Young people are too invested in the comically unreasonable dream of having a full time job, making enough money to not waste their life thinking about budgeting for necessities, living in something other than a cardboard shoebox, and having like 3-4 friends who they actually like and who care about them. Instead they should be thinking about networking, producing content, optimizing workflows, and training their body into the perfect commodity
pairing dean winchester x ex-wife!reader
fandom supernatural
word count 4.2k
warnings mdni / 18+, angst, smut, porn with plot, timeline wise somewhere between s8 & s9, dean is still john’s son at the end of the day, of course he can’t give up the hunter life, [adele voice] divorce babe divorce, italic flashbacks, brief sam appearance (flashbacks), girl dad dean winchester, champion yearner dean winchester, oral (f and m receiving), p in v
notes this started as a simple “dean still yearning for the mother of his daughter” fic but then i got carried away
in the beginning, it was perfect.
you were the one who finally got dean to settle down and leave the hunting life behind; you two got married almost a full year into his retirement, welcoming a baby girl in the following year. it was the picture perfect-white picket fence-cookie cutter lifestyle that dean always believed was out of reach and unrealistic for guys like him. it was natural for him to step into the provider role from years of taking care of sam and his love for you was practically second nature. it was never performative how he prioritized his two favorite girls, always genuine.
“let’s get married.” dean says as he slips an arm around your shoulders. you tilt your head up to look at him with a raised eyebrow, slotting your bookmark as you close and set your book to the side.
“i’d say yes if you asked me properly.” you tease him as you shift your body to face him slightly, slotting perfectly against your boyfriend as he pulls you as close to him as possible. “you don’t even have a ring and you’re not in front of me on bended knee; what kind of proposal is this?”
“i thought you didn’t care about all that crap?” dean mutters into your hair as he leans his head against yours. “you said as long as i don’t put a ring in your food-“
“i still don’t. i was just giving you shit.” you lean in to press a kiss to his cheek as he rolls his eyes at you, a giggle leaving your mouth as you pull away. “i’m pregnant though.”
dean scoffs quietly and rolls his eyes at you again, fully prepared to protest another round of your sarcasm before he noticed you lean over towards the nightstand, opening the drawer to pull out what he soon recognized to be a positive pregnancy test. dean’s eyes widened and he blinked a few times, looking at you for confirmation.
“you’re-“
“pregnant, dean. i’m pregnant.”
“she’s got your eyes.” you and dean are looking down at your baby girl who’s wiggling nonstop in your arms, toothless grin on her face as she coos.
“but she’s just as cute as her mama.” dean teases with a chuckle as you roll your eyes at him. “soon enough she’ll be big enough to help me work on baby.”
“dean, you are not putting our baby to work as soon as she starts walking.” he’s got a defeated look on his face as you scoop her into your arms, her tiny hands reaching for your loose strands of hair. you replace your hair with your finger and she latches her tiny hand on almost immediately, her face lighting up as you play with her.
dean watches the two of you and can’t help but feel his heart swell at his two favorite girls, a moment he thought that he was cursed to never have. ever. you showed up and changed all of that for him and he would spend the rest of his life proving that to you, and now to his baby girl. he would put his life on the line for his girls without question.
“okay i won’t have her work on baby, but there’s nothing that says she can’t learn how to hunt-”
“dean. you’re pushing it.”
“okay, fine.” he throws his hands up in defeat. “still wanna teach her how to shoot. you don’t know what people are capable of these days.”
that’s why you couldn’t fathom how in three years time that you’re now signing divorce papers. you should’ve known that a hunter doesn’t really ‘retire’ and at some point dean would get that urge to slip back into the life. the first time was forgivable because when you get that itch, you have no choice but to scratch. it was when his resurfaced hunting habits started to make you feel like the only one in the marriage and the only one raising your daughter that the strain was beyond repair. you were losing the love of your life and everything that the two of you had managed to build outside of his old lifestyle, just for him to turn around and jump right back into the life he had put behind him.
the final straw was the day he disappeared without a trace. he wasn’t answering his phone or responding to texts, not to mention that he hadn’t been home in days that were bordering on weeks. sam had called right when you had considered filing a missing person report to reluctantly break the news that he was in purgatory, and that he had no idea if he could get his brother back this time. it was a reckless decision on dean’s part knowing that he had a wife and daughter at home and it hurt not knowing if he’d even be around for most, if not all of his baby girl’s milestones.
you told yourself that you were gonna stop waiting up for him. it’s the last thing that the bastard deserved, but old habits tend to die hard.
dean winchester was a hunter before he was a husband and a father and you knew that going into the relationship. it was years of push and pull before he finally decided to settle down, and it took even longer for him to feel comfortable with the idea of proposing and being a dad. he wouldn’t have been able to go through with it if he didn’t have you by his side, but that urge to hunt was bound to rear it’s ugly head sooner rather than later.
it wasn’t bad at first, a few local cases here and there with a guarantee that your husband would make it home safe and sound when it was all said and done. those local cases graduated to a few days at a time before it’d be a whole week before you’d hear from him, which was another layer of stress on top of raising a year old baby girl. but here you were sat at the dining room table as you waited for dean to walk through the front door, your daughter fast asleep upstairs.
dean knew if the light was on by the time he got home that he was in big trouble and there was no question in his mind that you were furious; he was rolling into the driveway at two in the morning and it didn’t cross his mind once to call or send a text, getting caught up in the hunt with sam that he’d jumped back into his pre-domestic habits of neglecting his own wellbeing. it didn’t register until the drive home that he had other people to worry about outside of himself and sam, that he now had a wife and a daughter at home and that these longer hunts weren’t gonna cut it for much longer.
you only cared that dean made it home in one piece and as soon as he walked through the front door relief washed over you, but it wasn’t enough to cancel out the anger of not knowing if your husband was okay or not. he met your eyes and before he could get the words out, you stood from your seat and made your way upstairs. you didn’t have to use words to let him know he was taking the couch tonight.
all dean wanted when he got above ground was a hot shower and to kiss his wife. the last thing he expected was changed locks and going straight to voicemail. sam had gone to hell and back and stood toe to toe with lucifer himself, but somehow telling his older brother that his wife wanted nothing to do with him was one of the hardest things he had to do, on top of convincing you to at least let dean still see his daughter. as much as he wanted to be upset that his younger brother was playing house with his family, it was better that sam stepped into his uncle role over some random stranger around his baby girl.
“what do you mean she doesn’t want to see me?” dean’s voice is rough as he turns to face sam with raised eyebrows, arms crossed against his chest.
“i think she just needs some time to adjust.” sam responds with a shrug. “i mean, everyone thought you were dead for months. that’s not something that you process overnight, dean.”
“but that’s my wife and my daughter. i have a right to see them.” dean protests.
“then what happens when you show up unannounced? she calls the cops and you get hit with a restraining order?” sam retorts. dean knows his little brother is right, but damn if he didn’t miss you and his baby girl. “just give her time. she’ll come around. she loves you too much not to.”
“you think if i called her instead that she would be willing to to me at least?” dean suggests. “s’not like i’m showing up unannounced.”
“like i said, give her some time. she had to adjust to you being gone and to have you pop up like nothing happened would probably give her whiplash.”
“i want a divorce.”
the last four words dean was expecting to hear when you two finally reconnected. he should’ve seen this coming a mile away between the hunts and being sent to hell but it was still a punch to the gut. he didn’t bother arguing because he knew you well enough to know that you weren’t relenting in your decision and that it was final.
and it wasn’t like he was delaying signing the papers on purpose. hunting was the only thing that was helping him cope with the reality of losing his family, then you add the layer of his brother suddenly missing his soul and trying to get it back. he promised that the next time he and sam cycled through your neck of the woods that he would finally suck it up and put pen to paper, but he would only grant you the divorce if you kept him updated on his daughter which was a fair agreement on both sides.
you both knew that at some point your daughter was gonna ask why her dad was always gone on “work trips” or why he can’t show up on certain holidays or why mommy and daddy don’t kiss like the other mommies and daddies, but right now the priority was to co-parent and try your best to give your baby as normal of a childhood as possible.
his baby girl who keeps getting bigger and looks more like him with each passing day, which makes it harder to move on despite the fact the divorce was long finalized by now. the post-purgatory years had been good to dean winchester and you couldn’t pretend that your ex-husband wasn’t looking better with time. he was slowly morphing back into the dean that you first fell in love with all those years ago and you just couldn’t get your brain and your heart on the same page. your daughter would cling to his leg during pickups and drop offs at your place and it would take everything to not ask him to stay the night, but you always sent him back with some leftovers to hold him and sam over until the next time.
“can daddy spend the night this time?” your daughter looks up at the two of you with those big eyes, practically hanging off of dean’s shirt with her tiny hands. you start to speak before you lock eyes with dean and cut yourself off, matching his nervous smile; neither of you could deny your baby girl’s wishes and if she wanted daddy to sleep over, he would sleep over. you and dean exchanged a look and he shrugged apologetically, mouthing a ‘sorry’ in your direction.
“yes, daddy can spend the night.” you don’t break eye contact with dean, watching both his and your daughter’s faces light up. god, she was such a spitting image of him down to her tiny little personality. your daughter cheered and dragged her dad by the hand down the hallway to her room, shaking your head as you head to your own room.
after an hour there’s a knock at your bedroom door and dean with a tired smile on the opposite side.
“she’s knocked out. tuckered herself out after a round of barbie theater and a few bedtime stories.” he slides his hands into his pockets as he leaned against the doorframe. “i got invited to breakfast with something called a ‘bluey and a bingo’ though.”
“i’m surprised she doesn’t have bluey on all the time at your place.” you shake your head before walking over to the dresser, handing him one of his shirts and a pair of his pajama pants. “these were mixed in with the laundry. didn’t wanna get rid of them in case you didn’t make it out.”
dean pauses before he can get the words out, genuinely caught off guard by the gesture. his hand brushes against yours as he takes the clothes from you and it’s your turn to try and keep your cool, hand tingling from the contact. “g-guest room is down the hall.”
“right.” dean nods, turning to head in the direction of the spare room. you stepped back into your own room, immediately pressing your back to the door as you closed it, finally letting out the breath you were holding. it was obvious that there were still feelings on both ends but with co-parenting your daughter being the priority, those feelings never had a chance to get addressed properly. you couldn’t speak for dean, but you hadn’t dated anyone since the split and the eventual divorce.
you’re not even ashamed to admit that when it’s late at night and you can’t sleep, your hand slips between your thighs at the thought of him, wishing the fingers circling your clit was his tongue because there’s this one trick of his that you’ve never been able to recreate with your fingers and-
another knock pulls you out of your thoughts. you clear your throat before walking back over to your bedroom door, dean pushing himself off the frame and his lips immediately finding yours in a heated kiss. you’re caught off guard and you tense up at first, relaxing under his touch not long after. if dean had tried to kiss you a year ago, the palm of your hand would’ve met the skin of his cheek. right now he was taking your breath away like it was the very first kiss.
he breaks the kiss to rest his forehead against yours, the both of you breathing heavily as your eyes meet.
“i don’t know how much longer i could’ve gone without doing that.” dean’s voice is breathless as he confesses, hands cupping your face as his thumbs caress your cheeks.
“do it again.”
dean obliges almost immediately, backing you into the bedroom as his lips melted into yours desperately. he kicks the door closed behind the two of you before squatting slightly to hoist you up by the thighs, your legs wrapped around his torso as he carries you over to your bed. his lips never leave yours as he gently lays you back against the pillows, hands roaming over each others’ bodies and under t-shirts and pajama bottoms. dean’s lips trail down your jaw to your neck, stopping right under your ear to suck a mark as he rocks his hips against your core, bulge pressing right against your clit.
“dean…” you plea, bucking your hips up to meet his. he smirks against your lips, muttering an ‘i know baby, i’ve got you’ in return as he starts to trail his plump lips down your neck and chest, his large hands sliding your sleepshirt up your torso. dean’s mouth latches onto your breast almost immediately, not wanting to rush but wanting to make up for all the lost time. his thumb and tip of his finger roll and tease your opposite nipple as his tongue swirls around the other, still rutting his hips into your core and leaving you breathless under him, his mouth and his fingers alternating between nipples.
dean’s lips trail further down between the valley of your breaths and down your stomach, trailing kissing along the waistband of your pajama shorts. he hooks his fingers as he drags them down your legs, taking his bottom lip between his teeth as his eyes focus on your glistening cunt. your heart races as he settles between your legs and the two of you lock eyes briefly, your hand instinctively reaching to cup his face; a silent gesture of forgiveness and understanding between the two of you before he flattens his tongue against your cunt, a slient cry of pleasure leaving your lips. his mouth engulfs your clit as you squirm and tighten your thighs around his head, fingers tangling and tugging in his hair as he slips a finger past your slit.
“c’mon baby, i know you can give me one before i fill you up.” dean mumbles against your pussy, watching you squirm through his lashes before a second finger meets the first. he curls them against your sweet spot and a pleased groan leaves his mouth as your back arches, the moans leaving your lips almost pathetic sounding as your lower belly starts to warm up. you clench around his fingers and dean knows you’re close, attaching his mouth to your clit as he sucks and swirls his tongue, your release covering his lips and his stubble and his chin all over.
“so good for me. always so good for me.” dean mutters against your skin as he kisses back up your body before capturing your lips in a slow, sensual kiss, the both of you working to push his bottoms and boxers down. he sits up to pull his shirt off before stroking himself a few times, running the tip through your folds to tease you, your whimpers simply music to his ears as he pushes his tip past your slit, inching himself past your gummy walls at a pleasurable, yet agonizing pace. he pauses to give you both a moment to adjust, not wanting to rush a moment the two of you had admittedly been waiting for the other to give in for. you toss your head back against the pillows as he bottoms out, hips flush against yours before he drags his cock back, rocking his hips at a slow pace.
dean’s hand cups your face and captures your lips in a gentle kiss as his free hand finds yours, interlacing your fingers with his as you lock your legs around his waist, moaning at the much deeper angle. your head is spinning as his cock fills you and his lips kiss all over your face, tears brimming at your eyes as you’re suddenly overcome with emotion, his forehead resting on yours as his thumbs wipe your tears away. “i love you dean. missed you so much.”
“m’not going anywhere. gonna be here for my girls.” dean’s lips are by your ear as he speaks, biting at the lobe as you moan and whimper. his hand slips from yours and slides between your bodies, thumb circling your clit as he picks up the pace of his hips, the tip of his cock brushing against your cervix with each thrust. “can you gimme one more baby? s’been so long since you came with me.”
you nod before your head falls back against the pillows, whining as that familiar warmth pooled in your lower belly again, dean’s grunts and groans picking up as his cock starts to twitch. he slams his hips against yours as ropes of cum coat your walls, the both of you moaning in unison as your releases wash over you simultaneously, your lips finding his as you both come down and find your breaths. dean pulls you into his arms and rolls you on top of his chest, peppering kisses all over your face before holding you close to him.
“i didn’t break any sleepover rules, did i?” dean breaks the silence and you roll your eyes, lifting your head to look at him.
“none in my book.” you lean in to press your lips to his once, then twice, then a third time as a smile crosses his face. “this doesn’t mean we’re back together, you know.”
“i know.” dean sighs, gaze shifting to the ceiling.
a brief pause.
“but it could be a start.” his gaze shifts back to yours and it feels like his heart stops for a split second, slight relief washing over him at your confession. getting his family back has been the only thing dean’s cared about since getting out of purgatory.
“you mean that?” dean’s face and voice lights up as you nod, him leaning in to press a long, gentle kiss to your lips in response.
“we still have to have a proper conversation about it, but it’s not like we’re in that place from three years ago.” you confess after he pulls back, fingers tracing the anti-possession tattoo on his chest. you have a matching one on your left shoulder from when you first started dating because he made you get one, refusing to take ‘no’ for an answer. your protection was, and still is, his number one priority.
“babe, you know i hate tattoos.” you groan in annoyance, rolling your eyes at your boyfriend. he was firm in his decision and the one time that you didn’t have a say in things.
“i know, but it’s for your own good. can’t risk anything happening to you and i’m not there.” dean tucks your hair behind your ears before pressing a kiss to the top of your head. “in the worst case scenario, it’ll buy me some time so i can to get to you.”
“fine.” you sigh in defeat, crossing your arms across your chest. “you’re at least holding my hand the whole time and buying me a beer after.”
dean shakes his head at you with a chuckle. “i’ll buy you all the beer in the world if you stay alive for me to buy it for you.”
a goofy smile crosses your face. “deal.”
“i’ll take what i can get as long as it means i get my girls back.” dean smiles in content. “purgatory and hell are nothing compared to a life without either of you. i practically owe sammy my life for stepping up and taking care of you both.”
“i barely knew what to do without you and i really wouldn’t have known what to do without him. i’m just that our daughter doesn’t have to grow up without you.” you lean in to peck dean’s lips and you swear that you briefly see tears brimming his eyes as you sit up to straddle his lap, his hands sliding up your thighs to rest at your hips, the air thickening once more as the curve of your ass brushes against the tip of his half-hard cock.
dean runs his fingers up the curve of your ass to the arch of your back and back down, eyes trailing up and down the front of your naked frame, releasing his bottom lip from his teeth as you lean down to capture his lips in yours. this time around the kiss is more feverish, a lot sloppier than the first round as lips and teeth crash together. it’s your turn to kiss along dean’s jawline and down his neck, trailing your kisses down his chest. he hisses as you bite and suck around his nipples, kissing down his stomach until his cock was twitching in your face.
he watches through lidded eyes as you take his shaft into your hand, sucking in a breath as you run your tongue across his slit, the taste of his precum coating your tongue as you swirl it around the tip. “gonna show me how much you missed me?”
“mhmm.” you nod in response before taking him into your mouth, inching down until his pubes were tickling your nose, the groan that left his lips going straight to your wet cunt. you lift your head with a pop before taking him into your mouth again, finding your rhythm as the sound of your slurping and sucking mixed with his moans, taking his balls into your hand as you massaged. dean had a fistful of your hair as he held your head in place, lifting his hips to fuck your mouth as he threw his head back against the pillows with his eyes squeezed shut.
“jesus, fuck- goddamn.” dean breathes out as he continues to fuck your throat, the vibration of your moans adding to the pleasure of his cock. his breathing starts to shallow and his eyes squeeze shut, both hands now holding your head in place as he picks up his pace, fucking your mouth relentlessly as his cock twitches. his body tenses as he bottoms out into your mouth, the thick warm ropes of his cum shooting down the back of your throat as a long groan leaves his mouth. you slide your mouth off of him with a pop and he pulls you up into a kiss, resting his forehead against yours as he catches his breath.
“okay, now i’m really not going anywhere.” dean teases.
the most important virtues for the young woman are as follows: time theft, selfishness, orgasms, irreverence to authority, sacrilegious behavior, a questioning mind, and eating regular meals.
sending asks is so scary what if i sneezed on my keyboard and mistyped my entire adress and misgendered everyone and mispelled every single word and also typed my password into the message. what then. once the ask is sent who knows what it looks like. i couldve tyepd anything
listen we all know and love older dean but..what about younger dean- like s1 or even before that? Like just imagine him being soo toxic and such a playboy while youre trying so hard to tame him and keep him!! I need some toxic angsty headcanons idk it’d be so hot like hear me out
| dean winchester who's a nasty bastard !!
you’re always a drooling mess before you even see it.
you don’t mean to obsess over it– impressively thick, deliciously veiny, practically perfect in your wanton eyes– but you can’t help yourself. oral fixation to the extreme. it’s even better when he decides to exploit you for it.
he’s got his hands entangled in your hair, forcefully tipping your head back as he shoved himself into your mouth. doesn’t matter if you can take it or not, because you will. you always do. your mouth is slick with saliva, pretty much salivating as you begin to feel the stretch.
“fuck– can’t help yourself, can you?” he grins, thumbs ever-so gently pulling at the corners of your mouth to try and pry it a little more open. some fucked-up dental exam. “damn fuckin’ whore.. and all f’me.”
your whine comes out muffled, almost gagging on him as you try to agree with a timid head nod. he’s right, so fucking right, with your cunt clenching around nothing. meanwhile, your mouth is full and aching, and your feel yourself grow wetter in anticipation of him ruining you. and when he shoves himself further into your mouth, no warning of course, your first instinct to gag is replaced with your throat fluttering excitedly around him.
the underside? of his cock weighs heavy on your tongue, all jagged veins and swelling, and you suck just enough to make him gram, sucking air through his teeth in a tight hiss. he grips your hat, fingers scraping at your scalp, pushing you further and further down his cock. your nose is buried in the hair at the base, the musky scent that make you drip even harder on the dirty bathroom tile. spit gathers at the corners of your mouth, dripping down your chin and his cock, falling in time with your tears onto your tits.
“y’see how easy it is to behave?” he rolls his hips slightly, but fics your throat like he’s got something to prove. something to beat out of you. “you ain’t done ‘til i say you’re done.”
you hum, eliciting soft vibrations around his girth, the only way you can demonstrate how much you love this– the stretch as your mouth struggles to stay accustomed to his size, the control he has on you, using you like a ventriloquist’s doll. you claw at his sweat, fingers occasionally slipping from sweat. your bare cunt grinds on the floor, cold emanating from it like a burn to the skin, and you shiver. it’s embarrassing, shameful, how you behave, and yet, you don’t stop.
it’s worse when his boot presses down, hard, between your legs, your thighs, the midsole catching against your clit. you whimper around his cock, almost dropping him entirely from your mouth, but the strong hands in your hair keep you up. “uh-uh-uh,” he mutters, and through blurring vision, you can make out a grin that’s formed from twisted amusement. “you’re gonna fuck yourself this way– like the desperate bitch you are.”
and so, you do. there’s nothing else, that’s why, except to make a fool of yourself on some shitty bathroom floor, humping against material that smells of leather, gunpowder and blood. he’s too busy fucking into your throat to care about your discomfort. but you’re still getting off in this way– you can feel the undeniable, tell-tale signs of your orgasm coming, ready to aid you in your journey to a sexual rock bottom.
“aw, gonna cum, just from this?” he taunts, everything seeming so cruel and sweet about it. like he loves you, but really, he loves seeing you like this. “fuckin’ ridiculous, y’know that?”
you nod mindlessly, agreeing with whatever comes out his mouth because, hey, you’re not actually listening– yes yes i will do whatever you want whatever you say– unable to focus on anything but that white-hot build of your orgasm. and when it does hit, it’s nothing short of brutal. it’s like being drenched in cold water, that nauseating shiver that consumes you whole as your cunt convulses around nothing. you taste warm cum on your tongue, though, fresh and salty. at least you got something out of this.
he? well, he just smirks, almost politely. wolf in sheep’s fucking clothing.
bagsjakssh f1 official exposing that checo and daniel have the exact same amount of red bull podiums i am laughing so hard. you will never catch me say a good word about that FRAUD. daniels car exploded every weekend and he still managed 29. checo had the most dominant car of all time and only managed 29 REVOKE HIS SUPER LICENSE he is a god damn pay driver and A FRAUD
romaincrisis
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pixelskylines
