I can't draw at work so quick Kelvin/Keefe hurt/comfort writing to keep busy, night shift altering my brain chemistry aghhh.
Summary: Keefe and Kelvin feel the aftermath of the roundtable discussion
Title comes from the song I Root by Michael Nau
“Home sweet home.”
Keefe let them sit in the silence for a moment before steeling himself again. “Kelvin?” He reached out to place a gentle hand on Kelvin's arm but it only caused him to tense up under the touch.
No answer. Fair enough, it was dead silent the whole trip home and it's all silent now but for the chirps of crickets on the compound. Keefe looked to his right at his partner in the passenger seat, who was virtually curled in on himself facing away from him. He ran his palms against the sides of the steering wheel, trying to swallow that dread rising up into his throat. He hated this, hated seeing Kelvin like this. He didn't deserve any of this. The guilt was almost too much to bear for himself in particular. He promised Kelvin he'd have his back, he said he'd never let anything hurt him. How many times must he fail Kelvin before it becomes too much for both of them?
Keefe moved his hand away quickly. “I'm sorry. Let-Lets get you inside, okay? I'll get you some hot tea started.” He hopped out of the driver's seat and scrambled to Kelvin's side to open the car door for him. By the time he got there, Kelvin's face was beet red again, he was stifling tears. It took everything in Keefe not to cry right then and there with him. “M’sorry Keefe.” Kelvin heaved through the tears.
“Nonono- you have nothing to apologize about! That Simkins, well… he was out to get you for sure.” Keefe insisted. Kelvin just shook his head in response. When he helped Kelvin out of the car, Keefe held him their whole walk back inside the house.
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“They all laughed at me, Keefe I-” Kelvin spoke shakily as Keefe came back holding a piping hot mug to where he was sitting at the edge of their bed. His eyes were wide open staring past Keefe at nothing.
“Hey now -” Keefe sat the mug next to Kelvin on the nightstand and kneeled in front of him to meet his eyes. “Those guys? They're just a bunch of bullies and-” “What if they're right? What if I'm a sham?”
“No... No.” Keefe said firmly. He reached up and held Kelvin's face in his palms. “God set you on a path and-” “Keefe, I can't do this.” “What?” “I'm not… I'm going to drop out of the running for Top Christ Following Man.”
Keefe felt his heart drop into his gut right then and there. “No, wha- You can come back from this, Kelvin!” He was near pleading with the other. “I believe you can. They just don't see the vision that we do with Prism.”
This pulled a kind of wheezy hollow laugh from Kelvin as he moved away from his partner. “It's over, Keefe. We can tell the discipes tomorrow.” The sting in his voice was ever piercing.
Keefe sat there on his knees, watching as Kelvin crawled under the covers, pulling the comforter up past his head. “As a matter of fact, why don't we just drop Prism too.”
Hearing Kelvin talk this way made Keefe physically ache. He wanted to take all of his hurt away so bad, take it and lock it away and throw it into the Atlantic.
“You don't mean that, Kelvin- I- The flock, they need you!” He said as he climbed up to sit beside Kelvin. He pressed his palms into his stomach , trying to gather himself before continuing. “...Hey let's just- nevermind all of that. Lets just- take an easy day tomorrow, okay?” Kelvin didn't answer, but it looked like he was curling his legs up under the comforter.
Keefe sighed softly and crawled under the covers with his partner. Maybe he couldn't keep all the hurt away but he could at least be a pillar of support when Kelvin did get knocked down. The roots to Kelvin's ever-growing greenery. He reached out and wrapped an arm over Kelvin who was facing away from him. He pulled himself close and pressed a soft kiss to the back of Kelvin's neck. Kelvin responded with a shaky exhale and reached to hold Keefe's hand in his own. Keefe squeezed his hand in return.
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