Pairing: Yoongi x Musician!f.Reader
Recommended playlist: Slump(SKZ), Wishing on a Star(BTS), Stars and Raindrops(SKZ), Coffee(BTS), Hug Me(I.N), Dimple(BTS), Hoodie Season (3racha/SKZ), Chocolate (Day6), Love Senario(iKon), Blueberry Eyes(MAX), Can't Stop(SKZ), Blue Hour(TXT)
This is a work of FICTION, everything is made with creative liberty and is not meant to represent anyone/any true events.
Music. My best friend, my first love, my passion, and turns out to also be my thirteenth reason. When my muse runs out, thatâs it. My career is over. Old songs are boring, everything now is just so boring and stressful.Â
I slammed my hands on my keyboard for the nth time. âDammitâŠâ I leaned back into my chair, leaning so far back I almost fell to the floor. A heavy sigh left my lips, âWhy canât I come up with anything good anymore?â I looked at the floor, this had been going on for a month, absolutely no songs made, and ten times the stress levels. I knew I needed a break from everything for a while. I needed a change of rhythm.
I grabbed my wallet and jacket and left my genius lab. Itâs not a genius lab without a genius in it, I needed to get him back soon. I closed the door, and wouldnât be returning until this slump came to an end. Which hopefully would be soon.
âWhat do you mean youâre sick? You sound fine. You were fine yesterday.â
âIâm sick of this job,â I said, hanging up the phone. Instead of heading to Hybe, I called in sick. I might have well as been sick, a producer with no creativity is basically on the death bed. Likewise with an unmotivated musician. Sometimes you just need to get away from what youâre bored of for a while and return to it later. I grabbed my tote bag, put a few things in it, and went to a nearby coffee shop. The second floor is always better than the first, you get a beautiful view of the neighbourhood with all of the foliage.
When we got back from Vegas I never thought I would love to see so much green again. âThatâs something I could write aboutââ I got my pen out to jot in the small notebook of mine only to see the previous page and stop, âoh⊠I already did.â I always made writing songs look easy, but it never is. Inspiration appears so randomly, sometimes it comes through so clearly, but other times, like today, itâs coming at me like molasses. The ideas and I are almost like two south poles of a magnet. When I reach out for an idea, it runs away.Â
I let out a soft sigh, putting my notebook back into my tote bag. I finished my coffee while stalking my Instagram profile and deleting random DMs. These people are so unhinged online, itâs disgusting to think of the dirty things some people will message you with. They really drown out the important messages.
âAre you unproductive?â The ad blared from my phone. Instagram ads are so well hidden in the system, but that doesnât make them any less annoying. I was about to scroll before it continued, âmaybe itâs time for a change of rhythm. Hereâs ten things to help get your motivation back.â
So I listened. Fresh air? Check. Book? Check. Dramas? Check. A will to live? Working on it.Â
Itâs what I was doing anyway, just taking a break from everything. Plus Namjoon does this kind of stuff all the time. I brought my tote bag to the park and found a shade tree. I pulled out a self-help book by one of my favourite authors and got to reading. There was the slightest breeze, and the sun felt toasty on my legs that poked out from the shade of the tree.
I donât know when I had fallen asleep, but I was woken up by this girl, playing classical music on her phone. Or maybe it was the sun in my face that really woke me. At the moment, however, I could only focus on the loud music, the very thing I was avoiding. Why did she have to blast it like that? âHey, can you wear headphones or turn it down?â I felt groggy, and not like waking up⊠at all. She turned to look at me and I saw her hair, (s/t) skin and (e/c) eyes. âOh, sheâs a foreigner.â I suddenly went into English robot mode, âHello, your music, turn it down. Please?â Her eyes just went wide, like beautiful marbles. Why were they kind of cute? âWhat if she doesnât speak English?â My heart dropped at the thought.
âOh, Iâm sorry.â She replied in English. I sighed with relief and grabbed onto my chest. She bowed and walked away. In the distance, I could see her cover her face like she wanted to crawl into a hole from embarrassment. It almost made me feel guilty. But who plays their music so loudly without headphones on, in public? I thought that was clear internationally too, but maybe not. Who am I to judge?
I grabbed my phone and looked at the time, it was a few hours after when I normally ate lunch. Maybe I should just go home for the rest of the day. âHome⊠Maybe I should go back to Daegu for a bit.â I packed my book, water, and small picnic blanket into my bag and walked home. The sun felt nice on my skin. I thought about writing a song called âSunkissedâ on the walk home.
âThe warm lips of the sun
They hold you in when youâre trying to run...â
âNo, I hate it.â I ripped the paper out of my notebook and threw it away. I honestly wanted to cry. Either cry from stress or break everything I could. I opted to cry. And I did, I cried for at least an hour. Through making my lunch. Through eating that lunch while watching a drama on my big flat-screen TV, with Holly on my lap. And finally through my shower to rinse off the dirt from the park.Â
They say crying is for the weak, but I don't think so. Itâs not a weakness, itâs a sign of struggle, and battle scars. Itâs a coping mechanism. Screw those people who talk shit about people who cry too much.Â
I sigh after rinsing my hair out. I grab the towel that hangs on the bar attached to the glass of the shower. Suddenly I thought about what I would have to get for my parents. I shouldnât visit them empty-handed⊠although I could. âIâll make something out of wood for them. I already made cutting boards for the members, so⊠Maybe a coat hanger to put by the door.â I decided. The only thing you can give someone who has everything already or can get whatever they want is something handmade.
I wrapped the towel around my waist so I could dry my hair. I put a few products in it before blow-drying it. Then I put some face cream and sunscreen on my face and went back to my couch to continue the drama. Holly hopped up on my lap and nuzzled at my elbow until I lifted my arm over him. Itâs the cutest thing a dog can do. My heart was completely melted by his actions. âWhy are you so cute Holly-ah?â I started petting his curly fur and rubbing his ears. âDo you wanna visit Daegu again? Let's start packing tomorrow, huh?â
There was a hesitation before I raised my hand to knock on the door of the two-story building. My mom came to the door with equal hesitation, then she realised it was me. âYoongi-ah, what are you doing here all unannounced?â I walked in with my small suitcase.
âI thought Iâd visit for a little while. I didnât think I needed to get an invitation.â
âOf course not. I love seeing my little boy.â She picked up Holly, and took the leash from my hands. âIsnât that right my little boy?â She asked, referring to Holly. I made a bet with myself that within thirty minutes she would dress him in the silliest little outfit. I donât know how she gets him to let her, Iâm lucky if I can get a bandana on him. Mothers are full of magic. âSo whatâs the real reason why you came, Yoongi-ah? Is work getting stressful?â I could only nod in response. I didnât need to say anything.
âNo, heâs at work, probably like you should be right now.â
âYep. I was about to get dinner ready. We weren't expecting you, so go to the store and get more ingredients.â She shifted Holly to her left hand and grabbed my arm with her right. I was practically kidnapped into the kitchen, and given a list of things to get from the store. I briefly looked at the list, and I could see some things that were not just for dinner.
âDo we need cotton pads for dinner?â
âYouâre going to the store anyway, thereâs no need for multiple trips today.â She patted my back, and mouthed âthank youâ. I sighed and began my short journey to the store.
I realised that I should have driven to the store. It never hit me that I would carry more than eight bags home. I had to make two stops, but luckily the stores are relatively close to one another. But that didnât help my arms from carrying all these bags.
âNeed help there?â I turned around towards the voice. I didnât catch my grin before I saw his face.
âHyung. Here, take them.â
âAll of them?â He started laughing, then realised I was serious.
âYes,â I replied, holding out all of the bags for him to take. And of course he only took half. âYa! I said all of them!â I couldnât throw them all on him before he ran away. We reached home before I knew it. It may have gone faster because I chased him the whole way home.
I only caught up to him after we got home. He was standing by the door, about to take his shoes off, but not quite. He was busy laughing his ass off over god knows what. âMa, he runs like a grandpa! Hahaha!âÂ
âSo thatâs what it was. Heâs talking shit.â I opened the door and walked in calmly. While taking my shoes off I purposefully nudged my hyung with my shoulder. Sadly, he didnât fall over as I had hoped. âWe bumped into each other while walking home.â I brought the bags to the kitchen, washed all of the vegetables, and put them in the baskets with the matching produce. âMom, Iâm done,â I called out.
âUhuh,â she replied. She walked past me, and pet Holly, who had been standing right outside of the kitchen which was also the entrance hall of the house. She then fanned her hand towards me, telling me to get out of the kitchen. I jumped, ran to Holly and played with him a little.
âSo how are you doing Yoongi-ah?â My brother patted my shoulder, behind me.
âBored out of my mind. Howâs the restaurant going?â At some point, he had gotten a bag of chips.
âPretty much the same since the last time you visited. Pretty busy on the weekends. I still get some of your little fangirls, asking if you can marry them. Maybe if you actually got married theyâd stop asking.â He began to laugh and held his belly.
âShut it hyung, youâre older than me, what about your wife? Oh right, you donât have one.â I looked at him smugly with my arms crossed. âSeriously, this guyâŠâ
âOuch. That one hurt.â He wrapped both of his hands around his heart like he had been struck by a bullet. âAt least Iâm not being asked by millions upon millions of people around the world to marry them. Iâm perfectly content without that kind of stress. Iâm just gonna wait for my Miss Right.â
âYouâre like a billion years old, hyung- You know what? Nevermind.â I let out a long sigh. Sometimes hyung was great, he was the only one that had supported my love for music career through my middle and high school ages. But he could also be a brat as if he was the younger sibling.Â
âIâm going to go help Mom cook. Make yourself useless.â I groaned in response as I made my way from the entrance hall to my room, upstairs. I dove through my suitcase to get my tablet and continued the new drama I had started. I donât usually watch romances, but this one had good reviews from the watchers. There was also an adorable cat. I couldnât help but want my own when I watched how cute the kitten was in the show.
At some point in time, Holly had climbed the stairs and walked into my room whining. âWhat is it Holly-ah? Are you hungry?â Hollyâs ears perked up and his head tilted at the word âhungryâ. I got up with an iconic dad grunt and picked Holly up like a purse between my arm and body. When I got downstairs I pulled out some ground beef from the fridge that Mom didnât use in her cooking, and began to simmer it in the pan. I mixed it with some sweet potatoes and put some spices that vets recommend for dogs like turmeric and such. Holly jumped around sporadically while I put the contents into a bowl for him. âSit, hand. Other hand, okay!â Holly was always good with the little training tricks I taught him as a puppy.
âWell now that youâre downstairs, dinner is ready. Come eat Yoongi-ah,â Mom said. I hummed back in understanding and walked to the table in the living room that connected to both the entrance hall and the kitchen like a âTâ shape.Â