stay sweet!

say i'm you, i'm in my weird little car, and i'm driving and i actually feel kind of cool for once, and then all of a sudden, oh, no--g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g--glitch!

[missmuttonfudge]

Teagan Muttonfudge || 23 || Heiress

Name: Teagan Muttonfudge Species: Human Sexuality: Bisexual Pronouns: She/Her  Favorite Song: dumb dumb by mazie Big Three: Leo sun, Leo moon, Virgo rising  Location: Amity Park

Headcanons:

Teagan is used to getting what she wants, when she wants it. Being the only child, she had her parents (and their bottomless wallets) wrapped around her finger. Honestly, after a while, it got pretty fucking boring. Teagan was someone who liked a challenge, and getting endless yeses from her parents wasn’t as thrilling as it once had been. She didn’t really hav to try for anything, including all of the shit she wanted to try and was simply handed to her with the best equipment and coaches that money could buy.

Though she’d never let it show, Teagan is a deeply insecure person. Having the kind of money her family does means that she should be the prettiest, the smartest, the best at anything she touches. There’s no excuse for imperfection, and her parents like to remind her of that. Her overcompensation for her insecurity can come off a little rash, but if people don’t like it, they can fuck off, as far as she’s concerned.

One of the reasons she decided to form her friend group was because she saw value in each of them and how they challenged her. Things had been so easy for so long that, honestly, she’s been waiting for someone to give her a run for her money. The first person to come close to that was Vanna, which was just irritating more than anything. To think that the only person who could face her was an outsider with a glitch was embarrassing, and she wouldn’t have that. It was one of the reasons why she had to squash them the first chance she got. 

If anything ever came out about her and Vanna hooking up, Teagan would deny it to her grave. She cannot believe she let herself have a moment that weak, and somehow, Richie had, too. Teagan can accept him cheating on her with people who deserved his attention, but Vanna was not one of those people. She knew she took it a little too far with the doxing, but she did what she had to do. In the end, she doesn’t regret it.

She’s been preparing for a coup from inside for years, and Teagan can feel it coming; she’s not stupid. It’s honestly kind of exciting to have something to prepare for, something that could actually shake her a little bit. She has no doubts that she’ll come out on top, no matter who it is that’s trying to shake her. Teagan’s not thrown easily.

Richie drives her absolutely insane, but it’s even more crazy that she still feels attached to him. She knows she could do a lot better than him, who’s made it clear that he thinks the same about her. It’s just really comfortable, and Teagan takes him at exact face value: she knows what to expect. Between them, there aren’t many secrets, even if they’re not entirely spoken. She wants to find someone who prioritizes her the way she knows she deserves, but any rift in the top couple of the group would jeopardize her position entirely.

Skating is fun and all, but Teagan knows she’s made for better than this. Her parents have an entire fortune that’s going to be her own one day, and it’s her job to build it bigger and better. It’s clear that Richie doesn’t deserve to be the guy beside her while she moves onward and upward, at the end of the day. All of this fighting feels kind of juvenile, and Teagan struggles with wanting to keep her spot at the top of her group and focusing on the big picture. What that looks like, she doesn’t know, but Teagan’s splitting her time plotting her present and her future.

[missmuttonfudge]

morethanplastic·:

To Barbie one of the things that made makeup so fun was that she got to see all the different ways everyone used it. She felt like she was watching an artist at work when she’d see elaborate looks online using her products. A canvas didn’t always have to be one thing, it could be on one’s face and their paint a tube of liquid lipstick. It was people like Teagan who had the eye to spot the right look and Barbie was quick to pick up on that. “Are you kidding? It’s like your signature pink. Everyone has a power color,” she said matter of factly. In fact, Barbie had her own shade of pink that she considered hers. Every time she wore it she felt a little more confident, like if she was going to do something she might as well do it in style. “Stop, that is perfect.” Barbie was glad to have someone that understood her so well helping her with marketing. “If that’s the case you know I have to give you our setting spray too,” she said reaching over into another box to grab a bottle for her. “This is a new formula, let me know how you like it. This one I wanted some sparkle so there’s the teeny tiniest little amount of glitter in there, just for a little extra shimmer.” 

“You’re so right, I even have the Pantone memorized. It’s a little more bright than your signature shade, but I’m kind of moving in that direction, you know? It’s more mature.” It was as though Barbie had thought of everything to make a perfect set of products for a night out, which Teagan admired. It was because she had experienced it all, unlike some of the other scientists she had working at the company, who Teagan could just tell had never even taken a sip of hard liquor before. “Incredible, literally. I mean, come on. No other cosmetic company has thought of putting glitter in their setting spray?” Teagan could appreciate innovation, taking a step out of brushing some shimmer herself on after getting ready. It always photographed better. “Are you thinking of doing an event for the launch? You totally should. You know I’ll never say no to a night out supporting my favorite brand.”

[missmuttonfudge]

vcnschweetz·:

“I think you’re memory is a little twisted. Denial is so understandable. It’s hard to accept you had sex with someone who knew how to make you orgasm more than once. I’m sure one day you’ll find someone else to do that once you cut off the ball and chain.” They almost laughed. It was always a little funny when Teagan’s eyes twitched. “With you, it probably is. You run a clique like it’s the 80′s at least.” They smirked, looking Teagan up and down. It was always so awful that someone so hot was probably in direct communication with The Underworld. Such a shame. “Anyways, the coup. Yeah, it’s a whole mess. It could actually work though if…Never mind. Forget I said anything.”

Teagan stared at them, seething. She knew that all of this was just to shake her, and she couldn’t give them the satisfaction of seeing her feathers ruffled--she wouldn’t. Everything was smooth sailing as far as Teagan was concerned when it came to Van. “I actually will forget all of this, but I didn’t need your permission.” There was a tiny part of her that couldn’t deny that she wanted to know what they had to say about this so-called coup, what other people were saying about it, too, but she didn’t need for Van to think that she needed them, not even a little. “Why don’t you get your nose out of my fucking business and into building your cute little following? You want to talk about obsession? You came here to do what, exactly, watch me shake?”

[missmuttonfudge]

morethanplastic·:

who: @missmuttonfudge· where: barbie cosmetics 

This wasn’t the first time she’d brought Teagan in to talk about things, knowing she was already promoting Barbie’s line of makeup and skincare before she ever even asked. It was a genuine find to meet someone that was not only amazing with a makeup brush but also had a knack for marketing as well. She’d already sent Teagan a care package with some of Barbie’s personal favorite products, now wanting to bring her into the office itself for a tour. Not to mention helping her pick out a few goodies to take home for herself. “This lipstick is like my absolute favorite formula, it is drink proof, kiss proof, and makes your lips so soft. Way too many liquid lipsticks just flake off and dry out your lips so fast I was not going to let that happen,” she said holding out one for the girl to try. “And I think this shade of pink was like meant for you.”

Teagan had been a fan of Barbie Cosmetics for as long as she could remember, since the brand had launched, so it was only natural that she would say yes to a collaboration with her. In her eyes, Barbie was like the ultimate girlboss, building a brand that strove to empower women and deliver quality cosmetics. Teagan wanted to build her own following, too, away from being one of the racers and into being just Teagan. It was always good to have a contingency plan. Taking the tube of lipstick into her hand, she swiped it on her wrist with a bright smile. “Oh, you know me so well. This is fabulous,” she gushed, dropping the tube into her bag. “I have the perfect top this would go with next time I go out. I can even do a before and after at the beginning and end of the night to show how long it stays.”

[missmuttonfudge]

stfurichie·:

Richie noticed the silence immediately, having an idea of what Teagan could be thinking about. This was the first time they were so close to talking about the elephant in the room, but would she actually say something? He was used to fights with the blonde, things turning from 0 to 100 in an instant, but they’d been having a lot of fun tonight, so he wondered if this would keep him safe for the time being. Did Teagan really wanna ruin their good time over this?

Richie shrugged his shoulders, smile still present. She was playing it safe, and he didn’t blame her. It kept things good between them. “Not that I can think of.” He kept the answer simple, pretending to be oblivious to keep her in a good mood. Luckily, the subject got changed, laughing as soon as she got defensive. “Hey, I didn’t mean it in a bad way. You work with what’s given to you, we gotta respect that.” He lead them to his place with his arm still around her side, other hand fumbling with the keys he pulled out of his pocket. “Alright, alright,” he said as he opened the door for them, letting her enter the first, “I know the drill. Drinks first, then we chill.”

Teagan couldn’t tell if she should be satisfied or pissed off that he had obviously lied to her face. At least he knew not to be the one to ruin their night, but part of her had hoped that he would just man up and admit the truth. It would be better not to have this fight in public, anyway, even if it was only in front of his doorman and whoever was coming out of the elevator. As for her tactical decisions, she knew that Richie wasn’t the smartest one of the bunch: shit was only going to get done if she did it herself.  

Entering his apartment, Teagan immediately headed for his couch, knowing that he would be the one to get their drinks out of the fridge without so much as a second word about it. She pulled out her phone, scrolling through while she waited for him to return with a brightly colored beverage in hand. “God, I fucking can’t. I thought the girls were supposed to be busy tonight, but they’re out,” Teagan groaned, unsure whether he could hear her or not, and she didn’t really care.

[missmuttonfudge]

continued from here for @classicpickles​

Teagan needed one of her friends to start dating someone so that they could ​double date and do all the cute shit she promised she never wanted, but deep down, had gotten jealous of others over. Maybe Angelica wasn’t the right person for it, but that didn’t mean she was going to stop herself from trying to peer pressure her into it. “Okay, like, yes, but it is kind of nice to have someone to pay for everything and take pictures of you,” Teagan pointed out. Richie wasn’t really good for either of those things, but he was good enough until she found someone else. “Or, you know, you could always go girlfriend. I think if Richie and I ever break up, I’m exclusively looking for a girl. No more of this immature boy bullshit. We’re getting way too old for that.”

[missmuttonfudge]

closed starter for @mrcolinhopper​

Teagan’s parents had some pretty powerful friends, one of whom included Hopper. She had known him for as long as she could remember, growing up with Uncle Hopper spoiling her about as much as her parents did. He had no kids, and she was probably the closest thing to it, so it only made sense. The concept of what he did for work had crossed her mind a few times, but Teagan learned from a young age that she was better off turning a blind eye to the shit she didn’t want to know, paste on a smile, and pretend like she was dumb. In reality, she was pretty sure he did some illegal shit, but as long as he didn’t get caught, who was she to judge?

“Question for you,” she started, entering his office without so much as a knock. He never usually minded, unless there was a meeting happening, which his assistant usually warned her about, anyway. “You don’t happen to know how to get your hands on wholesale liquor, do you? Not that I’m concerned about price, but I need it in bulk.” Teagan took a seat in the chair across from him, leaning her elbows on his desk. “Nothing serious, just trying to throw a party.”

[missmuttonfudge]

stfurichie​:

Teagan’s laugh only further boosted his confidence, as if he needed any more of it. Despite how much he’d cheated on the blonde and couldn’t seem to get his shit together fully, he did love her. They complimented each other so well, worked together better than anyone else he knew. Perhaps if he didn’t get drunk and be stupid so often when she wasn’t around, he’d be a better boyfriend to her. Clearly, drinking alongside Teagan had the opportunity to bring out his sweet side toward her.

Richie could tell they were teetering on a subject that they both avoided talking about, even with the alcohol in his system. He wasn’t stupid, he knew deep down. He was just curious to see her response, and it was clear that she wasn’t going to admit it out loud. He continued to butter her up anyway. “I’m never too far away, Teag. You know that,” he reassured her, looking down and giving his signature smirk. His grip around her waist tightened ever-so-slightly as she sighed dramatically. “Also, you don’t have to lie to me. I know you love to stir shit,” he couldn’t help but point out with a chuckle. “If you ever think I’m being too distant, just tell me. You’ve never been afraid to be honest before, so I wouldn’t expect anything less.”

Teagan remained silent for a moment, eyes focused on the sidewalk in front of her instead of her boyfriend. They’d never spoken about the elephant in the room that grew bigger with time, but was now really the time to? She didn’t want to ruin the one night they managed to spend together without bickering and ending in someone going home in tears. If she’d avoided talking about his infidelity for this long, surely it could wait another few hours until the morning, couldn’t it?

It was giving him the easy way out for now, and though Teagan was never one to be known for being soft, she considered it a selfish decision more than one to benefit Richie. She didn’t want to ruin the night for herself, either. “Me? No, I’m fine,” she insisted, finally looking up into his blue eyes and curled smirk. “Totally fine, unless there’s something you need to be honest about,” Teagan added, not letting him entirely off the hook. “I don’t stir shit, Richard, not on purpose. The shit comes to me muddled, and I just clear it up for everyone, that’s all,” Teagan stated simply, eyes squinted from the fluorescent lighting of his building’s lobby as they entered the automatic doors inside. 

[allthelettersicanwrite]

Leighton Murray in Season 2 of The Sex Lives of College Girls

[Am I happy?] That is a big question. But in terms of who I am and my sexuality, yes.

[missmuttonfudge]

stfurichie·:

Even if Teagan wouldn’t admit her love for Richie, he knew it was there. He could see it in her gaze and her smile, and he knew for a fact she wouldn’t keep him so close if she didn’t feel that way about him. From the way she had treated Vanna, he knew she would kick him to the curb in an instant if she felt any different. He smirked though, hearing it aloud making it all the more better. “Oh, I can show you all kinds of fun, Muttonfudge, don’t underestimate me,” he teased in return. Even if he thought Teagan was hot when she often took charge, it was still fun to take that place at times. The liquid confidence definitely helped with that. “Deal,” he grinned against her lips, nodding his head. “Yeah, let me close out the tab.”

After giving a generous tip to the bartender and attempting to order an Uber, the couple decided to walk back to his place instead. It wasn’t too far anyway, and they wouldn’t have to deal with the awkwardness of a random driver playing strange music as they drove them back. He had an arm wrapped around her side as they walked together, a cold breeze present but the alcohol in their systems keeping them warm. “You know, I feel like we haven’t done this in awhile — hung out just you and me. What’s up with that?”

Teagan couldn’t help but laugh a bit at his overconfidence, finding it kind of cute. Richie was the only person she could think of that was so unapologetically himself around her that she didn’t have to wonder what kind of a person he was. She wished that he would challenge her a little bit more, of course, but she would take what she could get. Though she knew it was better than Richie, he was somehow the only one who could tolerate her crazy, too.

While she was used to getting a car home, Teagan was actually happy to walk this time. It was extra time to spend with Richie, and the cold wasn’t too awful tonight. With his arm around her side, she slid her own around his waist, leaning into his chest. The true reason why they hadn’t been hanging out as a couple involved what he did while she wasn’t around, but Teagan was careful in saying that aloud. “I don’t know, you tell me, babe. I don’t want to stir shit, but you have felt a little distant, you know. I just hope you’re never too far away,” she added wistfully, heaving a bit of a dramatic sigh.

[missmuttonfudge]

vcnschweetz·:

Van couldn’t help but be a little in awe of the crazed way Teagan carried herself. Call them a masochist, but seeing them be slightly unhinged was hot as hell. They would never ever admit that to her, but hey, thoughts were thoughts. “I know you have no idea. I’d give you a complete refresher and all, but I don’t have the time to explain that long ass moment we had.” Van truly didn’t understand what the point to all of this was, but their fight or flight was up high and of course the setting was fight. They were tired of running from these people. Most of them were hardly better than they were and now that they understood that, nothing fazed them badly anymore. They have heard it all, seen it all, and know what to expect from the Sugar Rush Crew to the point where it was just a little boring. “I never said it was a good following. And I also don’t really care if I’m popular on the internet,” they said with a casual shrug. “That seems to be a huge waste of your time. Don’t ya have a coup to worry about? Or like, literally anything else?”

“There was no moment. It was hardly a millisecond. The sooner you get that into your head, the better.” She wasn’t sure how else to get it into their head that nothing had happened between them. It was the same reason why Teagan let Richie go around sleeping with whoever he pleased: the physical shit meant nothing to her. Maybe it stung a bit more when it was her boyfriend doing it, but that was all it was: a sting. What pained her more was how unbothered they seemed by her attempts at attack. “Again, I have no idea what you’re talking about. A coup? What the fuck is this, the French Revolution?” Teagan blinked, confused. Of course she knew what they meant, but how the hell did they know about it? 

[missmuttonfudge]

vcnschweetz·:

Van couldn’t help but snort at the effort. Teagan was truly something else. She claims she was so unbothered by so much but then she did the most to try to bring Van down. The Van before the doxing would have totally took those comments to heart, it would have hurt like hell actually, but the Van they were now was a Van with nothing left to lose. What more could Teagan actually do to them? Unless she was the very witch that cursed them, she held no power over them. None of her friends did either. The only thing that really sucked was that Van got a glimpse of the Teagan that didn’t put on a show and just let herself actually enjoy the company she kept. That was the only thing that still bothered them sometimes. “Oh shit, I disappeared? Am I dead? Haunting you? Ooo so scary!” They almost laughed at themselves, as cheesy as they were behaving. “I mean, it was pretty nice when you did that thing with your tong-oh, you meant the other thing. Hmmm…vaguely remembering the nice part. I’m sure we will get there soon….let me think….ahh yes, putting a bunch of eyes on an apparent nobody. I actually have a following now. So yeah, thanks for that a lot, actually.”

Teagan didn’t like to think about hooking up with Van. It was one of the biggest mistakes she’d ever made, one of the only times she had let herself slip and falter from the persona she had fought hard to build for herself. Van knew it, too, and they were trying to use it against her now, but Teagan wouldn’t be thrown. It was the only defense they had; she could’ve seen this one coming from a mile away. “I have no idea what you’re talking about,” she responded, calm. Harping on it any more would give them more ammunition than they. needed to have. “You think you have a following? That’s adorable. You know I can throw just as many people your way who can destroy you, right?” Getting haters thrown at Van would be easy, but Teagan didn’t like things that were that simple. Her wheels were turning, and the more they fought back, the harder she was thinking about how she could knock them down yet again.

[missmuttonfudge]

stfurichie·:

Richie knew that there was so much more he could do for Teagan, but what would be the fun in that? It was the push and pull that kept things interesting between them. Tonight, he was feeling the pull — maybe it was the alcohol, or maybe he just genuinely missed her touch. “Come onnn, you know you love me,” he said with a playful pout, watching as she brought her straw to her lips. “Why don’t we go back to my place after this. I’ll get us an Uber, we can mess around ..” He trailed off, brushing a blonde strand of her hair behind her ear. He was buttering her up, just how he knew she liked it. It was really only fun to give her just what she wanted when it benefitted himself. “I know neither of us wanna go home alone tonight. Plus, this place kinda blows. I’ve got better booze in my own fridge.”

Deep down, Teagan hated to admit that she did have love in her heart for her idiot boyfriend. He didn’t treat her as well as he used to, and both of them knew it. She wasn’t sure if she was supposed to demand more or hope that one day he would figure it out. “Unfortunately, that’s true,” she admitted, giving a reluctant crack of a smile. While the thought of going home with him sounded kind of boring, it was better than being alone; he was right about that. “And let you have your way? What’s the fun in that?” Teagan teased, only slightly serious. She sipped the rest of her drink quickly, placing the empty glass down on the bar with a sigh. “I guess you can have this one, but you’re making the drinks,” she insisted, though it was a tiny price to pay for giving Richie what he wanted. Regardless, she slid her hand into his and placed a peck on his lips. “You ready to go?”

[missmuttonfudge]

stfurichie·:

continued from here

“Says me,” Richie answered as if it were obvious. “You don’t believe me?” He put a hand on his chest as if he should be offended. In reality, she wasn’t wrong for not believing him — he didn’t do very much to show his affection toward her, besides the rare moments of sweetness that randomly seemed to surface. The two blondes had a complicated relationship, but they worked with what they had. They both knew each other like no one else, and appreciated the rockier parts of each other that others would consider giant red flags. The toxic part of Richie found Teagan’s red flags to be the sexier parts of her. “I know, I’m hilarious,” he smirked, a mischievous twinkle in his eye. He proceeded to get the bartenders attention without hesitation, willing to do just about anything for Teagan. Ordering a Dirty Shirley for her should have wounded his manhood a little bit, but he was pretty used to it. His own drink still rested in his grasp, sliding hers toward her as soon as the bartender brought it over. “See, what’d I tell you, Teag? I do it all for you.” @missmuttonfudge·

Teagan rolled her eyes as he turned toward the bar, unimpressed. She wasn’t sure what he was expecting her to say to that when she had to beg him to refill her drink; any other normal boyfriend would’ve taken notice, she thought. It was the price of complacency, she figured. “You think buying your girlfriend a drink with your endless money pit is doing it all? My standards must be low.” She was only half teasing, but accepted the drink, anyway, bringing the red liquid to her lips. Teagan only liked the sweeter things in life, especially when it came to drinks. That applied to romance, too, but the well of it had seemed to run dry when it came to her own boyfriend. “Color me unimpressed. You’re going to have to do a lot better than that,” she challenged with a raised brow, sipping from her straw.

[missmuttonfudge]

continued from here for @vcnschweetz​

Teagan let out an incredulous laugh at their weak attempt at retaliation. As far as she was concerned, they were just asking for her to make them remember who she was, and not in the way that involved anything to do with the night they’d spent together. No, Teagan always had something up her sleeve prepared about the people who had placed her at the top of their shit lists, and Vanna was one of them. Though she would never let anyone see, she had been keeping a close watch on them since the two had effectively cut each other out of their lives. “You think that’s hitting me with your best shot? Cute,” she retorted, letting out an amused sigh. If anything, she was flattered to be associated with the other blonde, who so happened to be her best friend. “You want me to help you remember? Last time, that was me being nice. I can send you a little reminder of how nice I can be,” Teagan offered, calm. They wouldn’t throw her, at least, not on the surface. “You know, I actually missed you, little glitch. Life’s no fun without watching you disappear into oblivion.”

[missmuttonfudge]

"I still do it for you, babe." - Richie

Teagan looked at him incredulously, letting out a small laugh. “Says who?” she asked, and meant it. After a while of dating him, she’d grown comfortable, almost wondering what she’d seen in him in the first place. The only reason why she still felt any sense of attachment came from seeing that other people had some sort of interest in him. Teagan liked to have things that other people wanted, which unfortunately included her stale boyfriend. In a weird way, though, she was kind of convinced he was her soulmate. “You’re funny. You know what you could do for me, though? Get me another drink. I don’t want to get his attention again,” she whined, gesturing her head toward the bartender. Though she could with just a snap of her fingers, it was much more satisfying to see Richie try and shove his masculinity to the side and beg someone for attention. 

@stfurichie

[mira4-deactivated20150320]

When's your birthday?

Why so you can look up my natal chart? So you can figure out my weaknesses? So you can destroy me?