[lifeafterpsychiatry]

Your best is what you can do without harming your mental and physical health, not what you can accomplish when you disregard it.

[thegirlthatcriesacademia]

All my grief says the same thing— this isn't how it's supposed to be. And the world laughs, holds my hope by my throat, says: but this is how it is.

Fortesa Latifi, The Truth About Grief

[unfollowing]

[cupidjoy]

https://www.instagram.com/p/CR-HBUjH9wm/

[smokefalls]

“When someone dies, everything about them becomes past tense. Except for the grief. Grief stays in the present.”

— Angeline Boulley, Firekeeper’s Daughter

[minoritiesinpublishing]

“My story came to me when I was 18. And then life happened. And I didn’t start writing it until I was 44. And when I was 54,I got an agent, sold the book at auction, optioned the film rights to the Obamas at Higher Ground for Netflix. And that my book comes out in two weeks, and that I’m 55… Never give up on your dreams. [My book is] striking a chord with people. I’m doing this and I never thought I would. And so I’m really happy that something about the story is striking a chord with people who are like, you know what, for as long as we’re alive, let’s keep dreaming and doing and not letting ourselves be what holds us back.” –Angeline Boulley

[himynameisslimsadie]

Hey y'all it's been a while! Who's still with me?

[softears]

[dispatchesfromtheclasswar]

[haelxtii]

[disturbedlolita]

[sunflowerssandmedusa]

[spanky15113]

[neurodivergent-noodle-deactivat]

this took me far too long to learn, so I’m going to tell you something that you need to internalise.

you don’t have to tell people anything you don’t want to tell them. it’s not rude or disrespectful to be private about things. you don’t owe anyone that information, so how could it be wrong to withhold it?

queer but don’t want to come out? don’t!

have a trauma disorder but don’t want to tell people what your trauma was? don’t!

disabled but don’t want to talk about it? that’s right, simply do not!

practice telling people to go away when they ask invasive questions.

the responses I’ve been using in particular are “that’s between me and my therapist/doctor”, and “why does it matter to you?”

you don’t need a “reason” to want to keep things to yourself. you don’t need to tell someone your entire history so that they can label you as “valid”.

don’t tell people information you don’t want to share.

[thesnadger]

Since once in a blue moon I actually discover a decent rule for adulting, and since I know I have followers a few years younger than me who are just entering the workforce, I want to tell you about a very important phrase. 

“I won’t be available.”

Imagine you’re at work and your boss asks you to come in on Saturday. Saturday is usually your day off–coming in Saturdays is not an obligation to keep your job. Maybe you were going to watch a movie with a friend, or maybe you were just going to lie in bed and eat ice cream for eight hours, but either way you really, really don’t want to give up your day off.

If you consider yourself a millennial you’ve probably been raised to believe you need to justify not being constantly at work. And if you’re a gen-Z kid you’re likely getting the same toxic messages that we did. So in a situation like that, you might be inclined to do one of three things:

Tell your boss you’d rather not give up your day off. Cave when they pressure you to come in anyway, since you’re not doing anything important.

Tell your boss you’d rather not give up your day off. Over-apologize and worry that you looked bad/unprofessional.

Lie and say you’ve got a doctor’s appointment or some other activity that feels like an adequate justification for not working.

The fact is, it doesn’t matter to your boss whether you’re having open heart surgery or watching anime in your underwear on Saturday. The only thing that affects them is the fact that you won’t be at work. So telling them why you won’t be at work only gives them reason to try and pressure you to come in anyway.

If you say “I won’t be available,” giving no further information, you’d be surprised how often that’s enough. Be polite and sympathetic in your tone, maybe even say “sorry, but I won’t be available.” But don’t make an excuse. If your boss is a professional individual, they’ll accept that as a ‘no’ and try to find someone else. 

But bosses aren’t always professional. Sometimes they’re whiny little tyrants. So, what if they pressure you further? The answer is–politely and sympathetically give them no further information.

“Are you sure you’re not available?” “Sorry, but yes.”

“Why won’t you be available?” “I have a prior commitment.” (Which you do, even if it’s only to yourself.)

“What’s your prior commitment?” “Sorry, but that’s kind of personal.”

“Can you reschedule it?” “I’m afraid not. Maybe someone else can come in?”

If you don’t give them anything to work with, they can’t pressure you into going beyond your obligations as an employee. And when they realize that, they’ll also realize they have to find someone else to come in and move on.

[yournewapartment]

IMPORTANT!! PLEASE READ!!

[kagetsukai]

Just like with many other parts of life, learn to say ‘no’ to people. You are important. Don’t kill yourself for another person, esp. if they are your boss.

[fairycosmos]

i NEED to sit by the SEA and FORGET that i’m ALIVE

[adhdtho]

your 20s are about fucking up your hair and getting long overdue medical diagnoses actually