in my world they’re in the same universe and people are experiencing a generational run of vlogs from men abandoned in space
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

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trying on a metaphor
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@marchcountry
in my world they’re in the same universe and people are experiencing a generational run of vlogs from men abandoned in space
Do we really know Steve isn't into metal though? He definitely likes rock, and I love the HCs where he just doesn't know who he's listening to half the time which would gel with the "Ozzy who?" moment.
Eddie fully expecting the standard Normie reaction to his music the one time he's "permitted" to play his own cassettes in Steve's car, Steve looking puzzled as he listens before shrugging and carrying on driving.
It's not a negative reaction, +1 for Harrington apparently, but as they drive he keeps getting that little puzzled look on his face, and Eddie's starting to suspect Steve is fighting the urge to be a bitch about it, he's heard about his "trying" from the others.
He's not going to back down if Steve picks a fight over it, Eddie will defend his music to the death if he has to, so he's ready to bite back when Steve finally opens his mouth.
"Is this a new one?" not what he was expecting,
"huh?"
"The tape, is it a new one? I swear I know the voice but... I don't know the songs, is it new?"
"You've heard Black Sabbath before?"
"Is this that Ozzy guy then?" it's not, it's Ronnie James Dio, but that Steve remembered that is Interesting, that he recognises the music is more interesting.
"What songs do you know?" he asks, suspicious, Steve must be bullshitting him, there's no way.
"I dunno... that uh... one that—" he stops and starts 'da-na-na-na'ing Stargazer of all things,
"That's Rainbow, that's fucking Rainbow!"
Me and @jinkies-brooms-scoob were talking about potential high school Steddie and the dynamic is just. Elite. Because they don’t know each other well and don’t have the kid connection yet so Eddie doesn’t have much to go on. And would obviously assume these are gonna be secret locker room hookups. Only for Steve to try and wave at him in the halls and sit with him at lunch
He literally tried to make Nancy one of the cool/popular squad- who's to say his audacity wouldn't reach the heights of not caring about dating the Freak??
Exactly.
Steve wraps an arm around him in the hallway and Eddie’s like “what the fuck does he want me to suck his dick in a hall closet??” but no he just wants to be sappy.
“I missed you.”
“It’s been like an hour, Harrington.”
“Tell me about it.”
“Shut up and give me something better to do.”
PAH-LEASE
Eddie bags the most popular guy in school purely by accident because he sucked his dick once and now Steve won’t go away
steve catches him walking into lunch and jogs ti catch up with him, trying to lead the both of them to where he normally sits with tommy and carol.
"what the hell are you doing Harrington?", Eddie asks- genuinley confused
steve stops in his tracks. "i just thought. since we're. yknow. you would sit with me?"
Eddie snorts, but then clarifies once he realizes steve is serious. "dude no offense but. your friends kind of suck"
"oh"
"yeah. oh" Eddie confirms, and turns towards his normal table, only to hear Steve following behind him.
"what are you doing steve?"
"going to sit with you and your friends...?" he trails off, suddenly realizing this was not what Eddie had expected. "if that's ok?"
Eddie blinks, dumbstruck and the two stare at eachother for a moment.
"uh, Eddie?" steve looks over at the hellfire table and back to Eddie, as thought he is trying to remind Eddie of the question
"I. yeah. yeah. as long as you dont mind the guys giving you shit"
"eh" steve shrugs as he begins to lead the way to the table "can't be worse than tommy and carol"
Eddie stalls before following, rushing to catch up with this man who cannot seem to stop surprising him.
Gareth and Jeff like “???? Eddie why is HE here are you being held hostage???” and Eddie has to explain later that he gave King Steve one (1) blowjob and now he has attached himself to Eddie like an imprinted duckling
then of course he finds out they’re cool with the gay thing so he shows up to hellfire just to hang out and be openly mushy with Eddie
You know that snarky bit of writing advice that goes like “if you’re going to objectify the women in your media, then you also have to objectify the men”
Congrats to Matt Dinniman for being the first male author ever to understand the assignment
dungeon crawler carl is fun because you go into it thinking it'll be an unserious, fun and gratuitously violent action book, and then you get to the very first boss, and then you think, now hold on. Hold on. And then all of a sudden you're seven books deep and insane and also holding on to the indomitable human spirit for dear life and also a crab has to jack off. like holy shit dude. i've got relentless hope and found family in one hand and the world's weirdest foot fetish in the other
Only in a Dungeon Crawler Carl book could you read the sentence, "I used up all my good corpses on the last floor," and it makes perfect, reasonable sense.
Honestly not worried about spoilers for Dungeon Crawler Carl at this point because I can’t tell between real spoilers and au fanfic, which is a testament to how wild the actual story is.
Princess Donut should get hit with a Polymorph spell that turns her into a human teenager until they kill the spell caster so Carl has to grapple with the fact that he’s actually Donuts dad while fighting off his trauma with a stick
My conviction that Carl is very handsome has nothing with the several comments about his appearance which indicate that he is, but is almost solely based on the fact that he was in a long term relationship with Beatrice.
Beatrice strikes me as a person that's deeply invested in appearance, both how her partner looks and how they are perceived by others. Despite her cheating on him she looked at him as the person she wanted to marry, and was trying to manipulate him into proposing. I just genuinely don't think she would do all that if he's not also bringing the benefit of being a smokeshow to the table
saying "question mark?" and "however comma," out loud are game changers. punctuation on the go. and it's always the funniest thing that anyone around you has ever heard
Everything I read about recovering from burnout is like “it takes months or even years to fully recover” and it’s like okay…. I have a weekend before I gotta clock in on Monday
Just came home from a dinner party with the friendgroup at which several people kept saying "Ask Pedro" or "Pedro will know" and I was terrified that they were referring to an AI like Claude but no, thank fuck, they were referring to a cardboard cutout of Pedro Pascal that someone left upstairs and who has been designated a kind of patron saint status in the household.
i love that 17th century jewish poltergeist story where the family living in the haunted house calls a catholic priest for help before they contact a rabbi, because yeah, i think that would be my call too; id be like, oh? a demon in my house speaking latin and drawing inverted crosses on my wall in sulfuric bile? then without even questioning my faith i’d call up the catholic church and be like yo father, one of your boys loose come get him
“Look here pal, I know my religion, and this ain’t it. Whatever this guy is, they’re clearly from your version of things. Mind coming over to help fix things up?”
#not my covenant not my malefactor
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