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[marcr920]

He never called me princess or queen, but definitely treated me like one; until he brought me to that dark, noisy, filthy place.

-Is it going to be indoors or outdoors? Do you know how the wheather will be?

-it's a huge domed auditorium, by the end it's going to be really hot, babe.

A person like me who's cold all the time would know that meant i should wear a light but long-sleeved top.

-you're not allowed in with drinks or food. They will run a security palpation upon arrival.

No problem. I just need my inhaler. He's got the rest of the things I need.

We grab a crepe at the mall and eat it on our way . It's a 15-minute walk so we wont have to struggle with the hundreds of vehicles on our way home when the event is over. I'm excited it's my first time in my three decades of life, yet this odd feeling of discomfort begins to grow gradually as the night grows older.

The opening band is about to finish their performance. No worries, They're not that famous and I didn't spend my money to see them., I'm not missing out and we're on time. You can hear the roaring and cheering from a few blocks away. On the adjacent street we walk along the stands of merch. None of that crap calls my attention except for the t-shirts stamped with the image of a glass vial.

[marcr920]

*job interview (for internship) as a Biological Chemistry undergrad*

Interviewer: so why do you think you should work here?

me: have you heard of a series with the name of Breaking Bad?

interviewer (most likely a boomer): I think I've heard of it.

me (eyes shining with delight) : it's about a chemistry teacher who is diagnosed with lung cancer and is cornered to manufacture drugs to pay for his medical bills and still be able to provide for his family in his potentially premature departure

*interviewer stares in concern*

me: as chemistry students, we all want to be Walter White but not in the sense of building a meth empire and becoming a druglord. What's really inspiring about this lead character is his ability to apply his knowledge and skills in chemistry to overcome the many setbacks he has to face.

*interviewer still not seeing my point*

me: throughout the duration of the story we see how Heisenberg (the pseudonym he goes by, chosen after the physicist behind the uncertainty principle) uses his abilities, from teaching General Chemistry(chapter 1) to applying his knowledge in Analytical, Organic and other branches of chemistry, Thermodynamics,Toxicology, Quality Control, you name it (classes that were part of my curriculum). We also get a glimpse into the harsh reality of cancer patients as we accompany Walter in his diagnosis and screenings, treatments, symptoms and side effects.

Interviewer: so how does this answer my question?

me: after working so hard at college, we look up to Mr. White because we know that our potential as chemists is huge and we just need the opportunities to demonstrate our skills and to keep learning. I speak for my fellow chemists when I say that in my academic community we want to provide for our households and develop our true professional selves.

Interviewer: thank you for your time, you will hear from us soon. *proceeds to go home and binge watch BB, BCS, El Camino, all those minisodes and conspiracy theories about the Gilliganverse*

"oh, dear... if this is their role model, all of those chemist interns must be complet psychopaths*

YOUR'E GODDAMN RIGHT!

(JK, my sales abilities are not that great, I have no idea how synthetic addictive drugs are made, chrystallography is not something I could talk for hours about, and I would never run my car over my competition, let alone poison a child)

[marcr920]

e diary

I've finally decided to start my e-journal. I could definitely use some advice from my fellow internet users. It's wonderful when I see a like in my posts and realize that one beautiful soul took some time to read me. It boosts my confidence.

Reasons I'm starting my e diary:

*I want to connect with other people, make friends and receive feedback on my content

*I want to enhance my writing skills

*I want to document my mental state and well-being

If you have any ideas or insights regarding my project, I'd love to hear from you!

-marcr

[marcr920]

I miss him.

Yet, I was afraid. I feared that this concept of perfection I've come to embrace would melt away in an ugly reality.

We had a future together. He loved me back (or so it seemed). I had his attention, he desired me. However, a lot of things would have had to be sacrificed in order to be with him.

And what if I actually sacrificed them, all for nothing? Just to have him mistreat me and anihilate the positive feelings we once had, just like an average millennial marriage?

[marcr920]

Perfection is the perfect word to describe him. I never imagined being obsessed with someone could be possible. It's unbelievable how we come to actually believe someone is flawless. All those songs that talk about infinite love and unrealistic vows, ridiculous. And then I met him. And I didn't care how conceited and narcissistic he was, because all I could see before my eyes was a lovely angel uttering sweet words of small talk.

[marcr920]

I miss him.

Yet, I was afraid. I feared that this concept of perfection I've come to embrace would melt away in an ugly reality.

We had a future together. He loved me back (or so it seemed). I had his attention, he desired me. However, a lot of things would have had to be sacrificed in order to be with him.

And what if I actually sacrificed them, all for nothing? Just to have him mistreat me and annihilate the positive feelings we once had, just like an average millennial marriage?