An individual human being can be determined in so many different ways. Identifying who we are and what we are like in general is impossible, mainly because we all change our faces in different situations. We act and behave differently with our friends, colleges, strangers and enemies. If you are in love’s embrace while the universe leads you into the right direction or your heart is filled with hatred, you will make different decisions, you will talk differently to people around you, and see life differently.
At the moment I am deeply in my comfort zone, letting music to get in my veins, enjoying the smell of the pouring rain from my balcony. I feel like I am a different person now, not the same as I am usually at school among people who don’t even know a thing about me - for them I’m just a motionless face with a name that means nothing to them. I am not the same as I am drowning myself in liquor with my best friends or when I am alone with the love of my life, showing a face of mine that noone else knows about. So many different vibes can get and affect me. Somedays I want to be a rockstar, to meet people, travel around the world, experience as much as I can. Somedays I just want to be all alone, hiding myself from the world, that’s grown colder. Oddly, I could be the nicest person you’ve ever met, I could even made you laugh, still there are days when I’m haunted by my demons, then I will rip off your chest, because my life is a mess, I just need a rest.
The only person who can ever really understand me, is the one who lives in me. There is not a living creaton in this world who has seen all of my faces, not even me. I can’t describe half of the shit I feel inside. I am a heart of a child who lives in a monster, who puts on his mask every day to avoid everything that’s real, as I live in fear, I rather be in a place where noone can hear me scream.
I am the perfect failure, who can do remarkable things, then destroys everything around. I create dreams with ambition while seeing through my visions and destroying them with my irresponsibility and temper.
As the midnight air refreshes my soul, I can still find hope in myself. I might never change, but I am an individual human being with values. Not everyone can see that in me, but I still can. We all have a universe inside of us, we all have something precious in us. I will always embrace that part of myself that makes me who I am. I was not born to fit in or to be society’s little fuckin’ whore. This is the life I lead, writhing through different paths at the same time, with all of my faces to show, here I stand still, for all I am.