one sip of your blood was enough to make him utterly obsessed.
wc: 2.1k, cw: subspace, kidnapping, biting
( alternate universe, vampire subspace, explorer reader )
you weren’t entirely sure how you stumbled into such a situation.
the last thing you remembered were the metal gates surrounding a manor, the surfaces growing rusty and emitting an unpleasant smell. word had spread amongst your guild of inphernals that this mansion harbored various rare treasures that wouldn’t exist in any other place. after much inquiry, you’d learnt that its previous owner was a renowned inventor who suffered a grave accident, leading to his death.
the tale sounded simple enough. an abandoned manor with several valuables inside, perhaps heavily guarded with traps or security systems. upon entering, you swore it appeared perfectly normal, like every other excursion you’d been a part of. dark rooms clouded with dust and cobwebs, metal scraps and shards of glass vials littered across the floor, traces of papers with blueprints scribbled all over… judging from the peaceful surroundings, you were sure this would be another successful quest to add into your collection.
perhaps that assumption was your most fatal mistake. your journey progressed with so much ease that you’d failed to notice the pink gas that slowly slid into each of the rooms.
was it a defense mechanism installed within the manor itself? a rather complicated one, considering your time period. several of your fellow scientists haven’t even considered the use of poisonous gases as a weapon. how was this sort of technology even installed in such a pla—
“ah ah ah,” a melodic voice floated into the air, waking you from your slumber. the first sensation you felt was something binding your entire body, restricting even the smallest movements. through your blurred vision, you realized that you were tied up against a chair within a dim room. the ground beneath you felt like torn up paper, and upon looking up, you realized you were in a laboratory. surrounding you were several broken metal models resembling… guards? or robots?
a laboratory with robots? in such an era? surely that should be impossible. the tools and containers scattered around this place were far too advanced for the average invento—
“still in your slumber?”
a set of sharp claws grazed over the side of your neck. they felt cold and fleeting, but dangerous enough to cause some serious damage.
“i can tell that you’re awake,” the fingers dragged up to your cheek, their touch just shy of gripping your skin, “perhaps you’re thinking of what led you into such an unfortunate position?”
a shiver ran down your spine, and judging from their giggle, they noticed it well.
“oh, don’t tell me you’re already regretting your decisions!” their voice chirped right beside your ear, though the gesture was anything but friendly. “i’m sure it’s too late for a rat like you to be considering anything right now. do you mortals not know it’s so incredibly rude to trespass a place like this?”
mortals?
before you could even reply, the claws gripped at the back of your chair, immediately spinning you around.
standing before you was no doubt a figure resembling an inphernal, their skin unnaturally pale and their lone eye scowling with hostility. they were draped in a large black cloak and a black gas mask, covering their skin almost completely. their most prominent features had to be the set of bright pink horns, and what seemed to be a floating crystal right in between.
upon closer inspection, you swore that their appearance looked eerily familiar…
“must you stare at me so intensely?” the figure sneered, “such flattery would’ve brought me to tears! if only i could receive a good explanation as to why you were snooping around so giddily…”
“i- i…” you choked. you should’ve seen the signs the moment you entered your first room. it was impossible for a mission to be so easy. “i apologize! i didn’t mean to—”
“you didn’t mean to…” they purred. right away, they held up your leather bag, the objects inside clinking against each other. “surely, you didn’t mean to take all of my precious items with such a delighted smile on your face?”
ah. there was no denying that part.
although, their choice of wording was rather peculiar. you were sure this place was completely abandoned, so why did they speak of having such ownership?
the more you stared at their features, the more you slowly started to connect the dots. this manor did have an owner, the genius inventor and the unsavory rumors surrounding the circumstances of his death several decades ago. everyone had assumed that he was dead, even if his actual body was never found—you’d read through the papers detailing such news on the board with several other guild members.
bright pink horns. laboratories. the unfinished blueprints…
you’d been such a fool from the very beginning.
“aha—! that look in your eyes is priceless!” they laughed, “with a face this memorable, i would’ve been incredibly offended if you were still clueless about my identity.”
“...subspace,” the inventor himself, in the flesh. but how? how has his body remained functional throughout the years? a normal deceased inphernal would’ve been rotting or disintegrating within weeks, and their features would’ve become unrecognizable by then. “i… i don’t understand, how are you still—”
“of course you don’t! such concepts would be far too complicated for a mind like yours.”
wow. rude.
“hm, if i had to explain so graciously…” subspace tapped at his chin, “let’s just say right before that wretched scientist tried to kill me, i… experimented with a little something as a safety precaution. and would you believe it? the next thing i knew, i was still alive! breathing! in this very lab! i tried all sorts of tests, but for some reason, i’d become immune to death itself!”
“i’m… not following.”
“ugh, must i explain it so thoroughly?” he huffed, crossing his arms, “i’m still alive, that’s a fact. but, i’ve been afflicted with two conditions specifically. even if i may look oh so pristine right now…”
he raised up his right arm, revealing what appears to be dark pink marks resembling rotting skin. if you looked closely, the left side of his face also bore similar stripes all over.
“it’s all that man’s fault! the utter audacity—to inflict such hideous scars on me and still have the nerve to run, calling it a bloody accident!” subspace continued on, “my life has been terribly inconvenient. parts of my body are actively rotting, and i could do little to sustain myself! begs the question how i’m still faring until now, don’t you think?”
well… now you did not really want to know.
“which brings me to my next point…” subspace’s tone dropped low as he leaned forward, his hand moving over to the clasps of his gas mask. with a loud click, the material fell away to reveal the expanse of his jaw, the skin peeling off to expose specks of flesh and bone underneath. “i’ve discovered that my condition renders ordinary food as completely useless for my body. i kept testing, and testing—oh, how could i possibly survive? my own internal systems are rejecting basic nutrition!”
his claws reached out, poking at the side of your neck. with his face up close, you could smell the potent scent of chemicals and toxin, which slowly emitted from the spaces between his sharp teeth.
“out of pure coincidence, i found the solution,” he grinned devilishly, “my source of nutrition came from consuming… blood.”
immediately, the claws dug deep into your neck, causing your body to jolt. from the scale of the pain, you knew his intentions were to draw blood.
pulling back, subspace inspected the tips of his fingers, which glistened with a bright shade of red. with a pleased hum, he brought them up to his mouth, as if to test the quality of your blood. the scientist fell speechless for a moment, his mind too busy conjuring up the right words to describe what he’d just consumed.
“how curious,” he pondered, licking away any remaining traces of your blood, “from my notes, inphernal blood tends to be similar in consistency. it’s hard for me to distinguish each individual taste now, but…”
he leaned in again.
“don’t look so shaken, little rat,” his teeth stretched into a threatening smirk, “after scurrying through my things so shamelessly, it’s only fair you repay me somehow, no? thievery is such a terrible crime, after all.”
your eyes widened at his words—instantly, you struggled against the ropes securing you, but to no avail.
subspace gazed over your form with much amusement, taking great pleasure in seeing your fruitless efforts to run. ultimately, his hands reached out to still your shoulders, the strength becoming too much for you to bear.
“brace yourself, mortal,” he cooed, “struggling will only make it hurt now.”
the sensation of pain shot right through your body.
subspace’s jaw shifted into the junction of your neck, his canines digging deep and breaking into your skin. the smell of iron drifted up to your nostrils, and right away, your body tensed up with every little movement his fangs made against your wound. it stung badly—more than you’d like to admit—and you tried your best to stifle your discomfort through gritted teeth.
the canines remained in place as he drank down gulp after gulp of your blood, and after what felt like forever, you felt something wet dragging over the punctures—his tongue, presumably, or what remained of it.
deciding that he’d had enough, the scientist finally pulled back. though, he still stayed a little too close for comfort. if you had to choose the right words to describe the expression on his face, subspace looked like he’d just found a specimen that he couldn’t wait to experiment more on.
“ah…” his mouth stretched up into a wide, beaming smile, “i’ve underestimated you, mortal.”
“wh– what?”
“your blood…” his claws grazed over your jaw, the touch dangerously affectionate, “ever since that accident, i’ve lost my sense of taste completely. every little drop has always been the same for me, but your blood…”
his face inched closer to yours.
“how should i explain it?” subspace’s mouth dipped down, brushing lightly over your wounds in what could be described as an imitation of a kiss. “it’s… invigorating. absolutely delightful. heavenly, even.”
for some reason, he appeared way more terrifying than his hostile self moments ago.
“my precious machines have been gathering me nourishment for several decades, but the mortals they picked out were awfully boring,” he sighed dramatically, “blood has always been so dull for me, so why is it that yours is so… fulfilling?”
finally, the scientist pulled back, his movements now more energetic. he circled your chair gleefully, his fingers curiously grazing your bound frame every now and then. it made the hairs on your neck stand up—you’ve never wanted to bolt out of a building so fast.
“you are a wonderful anomaly, sweetheart,” his head dropped to whisper right beside your ear, his voice sickeningly sweet, “i must keep you for my studies. surely, you don’t mind staying for a little while? after all, we must make your dreadful trip to my manor worth it.”
“ab– absolutely not!” your head shook rapidly, “let me go! i’m not interested—”
“do you truly think you have the right to decline, mortal? how adorable!” he mocked, placing a hand right over his chest, “i told you, remember? a little thief like you should be begging for forgiveness, and i know exactly what you could do to repay me.”
subspace walked over to his original position, bending down to retrieve the discarded gas mask. after some pacing and mumbling to himself, he turned over to glance at you, his lone eye appearing a little too enthusiastic.
“fret not, i’ll gather the best arrangements for you!” he clasped his hands together, “this place may be a little rundown in some areas, but i’m certain you’ll make yourself at home in no time! i’ll make sure to treat you as my dearest test subject, doesn’t that just sound splendid?”
your eyes glanced over to his hands, which seemed to be fumbling with something. a closer look indicated that he was holding a leg cuff and a syringe containing some mysterious substance—he was planning on keeping you locked up in here. long term.
“you… you are mad.” you trembled.
“mad? perhaps, but it’s been sooo lonely after all… won’t you save me the trouble of having to constantly find sustenance?” he walked over, ruffling your head. he made it clear that despite your discomfort, you had no say in the matter. “don’t worry, my creations will keep you perfectly safe and sound! you’d only harm yourself even more if you ran off now, wouldn’t you?”
silently, you could only pray that your guild cared enough to search for you.
so um
i'm sorry this one took a weird messed up turn i just find it very hard to depict subspace in a cutesy kawaii fluffy romantic scenario. esp with the vampire thing too...😵 some aspects of his rot may be written inaccurately and i'm so so so sorry for that it's really for the sake of the vampire scenario :(
this rq was what made me realize that in truth i'm actually really fucking scared of writing LMAOOOOO i love so many of the characters but i still don't understand all of them fully and that makes me a little on edge. thank you for continuously supporting my work though, mwah mwah !! x3
one sip of your blood was enough to make him utterly obsessed.
wc: 2.1k, cw: subspace, kidnapping, biting
( alternate universe, vampire subspace, explorer reader )
you weren’t entirely sure how you stumbled into such a situation.
the last thing you remembered were the metal gates surrounding a manor, the surfaces growing rusty and emitting an unpleasant smell. word had spread amongst your guild of inphernals that this mansion harbored various rare treasures that wouldn’t exist in any other place. after much inquiry, you’d learnt that its previous owner was a renowned inventor who suffered a grave accident, leading to his death.
the tale sounded simple enough. an abandoned manor with several valuables inside, perhaps heavily guarded with traps or security systems. upon entering, you swore it appeared perfectly normal, like every other excursion you’d been a part of. dark rooms clouded with dust and cobwebs, metal scraps and shards of glass vials littered across the floor, traces of papers with blueprints scribbled all over… judging from the peaceful surroundings, you were sure this would be another successful quest to add into your collection.
perhaps that assumption was your most fatal mistake. your journey progressed with so much ease that you’d failed to notice the pink gas that slowly slid into each of the rooms.
was it a defense mechanism installed within the manor itself? a rather complicated one, considering your time period. several of your fellow scientists haven’t even considered the use of poisonous gases as a weapon. how was this sort of technology even installed in such a pla—
“ah ah ah,” a melodic voice floated into the air, waking you from your slumber. the first sensation you felt was something binding your entire body, restricting even the smallest movements. through your blurred vision, you realized that you were tied up against a chair within a dim room. the ground beneath you felt like torn up paper, and upon looking up, you realized you were in a laboratory. surrounding you were several broken metal models resembling… guards? or robots?
a laboratory with robots? in such an era? surely that should be impossible. the tools and containers scattered around this place were far too advanced for the average invento—
“still in your slumber?”
a set of sharp claws grazed over the side of your neck. they felt cold and fleeting, but dangerous enough to cause some serious damage.
“i can tell that you’re awake,” the fingers dragged up to your cheek, their touch just shy of gripping your skin, “perhaps you’re thinking of what led you into such an unfortunate position?”
a shiver ran down your spine, and judging from their giggle, they noticed it well.
“oh, don’t tell me you’re already regretting your decisions!” their voice chirped right beside your ear, though the gesture was anything but friendly. “i’m sure it’s too late for a rat like you to be considering anything right now. do you mortals not know it’s so incredibly rude to trespass a place like this?”
mortals?
before you could even reply, the claws gripped at the back of your chair, immediately spinning you around.
standing before you was no doubt a figure resembling an inphernal, their skin unnaturally pale and their lone eye scowling with hostility. they were draped in a large black cloak and a black gas mask, covering their skin almost completely. their most prominent features had to be the set of bright pink horns, and what seemed to be a floating crystal right in between.
upon closer inspection, you swore that their appearance looked eerily familiar…
“must you stare at me so intensely?” the figure sneered, “such flattery would’ve brought me to tears! if only i could receive a good explanation as to why you were snooping around so giddily…”
“i- i…” you choked. you should’ve seen the signs the moment you entered your first room. it was impossible for a mission to be so easy. “i apologize! i didn’t mean to—”
“you didn’t mean to…” they purred. right away, they held up your leather bag, the objects inside clinking against each other. “surely, you didn’t mean to take all of my precious items with such a delighted smile on your face?”
ah. there was no denying that part.
although, their choice of wording was rather peculiar. you were sure this place was completely abandoned, so why did they speak of having such ownership?
the more you stared at their features, the more you slowly started to connect the dots. this manor did have an owner, the genius inventor and the unsavory rumors surrounding the circumstances of his death several decades ago. everyone had assumed that he was dead, even if his actual body was never found—you’d read through the papers detailing such news on the board with several other guild members.
bright pink horns. laboratories. the unfinished blueprints…
you’d been such a fool from the very beginning.
“aha—! that look in your eyes is priceless!” they laughed, “with a face this memorable, i would’ve been incredibly offended if you were still clueless about my identity.”
“...subspace,” the inventor himself, in the flesh. but how? how has his body remained functional throughout the years? a normal deceased inphernal would’ve been rotting or disintegrating within weeks, and their features would’ve become unrecognizable by then. “i… i don’t understand, how are you still—”
“of course you don’t! such concepts would be far too complicated for a mind like yours.”
wow. rude.
“hm, if i had to explain so graciously…” subspace tapped at his chin, “let’s just say right before that wretched scientist tried to kill me, i… experimented with a little something as a safety precaution. and would you believe it? the next thing i knew, i was still alive! breathing! in this very lab! i tried all sorts of tests, but for some reason, i’d become immune to death itself!”
“i’m… not following.”
“ugh, must i explain it so thoroughly?” he huffed, crossing his arms, “i’m still alive, that’s a fact. but, i’ve been afflicted with two conditions specifically. even if i may look oh so pristine right now…”
he raised up his right arm, revealing what appears to be dark pink marks resembling rotting skin. if you looked closely, the left side of his face also bore similar stripes all over.
“it’s all that man’s fault! the utter audacity—to inflict such hideous scars on me and still have the nerve to run, calling it a bloody accident!” subspace continued on, “my life has been terribly inconvenient. parts of my body are actively rotting, and i could do little to sustain myself! begs the question how i’m still faring until now, don’t you think?”
well… now you did not really want to know.
“which brings me to my next point…” subspace’s tone dropped low as he leaned forward, his hand moving over to the clasps of his gas mask. with a loud click, the material fell away to reveal the expanse of his jaw, the skin peeling off to expose specks of flesh and bone underneath. “i’ve discovered that my condition renders ordinary food as completely useless for my body. i kept testing, and testing—oh, how could i possibly survive? my own internal systems are rejecting basic nutrition!”
his claws reached out, poking at the side of your neck. with his face up close, you could smell the potent scent of chemicals and toxin, which slowly emitted from the spaces between his sharp teeth.
“out of pure coincidence, i found the solution,” he grinned devilishly, “my source of nutrition came from consuming… blood.”
immediately, the claws dug deep into your neck, causing your body to jolt. from the scale of the pain, you knew his intentions were to draw blood.
pulling back, subspace inspected the tips of his fingers, which glistened with a bright shade of red. with a pleased hum, he brought them up to his mouth, as if to test the quality of your blood. the scientist fell speechless for a moment, his mind too busy conjuring up the right words to describe what he’d just consumed.
“how curious,” he pondered, licking away any remaining traces of your blood, “from my notes, inphernal blood tends to be similar in consistency. it’s hard for me to distinguish each individual taste now, but…”
he leaned in again.
“don’t look so shaken, little rat,” his teeth stretched into a threatening smirk, “after scurrying through my things so shamelessly, it’s only fair you repay me somehow, no? thievery is such a terrible crime, after all.”
your eyes widened at his words—instantly, you struggled against the ropes securing you, but to no avail.
subspace gazed over your form with much amusement, taking great pleasure in seeing your fruitless efforts to run. ultimately, his hands reached out to still your shoulders, the strength becoming too much for you to bear.
“brace yourself, mortal,” he cooed, “struggling will only make it hurt now.”
the sensation of pain shot right through your body.
subspace’s jaw shifted into the junction of your neck, his canines digging deep and breaking into your skin. the smell of iron drifted up to your nostrils, and right away, your body tensed up with every little movement his fangs made against your wound. it stung badly—more than you’d like to admit—and you tried your best to stifle your discomfort through gritted teeth.
the canines remained in place as he drank down gulp after gulp of your blood, and after what felt like forever, you felt something wet dragging over the punctures—his tongue, presumably, or what remained of it.
deciding that he’d had enough, the scientist finally pulled back. though, he still stayed a little too close for comfort. if you had to choose the right words to describe the expression on his face, subspace looked like he’d just found a specimen that he couldn’t wait to experiment more on.
“ah…” his mouth stretched up into a wide, beaming smile, “i’ve underestimated you, mortal.”
“wh– what?”
“your blood…” his claws grazed over your jaw, the touch dangerously affectionate, “ever since that accident, i’ve lost my sense of taste completely. every little drop has always been the same for me, but your blood…”
his face inched closer to yours.
“how should i explain it?” subspace’s mouth dipped down, brushing lightly over your wounds in what could be described as an imitation of a kiss. “it’s… invigorating. absolutely delightful. heavenly, even.”
for some reason, he appeared way more terrifying than his hostile self moments ago.
“my precious machines have been gathering me nourishment for several decades, but the mortals they picked out were awfully boring,” he sighed dramatically, “blood has always been so dull for me, so why is it that yours is so… fulfilling?”
finally, the scientist pulled back, his movements now more energetic. he circled your chair gleefully, his fingers curiously grazing your bound frame every now and then. it made the hairs on your neck stand up—you’ve never wanted to bolt out of a building so fast.
“you are a wonderful anomaly, sweetheart,” his head dropped to whisper right beside your ear, his voice sickeningly sweet, “i must keep you for my studies. surely, you don’t mind staying for a little while? after all, we must make your dreadful trip to my manor worth it.”
“ab– absolutely not!” your head shook rapidly, “let me go! i’m not interested—”
“do you truly think you have the right to decline, mortal? how adorable!” he mocked, placing a hand right over his chest, “i told you, remember? a little thief like you should be begging for forgiveness, and i know exactly what you could do to repay me.”
subspace walked over to his original position, bending down to retrieve the discarded gas mask. after some pacing and mumbling to himself, he turned over to glance at you, his lone eye appearing a little too enthusiastic.
“fret not, i’ll gather the best arrangements for you!” he clasped his hands together, “this place may be a little rundown in some areas, but i’m certain you’ll make yourself at home in no time! i’ll make sure to treat you as my dearest test subject, doesn’t that just sound splendid?”
your eyes glanced over to his hands, which seemed to be fumbling with something. a closer look indicated that he was holding a leg cuff and a syringe containing some mysterious substance—he was planning on keeping you locked up in here. long term.
“you… you are mad.” you trembled.
“mad? perhaps, but it’s been sooo lonely after all… won’t you save me the trouble of having to constantly find sustenance?” he walked over, ruffling your head. he made it clear that despite your discomfort, you had no say in the matter. “don’t worry, my creations will keep you perfectly safe and sound! you’d only harm yourself even more if you ran off now, wouldn’t you?”
silently, you could only pray that your guild cared enough to search for you.
so um
i'm sorry this one took a weird messed up turn i just find it very hard to depict subspace in a cutesy kawaii fluffy romantic scenario. esp with the vampire thing too...😵 some aspects of his rot may be written inaccurately and i'm so so so sorry for that it's really for the sake of the vampire scenario :(
this rq was what made me realize that in truth i'm actually really fucking scared of writing LMAOOOOO i love so many of the characters but i still don't understand all of them fully and that makes me a little on edge. thank you for continuously supporting my work though, mwah mwah !! x3
genre: established relationship; husband and wife stuck in space (but they don't know that yet;)
warnings: anxiety, feeling of pensiveness, feelings that imply thoughts of suicide
word count: 3.8k
author's note: hey soooo, i didn't actually expect the first one to blow up like that WHAT!? thank you so much for the support and positive comments! i'm so excited for what's to come so, hope u are too! my fav work so far but not proofread cuz i'm lowkey tired lol. the em dashes are fucking hideous HAHA cuz my chromebook didnt have that or maybe i js didnt know but wtv. will be editing everything as well as the summaries for each chapter later after i get some rest. for the mean time, have some domestic ryland grace food.
summary: you wake up in space without any knowledge of how you got there with two corpses for roomates. and oh, if it's any consolation, there's also another person—just that he's as disoriented and clueless as you are.
°⋆. ࿔*:･ part two of about time | previous chapter
you sink into the soft mattress as you lay down. the delicate, subtle smell of fabric conditioner washing over you as you cover yourself up in the freshly washed sheets.
you close your eyes, feeling the burden of perplexity tire you down. the warm glow of the night lamp hovering atop your eyelids and the muffled sound of the shower running lulling you to sleep.
"sun's really dying, huh." ryland calls out from a distance, the door closing behind him. you flinch.
you tried not to think of it too much when he had sent that email to you from a list he thought he'd already unsubscribed from. especially when he detailed that the sun's output will drop a full percent over the next nine years, and will inflate to five percent in twenty years resulting in an instant ice age.
watching the broadcast didn't help. sitting from the couch, eating piping-hot spaghetti with ryland wasn't what you envisioned you'd be doing when the news would drop, but it was what you chose to do instead of having co-workers and friends around to bombard you with questions.
the inner nerd in you was honestly thrilled about the project despite the situation being so terrifying.
a science fiction novel being brought to life.
unknown dots infecting celestial bodies in space, thriving in venus' atmosphere, contaminating and surviving on the surface of the sun, existing in 5,500 degrees celsius. dimming it, sucking the life out of it, possibly eating it. the possibility of the 6th extinction happening---a slow, painful one. making the earth perish in the cold before entirely wiping the entire biosphere.
there is padding of feet on the hardwood floor. the frail screech of the door hinges, the sound of the knob being pushed as it locks. phone discarded on the bedside table, the descending of mattress from your behind, sheets rustling, lifted up and placed back down again. you roll over to the side and inhale the smell of soap mixed with a mild minty scent, watching him get comfortable as he opens up the laptop placed on top of his lap.
"do you think they're alive?" the question slips from your mouth faster than you have planned. concerned, slightly agitated.
ryland silently types in his laptop, glasses on the lower bridge of his crooked nose, reflecting what looked to be papers by his students. he leans towards you and place a hand on your arm, fingers tracing shapes onto your skin, trying to think of the right words to say.
"i think," he huffs, pushing his glasses further atop his nose. "that we'll find out for ourselves when the probe gets back." he gives an encouraging nod, hoping that you'd be satisfied by this.
"hey," he shifts. "we'll be alright." hoping to calm your nerves down as much as he hopes it would do the same thing for his.
the night was spent like this---he grades student homework as you keep pushing down your nerves about having alien dots in the solar system under the rug, his hand reaching out to your arm, trailing across your waist, and reaches your abdomen, caressing it.
---
your breath hitches, gaze astray---finally recognizing the silver-colored interior, something that felt so novel at first but so familiar at the same time.
it quickly rises up. feeling lightheaded all of a sudden at the unstable ground you were unaccustomed to.
so that's why.
that's explains the wrongness. the unfamiliarity. it all makes sense, and temporarily eases the confusion. it was the artificial gravity and foreign ground that felt unusually unstable than when you first took a step on it. you were in space.
"it can't be, it doesn't make any sense that-"
"i get it," he interjects. "it's a lot to take in, and - i'm as confused as you are right now, and, god, even my clothes are a mess,"
his statement catches you off guard, disrupting your chain of thoughts, directing your attention instead to the too small jumper he was wearing that forced him to slightly slouch.
"i know, it's a lot to take in-" a chuckle accidentally made its way out of your mouth.
he doesn't hear it. instead continues to ramble about all the information he could gather in the couple minutes he was left alone in the hail mary.
hail mary. a term coined from american football, used to refer to a final act of desperation.
he explains the mission, frantically, chaotic, since it was still fresh from his memory, but comprehensively.
first about the sun. the solar system's sol, the massive star holding it together, was infiltrated by these tiny alien cells, gradually sucking the light that illuminated (planets) for (million years), posing a major threat that could lead to mass extinction. then, the astrophage. the space dots threatening the survival of billions.
tau ceti; the only star in a spill of others to not seem to be dimming despite getting infected and having a petrova line of its own.
explains he already calculated where you were, by using the gravity and star properties. you were confused, looking at the map behind him. there was a star. you were still in the solar system, you could maybe turn the ship around, going back home.
"see here, we're at-"
"at the solar system. that-"
"that's not our sun."
there's ringing in your ears, his voice gradually muffles out. it makes you dizzy, as if the unnatural force that's responsible for keeping your feet on the ground was slowly losing its grip.
it hits your spine, makes your shoulders slouch.
then your throat. quickly rising to catch your tongue as well; making you lose the words.
he continues. explains the the confusion. the memory loss caused by the medically induced coma, done to preserve food, resources, and most especially your sanity for the long trip.
11.9 light years away from earth, but thanks to time dilation, it only felt like 4 years to you.
finally, he tells you about your purpose , why you were sent there. you were unsure how you would do it, wondering why you volunteered in the first place. but you were the only ones left, humanity's only hope. it brings you back.
hail mary. you get it.
he stretches out his hand in front of you, the sleeves rising up his arm.
"i'm sorry, i didn't catch your name, i'm ryland. ryland grace"
"hello dr. grace, welcome to your new lab."
you were so used to with being called ms. grace for so long; at school, at medical appointments. but the addition of the word dr. before it made it feel so foreign. something that all of a sudden felt like it wasn't yours. something that felt like it only had to be followed by your other last name. the one you had just a couple years ago.
"i think it's only right to call you dr. l/n instead? to prevent confusion?"
you blink.
what was that?
was there maybe some sort of connection between you and this man whom you swore you've only met today?
but then you remember the coma, the temporary memory loss.
he asks for your name, sees you hesitate. assures you it would come back sooner or later, says it took him a while to figure his out. you quickly interject, saying your name. or the one that only came to you in a flash of memory anyway.
you shake his hand. it was cold. like there was something you've touched. a subtle weight of a band that felt cool to the touch. but the handshake ends before you could point it out.
"are you hungry? i'm hungry. i could use something to eat." he pouts, caressing his half-shaven face. you remember you were still, possibly, wearing each other's clothes. but if his says his last name, grace, why does yours say the same?
"i need a drink."
---
the uneasiness doesn't go away. even after a good night's rest, even after getting peppered with ryland's consolations, even after the conscious effort of not engaging in anything science-related, especially petrova-related. it stays, lingers, doesn't disappear.
not when you're at work, talking about a century-old piece of literature from some author; your mind was still on the damn dots.
even after one week when eva stratt first came to your school, kidnapped both you and your husband, bringing you in mysterious suvs with not-so friendly men in suits, driving you to a remote location containing the lab you will be working from on the 23rd, when the arc light probe arrives with the sample from the petrova line.
"we want you to be the first ones to take a look at it."
you already left academia years ago, although not entirely---still choosing to pursue a career that still aligned with teaching, educating. but relatively less competitive than the field of paper-writing and peer reviews.
but honestly, it was such a big honor to be given the task. the possibility of being the first people to make contact with life outside of earth thrilled you as much as it wrecked you.
"be here on the twenty-third at seven p.m. i'll have the sample for you."
stratt had ordered for the soyuz that was supposedly to land in russia, to land in saskatchewan instead, letting royal canadian air force to recover the sample, bringing it directly to san francisco via fighter jet. the authority this woman had was just ridiculously paramount that the russians, canadians, and americans follow her orders without question. it was terrifying, but also astonishing. good for her.
your keys rattle as you reach the door. it was starting to get dark out, getting home late than what you normally did because of a meeting you and ryland had to attend about an upcoming school event. your legs feel like noodles, vision starting to tunnel, and you can't seem to find the right key that opens the front door.
the switch clicks when you flick it on. with no time to adjust your eyes to the sudden light illuminating the hallway, you mindlessly kick off your shoes. you drop your bag somewhere along the floor, quickly stripping off your coat and throw it somewhere, stomach already churning.
ryland calls out from the door, just gotten back from parking the car.
"y/n?" his voice was low, but full with concern.
"bathroom?"
you couldn't answer, already kneeling in front of the toilet, fisting the material of your sweater, backtracking what you had possibly eaten that resulted in your situation now.
footsteps then followed your path, quick and clumsy. and then something that sounded like a stubbed toe, and a loud pg version of a curse word.
"god- you okay?" he says, still hissing from pain. gathering your hair with one hand as the other rubbed your back.
you turn to face him, tears still brimming at the edge of your eyes. he took the chance to wipe the beads of sweat on your forehead with the back of his hand and quickly wiped a tear drop that escaped from your eye.
"are you alright? do you want water? how about something warm to drink, y'think your stomach can handle that? what did you even- was it the sandwich? i thought it smelled kind of funky, but i don't think it was bad, i mean it tasted fre-"
"i'm fine." you sniffled.
he helped you get up and flushed the toilet. when you were about to ask, he handed you a hair tie, walking with you towards the kitchen with an arm still up on your back.
you took a seat at one of the chairs, taking a quick glance on the clock, a quarter past 6:00. still had time to freshen up, get a change of clothes, before driving back to the laboratory stratt took you, to take a look at the petrova samples. your arms curled in front of you, resting your head on them, as you hear a clattering of dishes in the background and a turning of the water heater.
ryland returns moments later, now in just his polo, coat hung on one of the chairs, and he pushes a few strands of hair that was still stuck to your forehead and tucked it behind your ear.
"hmm. your hand. feels nice." maybe it was the warmth of his palm, or just the comfort of his presence. maybe both.
"was it," he says nervously, handing you a cup of tea he prepared. "the sandwich?" you chuckle.
"i don't think so. probably just nerves."
"about today? the samples coming in?" you hummed.
"should we just, i don't know, not go?" he suggests. his glasses were crooked on his nose and a few strands of hair were standing up, some plastered on his forehead. you smile, adoring the state he was in.
you shake your head, reaching over to push his glasses a little bit towards the left to straighten it.
"we can't not go, you know." you straighten up.
"besides, wouldn't you want to be the first to make contact with possible alien life?" you jerk up your brow, pressing a quick peck on the side of his head.
"you can prove them all wrong," gathering your things you've discarded in the hall.
"survives on the surface of the sun. sound like a water-based life form to you?"
---
the following few hours since you first woke still feels like a blur.
you now knew about the mission, thanks to grace. but even after everything, all you could still piece together about yourself was your name, and that you know a lot about science---or else you wouldn't be here at all--- but still unsure what you did, who you really were outside all of this.
after awkwardly pointing out the vast difference between how your clothes fit on you, you've decided to switch jumpers, still clueless as to why both uniforms would have the same last name stitched on it.
"hey, i never noticed, yours says grace?" he refers to the name engraved on the upper left part of his chest, and he looked at yours which says the exact same thing. he mentions the bag labels as well.
this was something the both of you couldn’t answer. his memories were coming back, one at a time, and yours just wasn't budging, except that weird moment when a woman you couldn't remember was referring to you as grace. or maybe it was just a jumbled-up memory that lacked context. you waited until you remembered more before bringing it up.
grace, who had a few minutes head start from you, led you to parts of the ship he'd explored alone. the control room, the lab, a very small living corner, and the airlock. the one you used to pay respects to your former crewmates and practicality, to conserve more oxygen and minimize biohazard risk.
you work together to dress them up in your uniform, relieving, for the last time, the feeling of having a complete crew.
you go through their belongings, finding pictures and things that probably had sentimental value to them. gently placing it on them, the remnants of their final memories on earth.
before passing them on, you dedicate a few minutes of silence to your deceased comrades. grace was crying, silently, but you could hear his sniffles and from your peripheral vision, see him wiping his tears. you felt guilty not feeling anything, just standing there, looking at people you have spent months, maybe even years with, that feel like a stranger to you now.
your head hangs low, overcome with remorse, filled with unfamiliar grief.
maybe you weren't meant to be here in the first place. maybe memories weren't coming back to you as quickly as they did with grace because there wasn't anything to relieve in the first place. maybe this was a mistake.
looking at yao and ilyukhina for one last time, a part of you was thinking it should have been you instead.
---
it was intimidating. a few hours back had you feeling sick about what was to happen, and you were afraid that you might throw up all over again.
the laboratory was the same, just a little bit more upgraded as it was now air-sealed and filled with argon, requiring you and ryland to wear hamat suits.
"is this really necessary?" he raises his arms as he spoke.
"yes. now please, analyze the petrova sample." stratt says through the intercom. she was watching on the other side in another room with very thick glass, along with twenty-something other people wearing different military uniforms, just as interested as she was.
"and try not to rip your suit or kink your air line up. if you breathe argon-"
"we suffocate and won't even notice. thanks" you interject, mainly at annnoyance. it felt like you were being used as guinea pigs. the people on the other side probably don't care if you died, making you face all the risk like this.
but you did your best. opened the many layers of the thick container that provided the sample.
"welcome to earth," ryland mumbles as he takes the final container, inside were the black dots.
you both took the samples you needed and started working on tests individually.
ryland mainly did most of the microscopic examination, looking into the dots, seeing them move. he discovers that they were cells, containing organelles and everything else a biologist would hope to see. you studied how they absorb the radiation, as well as to why and how they kept their temperature at exactly 96.415°c.
overall, you two were a damn good team, taking only 24 hours to figure out the basic profile of the dots. this meant that you had to take the day off the next morning, focusing on the tiny alien cells you were working on.
"what would you call an organism that exists on a diet of stars?" one of stratt's questions after another report regarding your discovery about the dots.
"astro," you say, refering to something in space, and squint towards ryland's direction.
"'stro…phage?" he says, struggling to recall his greek and latin words.
"astrophage," stratt said, typing it into her tablet.
"yeah, astrophage." you say, shrugging.
"okay, take a quick break and get back to work. figure out how they breed." she says, disappearing from your line of sight.
you take a the chance to make quick walk to the nearby convenience store, just a few blocks away from the building. it was quite some time since you worked in a lab for hours straight and it drained you, especially since you were the pioneers in experimenting alien life form.
ryland grabs a snicker bar and you get a cup of coffee. you wait a few minutes outside on one of the tables placed around the store, taking a breath in fresh air, unworried of argon suffocation now. sitting in silence, sipping on your coffee, chewing on a snicker, you both quietly enjoy the twilight.
"miss the kids." he says in between a few chews.
"mm," you smile.
"they would be so proud when they hear that mr. grace coined the name for the alien dots in space." you nudge him, taking a sip of your coffee.
you watch him, observing for a while. you can still see the subtle disappointment in his eyes when you found out that astrophage was made almost entirely out of water. he looked fascinated, on how something made majority of h20 could survive in such conditions as the surface of the sun. but you could feel the pensiveness when he was wrong about the only original idea he had.
"can you believe it?" you nudge his shoulder.
"first contact of life outisde ea-"
"i can't wait to start a family with you." he cuts you off.
he's looking at you now, instead of zoning out in front of him. his eyes contained with melancholy, and almost entirely of sincerity.
"i mean, that, if like the sun would get better right? i'm pretty sure it's child abuse to want to raise one in these conditions but- i, what i'm saying is," he starts to ramble off. a habit of his whenever he got flustered or nervous.
"if it all gets better, which, i'm sure it will, i would like to- and only if you want to, of course, y'know. raise kids of our own and have a family and stuff."
---
grace was a genuinely good person to be around with. he was a genuinely kind one at that. and you weren't only saying that because it just so happened that he was the only person you had, you meant it.
just a few days ago, while you were staring out at the stars as the hail mary was travelling, he offered you to watch a film with him in the "don't go crazy" room, plastered with 360 led screens, or you liked to call the projection room.
it had become an unspoken ritual now to watch films with one another, regardless of wether the other doesn't like the movie or not, which so far was not an issue.
the memories are coming along well, painfully slow, but they are slowly getting better. you studied in uc berkeley, had your doctorate in there, too.
biochem, that was what you did. grace was the one that brought this up. said he remembered it when it was mentioned in a meeting. but so far, that was it. you didn't know your family, if you even had one. you didn't know the things you liked, things you couldn't stand. it still feels like you were just stripped of your humanity.
grace, being the kind-hearted person that he was, has the benevolent willingness to keep you company at all times. you were already feeling alone in your head, he didn't want to amplify that by staying away from each other all because you couldn't remember one another.
"i'm sure we were good friends back there, you know? i can just, feel it." he said one time in the middle of your third rewatch of when harry met sally.
you just shrugged and smiled at him, hoping what he felt was right.
"i think we got along really well," he says without looking at you, fidgeting with the band on his finger, a wedding band.
"you married?" the question finally released itself after the curiosity when you shook hands.
he looks at his hand, not realizing the habit he had.
"guess so. can't seem to remember." he raises his hand so you could see it better.
"it'd be pretty sad if i were, no? just leaving the one you loved behind." there was a look on his face, gone in just a quick second. he does a quick smile before looking back at the movie.
usually when you are wearing a wedding ring on your finger, there's a strip of paler skin underneath. covered by it, protecting it from the heat of the sun.
you take a look at yours and notice that you didn't have one.
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