ModernSauce @modernsauce - Tumblr Blog

We sunnin. Hope y’all are staying in that light right now.

Enjoyed the first non-disgusting day outside in 17 years by taking a walk with Ms. Rue! (@bex, sweet tiny Gary and post-walk Starbucks not pictured but integral to the afternoon’s enjoyment).

Time for drinkin and craftin! Santa’s lookin at me like bitch do you really need FOUR beverages to which I reply mind your business you jolly motherfucker.

I don’t know about y’all but the last few months have bookended the spectrum from riotous fun times to absolute hot garbage. Maybe it’s low vitamin D, the fact I have to wait a week between GBBS episodes or a standard mid life crisis but I’m already bored of my own angst. So I did what any normal person does - ran up some credit card debt, travelled and become obsessed with snakes. OBVIOUSLY. Bought myself a sparkly ring and realized, hey, it’s not a midlife crisis I’m just MOLTING! Whew, glad it wasn’t something weird! Can’t wait til the spiritual exfoliation when I turn 40 next year. High five to shedding old skin (and paying off credit card debt 😑).

Behold the Cursed Vine of Truth that is taking over the supplies left by my contractor OVER A MONTH AGO because he hasn’t finished my bathroom. Now, I have a (mostly) fully functioning bathroom but it’s missing some things like pantry doors (he’s building them), floor grout and some small punch list items. Some I can DIY and some I can’t. Just really disappointed in him because we had a future together! I thought he was THE ONE! I’ve used this guy for the last two years so the ghosting is very unlike him. Best guess we can come up with is that he’s got himself in some trouble with another project/vendor and rather than just let me know the problem he’s embarrassed and avoiding my calls and texts. Regardless, I’m moving all his equipment inside and holding them hostage should he ever decide to get back in touch. I may continue to let the cursed vine grow because 1. it’s my aesthetic and 2. to see what else the Cursed Vine of Truth will seek out next!

Who’s this asshole hiding in the finger pull on my mailbox?! He’s the king of the mailbox now that’s who is he is because I drove away so damn fast. Guess I won’t be getting any snail mail anymore. Just address my Christmas cards to Pointy Mailbox King this year thanxbye.

Been fostering some air plants at work (with mixed results... 😬) but looked down and saw this guy had a bloom! If you can zoom in they have teensy little yellow flowers on the end of the purple stem! They look like alien plants. Call Mulder the gardener.

Me, sleeping on my yard chores, in complete denial while the weeds become literal trees. Waiting for that rain this weekend, y’all... 🚜

Had a great, albeit rainy time in Birmingham this weekend with some of my favorite guys. Those guys are “whiskey” and “French fries” but @nicklovelady and @bryan_humphreys made it pretty cool too. 😉💗

Y’all, I’m in love with this print of Paul’s bread masterpiece from GBBS! Thank you, @bex, for my gluten-free gift! 😊💗🥖🦁

Poor Charlemagne has had another rough start to her year. ☹️ She had some skin cancer spots on her ear tips and pre-cancerous spots on her nose so we had surgery to remove them. She’s totally fine and not in any pain - just healing and got some scabs. I, on the other hand, was TRAUMATIZED lol! I cried when I brought her home from the vet and every time I looked at her for like 2 days. I don’t like surgery/sutures or the knowledge that my baby is getting older. But soon she’ll have teddy bear ears and I’ll let you see them all healed! 🐻💗 . . For those with pale/pink pets, her ear tips and nose looked like it had dirt on it for a while. Like, literally just grey/brown “dirt” that you could rub off with your finger. It goes away and comes back - just thought she was getting dirty since she’s outside a lot. Not weird or alarming to look at. BUT this is the pre-cancerous cells sloughing off and will turn into cancerous lesions. It was hard finding info on it online and I just happened to be at the vet for a yearly checkup and asked about it. Please DM if you’re worried about your animals and I’ll answer questions!

Forgot I bought myself some GOOD cherries for when I finished Whole30! It’s like I’m pregaming Valentine’s Day and showing myself the love all week. ❤️🥃🍒 Treat. Yo. Self. I’m using Dr. Thatcher’s because it’s a frozen (dairy-free) pizza kinda night and that shit is good.

Shout out to the people that went to protest Tromp in Chattanooga but I could not muster an ounce of energy for conflict today. Instead I used my energy to CREATE and taught myself macrame!! Thanks, YouTube, for helping me create this tiny little ornament/wall hanging for a... fairy house? IDK. I think she looks like a hip-y lady wearing bell bottoms. She is already a better person than Trimp will ever be and I love her. I think I’ll sell her in my booth.

What an absolutely incredible show Gary Clark Jr put on last night. His live albums are amazing so I knew I had to see him in person. It was a concert I truly did not want to end which is saying a lot because I don’t like to be out past 10. Pretty sure we had a real connection too even at this distance which is important for me becoming his future wife.

Why has it taken me soo long to buy a fascinator when they are like $10 at Amazon?!?!? I’m getting one for every day of the week. Although I did have to duck slightly getting in and out of the car but a small price to pay. (PS my phone screen is cracked, I’m not using a blurry filter. I don’t know which is trashier. But I guess there is no shame when you’re wearing a fascinator anyway so who cares!) Happy Halloween!

It takes a special person to get me near sports-related activities but I had a great time at the Battery in Marietta this weekend celebrating the birthiversary of @nicklovelady. I probably liked it better since there wasn’t a game but maybe I just like having the park to myself. I can’t wait to go back and not watch sports and explore (drink) more! Judd kidding I would totally watch a sport for friendship, obvi.

This container grouping of air plants and friends got me all inspired! Is this the new succulent garden?! My staghorn is getting ready to find out! Saw it at @themerchantatl this weekend at @krogstmarket both of which I just love. I also ate a lot of noodles and stolen dumplings but forgot to document those on account of the bottomless sangria. But I did remember PLANTS. The important things.

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