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NORMAL TOGETHER (1)

pairing: frank castle x fem reader

warnings: none really? this is set right at the beginning of the punisher season 1 so mentions of death, frank as pete, yearner frank, lonely frank, neighbor reader, fluffy, sorta stalker frank, not proofread, pls let me know if i missed anything !!!

wc: 2.1k

a/n: my first series ever yayyyy!!!!!!!! also my first non david corenswet character fic lol sorry papa.... m getting into my the punisher rewatch for the first time since i was like 13 and im falling in love with my frankie all over again!! to be honest idk how consistent im gonna be with this, how long its gonna be, etc etc.... but i hope to be consistent and not go ghost with this too lol ..... anyways, pls send me any reqs/ideas u may have for the series if u have any im all ears !!! :)))

even now. he wanted to live a normal life. he wanted to be a normal guy. no more punisher. no more frank castle. everyone that needed to be dealt with was dealt with, and he was ready to live the rest of his life in a lie, as pete castiglione. a lonely construction worker. that was it.

he’d even started going to veteran support groups. he wanted to make a change for himself. he wanted to silence all the voices that had plagued his mind for years and years on end. he just wanted, for one second, to be able to relax. to not busy himself with killing someone who wronged him. to not look over his shoulder. to not spend more nights with blood on his hands than not.

but frank oozed loneliness, he couldn’t help it. everyone around him could see it. he just had that look about him. his eye bags, hobo beard, unkempt hair, chronically tense shoulders.

curtis was the first person who found the courage to tell frank to his face: maybe he needed a girlfriend. someone to talk to. someone to hold. someone to love. someone to make him seem normal. someone to make him feel normal.

curtis tried easing frank’s worries about his wife, telling him it didn’t necessarily need to be serious. if frank, or pete, wanted to seem like a totally not suspicious, totally not dangerous guy, he couldn’t just be the typical nightstalking brooder he was. those guys were so easy to read. maybe, curtis reasoned, if he had a girlfriend, an alibi to his normalness, someone to soften him up a bit, he could just pass off as an average joe. it was a stupid reasoning, but frank took it into account all the same.

but how could he betray maria like that? he’d done all of this for her. it didn’t feel right. however, frank did put a lot of thought into it. maybe curtis was right. maybe he did need a girlfriend. he didn’t know where to start looking. he hadn’t done the whole dating thing in years. but he hoped that if this was true, if this was meant to be, then the woman would come to him naturally. if not, he had no problem confining himself to eternal solitude. he wasn’t even a guy that necessarily believed in fate, but it was easier believing in that when it came to this. just leaving it up to whatever higher powers that may be.

you were in a somewhat similar situation when it came to your love life. you were in your early 40’s, still single, and nothing had stuck. there was just something about you that always attracted assholes, liars, manipulators, every negative quality a man could have, you dated one with them.

by the time you were in your mid-30’s, you gave up on the idea of marriage and kids. not that you’d ever really wanted that, anyways. you had cats. three of them, that you loved with your entire being. that was more than enough. besides, as a librarian who reads to kids three times a week, you spend enough time around kids. you didn’t want any more around home.

you, much like frank, were very perpetually lonely. growing up, you constantly wondered if there was something wrong with you. if your aura or something carried some sort of repellant that kept people from even wanting to look your way. you’d accepted it early on, not letting yourself dwell on the “what-ifs” of your social life, trying to protect yourself and your feelings.

you didn’t have friends, not really. you didn’t have girlfriends that you went out to sunday brunches with. you didn’t have people calling up every now and again, checking on you. your phone was chronically dry. every now and again, maybe your mom would call, but other than that, your phone was practically useless when it came to communication.

you’d accepted your future. an old, bitter, cat lady who’d spend all her time sitting on her porch, hissing at everyone that walked by. you even looked forward to it at times, as pathetic as that may sound.

unlike frank, however, you didn’t let your loneliness sour up your life. you tried to find pleasure in everything, leaving the pain for when you were tossing and turning at night with nothing else to listen to but your thoughts.

you had fun going to the grocery store and stocking up on cat food. you had fun walking to work every morning and walking back, passing by the bakery that had pastries so vibrant they made your eyes burn, always stopping to look, but never buying. you had fun volunteering at the homeless shelter every weekend.

unlike what frank felt about himself, you were a good person. the exact kind of person he needed.

even despite the happy front you put on, you always felt like your loneliness was a burden. a curse. maybe you’d wronged someone in a past life. maybe you were just unlucky. who knows?

but that loneliness did bring one positive thing into your life: frank’s attention. you lived in the same building, next door to each other. as soon as curtis put the girlfriend talk into his mind, frank had begun noticing every woman in his age range around him, mentally evaluating them to see if they’d be good for him.

that was when he noticed you, admittedly for the first time, despite living right next to him for months. the first thing that stuck out to frank was simply your looks. he thought you were pretty, simple as that. then, he noticed how quiet your apartment was. every now and again, he’d hear a meow from one of your cats, or the soft sound of your tv, but never voices. never company. just you, your tv, and your cats.

you did notice frank long before he noticed you, but you’d never actually spoken to him. never a good morning in passing. not even a half-assed wave or smile. that was the way you moved past life most of the time, like a ghost, don’t speak unless spoken to.

you, of course, thought he was handsome. even a blind person could tell he was hot. tall, wide, buff. the beard and long hair definitely helped. you had a thing for guys like that, rugged. but you never thought too much about it, dating wasn’t your thing.

but as time went by, frank began paying a lot of attention to you. he almost felt like a stalker at times. he knew your routine by heart. he’d hear your shower turn on at 6:15 am sharp every morning. by 7:00 at the latest, you were out the door. you always packed your own lunch, usually a simple sandwich, and you’d bring a big stanley filled with ice water and a slice of lemon with you to work. you weren’t a coffee person, noted.

you would then walk three blocks down, catch the train downtown, then go to work. you worked monday through friday, 8:00-5:00. you were never late, never called out sick, a disciplined woman. he also noticed you went grocery shopping every wednesday, right after work. you’d always cook your own dinner, but every now and again, you’d allow yourself the pleasure of ordering takeout.

then came saturdays, where you’d spend the entire day at the homeless shelter. then on sundays, you’d usually spend your entire day holed up in your apartment, watching movies, maybe leaving to go for a walk around the block, but nothing too exciting.

but never, not once in your very carefully crafted routine, did you ever go out with others. no friends. no leisure time activities. sometimes, you’d go to the movies alone, frank noticed, but that was as fun as you were going to get.

after a good two weeks of frank silently watching you and analyzing your lifestyle, he came to a realization: if he were to have a girlfriend now, he would want it to be you. you looked normal enough. you could be normal together.

he found the courage to actually speak to you a week after his grand realization. it was a wednesday night—grocery night. the elevator in the building had been under construction, leaving you to haul the bags up seven stories to your apartment. frank had coincidentally—he definitely didn’t change his work hours to match yours—arrived home at the same time as you.

he was about two stories of stairs below you, his hands admittedly getting a little clammy at the mere idea of actually talking to you, but he was a big boy. he eventually cleared his throat and climbed up the stairs, two at a time, effortlessly.

“‘s-scuse me, ma’am, need a little help with that?” he gruffly asked, prompting you to whip your head around to find the source of such a rough, gravelly, sexy voice.

who were you to turn down the help from your super hot neighbor who you definitely didn’t have a little crush on?

“oh! yes, actually, i’d appreciate it so much—” you immediately responded, a smile gracing your features, the same smile frank had admired from afar. without another word, frank stepped forward and took the bags from you, effortlessly hauling them up the remaining five flights of stairs.

neither of you spoke as you climbed up the stairs. even though he’d been thinking about this moment for a week straight, frank didn’t even know what to say. but somehow, neither of you felt forced to speak, forced to fit in a little small talk about the weather or how annoying the elevator construction was like you would with other people. the silence felt natural, it felt correct.

you didn’t speak until you arrived at your door, turning to frank once you unlocked the door and took the bags from him. he didn’t want to push his way inside your apartment to set them down, not yet. “thank you… wait, i just realized, i don’t even know your name! isn’t that silly, we’ve been living next to each other for, gosh, what is it now, 6 months, 7–”

“pete.”

“what?”

“pete. my name is pete.”

your eyes lit up at that, that same beautiful smile spreading across your lips once again. you nodded, introduced yourself as well, before retreating back into your apartment.

despite being sworn off love, you couldn’t help but replay the interaction over and over again in your mind. you were sure it was nothing. he was just being kind, that’s it. but the less rational part of you was already fantasizing all sorts of crazy romantic things with your stupidly hot neighbor pete.

you had absolutely zero idea that right next door, he was going through the exact same turmoil. even despite telling himself he wouldn’t get too serious, that having a girlfriend would simply be a coverup to make him look normal, that he wouldn’t feel anything for you, he was already growing incredibly attached.

all he’d done was carry your groceries for you, give you his fake name with a stiff nod and a grunt, but it felt like the start of his new life. that night was the first night in years that frank didn’t have any nightmares.

every single night, without fail, he’d shoot up in a cold sweat at the exact same time, after seeing maria’s death in his dreams all over again, always feeling too real.

but that night, there was nothing. but to him, that nothingness was peace that he had been searching for all this time, peace he thought killing every last person responsible for maria would bring him but never did.

it was you all along. he felt so pathetic, so guilty. he was a married man. he wondered how maria would feel. would she be jealous? would she want frank to be a monk forever? would she want him to move on? would she be happy for him?

for once, however, he found himself not caring, as selfish as it may sound. he hadn’t even asked you out. all he did was carry your groceries up the stairs. and yet, it was the happiest moment in his life since maria.

he would work on getting to know you more in the coming weeks, of course wanting to eventually ask you out. but he was finding it incredibly hard to keep himself as detached as possible, emotionally speaking. he couldn’t even hold back the smile that grew on his face at the thought of you.

was this it?

was this fate?

were you the one?

frank didn’t know. frank didn’t care. all frank knew was that he needed to start planning on asking you out immediately, before you could slip away from his fingers, before you could leave him, and he couldn’t wait.

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