@theartofmadeline
Andulka
hello vonnie
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JBB: An Artblog!
Show & Tell
taylor price
NASA
Discoholic đȘ©
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Not today Justin
shark vs the universe
Misplaced Lens Cap
JVL
if i look back, i am lost
AnasAbdin
trying on a metaphor
will byers stan first human second
⣠Chile in a Photography âŁ
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@mercurial-machine
Haha Blake is a Cat (Part 30)
Blake: *throwing ninja stars*
Zwei: *happily trying to catch them*
Blake: âNo dog, NO! We are not playing fetch! I am trying to hit you with these ninja stars and kill you! These are not fun times for you, dog! These are dark times!â
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Jaune and Weiss Dress Like Knights
Ruby: "Do they have to be this way every time they spar?"
Yang: "Apparently."
Jaune, in full armor: "THOU MOTHER ART GAY!"
Weiss, also suited up: "NAY, THEE!"
If I Washed My Dick...
Jaune: "I asked her 'if I washed my dick, would you suck it?'
Jaune: "She was like 'What the hell? No!'"
Jaune: "So I called her a 'dirty cocksucker'. She laughed so hard that she ended up giving me a blowjob out of appreciation for the joke."
Yang: "Wow, that's uh... good for you?"
Jaune: "Yeah my sister's weird."
Awkward Meeting
Ruby: "So, you're really a 45-year-old virgin?"
Jaune: "Yeah."
Ruby, looking between herself and the other girls: ... "Wanna change that?"
Jaune, shrugging: "Why break the record now?"
Yang, harsh whispering in Ruby's ear: "You're losing him!"
Haha Blake is a Cat (Part 33)
Jaune: "I like your cat ears. They really suit you."
Blake: "Because I'm so cute and lovable, and yet cool and aloof at the same time?"
Jaune: "No, it's cause you're lazy as shit."
Dragonslayer Prank War
Yang, happily married to Jaune, very pregnant and in an elevator full of people: "So, when are you going to tell your wife about me?"
Jaune: *deadpan stare*
Yang: *shit-eating grin*
Jaune: "I can't, you know she's going through chemo right now."
Yang: "Well we should at least tell our mom about us."
Jaune: "Look, we'll tell her after she gives me the kidney I need."
Yang: "You need another kidney?"
Jaune: "What? I get hungry."
Strangers: *horrified stares*
Whatâs It Like
Sun, looking over at Yang:Â âDang, youâre dating her? Nice! Whatâs that like?â
Jaune:Â âYou ever had a migraine and an erection at the same time?â
It would be funny if Jaune genuinely forgets Cinder's name.
Mama Cat
Blake: *Sneaks out of her house during the day*
Jaune: *Walks out the door while carrying their infant daughter in his arms. He sternly stands by the porch and proceeds to let their child do the talking*
âMAMA! MAMA! MAMA!â
Blake: *Begrudgingly does an 180Âș and marches back to their house after hearing the cries of her daughter*
Jaune: âYouâre not for the streets, Blake.â
Blake: âShut up.â *Walks back inside*
Inspired by this:
†Instagram â https://www.instagram.com/ideclarefun/My second channel â https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdQ0T90Zp5ZsC2ugs8bBILgCredit: http
Blake: *outside jaune's house*
Jaune: the fuck is that? Is that a fuckin cat? Ren! There's a weird fuckin cat outside!
Dog Jaune: You okay Yang?
Yang: *laying face down in her bed* Yeah. Just had a rough day.
Jaune: Well, luckily I'm here to turn your rough day into a ruff day.
Yang: ...
Who You're Fighting
Oobleck: You know, there's an old joke from the Great War that goes as such. You can identify an unknown force by firing one shot and judging the response.
Oobleck: If the unknowns respond with precise, regimented rifle fire, they are Valian.
Oobleck: If they respond with heavy machinegun fire, they are Mistrali.
Oobleck: If they respond by charging your position, they are Vacuan.
Oobleck: If nothing happens for a few minutes, then your whole position gets leveled by an airstrike, they are Atlesian
Oobleck: But, if they respond by impregnating the entire female line of your family, they are an Arc.
The Class: ...
Jaune: ...I do have a lot of cousins...
Yang: Ugh... I hate rocking horses. The back and forth motions. It's basically a game of Mario Party.
Jaune: Or me with your mom.
Yang: Â *sees Jaune sitting on the couch*
Yang: Â Yo.
Jaune: Â Yo.
Yang: Â Have you seen rainbow butt?
Jaune: Â *shrugs*
Yang: Â Where is she?
Yang: *walks away*
Ilia: Â *decloaks nude in Jauneâs lap*
Ilia: Â *looks about nervously*
Weiss and Jaune are on a mission and came across a bomb. Weiss is trying to defuse it while Jaune is reading bomb defusing 101.
Jaune: âOkay how many wires are there?â
Weiss: âThree wires, one red and two white.â
Jaune: âWhat?â
Weiss: âOne red and two white Jaune!â
Jaune: âWhat color is the red one?â
Weiss:...
RWBY:*goes outside*
Ruby:Hey Ren, what are you doing?
Ren:Watching Jaune fight grimm.
*Jaune ursaâs in the distance*
Weiss:Why arenât you helping!
Ren:He said he wanted to do it himself. Donât worry, Nora is close by if he wants help.
Yang:Thatâs risky, he doesnât even have a gun.
Ruby:Heâs Fine. (Please be fine!)
Blake:Has he really gotten skilled enough for this?
Jaune:*combines sword and shield*
Blake:Thatâs pretty cool.
Yang:Iâm not convinced.
Jaune:*Throws sword into ursa*
Yang:See now heâs defenseless!
*shield rips it in half*
Yang:Oh thatâs good shit! Fuck em up Jaune!
Jaune:*pins it to ground*
Yang:Damn. Hey Weiss, itâs your dream from last night.
Weiss:Excuse me!?
RBR:Is it?
Weiss:No! I donât dream of Jaune pinning me!
Yang:I was talking about you mumbling about a grimm.
Weiss:âŠ
Ren:Youâre swirling with pink.
Weiss:Donât look at me with your evil eyes!
Jaune: Blake, I need your help with Pyrrha.
Jaune: Sheâs so much hotter and cooler than me that Iâm worried I wonât be able to satisfy herâŠ
Jaune: âŠyou know what I mean? đŁ
Blake: Sorry, but no. The last time I gave anyone bedroom advice a friend got hurt.
(See this post for context!)
Jaune: *sets a gift card for all-you-can-eat sushi bar on the table in front of her*
Blake: âŠ
Blake: *pockets the card* Okay, so weâll start with technique. Let me see your tongue!
ââââââââââââââââââââââ
Pyrrha: *lying in a hospital bed wearing a back brace* đ”âđ«
Jaune: *at her bedside* đą Please forgive me! I wish Iâd known!
Ren: I wish our team could go more than a week without having to visit the nurse for sex injuries.
Nora: And I wish I knew where Jaune and Pyrrha keep getting their over-the-top sex instructions!
Blake: *peeking in from the hallway and jotting down notes* Apparently, itâs also possible for someone to literally blow someoneâs back out during sex!
