Em Em

I'm a Welsh transgender lesbian writer, wife and mother. 27 years old as of the time of writing. I make incredibly niche art, including: - short works of prose about Pokémon Trainers interacting with (a) fakemon and/or (b) gym leaders based on fictional characters - Homebrew stuff for DnD, including races, magic items, monsters or sub-classes - Blog posts detailing pointless challenges in Pokémon games, with special care taken to describe how I decided on each Pokémon's nickname ...But mostly I just mess around reblogging a bunch of unrelated stuff seemingly at random

[femgirlfriend-moved]

when you enter a grocery store for 'a few items' thinking 'you don't need a cart' that's the devil speaking

[blushingallthewayhome]

Question for all my followers. How many of y’all are still wearing masks everywhere? And are you doing this because you’re mandated to or out of an abundance of caution?

[queerasflux]

listen. listen. the pandemic is still fucking happening. “abundance of caution” my ass. people are fucking dying every fucking day, of course I’m wearing a goddamn mask. Of course I am. I don’t want me to die, I don’t want my loved ones to die, I don’t want my asshole neighbor to die even tho I hate him. I’m going to wear the fucking mask until the plague stops happening.

[eosofspades]

[faustandfurious]

Whenever I read LotR and reach the battle between Eowyn and the Witch-king, I get the impression that the reason why the prophecy loophole works isn’t that the Witch-king is unkillable except for some illogical weakness nobody had thought about yet for misogynistic reasons, but that the Witch-king himself derives so much of his power from the fear he instills in others and from his own belief that he is unkillable. Eowyn doesn’t fear him, because she doesn’t fear death. When she twists his words right back at him, she’s not trying to exploit a prophecy loophole, she’s just making a play on the double meaning of the word «man» with fairly standard battlefield bravado.

But, crucially, it gets the Witch-king wondering if there might be an actual loophole in the prophecy. He starts doubting his own invincibility. There’s no logical reason why a woman might be able to kill him if a man cannot, but prophecies are tricky things. What if …

And this is what undoes him, in the end. This last minute doubt. The Witch-king, deep down, believes that Eowyn can kill him, thus making it possible for her to do so.

[faustandfurious]

The elves care about the prophecy. The Witch-king cares about the prophecy. All the old, powerful beings of Middle Earth play by the rules of prophecy and live by the logic of Norse Sagas and Germanic legends.

Eowyn marches up to the Witch-king like Jared (19), goes “that sign won’t stop me because I can’t read”, and because the storybook logic, the fairytale logic, of the prophecy allows for her kill him, the Witch-king as a creature of stories and nightmares has to play by his own rules and die by her sword.

[swan2swan]

Disney: “Mr. Hirsch, you’re not allowed to show gay characters in your children’s cartoon.”

Every Cartoon Creator for the Next Ten Years:

[normal-horoscopes]

You fanfiction people are insane. Y'all will say shit like “I hate writing original fiction, I prefer it when the characters have an established dynamic.” And then headcannon the characters to where their dynamic is completely different.

[normal-horoscopes]

“I like fanfiction because using an established world is a good shorthand for other readers!” And then write shit like “The avengers but they’re actually the starving orphaned children of a kindly french barrel maker during the 30 years war.”

[plain-flavoured-english]

Essentially we play with characters the way we used to play with Barbies

[gaslightgallows]

By dismembering them and swapping out the heads

[normal-horoscopes]

YES!!! KILL!!!

[normal-horoscopes]

Y'all. "Hell is empty and the devil's are here" is not one of those epic Tumblr quotes. It's from The Tempest. The Shakespeare one.

[apolloendymion]

remember when that furry post went around with "you have nothing to lose but your chains" and people were saying "this is such a raw ass line and it's from a furry post" but it's literally karl marx

[kajedheat]

When people thought Justin McElroy adlibbed "Rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic" and like. That saying has been around forever.

[neil-gaiman]

So In feet of clay, is there a reason sir terry pratchett chose to use golems as opposed to another mythical automaton? For example, the kratt is another Eastern European option. Why a golem specifically?

First of all, the kratt is an Estonian story, not Eastern European. Estonia is in Northern Europe, near Finland. Golems are from Jewish mythology, and not Eastern European.

It's obviously hard to speak for Terry, given that he's dead and we never really chatted about Golems vs kratts specifically, but I would hazard a guess that the reason that Terry wrote a book called Feet of Clay about Golems is because he wanted to, and got to explore Jewish/Yiddish myth in his own way, and the power of the written word, not to mention do some Yiddish jokes, and so the Golem lore allowed him to tell his story in a fashion that say kratt [who aren't made of clay, thus losing the book's punning title, but from household objects, and are brought to life by giving the Devil three drops of blood and not by writing things and/or placing writing in or on their heads, thus losing more of the book's themes, and who have to keep working and need to be given impossible tasks to destroy them] wouldn't have. Also, most people have heard of golems, but I had to stop and check kratt, and I couldn't name any other mystical automatons that would work in a Discworld setting that would have given Terry that plot.

Why this and not that is a hard enough question for any living author. I don't think it's answerable for a dead author. But I hope this has given you something to think about.

[iamthecutestofborg]

[intactics-deactivated20211231]

[trappedinavelociraptor]

#he's right but his neighbors fucking hated him probably

[killowave]

[kaedeakamatsu]

[etherealthief]

[lysanderish]

[milf-adjacent]

[daggryet]

this is such a bad idea it's almost worse than him planning to use nfts to promote #teamseas

[daggryet]

the funniest thing about this shitshow is that all the content creators he invited? they're the guards

all the contestants are random people, competing for money. random people who need money and so they compete in the squid games against other random people who need money, while content creators are the guards.

i have never seen the point of a show fly so high over someone's head than with squid game and mr beast, nooo media analysis in his brain

[hiveswap]

How can a human being be so fucking dumb

[the-missing-number]

[freshwaterbear]

Raise your hand if you've ever been personally gaslit by your own countrymen

[freshwaterbear]

[littlepinkbeast]

you know how most of the things humans use as spices are poisonous or repellent to most other mammals? and you know how anything vaguely d&d inspired has dwarves being way more poison resistant than even humans?

dwarf cuisine shouldn’t be bland, it should be unimaginably spicy and potentially harmful or fatal to humans. like green potato and rhubarb leaf salad with a festive garnish of yew berries and deadly nightshade berries, that kind of thing.

[the-rear-admiral-reborn]

Concept: humans think it’s bland cuz rather than memorizing what kills humans it’s safer to just pass on the spices.

[loreofcardigan]

#‘should we add salt? everyone eats salt right?’#‘no that’s a rock there’s no way humans eat rocks

[chewedcorn]

A Cut Above

[sabertoothwalrus]

hakoda borrowed it and forgot to give it back <3

[xenosagaepisodeone]

I love the idea of a machine that bleeds because it betrays the inherent purpose of something that was created for utility. It feels wrong in a way that is, overtly, horror, but also almost humanly vulnerable in the way that it’s something you’re not supposed to see within it’s indifferent, seamless plastic casing. An ongoing exchange of fluids is only necessary in living creatures because individual organs are incapable of maintaining function otherwise, machines circumvent this by virtue of their systematized functions. It makes sense for androids in fiction to leak some kind of fluid because it assists in characterizing them as human-like, and helps us empathize with them if they get hurt. If you saw a toaster with a central nervous system, it may as well be an alien because of the contradictory nature of its appearance. A toaster that bleeds adds a dimension of uncertainty that one would not expect from something that is presented as neutral, but is also stressfully knowable, because you also (presumably) bleed and feel pain. What I’m saying is that the inventor of the printer was a pervert.

[lgbt-tiktoks]

Caption: [Todays gender is the old person in the scary movie who reveals the spooky truth.

(using an older sounding voice) Gender? Why gender has been dead for 25 years…]

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

People say Tiktok is for kids but everyone on it over the age of 40 is the funniest person ever to exist