boy prince of New York

not safe for sharks fans

[mathewschaefer]

the category is 'men thirst after mat barzal but express it in acceptably masculine terms'

[turnagain]

what did they mean by this

[segamascott]

[mathewschaefer]

can’t deny I was a huge brioux fan the first time around (like 2018) so this off-season is hitting

[mathewschaefer]

That tumblr post about how you can calculate the player’s attractiveness by the percentage of his pictures without a helmet is load bearing to me

[mathewschaefer]

This gleb pugachyov thing reminds me how if you’re Russian in the nhl you can either be a quiet dude that your coach openly bullies or you can take on the role of the class clown and people will genuinely think it’s because you’re stupid instead of because you’re speaking a language you barely know

[mathewschaefer]

congratulations to the newest second background pairing in willmack fics

[robindrake13]

🏒🇨🇦

[callsign-bubbles]

[neonfretra]

[Image transcript: Sharks told me teams keep eating his developed players so I asked how many players he has and he said he just goes to the draft and gets a new player afterwards so I said it sounds like he's just feeding developed players to other teams and then Celebrini started crying. End transcript.]

[mathewschaefer]

I like seeing sharks fans upset and also it will finally make them stop trying to force the brother thing with Victor Eklund (although I’m sure they will try to make William’s life hell for the second season of heated rivalry) so I’m happy for now

[mathewschaefer]

I can only imagine Brandon Bussi’s teenage years, which coincided with the spread of the term bussy, were a gauntlet and the fact he’s still a sweet guy today is a testament to his character

[mathewschaefer]

can anyone riddle me why tortorella is just 'a hardass' and babcock is like universally acknowledged as abusive when even more players hate playing under tortorella and they sound practically identical

[mathewschaefer]

the larkin thing fills me with disgust lol all these crybabies just want to chase the cup with their maga buddies down at the beach in a place where nobody gives a fuck

[mathewschaefer]

I’m developing an immunity to hockey names but every now and then it hits me just how breathtakingly stupid some names are

[mattymartin]

↳ MAT BARZAL IN THE HAMPTONS | 5.29.26

[mathewschaefer]

That’s literally how I feel rewatching schaef highlights for a little pick me up on a bad day

[mathewschaefer]

Russian boy has russian accent 😨😨😨 don’t piss me off