❤ - What's something you feel like your muse needs to work on for a relationship to happen or for a relationship to be healthy? Do you think that's possible? Or is it something that'll likely never happen?
🖤 - What's something that will instantly make them dismiss someone as a romantic partner
I decided to ask you some of the hard ones that haven't been used as much.
You picked the hardest one for me I think. It has been a while since I had to really contemplate about such questions. I hope I answered to them the best I could.
One of the biggest things I had to work on was learning to truly listen, both to my partner and to my own body. I would say I am actually self‑aware in theory, but there were times when knowing about it was no longer enoughand I had to be acting on it.
It can sound silly, but the example I have is the whole shirtless gym thing. I know Seokie loves seeing my naked body in private. I would even send shirtless pictures to him when I am working out in the gym or somewhere else, to tease him. But it took me a moment before fully realizing that my baby didn’t like me being shirtless for everyone else. Not about jealousy, it just meant respecting boundaries and for feelings to be heard. I didn’t see that at first, but once I did, I genuinely changed. I still tease him with such photos, but now, there is truly no one around me to see my body shirtless.
The same applies to my health. Like I said previously, there was a time I ignored my body completely. Skipping meals, pushing through illness, overworking were rather common situations, and I even ended up fainting from a bad fever while Seokie was in the military. I brushed it off at that time, but it scared him deeply. That was the wake‑up call. I didn't need anything else to understand it. Learning to take care of myself was not just about me anymore. It was about respecting how much my partner worried and cared.
So the thing I had to work on, for our relationship to be healthy, and to any relationship to work at all, was listening. Listening to concerns instead of brushing them away, listening to my limits, listening to my own body when it said “stop", listening to others' concerns.
And yes, it is absolutely possible. I am after all the proof that personal growth, when it comes from deep care and love, is one of the best foundations for a healthy relationship.
As for the second question, anyone who isn't my husband hahah.
To be more precise, my last ex was a woman, and she helped, quite unwillingly, to understand that a partner from the opposite gender was not a candidate for my romantic partner. Personality-wise, anyone who is a bland person. A lack of curiosity or accountability makes it impossible for me to feel like they want to get involved in my life. That is usually a dealbreaker.