[medievalsquid]

When you make too much food and you begin to regret it halfway through but you got yourself into this mess and you're gonna get yourself out

[medievalsquid]

Don't do drugs kids. #drugs #faces

[medievalsquid]

Life is like Danny DeVito. Short and fantastic

#Danny DeVito #Thomas Sanders #sandersides

[medievalsquid]

THE PUSH TAB WORKED!!! 😱😱 #macaroni #magic

[medievalsquid]

I was at Chick-fil-A and before I could finish saying thank you they said my pleasure. I feel violated.

#rude #coconut #yeahalright

[medievalsquid]

Screw tradition I want my door back.

#promposal

[medievalsquid]

I bought a crime scene

#oops

[medievalsquid]

When you start to die, don't.

#life hack

[medievalsquid]

You can't scoop fudge while driving

#fact

[medievalsquid]

Mr Diamond your barkalounger is on line one

#my father everyone

[medievalsquid]

I need one of those monkeys but I'm too poor

#same

[medievalsquid]

BREAKING NEWS: Elephant bro team destroys human cancer cells

#elephant bro team

[medievalsquid]

If worse comes to worse sugar daddies are an option.......

Let's get studying

#school

[medievalsquid]

He doled out justice like a ripe pineapple

#no context

[medievalsquid]

I'm pretty sure I was supposed to be an orca

#identity​ crisis

[medievalsquid]

I have never experienced a truly funny 9 year old.

#truth

[medievalsquid]

Our pear tree was killed by a rouge trampoline

#windy