Jemma looked at the pills with a frown, if it was even possible for her previous frown to deepen that was. She nodded and sighed softly. “Stable….that’s not good. What in the world have you gotten yourself into now, Ward?” She asked, a little bit of sadness in her voice before it went away as she spoke again. “I’ll need a few days to analyze these…I want you to stop taking them until I come up with a conclusion and write down what happens when you stop them one by one starting with the red pill. Your symptoms are going to be very important here…I suppose you can stay here if you need to…”
Grant rubbed the back of his neck. He wished he knew, but he woke up in a lab like a science experiment. He knew what got him into this mess, but he didn’t want to recite his shitty mistakes to her. “I wish I knew,” He said, sighing.
He worried about what would happen if he just didn’t show up to his drop site. He had a phone so they could definitely track him, but would they just call him? He wasn’t sure. But a more pressing issue was what would happen if he stopped taking these pills…
“I don’t think I can stop. When I first met this guy he said if I did, my brain would melt. I don’t know about you, but I’m personally a fan of not dying.”
Jemma frowned slightly at his bitterness. She had quite the bitter taste in her mouth just seeing him. “Fine. Where are the pills?” She asked, figuring the sooner she got this done, the sooner she would be rid of him. She had been through a lot in between them being a team and now but she wouldn’t be angry, just not thrilled.
“I analyze them, figure out what’s in them, and then you leave me alone Ward. That seems fair…are they supposed to be mimicking the adrenaline? And are you experiencing any side effects?” She asked.
Grant pulled a small zip bag from his pocket, it had two white and blue and one red. “Here,” He handed them over. “I couldn’t get any more of the red ones...the last guy who was in the program was hardcore abusing them I guess.” He could understand why, it felt really cool when he was full of energy and then coming down back to normal was awful.
“I don’t know. I was hoping you could tell me...I know when I take the red ones, I feel like I’m indestructible. Like nothing can stop me. Like...cocaine or something, but more controlled. The white ones are like...neutralizers, and the blue ones I gotta take pretty regularly. I don’t know. I was told they ‘keep me stable’, or whatever that means...”
“As far as side effects go, my brain feels fuzzy all the time now. I’m more irritable...the second one was pointed out to me so I’m not sure of anything else. I promise I’ll leave you alone if you help me.”
“You used to be trustworthy. People change.” She remarked before sighing softly. She sat down on the couch and removed her heels, they were killing her.
“I’m curious. Five minutes is all you get before I alert them that you’re here so you best start talking.”
Grant bit his tongue; she got him there. Though for the most part, he didn’t really lie about his feelings towards his team - he just didn’t reveal the whole truth. To him, there was a difference.
He cleared his throat and began: “Three months ago I was on the brink of death after being shot multiple times. I deserved it, I really did, but I woke up inside this government facility and I was told I was saved. Without my knowledge, I was recruited to a program that was stemmed from the same program that created Captain Goddamn America and they told me they had plans for me.”
He paused, his bitterness was showing and he didn’t want to lay that out on Jemma. He sighed and continued, “The thing they gave me is an adrenalin booster. They used it to keep me alive and after Hydra I don’t want to put my trust in something I know nothing about. What they give me is in pill form, and I have some I can give you but I need to know what they’re doing to me.”
They tossed Grant in New York on a mission that went south. Before he left, he got this feeling that this would be the night he could hunt down FitzSimmons. Get some answers about what this program was doing to him, and if there was any way out of it chemically. The way they worked was that they would drop him off and then schedule a pick up - shady government agency doing shady government things.
He got Simmons address from someone who didn’t care enough about their job to keep secrets a secret. He didn’t want to face any possible cameras inside the complex so he climbed up the fire escape and in through the window. It didn’t look like she was home so he waited. He had about two hours to ask her questions, which he hoped was enough time.
Thirty minutes rolled by and he heard the door. He saw his dear old friend and he said, “It’s good to see you Jemma. You look as shiny and healthy as ever. Glad to see Shield didn’t ruin your life.”
Jemma had spent all day at the lab and was ready to go home. She told the others goodnight and took a taxi. She took her stairs two at a time, opening the door with her keys before frowning. She left her gun at the lab. “Ward. Can’t say the feeling is all too mutual. What are you doing here?” Seems like her beer and a bath would have to wait.
Grant frowned. "You used to be so cheerful," He said. She was like a ray of sunshine on the BUS. But, as he greatly discovered, people change. Nothing he could do but press on. He just hoped she would still be kind enough to at least hear him out. If not, he would have had to figure something else out.
"I know I'm not exactly everyone's best friend anymore, but I need help. Your help, specifically," He started. "If you can just give me like, five minutes I can explain everything."
They tossed Grant in New York on a mission that went south. Before he left, he got this feeling that this would be the night he could hunt down FitzSimmons. Get some answers about what this program was doing to him, and if there was any way out of it chemically. The way they worked was that they would drop him off and then schedule a pick up - shady government agency doing shady government things.
He got Simmons address from someone who didn’t care enough about their job to keep secrets a secret. He didn’t want to face any possible cameras inside the complex so he climbed up the fire escape and in through the window. It didn’t look like she was home so he waited. He had about two hours to ask her questions, which he hoped was enough time.
Thirty minutes rolled by and he heard the door. He saw his dear old friend and he said, “It’s good to see you Jemma. You look as shiny and healthy as ever. Glad to see Shield didn’t ruin your life.”
Grant found his way into the cellar of a very old Hydra base. From the exterior it looked as if it had been abandoned for years, but subtle clues let him know that it was recently active. The doors were coded and locked up tight, the codes only changed recently from what his intel provided. A very thin layer of dust covered the labs and weapons vaults he found. He was looking for something more specific than some guns and medicine.
He was tearing the place apart, ripping through wooden crates with ease. He wasn’t really a fan of taking pills all the time, but the effects of the red ones were nice. Grant didn’t like feeling indebted to Project Homegrown, but as long as they let him out into the field, he really couldn’t complain.
As Grant demolished most of the warehouse, he was getting tired of finding nothing of value. He gripped the lid of another box and tried tearing off the lid. This one wouldn’t budge. He didn’t realise it wasn’t wood like the others (a side effect of the reds). When he attempted to lift the metal crate off the shelf, he started hearing footsteps, and there was a trail of destruction that led right to him. If this was truly what he was looking for, he didn’t want to leave empty handed. He also didn’t want to leave in handcuffs.
He wasn’t supposed to take more than one red at a time, but he was greatly considering it.
Grant instead chose to stand his ground. He walked forward into the darkness of the cellar towards the footsteps. “Whoever you are, I hope you know I’m not going anywhere without a fight.”
God, for a secret agent, Ward was behaving about as flexibly as a brick and twice as dense. it took all of Karla’s self-control to not roll her eyes.
“…this whole plan goes up in flames,” he whispered.
“Like I would let that happen,” she replied.
And then Kamala begged that Karla not hurt him and Karla pretended to be seriously contemplating it (okay, maybe it wasn’t that much pretending).
But then something interesting happened. Kamala took advantage.
It was subtle, really. Kamala had switched from pleading for his safety to questioning Ward. She was taking advantage of his position, knowing damn well his life was in the hands of the woman fully capable of destroying him. She had positioned herself as the one thing that could keep him alive and plead with the destructive force before him and then demanded answers.
Of course the girl would never admit that, and perhaps it was all in Karla’s head, but she saw it and Karla felt an odd feeling stir. The only term that came close to describing it was “pride.”
Ice blue eyes fell back to the man before her. “I was right, wasn’t I? SHIELD isn’t as clean as everyone likes to believe.”
She could use this to her advantage and sew the seeds of doubt in the girl’s mind. Sure, it was a bit manipulative, but it wasn’t a lie. Not completely.
She let go of him and took a step back.
“This Agent is going to leave now. He’s going to leave knowing that I will destroy him if he lands a hand on you again, and knowing that you are the reason he is alive.”
A glance to Ward, then to Kamala, and back again.
“We’ll be in touch, Agent. I feel that we have plenty to discuss.”
Kamala was asking questions, meanwhile Karla was pushing him out. He grit his teeth, holding his tongue. While he spent a few seconds deciding whether or not to run, he looked over to the he teenager. He felt bad for her; she was about to be a casualty of Shield’s infractions. Grant finally had everything ready to drop the bomb, and he couldn’t let his personal feelings get in the way. Not now, not ever.
We’ll be in touch, Agent. I feel that we have plenty to discuss.
Grant looked back to Karla. He smoothed his shirt where she grabbed him and he kept his attention fixed on her. Why was she protecting Kamala? There was more rage in her voice than if this was just a chance encounter for her to prove she’s not all bad. He pushed past Karla, knocking against her shoulder as he walked by.
“We have nothing to discuss.”
Grant started down the street and he gripped the file in his hand tightly. He stopped and turned back to Kamala. He couldn’t chase her down and give her nothing. “Be careful who you trust. This isn’t your fight. It’s better you know nothing.”
Not the best advice, but maybe she could bug Karla for answers. After all, she was the one who brought him into this whole scheme in the first place.
It won’t be long
‘Til I’m dead and gone
Watch the fires rise under my skin
Down to the bone, scorching my soul
Nowhere to run
Nowhere to run
Nowhere to run
There's a reckoning a-coming, and it burns beyond the grave
Its lead inside my belly ‘cause my soul has lost its way
Oh, Lazarus. - how did your debts get paid?
Oh, Lazarus - were you so afraid?
The paramedics arrived quickly - they were called after the first shot thirty minutes prior.
It was hard to breathe. His chest hurt...he was only getting blurs of motion as they were working. Grant wasn’t sure how long he was out. He wasn’t sure what was real, what was dreamed...
What he did know is that he kept waking up with blaring white lights around him and there was a breathing mask on his face. Every so often he would feel the pressure of someones hand somewhere on his body. The last time he woke up, someones hand on his wrist. His eyes could barely open because it was so bright, but there was a fuzzy person sitting next to him.
There were voices going on around him and he couldn’t understand what they were saying, but they sounded familiar. Conspiring around him were his brothers:
Thomas arrived a couple hours after Christian called him. They sat silently in the ICU staring blankly at their brother laying near-dead in the hospital bed.
“The doctors were talking about life support before you got here,” Christian said. He walked over and grabbed Grant’s wrist, checking his pulse. It was so faint, the monitors were barely picking up on it. “I think it’s best if we just let nature take its course.”
Thomas swallowed hard. He kept his eyes fixated on Grant. “This is all your fault, you know.”
Christian rolled his eyes. “Oh come on, that was so long ago. Can’t we just move on?”
“You had him torture me until he snapped. He’s been fucked up ever since, and all you wanted to do was play your stupid games.”
“It doesn’t matter. He’s made too many lives hell, it’s only fair he pays the price for this.”
Thomas turned to look at Christian. “Is this the senator talking? Or my vengeful brother?”
Grant passed out again, he stopped hearing their muffled conversation.
-- --
Not a spell gonna be broken with a potion or a priest
When you're cursed you're always hoping that a prophet would be grieved
Can't you see I'm sorry? I will make it worth your while.
Made a dead mans money you can see it in my smile.
Grant lost feeling in his fingertips by the end of the second day in the hospital. Christmas, no less. He wasn’t conscious much that day, but he was awake long enough to hear the doctor tell him Christian refused life support. He didn’t have any voice or energy to dispute that. This would be his fate. Laying down for the rest of his life, unable to do anything for himself. He imagined this is how his parents would have wanted to go.
He ruined that, didn’t he?
Grant was trapped in his own mind and he spent a lot of time thinking about who he was and what he had become. He eventually remembered his family, his siblings. His parents. He set his parents on fire. He very nearly drowned his brother. He hadn’t seen his sister in years because she was terrified of him. It was far too late to apologise to anyone...not that he would. He couldn’t. No one would believe his sorrows, or they’d argue that he’s been ‘playing the victim’ again or something nocuous like that.
It was getting harder to breathe with every passing hour. If it wasn’t for the breathing mask, his body would have shut down. Every so often a nurse would come in and change his bandages, and that was the only thing he could really sense. He was so weak, his eyes wouldn’t stay open.
The last thing he remembered hearing was speaking - it was muffled but inside the room. Whatever was happening was causing quite a lot of problems. Then he felt lots of hands, movement, and then everything stopped.
-- --
When the fires, when the fires have surrounded you
And the hounds of hell coming after you --
When the fires, when the fires are consuming you
And your sacred stars wont be guiding you --
His eyes opened to see a giant bright light. The stories were true - the first thing people are welcomed with once they die was a blinding light. Proof that they’ve left the mortal plane an ascended somewhere...
No. This isn’t right.
He was conscious, no longer in excruciating pain. Just dull, ache in his shoulder and upper chest where he was shot. His eyes started to focus and the light above him was regular flourescent. Grant jolted upright and tried to compute what was going on.
The room looked like a regular recovery wing at the hospital. There was shitty art on the wall, what looked like a bathroom connected...and a creepy guy sitting in a chair on his laptop.
“Where the hell am I?”
The guy in the chair looked up, closed their laptop and quickly rushed out.
“Hey!” Grant called out, but it was too late. He sat back, on the bed - he had cords coming out of all sorts of places on his body, the last thing he wanted to do was rip something out.
Moments later an older gentleman in a lab coat walked into the room.
“I didn’t expect you to wake up today. You gave us a nasty scare,” The man said, as he started checking the monitors behind the bed.
“Who are you? What happened?”
“My name is Doctor Kozlov, I’ve been treating you for the last few weeks. Your siblings denied you life support which didn’t give us much time to work. You’re quite the fighter, though.”
Grant eyed the doctor up and down. He felt almost 100% better and it had only been a few weeks. The name ‘Kozlov’ didn’t ring any bells, and he would be damned if Hydra snatched him up again. He spent so many months filled with regret over ruining his entire life, the last thing he wanted was to go back to the organization that made him sink so low. He was such an idiot. He looked down at the IV’s in his arms and saw all of his scars.
Everything was kind of a blur, but the moments before Maria shot him were still etched in his brain. He wasn’t sure if he was dreaming at all while he was...knocked out, passed out, or whatever they did to him, but it was still at the forefront of his mind.
-- --
It wont be long til I'm dead and gone
Watch the fires rise under my skin
Down to the bone, scorching my soul
Nowhere to run
“Just do it already. You’ve been leading up to this for the last thirty minutes. Shoot me and get it over with.”
The barrel was placed firmly on his forehead. He was losing grip on his sanity. He could feel his true colors shining through. Grant had broken himself, and he didn’t want to keep hearing Maria tell him how his life was or how horribly he screwed up. “I thought you of all people would understand. You said I dragged you down, but you’re back on top of the world. I have nothing.”
She kept trying to interrupt him so his voice got louder: “I felt something with you, Maria. It’s something I’ve never felt before for anyone. I saw the way you would look at me, I know it wasn’t just me. I think I - “
Maria interrupted him. “If you say those words I swear I will shoot you. Now let go of me.”
Grant wasn’t going to say ‘i love you’, but her reaction was so quick...so sincere. The look in her eyes was serious. He was going to say that he knew why they connected so much. That night when he saw her scars and she opened up to him was the first time he felt something for anyone. It was stronger than whatever the hell was happening with Skye - definitely not love, but a kinship. He told her the absolute Truth and for the first time he didn’t feel like she was just another mission. If he didn’t follow through with his plan, maybe something real could have happened, but at the time he had too much at stake.
“This is your last chance to run. I don’t want to help you do something you won’t have the chance to regret.”
All that power, the rush of glory and feel like he won...where did it leave him? Laying on the floor of her bathroom, hoping that maybe he went deep enough. Staying just a little bit too long under the bath water. Not being careful about how many pain meds he had for a headache. He was tired of feeling guilty.
I have nowhere to run.
He took a deep breath - the last painless breath he hoped he would ever take. He let it out slowly. He felt his whole body calm as the last bit of air left his lungs. He opened his mouth - at least he thought his last words would be meaningful.
-- --
When the fires, when the fires have surrounded you
And the whole wide world coming after you
I've got blood, I've got blood
Blood on my name
Dr. Kozlov handed Grant a medicine cup with a blue capsule pill. “Here, Take this.”
“What is it?” He asked, staring into the cup.
“It’ll help you relax.”
Grant had been feelings pretty tense, but he attributed that to being more or less asleep for the last month.
“You guys aren’t Hydra, right? I mean, why am I even here?” Shouldn’t I be dead or something?
Dr. Kozlov had been writing something down ever since he walked into the room. Like he was recording every little change in the monitors. But this made him stop. “On the contrary, Mister Ward, our organization has been an enemy of Hydra since the 40′s, when we were founded. Tell me, have you ever heard of the Weapons Plus program?”
Grant shook his head.
“I’m surprised you haven’t, after all Hydra’s biggest enemy was their first experiment. You do know who Captain America is, right?”
Oh.
“The history has always seemed rather sketchy on paper, which is why we’ve gone underground. As I said, he was only the first project; I run project seven, or codename Homegrown. Many people have tried to recreate the serum that created the Captain to no avail. I, however, made something even better.”
The doctor picked up two other medicine cups that were just out of his sight. He held them out. “The blue one I just gave you is a relaxer. It’ll keep you stable. This white one here will calm you down. From what you might be asking yourself, and that’s what this third one is. This red pill here will give you a powerful adrenaline boost. It’ll keep you going for days, but at the same time could melt your brain, so to speak, if you don’t have these other two to even yourself out between doses.”
That wasn’t too much to process, except for the fact that he was put into some weird super soldier program without his consent. He didn’t have to ask why he was already given a blue pill if they hadn’t been pumping his body full of the red stuff.
“Why would you pick me?”
“You had the second highest scores in all categories at Shield, save for communication. You semi-single handedly brought down the entrie organization, leaving Hydra open to be finally destroyed once and for all. You are listed as one of their members, but your betrayal made us very interested in your skills. We would have recruited you sooner, but you fell off the grid until you were hospitalised on Christmas Eve.”
Grant wasn’t sure what to think or how to react. Was he supposed to be grateful they saved him?
“What happens if I don’t want to join in...whatever this is?”
Dr. Kozlov adjusted his glasses and folded his hands together. “Well, I would probably just cut you loose. But because you weren’t properly weaned off the adrenaline, your body will crave it. Drive you mad. So either you go out there and risk insanity or stay here and get back out in the field with a whole new set of fun new tricks.”
Neither of those options really sounded appealing. But someone decided it wasn’t his time to leave the ‘mortal plane’, so maybe it was worth a chance. Grant dumped the blue pill in his mouth and swallowed.
“That’s what I thought. Welcome to Weapon VII, Mister Ward.”
It would honestly have been funny if it wasn’t so frustrating. There Karla was, casually sipping tea and browsing the latest news articles on her phone, and then she saw it. From her booth, she could see out the window and down the street.
There was a familiar young girl in familiar cosplay racing in her direction, with a larger man desperately trying to keep up with her.
The scene itself wasn’t funny, but the sheer ridiculous coincidence of it all was close to it. The man key to her plan was chasing after a girl who was almost equally essential to a completely different scheme, both completely unaware that the other had any connection to Karla. To top it off, the two were equally linked to entities she despised given that the man was masquerading as SHIELD and the girl was the next iteration of Ms. Marvel.
Irony? Eh, close to it at least. What was far more ironic was that every time Karla came to this place to relax, frustration literally raced toward her.
In a moment, she had exited the cafe into a nearby alley. Kamala would turn down that alley. It was basic evasion technique.
Sure enough, the girl did and nearly ran smack into her. Karla caught her shoulders and kept her from falling. Instinctively the girl went to swing at her, no doubt mistaking Karla for some accomplice of Ward’s (good instincts), but stopped when the moment of recognition hit her face.
“What’s going on?” The question wasn’t filled with confusion or concern, but coldly calculating. It was phrased as a request for assessment. Kamala responded quickly.
“I knew you were around here but I had no idea-”
“Do you want help or not?” Karla released her shoulders.
That seemed to do the trick, as if a switch had been flipped in Kamala’s head. Train of thought: redirected.
“SHIELD. I thought he was a good guy and he’s a SHIELD agent but something’s wr-”
At that moment, Ward’s footsteps were damn close. Karla’s clothing melted away in an array of spark-like lights, replaced with her Moonstone outfit. Might as well sell the hero angle.
“Someday, someone will listen to me.”
It was a pipe dream, probably. She seemed doomed to be perpetually ignored. Well, it was going to be pretty damn hard to ignore her this time.
Ward turned the corner to find Karla standing behind Kamala. He opened his idiotic mouth.
“What are you doing here?”
He was going to ruin everything. Thankfully, one of them could think on her feet.
“Sorry, Agent. Some of us don’t like to stay in cells.” Suddenly she had rushed forward and her fist came into contact with Ward’s stomach. Not full force, granted, but certainly enough to knock the wind out of him.
“So are you a SHIELD agent or a HYDRA idiot chasing after a young girl at night? I’m not a fan of either, Agent, so I don’t really care which story you want to spin me.” That was at least true. They were both bloated, bureaucratic-laced regimes filled with Nazis and blurry morals at this point. A purposeful backhand against his cheek followed. Again, not full force, but hard enough to leave a bruise.
Logically, it would make sense to kill him. If her little charade was real, he would just be some SHIELD or HYDRA foe that would report back to his team and rally troops to kill her or Kamala or both. The problem was that none of this was real and he was actually a pretty useful piece to keep on the board.
She couldn’t sacrifice her bright-eyed pawn and couldn’t take away the enemy’s traitorous knight. New plan.
Her fingers gripped the front of his shirt and jerked him slightly, bringing him in as she leaned in and lowered her voice. Careful adjustment and her voice was not too low for Kamala to hear.
“I don’t know what mess you made, Agent, but find another way to clean it up. Touch her and I won’t hold back.”
Hopefully he would be smart enough to catch on. The man was a decent agent after all. He had to have at least some experience reading between lines.
Grant couldn’t even begin to pretend he was stronger than Karla. They weren’t even playing the same sport in terms of strength. She could probably level a building by herself or something and the best he could do is break someones bones. He was outnumbered. A lowly Shield agent, conditioned to be at the peak of physical fitness couldn’t take on an Inhuman and an experiment. He looked between the woman and the teenager. He didn’t want to hurt Kamala. He wanted to keep her quiet, stop her from asking the wrong people questions.
He tried catching what little breath he had - he didn’t even have any before Karla punched him in the stomach. He was gasping for air for a solid ten seconds before he managed to fill his lungs again. After that, Karla snatched up his shirt.
“I’m a Shield agent and I have no plans to hurt Kamala, not that you’d believe me,” He spoke loud so the teenager could hear him. Grant wrapped his hand around Karla, tightening his grip as hard as he could. He wasn’t against tearing his shirt to get away from the two of them. He was tired as fuck from running, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t try to run away.
His voice lowered so only Karla could hear, “How do you know her? Was this some kind of setup?” The last thing he needed was another spy on board. He had his suspicious about May for a long time, he still couldn’t confirm. “If she says anything to anyone this whole plan goes up in flames.”
White hot anger boiled inside of her as she listened to the phone ring. It was frustration, and tears, everything indefinable she felt turned into an emotion she could comprehend. She closed her eyes, trying not to think about everything that Ward had told her. The more she thought about it, the more sense it started to make. Denial was better. There was no judgement, no finality. She wouldn’t believe it, not until she had all the information in front of her.
Ward strode forward before she even had time to react. The phone flew out of her stinging hand and onto the asphalt a few feet away. The ringing stopped. The agent towered over her, showing a side of himself that she had never seen. He stared down at her with a fire in his eyes. Clenched his teeth as he spoke, like he was physically holding himself back from her… This wasn’t the man that had taught her how to spar. He was someone else entirely, and she didn’t like it.
“What are you doing?” She glared right back up at him, but the quiver in her voice betrayed her true feelings. She was scared, scared of the man she thought of as her friend. It suddenly occurred to her that Ward may not have been as trustworthy as she once thought. If he could hide this other side so well, why not everything else?
Her heart beat fast, pumping her veins full of Adrenalin. Blood roared in her ears, blocking everything else out. She wanted to get away, she had to get away. If she couldn’t call someone, she would tell them the old fashioned way. This situation would be exposed, one way or another.
With a yell, Kamala drove her shoulder into his chest with all the force a 5’4” girl could muster. He stumbled backwards, giving her the opening she needed to run. Her eyes flickered momentarily to the phone she was leaving behind.
“Sorry Ami and Abu.”
Hopefully the Quinn Jet was still where she had last seen it.
Grant wanted Kamala to back down, but he underestimated her. She pushed him with probably her full force, and if he wasn’t so surprised he would have braced himself more. He staggered backwards long enough for her to make her escape. Dammit.
“Get back here!” He shouted before taking off after her.
Kamala was faster than he was - she made that clear earlier, but he wasn’t going to let her get away. He went running off after her, gripping the files tightly to make sure they wouldn’t fly away in the wind. He ran as fast as his feet could carry him, not really catching up but not falling behind either. It was far too late to apologise...that moment was gone. Now he just needed to scare her into staying quiet. He couldn’t risk her going to Coulson before he had a chance to finish his mission. He was buidling up to this for so long, he was not about to let her ruin everything.
Since he took a different way to the alleyway, he had no idea where the BUS was. Or how Kamala even got to this area. For all he knew, she was doing her regular Ms. Marvel stuff and stumbled upon him. He fucked up so badly. Karla would be so pissed to find out that a kid could foil everything.
When she turned a corner, Grant tried to speed up but his legs were starting to fail him. He envied anyone enhanced - or anyone with a stronger endurance. But he couldn’t lose her, and as he turned the corner he ended up nearly tripping over his feet to stop. Kamala was standing in front of him with Karla - or, the Moonstone. He recognized the outfit from the archives when he was looking her up.
“What are you doing here?” He said through extreme heaving breaths. His lungs were on fire.
Kamala’s hands shook as she stared down at her cell phone. Her vision began to blur as tears formed in the corners of her eyes. She didn’t know who to believe, or even what to believe. How could Ward be so confident about condemning his own teammate? Whatever was in that file…It couldn’t be everything. There had to be some sort of mistake, something he had overlooked. If it criminalized Coulson, it could also clear his name. They just had to dig deep enough to find the missing piece.
“What…What if it is his job? He’s a level seven agent; he has no reason to tell us everything.” Kamala blurted out. It was clear even to her that she was grasping for straws. “He’s saved so many people… Can what he’s doing really be so bad?”
“I don’t know if he’s even loyal to Shield.”
The words resounded in her head, louder and louder until she could no longer ignore them. Coulson didn’t seem like a double agent, but that was the point wasn’t it? To blend in and gain peoples trust. It sounded fake, pretend, like one of those spy movies. She just couldn’t picture her mentor sneaking around, stealing files, relaying information on park benches. He was too nice, too compassionate to double cross them like that.
Kamala took a breath, trying to steady her hands. “What are you doing? You’re sneaking around just like he is. Do you think you’ll make things better by going behind the teams back too? If you have proof than there’s no reason to keep it from them anymore. We’ll show them the file and figure this out together.”
She bit her lip, staring Grant defiantly in the eye as she dialed Skye’s number. She would know what to do. With her hacking skills, she could settle things in minutes.
Grant saw her starting to crumble. If she started crying or something, he had no doubt someone on the street would come questioning him.
What…What if it is his job?
“I’m a level seven agent. So is May. Half the time she doesn’t even know what he’s up to!” Though May was about equally suspicious. She is such a silent, stoic figure...even after sex, she didn’t even give him any signals of ‘good’ or ‘bad’. She just left him hanging. Not to mention her secrets had secrets. “If it’s his job to use us as pawns to hurt people, wouldn’t you want to know?”
You’re sneaking around just like he is.
“Kamala, you really don’t understand this situation. This is what I do, this is what I was trained for. The team is so loyal to him, they don’t know what he is capable of. The things he’s done...the people he has hurt.” He sighed, to make it look like this was a hard thing to do. “I am a spy for Shield, and that’s what they ask me to do. I don’t get paid to question my job, I just do it. It doesn’t feel good going behind the backs of the team, but I couldn’t not know the truth.”
His words didn’t seem to be getting through to her because she pulled out her phone anyway. “Kamala...” She was staring him right in the eye as she started dialing something. “Don’t do this.”
Grant heard the solid beep that the other line was ringing. He quickly stepped forward and knocked the phone onto the ground. He hit it with enough force to stop the phone call before it connected through to the other line, and he stared down at Kamala.
Through gritted teeth, he demanded, “Don’t. Call. Anyone.”
I'll write a drabble of our character's making love together.
SMUT WARNING
[apparently mobile doesn’t want to register the read more]
Hank took Grant’s hand and led him intothe bedroom. Their night before this started off with a lovely dinnerfilled with laughter, pleasant conversation, soft kisses…gentlecaressing…
Grant’s heart was in his throat. He wasexcited and curious; the way Hank looked at him made him feel like hewas on top of the world. It was just the two of them, together. Theysat down on the edge of the bed and he leaned in for a kiss –melting beneath his lips, he began to relax. He wrapped his armaround Hank’s waist, and as he bent forward, his hand touched thebare skin beneath his shirt. He heard him let out a gasp in betweendeep kisses, and he let his hand ride up his back.
His cold doctors skin sent a shivverdown Grant’s spine, oh God. His sweater was being pulled upand over his head, and Hank cast it aside with such grace and ease.His experience was showing as he pushed Grant down on his back andsucked gently on his neck. Grant couldn’t contain his pleasure filledmoans as the older man started to unbutton his pants. He tracedkisses down Grant’s chest, until Hank’s face was mere inches awayfrom the pants tent.
Grant could feel himself blushing, theheat washing over his entire body. He had never gotten this far withany man before, but Hank was so determined and strong. He felt hispants slide down to his feet, and the cool air touched every part ofhis now naked body. Hank finally took his shirt off, and kicked hispants off to the ground.
Hank crawled on top of him, and Grantcould feel his manhood twitch as hit brushed up against the otherman’s body. Their pelvises rocked together as their lips clashed oncemore, their tongues battling. Both of them were letting out deepmoans, and Grant could barely contain his excitement. He could feelhimself building up to explode. Hank pulled away once more, Grantleaning up on his elbows, his body begging for more.
He saw Hank grab a tiny bottle frominside the nightstand drawer and he squeezed something onto hisfingertips and rubbed them together. He placed his fingers right onthe edge of his tight asshole and traced around the entrance with hisslippery fingers. He pushed one inside, and Grant let out a loud,half painful, half pleasured moan. Hank repeated this action a fewtimes, and eventually the pain subsided. Grant watched as he pouredsome of the liquid all over his penis and his eyes widened. He placedthe tip right at the entrance, and the pressure alone took his breathaway.
“Are you ready?”
The two had fooled around before;mainly digital sex, and it had all been building up to thisexperience. The crowning moment of their relationship, takingeverything to the next level. He couldn’t believe that this washappening. Grant gripped tightly on the bed, and nodded, whisperingthe word, “Yes.”
Hank pushed the tip inside, and Grantlet out a shout. It wasn’t entirely painful, he had been welllubricated. He was being filled to the brim, and he slowly pumpedback and forth. Grant couldn’t keep his hands still anymore, hewrapped his hand around his own dick and started jerking himself off.The anal penetration mixed with his own hand was too much to handle.He couldn’t last. He came everywhere, not even a minute later. He wasso embarassed, but Hank only laughed a little and pulled Grantforward to kiss him.
“I’m sorry,” Grant said, after Hankpulled away.
“Why?” He asked, as he thrust onceagain, “We’re just getting started.”
Her fists clenched tighter as she tried to absorb his words. Coulson had been the first one to welcome her when she joined his team. He had made her feel at home in an otherwise new and overwhelming environment. He was a mentor to her and a leader who always did what was best for his team. She just couldn’t see him as a bad guy. Not the man who had gotten as excited as she had when he showed her his superhero memorabilia.
“How do you even know she was telling you the truth? I don’t know exactly what she told you, but there’s no way she’d know more about him than his own team.” Kamala said, her voice shaking.
She wouldn’t… She couldn’t believe that he was corrupt. Whatever Coulson was doing with TAHITI, whatever SHIELD was planning…There had to be a reasonable explanation for it all. Their job was to make the world a better place by defeating villains like HYDRA and AIM. They saved people and prevented others from getting hurt. That was why she joined the organization in the first place, to do good. To hear that all this time, she had really been working for something more sinister… She wouldn’t accept it. Not until she talked to Coulson herself and got an explanation.
“He’s… He’s just busy running the team, you know, doing paperwork and spy stuff.” Her voice was stronger now, like she was trying to convince herself. She knew she could trust Ward, he was her teammate. He looked equally heartbroken by the information, like he didn’t want to believe it. Coulson was his friend too; he had no reason to lie.
But then something didn’t feel right. She didn’t know if it was the manila folder in his hands, or his meetings with sketchy informants in dark alleys… One question nagged at the back of her mind: why hadn’t he come to the rest of the team when he had first met with that woman? Why had he kept it to himself all this time?
“What if this woman was lying? What if that guy was too? They could be trying to create mistrust between us. Coulson is reasonable. We can talk to him and the rest of the team, everything will get sorted out.” She bent down to retrieve the phone out of her boot. It felt heavier than usual in her palm.
“We can call someone right now.”
“Kamala, you have to trust me. He’s not a good person, and these files prove it. I know it hurts to hear but you have to believe me.”
Grant actually felt a little bad lying to her, but to be fair Coulson wasn’t the best person in the world. He cared way too much about his team and their wellbeing, and it got them all nearly killed too many times. He almost sacrificed Simmons because he didn’t want to recruit the help of other people to try and save her. Plus that whole scenario just made Fitz want to get closer to Grant, which was really irritating. That other mission they went on didn’t help either...he was so needy, and while it wasn’t directly Coulsons fault, it was his team.
But none of that would prove to Kamala that he was a bad person. That only made Grant look like a grump who didn’t want to socialize with anyone. But the files in his hand were everything...he just couldn’t let her leave. And he cursed his human form because she, as an enhanced being, could do so much more than he could.
“Coulson’s not a spy, that was never his job. But he’s sneaking around like he’s undercover, doesn’t that make you wonder? Doesn’t it make you want to question what he’s up to? He’s not doing his job, he’s doing someone elses. I don’t know if he’s even loyal to Shield.”
Woah. Back up. Don’t try and leak anything yet.
Kamala wanted to call someone. The only person they could call would be someone at Shield, and anyone there would doubt him. He really wished Karla or something would show up because he needed someone else on his side. She seemed like a perfect manipulator who had no problem lying to kids. Grant didn’t normally have problems, but dammit...he had gotten too close.
“We don’t need to call anyone. I have no reason to lie to you, would I? I couldn’t come to the team, not until I knew for sure. I didn’t want to break peoples trust without proof...I’m so sorry, Kamala.”
Grant sat alone in the holding cell, waiting to be called up for questioning. The day Shield fell and went into a complete chaos made him feel great. He was at the top of the world, and everything he had ever dreamed of was falling into place. He couldn’t believe that in mere months of preparation, he would have enough information to take down one of the largest government agencies in the world.
But he finally came crashing back to reality when he received a call from Maria’s prosecutor. Through all of his euphoria he forgot about the one person that had become genuinely important to him. The woman that he got in way too deep with.
Maria was supposed to be an assignment. She was just one of the names on the list of people he was supposed to bring down with everyone else. But that first day, when he saw her so broken over her interaction with Mystique, he saw an opening. He didn’t know he’d actually get feelings for her - he just wanted to be her friend, to be there for her. And then she asked him to help move her into her apartment after he scared her out of her old one. He saw her genuinely laughing at weak jokes he was making, and how when he dropped a box on his foot she seemed so genuinely concerned for him. And after they finished, she offered him food. They sat around trying to get her TV to work and she was smiling. Oh god, and her eyes…
When he kissed her, it was all over. But he still had a mission to complete. The prosecutor found out about their relationship and asked him to testify against her. In the heat of the moment he agreed, but sitting in that holding chamber all morning made him feel so much regret. Not for the rest of Shield, just for Maria. If he said anything good about her, it could bring everything into question.
They finally called out his name and he was escorted to the stand. He looked right at Maria and he could see fear in her eyes. He turned his head towards the prosecutor.
“Please state your name for the record.”
“Grant Ward.”
“And what is your relationship to the defendant?”
“I’m her,” He glanced over at Maria again, he saw her fists clenching on the table. “I’m her boyfriend.”
There were some audible gasps from some people in the room. The prosecutor walked up close to him and began his questioning: “Mr. Ward, you were asked here to testify against Commander Hill because you have clear evidence regarding her involvement with Hydra. Is that right?”
“Yes sir, it is.”
“What is this evidence?”
He clasped his hands together and leaned forward towards the mic attached to the railing. “For the last six months or so, I’ve been watching Maria closely. I have already submitted all of the evidence against her in a flash drive that I gave to the Secretary of Defense. She worked on multiple investigations for Hydra off the books, and she also did some dealings with mutants.”
“Dealings with mutants? We discussed that earlier, but she never made any mention on that. Do you care to elaborate?”
Grant was almost excited to start talking about his amazing plan, but there was some strange force pulling at his mind trying to get him to stop talking. Was this his conscience? He tried so hard not to look over at Maria again, seeing her angry might make him…
“...Maria met with Doctor Hank McCoy near the end of July. She asked him for protection against the Brotherhood, and instead he ended up giving her a shot. Technically, as of that day, she became a mutant.” More gasps game from the audience. “That’s what I meant. She didn’t up and join the X-Men or anything.”
The prosecutor had this smile on his face that made him look like he just won the jackpot. Maria was probably bubbling with anger. He was spilling her secrets in an open court, and he couldn’t stop himself. Or...maybe he just didn’t want to?
After a few more invasive questions, he clarified that she was indeed investigating Hydra off the books. He tried to be vague as to why. God. Why did I agree to this? It would have been so much easier with Coulson. He never really liked that self-righteous bastard anyway. He was so restrictive and that made his secrets so much bigger. He hated himself, but since he took the stand he was trying not to lie about anything. It was the least he could do to be vaguely incriminating instead of blatantly lie in front of the jury.
Maria’s lawyer finally stepped up. His eyebrows were crinkled and he stepped up to the stand and leaned his palm on the railing.
“So, let me get this straight. You and Maria are in a relationship, and yet you’re sitting here testifying against her?”
“I - “ He wanted to defend himself, but at this point there was nothing else to say except: “Yes.”
“Disregarding any deals you may have with the court, would you mind explaining why?”
Grant stared blankly at the counselor, trying to think up something, anything, to say to make him not seem like as much of a dick. He didn’t have any deals with this specific court, but he supposedly had immunity for being a member of Hydra. The hand cuffs made him think otherwise, but until he was formally charged with something he figured they were just because he was a legitimate known criminal.
He bowed his head and spoke quietly into the mic. “Six months ago, before I started watching over Maria, I was approached by someone with the resources and the means to take down Shield. This person specifically asked me to find as much incriminating evidence against Director Fury, Phil Coulson, and Maria Hill. So I did.”
“Why was this person so interested in those three individuals?”
Grant sighed. “If something were to ever happen to Shield, they would be the most likely candidates to go down fighting. They may have even tried to rebuild it.”
Saying everything out loud really made everything sink in. He never really said out loud what his intentions were or what he was doing, even when he got all the tampered evidence packets to put in the Shield archives. He just asked for certain things and then a week later he would have the files to plant and replace. Except he still didn’t feel guilty - he just felt used. Like Karla knew he would just end up being a mindless drone and not consider the consequences. It wasn’t like he planned to start anything with Maria - it just happened. She knew exactly how to push him and they only spoke once for five whole minutes. What a manipulative bitch.
And she played him right into that courtroom, where he could potentially get thrown in jail for perjury. Not for being Hydra. Goddamn. Since he had already given so much information to the federal government, it was no use to try and bring up her name. She had great motives, but it was way too late in the game.
“Mr. Ward, please answer the question.”
He completely spaced out, but he snapped back to reality quickly. “Sorry, what was the question?”
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