I AM FREE

I made this because im scared of my mutuals on my main blog judging me

[millmore]

Hello

Sideblog, I don’t want people who know me from my main blog to find out about this. Low to no empathy,I don’t want any friends and I am saying this now as yo not disappoint anyone. I try my best to be kind, I really don’t like judging.

This is mainly a confessions blog where I basically dump stuff I wouldn’t on my main blog. + talking about anime because ehh I don’t want to do that on my main blog

they/she/pawz/it+ more neopronouns

Vegan, proship and antitheist. I will not argue on this blog because it’s really just a place for me to drop my unpopular opinions .

[voyaging-too]

I've read a post about mental illness and manipulation weeks ago, and I keep turning it around in my head, because it addresses something that bothers me about tumblr mental health discourse, and its swing to and fro between two extremes. One: you aren't allowed to complain about this annoying or outright harmful behaviour because it might be a symptom of mental illness or neurodivergence. Two: people who claim their mental illness caused them to doing something truly heinous are always lying, mental illness doesn't make you do that. Mentally ill or neurodivergent people are either 0% or 100% responsible for their actions, they are either lil beans who are not to be blamed for anything, or they're evil liars in full control of their actions. We're not having the difficult conversations about mental illness as a factor or a mitigating circumstance, we're not trying to find those numbers between zero and one hundred.

But that's not even my biggest problem with the discourse! My problem is that the question of whether a person is culpable for their actions is irrelevant to whether another person has the right to draw boundaries with them. You can draw boundaries even if someone is hurting you completely unintentionally and without malice. A metaphor: if someone you love gets the Punch You In The Face Disease, where they genuinely, truly cannot help punching you in the face, you're not morally obliged to stay in punching range and pretend it doesn't hurt. It's completely reasonable to physically remove yourself and limit your conversations to the phone until they are in remission.

It is good to give people accommodations. It is good to be patient and understanding with other people's mistakes, whether or not they have a diagnosed mental condition. It is also good to have boundaries, whether or not the other person has a diagnosed mental condition. It doesn't actually *matter* if the he is mansplaining or if he's infodumping on his special interest, he's talking over you either way. It doesn't matter if she's flaking on you because she's an asshole or because she has ADHD, you're being stood up either way. You have a choice to put up with it or not, and that choice rests with you, not with them.

Note that I'm saying this as someone who fucked up repeatedly and badly in ways that are partially down to depression, anxiety and untreated ADD, but partly down to be me being a little shit. Me not being *completely* at fault doesn't mitigate the harm I caused, and I'm very grateful that I was mostly forgiven.

[loki-zen]

I think a lot of issues around this stuff especially wrt stuff like autism and ADHD is that you have parent-child relationships involved and with those, you really do have different obligations as a parent than as a friend or partner

[shamebats]

I know I was often aware in the moment that I was being abusive/manipulative but I couldn't help it, I felt this strong urge to act in ways that were harmful & hurtful to others that I couldn't resist most of the time.

My partner did stay around but he also established strong boundaries. I could be upset about something but that doesn't mean he'd stop doing it if it was something that was not harmful to anyone and beneficial to him, like going out with his friends when I was irrationally upset about it and wanted him to stop seeing them for some reason I didn't even understand myself. He wasn't mean about it, he just protected himself.

My father enables my mother's bad behaviors, defends her and constantly makes excuses for her and so she's only gotten worse with time. She's used to walking all over people and seeing no consequences for it.

Meanwhile, I was able to actually heal and get to a point where things are better for both me & the people around me. Thanks to everyone who didn't enable me. I also benefit from not being angry, scared, anxious and lashing out constantly.

It's not ableist to tell someone that their behavior (even when it's caused by poor mental health) is unacceptable and you're not going to put up with it. You shouldn't be an asshole about it or bully them but like if someone's pushing your buttons, taking advantage and being a dick to you... you're also human, if you react badly in return, they should have some understanding for you too.

You shouldn't have to always be the bigger person & take everyone's punches. You don't have to be a catholic saint. You deserve protecting too, even if you aren't the person with the worst trauma & mental health in the room.

[millmore]

I ❤️ lesbians who rape each other

[toonimal]

You people keep making posts about being pro-kink and pro-weird nasty gay sex but then moments later you're shaming fellow queers for ageplay or cnc or incest shipping and i'm sorry but it doesn't fucking work like that. You are not pro-kink if you're stricken with moral outrage at the extremely basic concept of people playing around with power dynamics. Get the fuck over yourselves.

[millmore]

“Why are you comparing oppressed people with animals?!??” No Im just saying animals are oppressed?? Jesus. Maybe stop being offended at the idea that any animal has value just like a human. Stop acting like it’s a truism that animals are naturally below humans, because there really isn’t a reason to think so.

[millmore]

You underestimate how dedicated i am to procrastination and nothing else

[millmore]

I am okay with not being someone’s first choice. I am so okay with that. I mean if I wanted to I should probably be more social and show interest in them but,, yeah luckily I’m okay with not being chosen ever.

[millmore]

I guess this is quite contradictory to avpd but let me explain. I accept failure far too easily. I always tell myself “I’m going to fail this and I’m okay with that” because i dont want to study. I am constantly stressed to the brink of my sanity but I am okay with that! Because it’s still better than eating, studying, hanging out, showering, talking, writing, doing anything. It sucks

[millmore]

I’m just going to write some fun intrusive thoughts my OCD caused me to have lately

‘These two men of colour are sitting next to you so it’s very important you don’t seem uncomfortable because that’s racist. But you’re also racist for thinking about them not being white. You are racist’

‘If you eat alone your going to choke and die never eat alone’

‘Eating around other people is embarrassing because you have ARFID. Don’t eat around other people they’ll hate you’

‘Remember that time there was a spider in class and you tried to set it free but a girl killed it before you could help it? Yeah it’s your fault the spider died. Spider murderer’

‘If you don’t pause a video whenever the time is 1:11, 2:22 etc Bad Things will happen. I will not elaborate what these bad things are.’

‘Ok so this person you hate can actually read your mind. Now imagine you having freaky sex with that person? Ok they now think you are in love with them and that’s your fault.’

[millmore]

OCD: see that wheelchair user over there? Tell them they should just eat more vegetables and then they’ll get better

Me: ok but that isn’t true and is also very weird for me to do

OCD: Yeah but you’re going to tell them that anyways. In fact you already have you just don’t remember it

Me: :(

[millmore]

I do love my OCD making me think of extremely detailed ways to insult random people and then be like: “oohhh you’re so going to be a bully now! You’re soo going to call them slurs any minute now”

[hemipenal-system]

tumblr secret: the weird mfs with super cancellable but ultimately harmless kinks are the coolest people on the website

[vanglaggle]

problematic is such a useless freaking word like people will be like "this creator is awful because they're problematic" like did they sexually assault someone or post fart fetish on a private account ANSWERS PEOPLE

[lemonlysunny]

Puppy🐶🍜

[agirl-obsessed]

[newtsnaturethings]

Kagome collects demon friends like Pokémon

[carnage-cathedral]

btw guys managing your symptoms also means apologizing for things you didn't mean to do. sometimes you do things because of your disorders that you genuinely didn't mean to do, but if it hurt someone you still have to take accountability and make up for the hurt you caused