehead.
Turns off the light.
But he doesn’t leave. Not yet.
He sits beside her, sinking into the edge of the mattress like muscle memory. Her comforter is pulled up to her chin, and her face is already softening in sleep — but not all the way. Not yet.
He leans down again, just once more, brushing a kiss to her forehead, softer than a whisper.
“Goodnight, my sweet girl,” he murmurs.
She stirs a little. Eyes still shut, voice slow and syrupy.
“Goodnight, Dad.”
He exhales through his nose. Smiles.
And for a second — just a second — he wishes she’d said Dada instead. Like she used to when her r’s were still wobbly and her arms would reach up to him without thinking.
He tucks a strand of hair behind her ear, his fingers lingering just a little longer than they need to.
And watches her breathe for a while, arms resting on his knees. She looks the same as she did the first night he ever held her — brand new and ancient all at once. A little face that could break him open with a smile.
He used to wonder how many more times he’ll get to braid her hair. How long before she stops asking him to blow raspberries against her tummy. How long before she forgets to call him in the middle of the night just because of The Monsters.
He feels that that point is nearing, or has already happened. So tonight he keeps holding.
Holding on a little tighter to what time can’t take away. Because growing up doesn’t feel real until the music stops,
• chap contents: emotional softness, fresh tattoo tenderness, surprise grand gestures, body worship through ink, girl dad feels, softness so potent it could make you feral
He always said he wouldn’t do it. “Nope,” he’d told you, years ago, when you were curled into him, tracing the ink across his arm. “I know myself. If I start tattooing everywhere, I won’t stop.”
So he’d kept his promise. One arm. Full sleeve. Nothing else.
Until now.
He doesn’t say anythinf, of course. He never does. You don’t even realize what he’s planning when he asks Hana to dip her hand in paint one random Saturday afternoon, laying paper on the floor like it’s just another one of their silly projects.
(He told Hana it was a game—called Stamp the Dada. She shrieked with laughter.)
You don’t question it again.
Until a few weeks later, when he pulls his shirt off in your bedroom, and you gasp.
Right along his side—starting from the sharp edge of his hipbone and winding up to just beneath his ribs—is a stunning, intricate piece of ink.
Her tiny handprint, immortalized in black and gray.
Your birth flowers blooming from her fingertips.
His twisting up the side like a vine wrapping them both together, leading up to his heart.
All three sets, twined in detail, with your names hidden carefully in the stems. Tiny. Subtle. But there. Right where they’ve always been.
His family.
You step forward, hand shaking, eyes burning. “Jungkook…”
“I’ve been sketching it for months,” he admits, suddenly sheepish, rubbing the back of his neck. “Didn’t know if I’d ever actually go through with it.”
Your throat closes up. “It’s beautiful.”
He catches your waist before you can fully cry. Kisses your temple. Rests his forehead to yours.
“I wanted something permanent,” he whispers. “Something that’s… always with me.”
You press your lips to his shoulder.
And then Hana walks in.
She sees it immediately—gasping, eyes wide, little feet hurrying across the room. She hops into his arms like a koala and places her small fingers directly over the sore, red skin.
“Ow,” he winces softly. “Gentle, baby.”
She pets it instead. Tracing her fingers over the curves of her handprint. Leaning her head on his bare shoulder like it’s hers now.
And it is.
Your heart breaks and swells all at once.
Because he’s holding her with one arm, and holding you with the other. All while wearing your love permanently carved into his skin.
And for a man who once swore he wouldn’t mark up more of his body, he looks like he’s never been more whole.
“She’s in pain,” Jungkook announces loudly, again, for the fourth time in five minutes.
The nurse doesn’t even look up this time. “Sir, please step out if you can’t stay calm—”
“I am calm,” he hisses. “That’s my daughter!”
“Jungkook,” you snap, elbowing him hard. “You’re scaring the nurse.”
He throws his hands up, outraged. “She’s crowning! And you’re yelling at me?!”
Before anyone can respond, Hana—sweaty, furious, mid-push—turns her head just enough to shout:
“MOM. DAD. GET THE FUCK OUT.”
You and Jungkook freeze.
The room goes silent.
Her poor husband (Let’s call him Minho, poor guy.) looks shell-shocked. Pale. Glancing between you two like you might fight the OBGYN if given five more seconds.
You nod once. “Okay. Love you. You’ve got this.”
Jungkook stares like he’s been personally betrayed by God himself, but he follows you out. Muttering the whole way down the hallway.
“She didn’t mean that. She was just—hormones. And pain. And you kept asking questions—”
“You asked if the epidural had a gluten-free option.”
“I was trying to help!”
The baby girl arrives twenty minutes later, loud and red and beautiful, and everyone is in tears.
You rush to Hana first, of course. Cup her face in your hands. Kiss her damp forehead. Tell her how proud you are. How beautiful she is. How strong.
Because she’ll always be your baby.
Even when she’s holding hers.
The next few weeks?
Grandpa Jungkook is unwell.
He FaceTimes daily. Sometimes twice. Never mind the baby’s asleep. Or drooling. Or literally just laying there.
“She smiled at me!” he swears. “I felt it.”
“Jungkook, she was pooping.”
“She smiled.”
When Hana finally lets them babysit, he’s ready.
Her old nursery has been transformed overnight. Same walls. New crib. Everything organic and top of the line. There’s a galaxy projector on the ceiling. A white noise machine that sounds like gentle forest rain. The carpet is suspiciously softer than it used to be.
The baby? Not impressed.
She takes one look at Jungkook’s face and screams.
Just. Blood-curdling. Scream.
He gasps. “She knows me!”
You blink. “She’s scared of you.”
“She’s just adjusting,” he insists, bouncing her like he’s done this every day of his life. “She’s my little princess.”
You cross your arms. “That’s what you said about Hana. And then she turned fifteen and threatened to punch you if you posted her on Instagram again.”
“Worth it.”
The next few hours are filled with a lot of crying (mostly from the baby, partially from Jungkook when she vomits on his white sweatshirt), a very competitive bottle-feeding attempt between you two, and exactly zero naps.
But still.
By the end of the day, she’s asleep on his chest, little hand curled around his necklace, while Jungkook whispers, “I think she looks like me.”
You roll your eyes. “You said that about Hana.”
“She did look like me.”
“She looked like a wrinkled potato.”
“And now look at her,” he sighs, stroking the baby’s head. “She made a human.”
You smile softly, watching his eyes glisten.
“Yeah,” you whisper. “She did.”
And now Jungkook?
He gets to love another little girl from the very beginning. All over again.
And this time, he’s even worse with boundaries.
But it’s okay.
Because love like his? The kind that spills over and drowns you in adoration?
warnings: gn reader, fluffy!!, not edited well, rushed, a singular curse word
word count: ~2.5k
a/n: merry christmas to those who celebrate! also, the drabble is exactly 2,525 words, which is perfect for the new year of 2025 ☺️
……………………………………………………………………………………………………………
You feel feather-like touches on your face. You scrunch your nose, wanting the ticklish feeling to go away so you can go back into dreamland. Burrowing down into the blankets, you sigh happily at the warmth they bring.
“Love, wake up,” you hear. But it sounds far away, so you turn over.
The light touches begin again, making you groan.
“Stop that,” you grumble, reaching up to hopefully bat away whatever was touching you.
“Ouch! Honey, what was that for?” You hear a familiar voice groan.
You hesitantly open your eyes, and sure enough, there’s Jin, holding his nose.
“Ah, you’re awake now.” He looks upset, but you know he’s faking it based on the slight upturn of his plump lips and the fact that it’s Christmas.
“Yes. Sorry, baby, did I hit you?” You ask, worried that you somehow marred his gorgeous face.
“You did,” he pouts, “So I need you to kiss it to make it better.” You sit up to take a better look at him, and he wraps his arms around you and pulls.
“Was that what you were doing earlier?” You ask, cuddling into his embrace.
“Yes. I thought it would be nice to wake you up with kisses on Christmas,” he says, “But instead I get bonked in the nose. What did I do to deserve this?”
Your boyfriend puts a hand to his forehead, ever the dramatic.
“Oh stop, you’re fine,” you say, turning your head to give him a quick peck on the nose. “There. Does it feel better now?”
“A little. But I think I need more than that,” Jin says. Then he leans down and passionately kisses you. His lips are soft against yours, and you melt against his hold. It’s as if the world was made for his lips on yours.
I never want this to end, you think.
You pull away, breathless and blushing. Jin’s ears are red too, and it makes you smile that both of you are still bashful even after dating for over two years.
“I love you,” Jin blurts, his ears burning even more after he says this.
You two say this often to each other, and you laugh at Jin’s shy expression.
“I love you too, Jin,” you say, meaning every word.
You sit up and kiss him again, enjoying this peaceful Christmas morning with your love.
~
After a breakfast of pancakes, you two settle in to watch Christmas movies, starting with Home Alone.
You open the blinds to your huge glass windows (that also serve as a wall) and stare down at the city below. You and Jin were lucky to be able to buy a high rise apartment with a gorgeous view of Seoul.
“Jin! The snow is beautiful,” you say, looking at the powdery white that falls down and blankets the city.
“It is,” Jin agrees, coming over to stand behind you. He wraps his arms around your middle and kisses your head.
“I’m so glad that it’s snowing for Christmas,” you say, “It makes everything perfect.”
You’re giddy as you admire the view, and don’t notice Jin admiring you. Sure, the view is pretty, but it doesn’t compare to you. You’re the most beautiful and wonderful person both inside and out, and he asks himself every day how he ended up with such a wonderful partner.
“What are you thinking about?” You ask, tearing your eyes away from the glass and looking up at Jin.
“You,” Jin declares, holding you tighter in his arms and relishing in the way you cuddle into him more. These soft sweaters of yours make you feel like a stuffed animal to him, and he just wants to hold you all day.
“Aw, that’s so sweet,” you coo, leaning back into Jin’s hold. He smells fresh, like just out of the shower. It’s a nice scent that makes you smile.
“Not as sweet as you, my love,” Jin declares softly. Your heart feels as though it may burst with happiness.
“I love you,” you murmur, staring out as the crystal snow continues to fall.
~
After a long Christmas movie marathon, you stretch slowly and turn to Jin. He conked out around the middle of White Christmas, and even in sleep he’s picture perfect.
You look for your phone and find it hiding underneath the pile of blankets on the couch. Grinning, you open the camera and take a photo of Jin. The chunky knit blankets surround him in a plush cocoon, and his red sweater looks bright and festive amid the neutral colors. He is the image of perfection, and you quickly change your lock screen to the picture of him.
As much as you hate to wake him up, you two need to eat dinner so you can decorate Christmas cookies. Since it’s Christmas, you decide to be nice and not use the megaphone that you have.
“Jin, baby, it’s time to get up,” you whisper in his ear. He barely moves and you sigh.
You do what he did earlier; pepper his face with kisses. One on his perfect nose, each of his cheeks, and his forehead. The last one you place on his plump lips. This stirs him a bit but not enough to fully wake.
You then start to gently shake his shoulders, not doing so harshly but softly, attempting to make him open his eyes.
“Come on, Jin, baby, you’ve gotta get up now,” you whisper, stumped as what to do next. Then you grin. You dart your hands to his sides and tummy, pinching and tickling him softly.
“Oh Jinnie~it’s time to wake up baby,” you singsong as you continue to tickle him lightly.
He finally stirs, opening his eyes and laughing quietly.
“W-what is it, honey,” he says, trying to grasp at your wiggling fingers.
“It’s time to wake up, you sleepyhead,” you tease, “You fell asleep during our movie marathon! So, I had to wake you up somehow.”
“You imp,” Jin says, finally prying your hands off of him.
“Yeah, but you love me anyways,” you tease, planting a kiss on his lips, “Now, let’s go eat and decorate cookies.”
~
After a short dinner, it’s time for cookie decorating. The sugar cookies have already been put in the oven, and you and Jin are now mixing Christmas colored icing.
“Hey! Y/n, I see you eating that frosting,” Jin warns, catching you as you lick some off your finger.
Your eyes go wide. Whoops.
“Sorry, baby,” you say, going back to mixing the frosting. “But it’s delicious!”
“I know, honey, but if you eat it all then we won’t have any to decorate the cookies with.” Jin shakes his head playfully, making you roll your eyes and smile.
“Fine, fine. Let’s take the cookies out now, I think they’re about done.”
You and Jin gingerly take the hot cookies out of the oven and put them on the cooling racks.
“Yay! My favorite part, decorating them.” You clap your hands together, looking gleefully at the icing and assortment of sprinkles.
Jin laughs at your antics, adoring how you look in the warm kitchen light. The whole scene is just so domestic, and Jin’s heart warms with your excitement.
“Alright alright honey. Let’s get started.”
You and Jin each work on your own cookies, and you furrow your brows as you attempt to decorate a snowflake.
“What’s that supposed to be?” Jin asks, peering over at your white and blue mess.
“It’s supposed to be a snowflake,” you say distractedly, wondering how in the world it came out to be such a heap of icing.
“Well, it looks more like an abominable snowman.” Jin snorts at your annoyed face.
“Whatever, let me see yours then Mr. Cooking genius,” you grumble, tossing a glance at his cookies. They’re decorated like ornaments, and while there are smears here and there, they look better than your so called snowflakes,
“Mine are fabulous, thank you very much,” Jin boasts, hand on his heart.
An idea suddenly forms in your head. You smile mischievously.
“Hey baby, you have a little something right…here!” You smear a glob of icing on his nose. You cackle at his expression.
“I know you did not just do that!” Jin gasps, reaching up and touching the icing.
“I just did! And I’ll do it again!” With that, you smear two more dollops onto his cheeks. Now he looks like a child who got into the frosting.
“Why you little…” Jin grabs his frosting and smears some on your nose.
“Argh! Jin!” You reach for sprinkles and throw some at him, hoping that some stick to the frosting on his face. A few dot his cheeks and he sputters in shock.
“Y/n! How dare you do that to my beautiful face!” He grabs for more icing and sprinkles too. “I’m coming to get you!”
You start running around the kitchen island, trying to avoid the onslaught of sprinkles thrown at you. Your cheeks hurt from smiling as you and Jin do a dance around the island.
“No!” You cry as Jin suddenly leaps at you (curse his long legs) and smears a ton of frosting on your face.
“Damn you, Jin,” you mutter.
Jin cracks up at the look on your face; a mix of defeated and annoyed. You look like an angry kitten, cute and adorably pouty.
“Sorry love, you started it,” Jin says, reaching over and wiping a green sprinkle off your face.
~
The rest of the cookie decorating goes smoothly, and then it’s time to exchange gifts. Every year, you each buy each other one silly thing and one more “serious” thing.
This year you bought Jin a new apron that has a picture of him holding that giant tuna fish that he caught and you repaired his grandfather’s watch for him. The glass was cracked, but you found a person to fix it and secretly took it there. The watch means a lot to Jin as his grandfather gave it to him when he was a child, and his grandfather was a role model for Jin growing up. You hope he loves it.
“Alright! Silly gift first,” you say, giving Jin the box with the apron in it. He hands you a small bag.
You’ve left the windows open in the living room, so Seoul gleams below you. Your Christmas tree twinkles in the dim living room light, and the ambiance feels like home. You and Jin are in matching pjs with candy canes on them as you sit on the fluffy rug by the couch. It’s cozy and perfect, and everything you’ve ever wanted.
“Open!” Jin declares.
You take the tissue paper out of the bag and put your hand in. You pull out fuzzy socks. But, they’re not just any socks, these ones are bright pink and have Jin’s face on them.
“Jin!” You laugh. “Is this official BTS merch?”
He looks offended.
“Of course not! I had to get it printed specially,” he retorts, crossing his arms, “Do you really think I would get you something anyone else could get?”
“No, no.” You’re laughing at you look at them closer. “Thank you, baby, I appreciate it.”
“You’re welcome. Now you can wear my handsome face whenever you want,” Jin says sassily.
You roll your eyes but smile at the cheesy but still thoughtful gift.
“Okay now open yours!” You’re excited to see his reaction.
He rips open the silver wrapping paper and pulls out the apron.
“It’s the super big tuna that you caught!” You laugh as Jin checks out the pink frills on the side of the apron.
“Thanks, honey, it’s really perfect for cooking,” Jin laughs, pulling you into a hug.
“I’m glad you like it.” You grin, excited for the more important presents now.
“Okay, moving on, you go first,” Jin insists.
“Alright.”
You hand him the watch box, wrapped in festive paper with snowmen on it.
He opens it carefully and sees the box.
“Oh my god,” he whispers, then opens the box gingerly.
“It’s your grandfather’s. I fixed the glass,” you say, trying to gauge his reaction.
“Yes. Thank you,” he murmurs, slipping it out of the box and looking at it in the light.
“I hope you like it. I didn’t want to take it without your permission, but I wanted it to be a surprise.” You’re rambling now, but you need to know if he’s upset with you. Which, you don’t think he is, but he’s not expressing much on his face right now.
“It is. I can’t believe you fixed it,” Jin says softly, “Come here.”
You scoot closer to him and he embraces you.
“Thank you, honey. I love it. I can’t believe I’m so lucky to have such a perfect sweetheart.”
He sniffs, and you turn your head and see that he’s almost crying.
“Jin, baby? Don’t cry,” you say, reaching up to wipe the tears coming out of his eyes.
“I’m sorry,” he says, making you shake your head.
“Don’t apologize, baby. I love you,” you say soothingly, wiping the remaining tears.
“I love you too.”
He holds you for a moment, praying to the stars above that you like his gift too.
“My turn, honey.”
Jin gently helps you to stand and clasps your hands in his. He takes a deep breath, then lowers himself to one knee.
You start to cry.
“Y/n, love, my honey and other half. I have been thinking about this moment for a long time now, and realize that I should’ve done this earlier.”
He’s an angel, disguised in the form of a human. The tree lights add a glow around him as he pulls out a tiny box from his pants pocket.
“You are the light of my life, the day to my night, my partner in crime. You are perfect in every way, and I love you. I always will, no matter what. We may fight and argue, but our love for each other overpowers any disagreement that we’ll have.”
Jin tenderly looks at you, and knows that this is the view that he wants to see for the rest of his life.
“Y/n L/n, you are my first and last love. There is no one else I want to be with for the rest of my life. So, I ask you this, will you marry me?” He opens the box, and sitting inside is a beautiful diamond ring. It’s not too flashy, but classic and exactly your taste.
Your tears blur your vision, but you hastily wipe them away and nod.
“Yes, Jin, of course.”
He stands up and pulls you into a kiss, tears falling again from his face. The kiss is laced with love, and you’ve never felt more content.
This is it, you think, this is what happiness is.
Your two hearts beat together, two souls merging to compliment each other. In every lifetime, you swear that you and Jin are soulmates. You’re destined to be together forever, and that sounds perfect to you.
As Jin slides the ring on, it fits perfectly, and you know that this is the Christmas you’ll never forget.
a/n: i hope you had a joyful holiday season (if you celebrate)! here’s to the new year, and please stay safe and healthy. hugs!! 🩷🩷~em
annaxmalina
dededos
stormborns
