Day One - An exploration into âwhat ifâ something else had happened or a different choice was made. How would that change Maddieâs character arc or story?
What if Maddie never married Doug, and Buck had convinced her to leave him at the altar on their wedding day?
Sheâs actually doing it, sheâs actually leaving him. The realisation shocks her, as had the words âletâs get the hell out of hereâ when they had fallen from her mouth merely minutes before. She shouldnât be doing this, Doug is going to be so mad when he finds out and the thought of how heâs going to react terrifies her, but itâs that sinking feeling in her stomach that reminds her exactly why sheâs doing this. Because sheâs terrified; of this, of the thought of getting married and being tied to him forever, but most importantly, sheâs terrified of him. And despite everything, she knows that what sheâs feeling isnât right.
Her heart is racing as the taxi pulls into the bus station and she canât help but look over her shoulder, wondering if Doug has realised by now. Heâs got to, the ceremony was about to begin when her brother had stumbled into the dressing room and begged her not to get married, and if things had went the way that they were supposed to, she would already be down the aisle and exchanging her vows with the man she loves, or used to love, she thinks.
Sheâs not sure. This whole situation is so new and overwhelming and her brother must be able to see how badly she is shaking, because heâs quick to slip his hand into hers and squeeze gently, forcing a smile at her.
Itâs going to be okay. It has to be, she tells herself, because if sheâs wrong about the feeling in her gut that had made her agree to her little brotherâs pleas for her not to walk down the aisle, then she will be able to go back to Doug with no issues, and he will understand and forgive her. And if sheâs right about thisâŠwell, she thinks she already knows the answer to that. She thinks she already knows the truth, and maybe she always has. Her parents may have been bad parents, but they never hurt her; not physically, at least. They may have said their fair share of hurtful words, but not once did they raise a hand to her and she knew, the first time that Doug had done it, that it was wrong. But it was so easy for her to tell herself that it was okay, that she deserved it. Because sometimes people do that when they care too much. They overreact and they feel bad about it later.
Those were the same words that she had told herself every time that she had been hurt in some way, not just by Doug, but by her parents, too. She can remember telling her baby brother that exact thing when he was five years old and had crashed Dannyâs old bike, their parents arguing about it downstairs. Those words were like a security blanket for her, an excuse she used time and time again. But she doesnât think that she can excuse his behaviour anymore, and she wonders if Evan knew that.
âItâs for the best, you know? HeâŠhe wasnât good for you, Mads, a-and I couldnât sit and do nothing about it. You and me against the world, remember?â Heâs only sixteen years old, and yet, he seems so much older than that, a lingering sadness behind his baby blue eyes that she never wanted to see. Sheâs his big sister, his protector, and sheâs spent all of his life trying to fulfil her last promise to Danny - to love Evan and keep him safe. The first part was easy, so easy, and she doesnât think she could change anything about him that would make her love him even more. Heâs perfect and always has been ever since he was first placed in her arms when she was just eight years old, waiting excitedly next to Daniel after winning the game of rock, paper, scissors that theyâd had in the car to see who would get to hold him first. Sheâd tried her best with the second part of their promise, she really had. But she doesnât think it was enough, because he is standing next to her, arm around her shoulder and helping to guide her through the staring crowd over to the ticket kiosk, protecting her instead of the other way around.
She knows heâs right deep down. He never did like Doug and Doug didnât like him, either, but there was always a part of her that had hoped it was just jealousy of the other for being such an important part of her life and taking her attention away from them. Deep down, she thinks sheâs always known that there was more to it than that.
She would choose her brother over her boyfriend in a heartbeat, and both Evan and Doug knew it.
Before she even knows it, Evan is passing her their tickets and guiding her over to one of the bus terminals. Thereâs a coach parked up and people waiting, and she wonders whether the universe is on their side and this is how things are meant to be, because they are right on time and within minutes, they are seated and pulling out of the station. She lets out a breath she didnât even know she was holding, finally able to relax a little now that theyâre leaving. Theyâve done it, sheâs actually done it, and she chuckles pitifully at herself. âWhat are we going to tell everyone? Theyâre going to find out; mom, dad, Doug - how are we going to explain this to them?â
He sighs and she can see his nose scrunch up as he thinks. Itâs almost ironic, she thinks. Sheâs his big sister, he should be coming to her for advice and answers about his life, and yet, here she is asking him what she should do. âDonât tell them anything. Theyâll work it out by themselves, just - it should be up to you if and when you let them know, and itâs up to them how they react to that. But no matter what happens, you broke free and Iâm proud of you. WeâllâŠw-weâll figure it out together, okay?â
âYou promise?â She sniffs, trying so hard to hold back the tears that prick her eyes when he sticks his pinky finger out at her, as sheâs done to him so many times before now.
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