Official Pirates of the Caribbean Auction Scene Change Analysis (Incontrovertible)
The auction scene is to this day one of the most technologically and artistically impressive vignettes in any dark ride in history, and the changes are likely going to be tacked on and ugly for several years until they get around to fine-tuning it, if ever
Itâs likely the single most iconic show scene on any dark ride, and altering it after years of polluting the ride with Jack Sparrows and hackneyed attempts at a plot feels like an immense insult to injury
Lighthearted depictions of human trafficking arenât necessary
Removing it pisses off âpolitical correctness gone madâ cro-magnons
Reduce the price of parking. $20 is ridiculous. It doesnât affect me too much because Iâm buddy-buddy with a hotel manager nearby that lets me park in his lot for free when thereâs room, but I mean thereâs not always room. And isnât it ridiculous that Disneyland, a park that was basically an excuse to build a giant model train set and had an entire land that essentially existed to showcase readily actionable innovations in public transportation, is now entered by parking in a gigantic lot where you board a repurposed city bus and get dropped off in a traffic circle? And you have to pay $20 for that privilege while the PeopleMover tracks are left to rot, and the Monorails are so run down that they have more and more breakdowns every week? I know thereâs the whole thing where theyâre rerouting the track on the southern side of the eastern gateway with that whole remodeling project, so hereâs your fucking opportunity, Bobs. Bob Iger and Bob Chapek, you smiley fucks. You better get your shit together, you better get this fucking eastern gateway project right. Or you know whatâs going to fucking happen? You know what kind of fucking fate is going to befall you, you fucking clowns? Iâm going to keep coming to the resort without paying for a parking space. Next, Iâll start exploiting the parking validation with AMC. It costs what, $12 for a ticket? And $20 to park? Whatâs to stop me from dropping my cash to see the newest Dreamworks or Illumination shitheap and then just not seeing the movie, Bobs? And bring back the Big Hero 6 hot dog
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