Biblically Accurate Fuck-Boy

My favorite Pokémon is Roserade, bitch.

[homefryboy]

(commissions open)

[frenzyarts]

She phantom on my opera till I

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[the-muppet-joker]

A Muppet a Day keeps the Devil at Bay

[kibbi3]

this made me emotional

[the-muppet-joker]

When art moves us to tears, it proves we are alive, Laios Has Big Fukin Tits. Always remember that.

[kaijuno]

My morning glory doesn’t like the wind chime

[anythings-a-sweet-if-you-eat-it]

SHUT🤏

[racistspiderman]

More women

[sevey6]

Thank god they decided to make more

[somesaypoetry]

Wow

Dolly Parton has really been hard at work

[cumbacon]

But In doing so…she created her biggest enemy…Jolene

[ichikun]

[wintercorrybriea]

‘viva la death’ boots by into into

[pandor-pandorkful]

@trufflesmushroom

[cryptotheism]

hello there CT. do you have a fursona

I do.

[cryptotheism]

My fursona is a leopard moth named Mattie.

His wings are one of those old nightgowns that femme fatales in old noir movies wear, and his proboscis is one of those long cigarettes. He's like 5'1'' and veryone hates him.

He talks with a transatlantic accent like an old movie star and calls everyone "DAHling" and everyone is like "shut the fuck up Mattie you're from like, Encino California."

He's suspiciously wealthy and lives alone in a huge house. People think he has old money or mob connections but he's actually just a software developer for a medical firm or something. He goes to work in the evening gown and heels and everyone fucking hates it.

He goes to the gym just to take selfies. He has a TikTok that's just him in his stupidly expensive kitchen microwaving frozen chicken nuggets from a bag and calling them "gamefowl wellington ensemble"

[cryptotheism]

He mixes Capri Sun with everclear and drinks it out of champagne flutes. He tells people he's a top but he's objectively garbage at sex.

[cryptotheism]

He's like 23. Nobody ever invites him to things he just kinda shows up.

[cryptotheism]

"DAHling, you call these potato skins loaded? Lord this town is really going to the dogs. May I speak to the chef?"

"Ma'am, I mean Sir- this is a Taco Bell."

"Fine, I suppose it'll do." [He tips the cashier 300$, leaves, and immediately gets hit by a car.]

[alandrosul]

the dog from toy story 1.

[alandrosul]

[radiofreederry]

[nativenews]

[flowersforabel]

It doesn't matter if it's your OC, you shouldn't lewd a minor

Finneas is a 24 year old grown man.

[flowersforabel]

Girl I do no know how to explain that the vast majority of adults used to be children.

[punchline229]

The tags are all great here but this one made me look at it for a couple seconds. I don’t recall jesus being born an adult im very certain he was also a baby at some point

[starfieldcanvas]

there’s a very popular holiday about it, in fact

[b0nkcreat]

what the fuck is going on this year. january through june didnt happen. july is a distant memory. august and september were the longest months of my life. october ended in 5 seconds. why is november here already this isn’t right

[karmiccollector-deactivated2024]

It's the season erosion from the climate crisis, combined with a hyperindividualistic and stress-bound society. It warps your sense of time.

[b0nkcreat]

awesome. how do i stop all that though

[important-animal-images]

[katameme-deactivated20250120]

[teamwhimsy]

Oh my God my vandalism has escaped containment

[nonasuch]

[forcekenobi]

as a child being told "the moon controls the tides" with no additional explanation was like. oh okay. you want me to believe in magic? you're talking about magic right now? okay. fine

[forcekenobi]

sorry. only semi-related but i simply wasn't ready for "the sun is a distant gorilla". thank you NASA

[hyperchaotix]

[teal-deer]

I wish there was a magic skillet I could pick up that would make me literally impossible to fire from a job, no matter how weird or disagreeable people decided I am, where I could still work only part time & ideally with lots of breaks. Like sorry Ms Karen McWasp, I am a load bearing unit and the task will be done when it's done and there's jack shit you can do.

[pseudo-random-neuron-firings]

I know you probably meant "skillset" but I'm having so much fun imagining myself carrying the Skillet of Job Security around my office all the time.

[teal-deer]

I did but yeah the Skillet of Job Security is much more fun

[alliumdykes]

Life’s all fun and games until. Disorder

[intriga-hounds]

can i interest u in a box of friend??

[calellon]

it’s him…… the Grey Earl…………..

[tiniesttinsel]

A most honored guest at the royal ball!