matthew (simons).

“I Sing The Body Electric”

adambalan‌:

Adam went bright red at the mention of ‘tongue action,’ and was about to protest when Matt began to pepper his neck with kisses. It felt so good he couldn’t help but close his eyes and let out a little moan. One of his legs seemed to move of its own accord, wrapping around the back of Matt’s thigh and pulling him in closer, Adam’s hands, now free, coming up to cup the back of Matt’s head, tugging at his hair. “I trust you,” Adam breathed, opening his eyes to look into Matt’s, his heart skipping a beat as he did so. “I trust you,” he repeated, and he closed his eyes again as he pulled Matt’s head down to his for another kiss.

From the male’s little moan, the feeling of their bodies mutually being pressed together, and given the other’s trust while being pulled into a kiss gave Matt all the confirmation he needed to continue what he was doing. Adam, to Matt, was one of the most devout Catholics in their class and it was ironic how the two of them were on the bed committing the biggest sin known throughout Catholicism. Matt didn’t care about that one bit. He had too many hormones to care. His attraction to Adam, or guys in general, seemed too normal for it to be wrong. He kept himself engaged with their kiss the moment Adam had pulled him in for another one. His lips gently brushed over the other male’s, even throwing in a gentle nibble to them whenever he needed to catch a breath. His hands found their way down the side of Adam’s body toward the ends of his shirt and his finger managed to creep their way into his shirt and onto his skin. The deeper he kissed Adam, the further his hand went up his shirt. He pulled his lips away with an evident smirk, “You’re a good kisser. I’m quite surprised.” Matt couldn’t help but to tease.

“I Sing The Body Electric”

adambalan‌:

“What—what do you mean, more?” Adam asked, squirming a little again, but stopping quickly when the friction became too much. “You said a kiss, I—I kissed you, didn’t I?” It was only Adam’s second kiss—his first one had been with a girl at bible camp, and it had been all braces and hot dog breath. Not exactly anything great. He didn’t want to admit to himself that even a brief kiss with Matt was a hundred times better. Because kissing guys, that wasn’t normal or okay, at least according to what he’d been taught. Except Matt was his best friend, and Adam trusted him. And his lips had been so soft… “Do you want me to… try again?” Adam asked, wetting his own lips nervously with the tip of his tongue.

With a humorous overly dramatic sigh, Matt couldn’t help but to continue his teasing. “Yes, Adam. I wanted more from you. You know, a lil’ tongue action or somethin’.” Matt couldn’t help but to let out a devious little snicker. He was severely overstepping boundaries that weren’t meant to be crossed with a friend, let alone a male friend. His blue hues intended to stare into Adam’s eyes, but caught a glimpse of the boy’s tongue licking his lips. It made Matt’s grin widen, which made him even more eager. “I mean… only if you trust me, Adam.” he stated with his humorous tone. As Matt leaned himself in, almost as if he was going to initiate a kiss, he instead went for Adam’s neck. As his lips hovered over Adam’s skin, he breathed softly over it. “If you trust me and allow me, I could really show you a thing or two, y’know? I could really rock your world.” Matt murmured before he began to place a trail of light kisses along Adam’s neck. He lifted himself just enough and completely let go of his Adam’s wrists so his friend could push him off if he desired. Matt knew he had given his sales pitch and it was all up to Adam’s response.

“Spark, and It’s Like Gasoline”

adambalan‌:

“None of us had citizenship, my parents were here on work visas and they got their citizenship later, but I didn’t have it either, so if they’d sent me back to Romania, I would’ve been stuck there,” Adam explained. “I guess I never really talked about that. I didn’t want people to think I was, I don’t know… not a proper American.” His nose wrinkled a little. The town they’d grown up in had been like that, a lot of conservative people who looked down on immigrants, even white ones. He clinked his glass against Matt’s for his toast before taking a sip as well.

Adam’s heart nearly ruptured until Matt admitted he was joking about being married. He let out a shaky laugh. “You’re such a dick.” It was classic Matt to joke with him like that, fib about it just to mess with him. “No, I mean, I… I’ve dated a few people but no.” His cheeks flushed for what felt like the hundredth time that night at Matt’s insinuation about him having a chance. “Don’t joke about that, man,” he muttered, though he was smiling despite himself.

It made sense to Matt why Adam never explained his family’s situation with him. While Adam was never obligated to discuss his homelife with anyone, Matt could imagine how hard it could’ve been for Adam to discuss his life with someone who couldn’t relate. Matt was seen as the poster child for being a typical clean-cut all American boy with a patriotic family. His family would glare at anyone who didn’t fit the citizen stereotype and would make snide remarks about those who didn’t fit the category. Matt wasn’t like his family however. As he had different views from his family, he was sent to Catholic school to “shape himself into a better American young man.”

Simply teasing Adam brought a nostalgic feeling to Matt. It felt like he was back in high school hiding under the bleachers with Adam. A quick wave of memories rushed through Matt’s mind of the times he used to tease Adam just to see him fidget and exhibit some adorable reactions. He couldn’t help but to smile to himself as he took a sip from his bottle. “I can’t help myself, you know it. I may have grown up, but I’m still sixteen at heart.”

“I Sing The Body Electric”

adambalan‌:

Adam’s breath hitched as Matt leaned in; when the tips of their noses touched, it felt like he’d been shocked with electricity. “A—a what?” he stammered, though he knew full well what Matt was asking for. Or at least suspected he did. “Um,” Adam said nervously, “okay, I guess.” His body tensed as he tilted his head up just a bit so his lips brushed Matt’s briefly, a dry and chaste kiss that nevertheless left him panting. “Okay, you happy now?” He strained a little against Matt’s hold on him, his cheeks burning under the other boy’s gaze.

The moment he saw the boy lean in to give him a kiss, Matt quickly closed his eyes and puckered his lips. He felt Adam’s lips brush a quick kiss against his, and when Adam pulled away Matt became hungry for more. It was a tease for Matt; something he had to work for and get out of Adam. A couple of seconds had passed once Adam pulled his lips away from his before he had opened his eyes and looked down at his friend who was still pinned underneath him. The grin on his face had dropped for a moment as he processed what Adam had said to him before it reappeared. “Aweee… Is that it Adam?” he couldn’t help but to tease. “I dunno… I was expecting... a bit… y’know, more from you.”

“Spark, and It’s Like Gasoline”

adambalan‌:

Adam chuckled dryly, but nodded. “Yeah. I mean, they can’t send me anywhere now. And I’ve got my citizenship, so that’s something, too. I mean, it’s okay. They honestly knew, after…” He trailed off a little awkwardly. After they found out about you and me. “I guess they just needed to hear it from me. It goes against everything they were taught, so I can’t expect them to understand. But I know they love me, so…” He shrugged. “That’s better than a lot of people. I’ve been lucky, really. And I’m glad that it went alright for you. Sounds better than what we both thought it would be like. For both of us.” When they were younger they’d been scared—Adam more than Matt, but it hadn’t been easy for either of them. Adam had definitely thought the worst, that he’d be ostracized, not to mention damned. But he’d come to terms with all that. If only things could have been different, maybe… “So… I mean, awkward question, but are you seeing anyone? I’m just… just wondering.” Adam flushed, but he was unable to help himself. If Matt was seeing someone, he needed to know right away—no nasty surprises. He needed to be able to prepare himself to see the love of his life with someone else.

“Hmm?” Matt couldn’t help but to perk up a bit at the mention of his citizenship. “Hold on… When did that happen? Why did I think you’ve always had a citizenship this whole time and your parents were just threatening to send you to some relatives in Romania?” It was a possibility that Matt could’ve forgotten that Adam didn’t have a citizenship (or it was possible that he was still an idiot) after all these years but he was still surprised at the bit of information. A quiet pause eased through the air before he slid in the tiniest congratulation whilst chucking into his beer bottle. He took a long sip of his drink as Adam continued to speak about his family and had looked away from Adam for a moment. Matt had remembered all of the precautions they had to take in order to be alone at school or in either of their rooms. It was silly to think about looking back, but it was their reality they had to face. They both had come a long way since then and Matt was proud of them. As he looked back at Adam, he extended his arm out to propose a toast. “Here’s to us. We really deserve this.. Especially you.” His lips formed into a gentle smile before he took a sip from his drink once again. Upon hearing the man’s question, Matt couldn’t help but to stare at Adam with pure amusement. Some things haven’t changed with Adam over the years and it was good to see the Adam he remembered back from high school. “It’s a good thing you asked me that because…” he set the bottle on the table, “I’ve been married for about three years…” Matt stared at Adam for a few seconds before letting out a devious chuckle. “I’m kiddin’ with ya~ No, actually. I’m not seeing anybody so you still have a chance if you’re single.” Matt gave Adam a playful little wink. He drew himself back after amusing himself. “It’s a good thing you asked because I was curious about the same thing with you.”

“I Sing The Body Electric”

adambalan‌:

Adam started to squirm at Matt’s challenge; he was determined to prove he could get free, but then the friction between them became unbearable and he froze, his face burning. Matt’s grin only made him blush harder. “What—what are you talking about?” he stammered, though once again, he had a feeling he knew just what Matt was implying and the thought was equal parts thrilling and terrifying. He struggled a little more, but gave up, panting slightly. “Fine. I can’t get free.”

At this point, it was practically impossible for Matt to contain himself from pouncing onto Adam. It must’ve been obvious that Matt was trying to insinuate some inappropriate behavior onto his holiest of thou classmate. As he let out a quiet hum, his grin widened as his devious and lewd thoughts raced through his mind. He knew he was going to get something tonight. “Oh Adam…” he sighed pleasantly as he kept himself on top of the male. “Adam, Adam, Adam…” The boys name came out teasingly as he lightly loosened the grasp on Adam’s arms just so he could feel the male’s skin in his hands. “You are a freakin’ cutie, y’know?” He boldly admitted with a chuckle. His pupils stared intensely into the other’s. “You know I get a prize now, right? And I think I know what that prize is going to be if you’re willing to give it to me.” He leaned himself quite close into Adam. The tip of his nose gently brushed against the tip of Adam’s nose. His grin widened, “Maybe a kiss?”

“I Sing The Body Electric”

adambalan‌:

Adam knew he was blushing when he heard Matt’s response. “What do you mean?” he asked, though he suspected they both knew what Matt meant. When Matt kicked him, Adam jumped onto the bed and started to wrestle with Matt in retaliation. Despite Matt’s comments about ‘tops,’ which had made Adam’s heart race just hearing them, Adam was the one on top—for now. “I swear, I’m gonna kick your ass this time,” Adam promised a little breathlessly as he struggled to keep Matt beneath him.

Matt knew that he could easily flip Adam onto his back and pin him down. It was no secret that he was a bit more strong than his friend, but Matt wanted to amuse Adam just for a little while before he completely shattered his friend’s ego. He kept an amused grin on his lips as he stared into Adam’s light colored eyes. The obvious pink blush had settled on the boy’s fair skin which only made Matt’s grin widen even more. “Cute.” Matt cooed before he broke himself out from Adam’s grasp. He pushed the boy off from him toward the side of the bed and quickly got on top of him and pinned his arms on both sides of his body. “So you were going to kick my ass? Tell you what, if you can get yourself free then go right ahead.” Matt challenged as he pressed his body on top of his friend and tightening the grasp around his arms. His grin then widen from ear to ear, “Ooooorrrr.... while you’re in this position, which is the bottom of me, you could do something that’s more.. convenient.”

“I Sing The Body Electric”

adambalan‌:

“Who made you the boss?” Adam demanded, aware of how silly and juvenile his words sounded and not really caring. He gave Matt a push, two hands braced on his back and shoulder so the other boy was thrown off balance. A laugh escaped Adam’s lips at the image. “I wanna be in charge for once. You always choose everything.” He kicked at Matt’s leg as he said the words. His heart was starting to pound in anticipation of Matt’s reaction.

It took Matt by a little surprise when Adam had pushed him. He fell back onto the bed as he let out a small gasp. Matt didn’t find himself injured (not that Adam could even injure him) but rather amused at what just happened. When he found himself lying on the bed, he let out a devious laugh. He couldn’t help but to increase the volume of his laugh while Adam demanded authority. It was unbelievable how foolishly adorable the boy was. His mind couldn’t help but to wander into the subliminal messages that he found in Adam’s words. “Oh. You wanna be in charge, hmm?” he lifted his head to look at Adam with a grin. “It’s pretty adorable how you wanna take charge of me but lets be real here… The only person who can top me, is me and the only person who can top you, is me.” his lips curled into a grin as he kicked Adam right back.

“Spark, and It’s Like Gasoline”

adambalan‌:

At the prolonged eye contact, Adam squirmed a little in his seat, taking a gulp of his beer to give himself an excuse to look away. It was so intense to look into Matt’s eyes after all this time apart. He’d never been able to forget those blue eyes and the way they had made him feel. The way they still made him feel. Like Matt was looking right through him, right into his soul. It had always been both wonderful and awful at the same time. Maybe especially now. He swallowed his beer, took his time answering. “Yeah, I did come out to them. They… didn’t take it well. I mean, they already knew, really, but they didn’t want to accept it. So we kind of lost contact for a few years but then about two years ago now they reached out and we’ve been in touch since then. They’re…they’re trying.” Adam worried his lower lip with his teeth, adding, “It’s still weird between us, though. It’s just… not something they were raised to understand was okay.” He shrugged. He knew Matt could understand that; it had been hard for both of them, being raised the way they were. “Anyway, it’s fine. I waited until after I moved out to tell them, so…” He gave a half-hearted chuckle. A part of him still wondered if they would’ve kicked him out had that not been the case. It was a painful thought.

It was a cue for Matt to look away from Adam when he saw his former friend break their eye contact, which he decided against doing. Instead, Matt narrowed his eyes as he watched the man take a sip from his drink. He watched the daze in Adam’s eyes as the man tried to word his response to him and his eyes caught on the movement of his neck as he swallowed his drink. It was a touchy subject for them to discuss, sexuality as a whole was a difficult thing to discuss for anybody let alone struggle with sexuality in an unsupportive environment. Matt wanted to tell Adam that he didn’t have to answer if he wasn’t comfortable, but the man already began to speak so he couldn’t propose his offer. He felt his face fall ever so slightly when he heard how his family didn’t take the information lightly. In a way, Matt figured that would’ve been the case given how he remembered the man’s parents reacting toward him and their relationship years ago. As Adam progressed his tale, Matt’s lips crept into a small weak smile, “Well… at least they’re trying.” he looked away from Adam for a few seconds to process what was presented to him. He looked back at the man and extended his arm to propose a toast with a soft smile, “After all these years, we’re finally not living a lie anymore. Here’s to us?”

“I Sing The Body Electric”

adambalan‌:

When Matt leaned in closer to him, Adam’s pulse quickened. And he sort of felt as though Matt was trying to insinuate something with his words—but he was probably just messing with him, of course. Adam tried to laugh it off, but he knew he was still pink in the face, and he couldn’t resist giving Matt’s arm a shove, partly joking, partly out of frustration with how he was feeling with the other boy so close to him. “Your taste in toppings sucks. So no, I don’t think so.”

Matt couldn’t help but to let out another laugh as Adam shoved his arm. He couldn’t help but to find amusement in the boy’s attempt to have the upper hand against him. It was quite adorable actually, it was almost like a puppy attempting to defend their home with a weak little bark. God, Adam was a cutie. “Excuse me?” Matt questioned playfully. He raised an eyebrow as he slightly pulled his body away from Adam. “If I’m paying for the pizza, then I get to choose the toppings.” he demanded with a light tone as he reciprocated the shove to Adam’s arm with slightly more aggression.

“I Sing The Body Electric”

adambalan‌:

Adam couldn’t conceal his blush when Matt mentioned him being on his knees—if only his friend could read his mind, he’d probably never speak to Adam again—but he managed to roll with the punches easily enough and his voice was even when he responded to Matt’s question. “Yeah, I’m hungry. Except if we’re ordering a pizza, you’re paying.” He gave Matt’s shoulder a nudge, a good deal more aggressive than the one Matt had just given his foot. He felt a little silly doing it, but it wasn’t like they hadn’t roughed around like this loads of times before. It wasn’t a big deal, and it was kind of fun. What was the harm?

It was obvious– a little too obvious, that Adam was being just as playful as Matt. He knew that his friend was pretty much on the same level with his teasing and Matt wanted to ever so slightly take things up another notch. “Oh–” Matt let out a slightly over dramatic exclamation as he raised his hands in front of his chest, “well alright then; excuse me.” as he brought his hands back down to his sides, he let out the tiniest laugh. His front teeth bit down onto his lower lip as he glanced at Adam’s soft looking lips. He really wanted to kiss the boy’s lips, but he still wanted to figure Adam out before he made any moves. It was really tempting to say the least. As he brought his eyes back to Adam’s, he brought his back away from the way from the wall to lean closer to Adam. “Say I do pay for the pizza, do I get something in return? Maybe… I could choose what pizza we’re going to eat or something?”

“Spark, and It’s Like Gasoline”

adambalan‌:

Adam smiled. “Of course I remember. And oh really? Listen, I can be good with words… when I’ve had a chance to rehearse them a few times.” He grinned. At Matt’s admission, he faltered a little, however. “You—oh. Yeah, that’s good. I mean, were they supportive and stuff?” Adam knew he’d stammered a bit, but it was just a surprise to hear Matt talk about his sexuality so casually. Of course, it made sense—they were both adults now and there was no need to be so secretive about it when they didn’t live in such a conservative area. But Adam’s own struggle with coming out had been complicated with regards to his family, and things were still a little strained between them. When they were younger, Adam had envied Matt for having parents who seemed far more easy-going than his own, immigrants who were raised by strict parents themselves and often made Adam feel smothered and trapped.

Matt remembered how shy Adam was back in high school, especially whenever he would flirt with him. It was a daily game to make Adam flustered enough to see his face turn pink, and from what Matt could remember, his blush was quite adorable. Matt could tease Adam enough to see if his blush was still adorable (which it probably still was), but he decided to remain civil. He already had a jab at teasing Adam and wouldn’t want to make him uncomfortable with more of it. He directed a smile toward Adam to show his support, “Good for you. You’ve always been quite articulate?” he tilted his head to the side to contemplate if he had chosen the right word. “Yeah, articulate.” Matt nodded his head and let out a light chuckle. He brought the bottle up to his lips to take another sip but paused when he heard Adam’s response. “Eventually. It was hard for them to wrap their heads around the idea, but yeah. They don’t really have an issue now.” He shrugged his shoulders while he took a quick sip from the bottle. His eyes narrowed as he looked deeper into Adam’s eyes as he tried to figure out how to ask Adam the same question. He knew how difficult it was for Adam to face his sexuality and his religion when they were in high school and wanted to approach the question sensitively. Matt cleared his throat, “How… about you? Clearly you’re not in Romania so that’s a good sign, right?”

“I Sing The Body Electric”

adambalan‌:

“Oh believe me, I pray for your sins every night,” Adam joked, but he was partly serious. Adam’s parents were a little wary of Matt as it was—Matt was charming, likable, and polite, but it was like his parents had a sixth sense for someone who wasn’t as devout as they were. When Matt nudged him, he let out something embarrassingly close to a giggle and nudged him back, harder. “It’s Catholic school, Matty. Of course they have to quiz us on it. It’s part of the curriculum.” He cast a sideways glance at Matt, taking in the way his profile looked with his head resting back against the wall. His friend was so handsome, sometimes Adam felt like God had placed him on earth just to tempt him. But he wouldn’t give in—Matt didn’t see him that way, anyway. And whatever Adam was feeling was temporary, probably. Just hormones and confusion. It was normal. Or at least, that’s what Adam told himself.

Whenever Adam had teased him, Matt’s lips couldn’t help but to creep into a smug grin. He had to give Adam some credit, it was quite adorable to see his friend tease him so confidently. Matt knew he could simply tease Adam right back and watch him flare an embarrassed pout. A quiet chuckle escaped from his lips as he once again nudged Adam with his foot with more aggression, “Mhm, I’m sure you do– on your knees and everything!” Matt partially joked as he raised an eyebrow toward Adam, “and I know you like being on your knees for the Lord.” his chuckle increasing in volume. He pulled his leg away from Adam when his friend nudged him back. His eyes were still fixated on the male. God, he was adorable. “Well, if you believe and love the Lord then why should you be quizzed on it? Like your knowledge on this stuff shouldn’t define your faith.” Frankly, Matt wasn’t too keen on this Catholic stuff compared to his friend. He was only attending the institution because his family assumed it provided discipline and excellent education. It was stupid honestly. “Anyway, I’m kind of hungry. What about you? We could order a pizza or something.”

“I Sing The Body Electric”

adamfagan‌:

“You’re right,” Adam admitted with a chuckle, removing his bible from his lap and setting it aside. “I’m getting mixed up now anyways. We probably could use a break. But it better only be thirty minutes.” He grinned at his best friend. “Last time you were distracting me so much we didn’t get back to it at all. And we’ve got a test coming up,” he reminded Matt as he stretched out his legs from their folded position and cracked his back. Truthfully, a break sounded great. He’d been reading the same line over and over for some time, a sort of odd buzzing in his ears that only happened when he was around Matt for some reason. He didn’t want to think too much about why that was, only so far as Matt being a bit of a bad influence—but Adam didn’t mind that. Matt could be the biggest sinner on the planet and Adam would still be grateful to be in his presence. Only because they were such good friends, of course.

While Matt watched Adam set his bible to the side and stretched his legs out, his eyes narrowed at how the male stretched his legs out. He noticed how skinny and smooth Adam’s legs were and Matt found them quite attractive. Matt found Adam attractive, every single inch of him. His eyes made their way back to the male’s innocently adorable face just as Adam made his comment on being distracted during their last study session. Matt raised an eyebrow and a small grin crept onto his lips, “Or else what? You’re going to pray for my sins? I didn’t hear you complain last time we studied together.” a playful hum escaped from in between his lips as he nudged Adam gently with his foot. He rested his head against the wall and released a sigh, “Why do you think we have to be quizzed on this stuff? I understand this is important, but it’s not math...”

“I Sing The Body Electric”

@adamfagan

“Wait a second…” he narrowed his eyes at the open page of his bible, Matt flipped the page back and forth in confusion. “I thought we were reading First Corinthians. How are we already on Galatians?” he looked over at Adam with a confused look on his face. Matt wasn’t interested in bible study whatsoever. In fact, studying was the last thing he wanted to do tonight. The only reason why he even agreed to bible study was for Adam. He could tell how devoted Adam was to his faith, which Matt couldn’t blame at all. They both went to Catholic school after all.

Although Matt had intentions to finally make a move on Adam, he wanted to play his cards carefully. He wasn’t blind to the glances he caught from Adam. In fact, Matt had the speculation that Adam was just like him– attracted to guys. Tonight was his night to figure that out. He released a heavy sigh as he leaned his back against the wall. “Do you think we could take a break for a bit? I’m sure the Lord won’t hate you for having thirty minutes of free time.”

“Spark, and It’s Like Gasoline”

adamfagan‌:

Adam felt his cheeks burning again when he caught Matt staring at him, but he tried not to read too much into it. It had been ages, Matt was probably just processing. It didn’t have to mean anything, even if Adam wanted it to. At Matt’s mention of the veterinary office, he lit up. “You’re a vet? That’s awesome. I remember how we used to talk about vet school and stuff back when… you know.” Adam bit his lip for a moment before answering Matt’s question. “I went to Purdue, majored in communications, and I was in Indianapolis for a while before I moved here. Nothing too exciting really.” He took a sip of his beer as well, mirroring Matt’s actions without thinking about it. “How’s your family? Do you visit home much?”

“You remember.” with a hopeful tone to his voice, Matt smiled as he perked up his body. He couldn’t believe how Adam even remembered the fact he wanted to become a veterinarian. It wasn’t an impossible career, but he always imagined himself starting his own veterinary for all household pets. While he hadn’t opened his own business, he found a career which made him move to the city and it was just as rewarding. “I was given the opportunity to study the wildlife in Taiwan a couple of years after I graduated, but I didn’t go… reasons, you know?” Matt looked down at his lap and gently shrugged his shoulders. “Communications, hmm?” surprised, he glanced up at Adam and took another sip of his beer. “I wasn’t expecting that to be honest.” he let out the tiniest chuckle. “Family is good. I came out to them eventually; which wasn’t a surprise to them actually.”