Dating Tips for military spouses
Are you looking for someone with kids the same age as yours? Attending an on-base playgroup, MOPS, hanging out at a popular playground or hitting the libraryâs story time may be a good start. No kids? Try a Bunco or Spouse auxiliary group. Religiously inclined? Protestant Women of the Chapel (PWOC) or its sister Catholic Women of the Chapel (CWOC) may be the perfect start. The most important thing to remember is this: only spend time in places that will be rich with your kind of people. If you donât want to be friends with someone who doesnât share your religious or policital views, either vow to avoid those subjects entirely, or only spend time with people who do.
When you meet someone you think could be a great match itâs easy to get too excited and scare them off. Do your best to play it cool. Wait a day or two to find them on Facebook and a few days more to casually suggest a play or coffee date.
Make your first date a success:
When preparing for your first date with a new friend, think back to what you would do if you were preparing to date a guy ⊠and then do the opposite. Who wants to be friends with someone who intimidates them? Keep the make-up and outfit low-key â somewhere between sweat pants and business casual. Keep the conversation to your families and, assuming she is also military, service experiences. Ask her how she met her husband. If you need to tell her your love story, make sure to keep it short and sweet. Save any and all birth stories for much, much later.
Women also donât like people who make them feel fat, so just be yourself and, for heavenâs sake, order that coffee cake.
Identify deal breakers early:
Canât handle people who are always late? Think always having pants on your child is absolutely necessary? Need to be friends with someone who has a spotless toilet? Keep a mental list of your personal friend pet peeves and make sure you ID deal breakers early and often. Nothing hurts more than thinking youâve found The One, only to realize that your priorities are completely different.
Save the life drama for later:
Donât spend your first few dates talking about how your husband drives you crazy, problems with your unit, the stupidity of other spouses, your crazy in-laws or any other host of problems. Save that stuff for when youâre actually friends.
If youâre pregnant and itâs not yet obvious (and assuming your date is not obviously pregnant) save all maternity conversations for later as well. Your potential new friend does not want to hear about how you got pregnant, names you are considering or any other medical drama. Wait until at least the third date to tell her you are growing a new human.
If your pregnancy is obvious and the subject unavoidable, talk about it briefly and then drop the subject entirely.
Skip the other drama entirely:
Gossip, backbiting and rank wearing donât look good on anyone. Need to offload that stuff from your brain? Keep a journal. No one wants to be best friends with a hater.
 Now â go and make new friends! Please share any of your personal friend dating tips below. We need all the help we can get.
Military Dating Site: Â www.MilitarySinglesConnection.org
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