m e l a n c o l l i n e

Perpetually sad girl tries to be happy.

[melancolline]

Chapter 28 has come to a close. A year of profound sadness and loss. A year defined by reckless hope, prayers half answered. I spent many of my nights and days sick with sadness and grief. But I'm still here for Chapter 29, knowing that I resiliently lived through the last chapter with as much strength, heart, and kindness as I could.

Life is full of discomfort, of challenges, and struggles. some of which come into our life unexpectedly, and some which our of our own making.

But if you're willing to go through them, to face those challenges you'll come out wounded. But, surviving and healing from it you can become stronger, more experienced, more knowledgeable. But that's only if you want to and are ready to face the discomfort of growth, the struggle of healing. Nobody tells you that healing is not easy. I think we have these ideas that healing is a time of rest, of taking it easy, of passively letting time smooth over the wounds. But it's not. Time helps with the progress, but you still need to monitor and take care of the wounds so that the healing goes smooth, that infection doesn't occur, that you don't reopen it and have to start all over again. There is still rest, yes, but there is also the work of making sure your environment, actions, and mindset are primed to help you heal. There is rehabilitation too, reintegrating yourself back into fulfilling and quality life after an injury.

Chapter 28 was the year of challenges, of loss of loved ones, of hurt by loved ones. But also of forgiveness, of compassion, and courage.

[melancolline]

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A cover of "i hate u i love u", originally by Gnash, ft. Olivia O'Brian Thank you to Piano Karaoke for providing the instrumentals. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xGifhxpRiDM

[melancolline]

If I am worth anything later, I am worth something now. For wheat is wheat, even if people think it is a grass in the beginning.

Vincent van Gogh