I thought of something for Metallica Daycare. Imagine all the things they thought they would have to say to another human. Example, "Stop licking the wall." or "Stop picking your nose." If you need more examples, just look up "funny things parents say to their kids" or "weird things parents say". Love ya.
these are a goldmine!! i’ve picked out seven of my favorites for each seven band members of metallica. get ready to laugh, kiddos. love ya too, eak.
let’s set the scene. it’s lunchtime, spaghetti is on the menu. most of the kids are eating, chit chatting, and generally being a mess. (you know how kids are when they eat. it’s like a bomb exploded). kirk is on lunchtime duty. his one job? watch the kids. he’s doing his job very well, when suddenly, he spots a troublemaker. “get your spaghetti out from between your toes and keep eating.” he says. the kid in question does exactly that.
theres two kids fighting over toys. as kids do. the toy in question? a stuffed elephant. “let go of his elephant. get your own elephant.” the kid shrugs and lets go of the elephant. as you do.
oh lars. poor lars. he’s in charge of the tables. one of the new kids tell him “you look like a girl”. lars sighs. “i’m not a girl”
cliff is an enigma to the kids. they think he’s a robot. in actuality, he’s very organized and efficient. they draw him as a robot, and give the drawing to him. “thanks,” says cliff, “now, i have to go plug in my battery. beep boop.”
dave sets the microwave on fire. the kids are in equal parts horrified and fasinated. he puts it out, then says “don’t tell cliff i set the microwave on fire. the microwave is fine.” (but cliff finds out anyways. kids can’t keep their mouths shut.)
the kids tend to push jason around. its kind of a thing. not his fault. he’s just too nice. one of the kids tell jason that his hair is too long and he should cut it. “i’m not going to cut my hair for you,” he says. “i like it long.”
robert’s a bit quiet around the kids. if there’s naptime, they all tend to nap around him. one of the kids say “you’re a pillow.” he replies, “i’ve never been called a pillow before.”
