I've met this guy in the most unexpected way.
In a place where I can forget all the stress and pressure from work and life. It is a bittersweet story from start to end.
It all started in the boat where I decided to sit beside him. It was half intentional - challenging myself if I'm brave enough to sit beside a stranger of the opposite sex, and yes, I proved that I am.
I was drawn to his broad shoulders and droopy eyes, it was a weird combination yet I was smitten with him. Physically, yes, he's my ideal type, but what makes me more drawn to him was his manners. At first I thought that he was snobbish, but no, he's not - he's friendly and mature which I approved.
For all I expected the connection will be cut after that boat ride, but when we reached the harbor another weird circumstances happened. His group and mine were staying at the same resort, but what surprised me the most was that their tent are just meters away from our cottage.
Really, what a coincidence. Or should I call it fate?
Our groups joined an activity that will make us closer - but this time it was not fate's work, it was all my plan.
From the first stop, the mangroves. I was awed with the fine sand and eerie yet breathtaking structures. The place was supposed to be a resort, but the construction was held because of legal issues. While I was so lost because of amazement, I was caught off-guard, he appeared at my side uninvited and started a conversation. I was dumbfounded for a moment, didn't know what and how to answer correctly without exposing myself. It was just a small chat, then we get back on what we're doing.
When we’re getting back to the boat I made a bold move, I changed sit just to be close to him - for me that time, my thoughts were like "it's ok since it's just a summer fling”.
More memorable things happened that day before we call it a night.
This 2 day 1 night getaway was unstated. So we have to enjoy every second left before we pack up and leave the place. Then the infamous game started "123 pass", it is a game that needs patience, alertness and focus, the loudest and most fun card game that I ever played. We're like crazy kids that time, we don't care about the other people around, and we're playing like we know each other for so long.
Finally, on our way home, I decided to level up the game so I sat on his side again (away from our group), it was my last shot before we part ways. I really am making memories to the fullest here, so who cares? Since we won't see each other after this.
I was fooled, I thought I was the one with the upper hand, but he still got tricks in his sleeves.
I started the conversation about this and that which leads to exchanging numbers - which I didn't expect. He was the one who first gave me his number, then gets mine after, and his moves that made the kill? Is when he nudged me and took a selfie of us together.
I should really give him an award for his swift and deadly moves.
It's almost over, I'm preparing myself for the parting.
After deciding what and where to eat lunch, we ordered separately. I was the last one who had my order. So when going back to our table, I found out that he's sitting across mine which made me uncomfortable. I was planning to detach my feelings so why is he sitting there? The whole time I was conscious of my movements (how I eat) and I really can't look at him.
For the last goodbye, and to have no regrets. I watched him as he's saying his goodbye to everyone, then on his last goodbye, he looked at me and his smile shifted. That smile that gave my heart a turmoil, it was the prettiest childlike and carefree smile that I see. A smile that says, "thank you for the memories".
After that, the feeling was bittersweet.
From the first to second week after our fateful encounter, I was hoping to receive a message from him - I was holding to the little connection we have.
If you were to ask me why I didn't initiate to message him? For me, I think I've done enough in creating the connection from the first time I sat to his side, so this time I want to know if he's willing to continue the connection.
Third to fourth week, I was praying and asking for signs because I was at my limit. I'm on the brink of giving up when I received a message from an unknown number. That time I was praying that it was him, and so the prayers are answered.
I was giddy the whole time for the connection was rebuilt. I have high hopes, thank God, I waited.
The future was blurry, but I was hoping that he is really the answer to my prayers. We became friends in Facebook and tried to stalk his profile a little. As I dug deeply, I found out a lot of interesting things about him and our similarities as well.
Days passed and I started to open up to my friends about the situation I'm in. I want to take everything slow and know him better before I jump the gun, but there is something that is bothering me which I can't pinpoint. My intuition tells me that there is something wrong, so I tried to dig again on his profile and then I found out that there is someone else. He has a girlfriend.
Really, the universe is so cruel but I still do respect and trust His decisions. I feel that the universe keeps telling me to be patient, and it's weird how I found out everything after I drew our constellations, quoting "The stars are pointing you to me, yet he tells me to be patient”.
Now that every card is revealed, there's no more reason to continue playing. Because #1, I don’t have the permission to play with the deck for those are not mine; #2, I was an uninvited player; #3, It is against my rules to cheat nor to be cheated.
We don’t know what will happen next, so this time I’ll just wait again for a new game to start, OR I'll wait for my turn to play - for this kind of game is just a 2-player game.