Stef Adams Foster

Mother, wife, detective, goofball

[mrslenaadamsfoster]

Autumn Dreams || Lena & Stef

[mrsstefadamsfoster]

mrslenaadamsfoster‌:

~

Lena pursed her lips, eyes narrowing a bit while Stef laughed at her. Then, when she had her revelation, Lena’s purse pulled back and she pressed her lips into a line. “I guess so,” she agreed with a slow nod. Her eyebrows lifted thoughtfully as she wondered how their first few years together would have been different had it been childless. Would they have done more traditional dating? Would things have moved faster? Slower? What would it have been like moving in together without a kid in the mix? Would they have bought this house if they hadn’t already had a family? Of course, she loved their life and their perfect family but it was fun to imagine, anyway. For a moment, she closed her eyes and put herself back fifteen years. She imagined being in the house, new and unfamiliar, just her and Stef. It had been a particularly cold fall when they’d moved in - all the leaves had seemed to drop off the trees over night and they’d spent hours one weekend trying to rake them all up while Brandon ran around, jumping into their neat piles and undoing all their work. Lena’s eyes popped open as a smile tugged at her mouth at the spark of an idea. “Let’s rake the leaves,” she suggested, sitting forward and reaching for Stef’s arm - her eyes bright with excitement. 

Stef watched her wife as she sat in silence, enjoying the dreamy look on her face and wondering what she was thinking. She was almost starting to zone out herself at the peaceful expression on Lena’s face when suddenly she grabbed her by the arm and spoke. It took a second for her words to land, and then Stef almost laughed again, but caught herself when she saw how happy Lena looked. “Uh, honey, there’s not really any--” She shook her head, biting her bottom lip briefly. She could never resist the opportunity to bring Lena joy, even if it was something small or minor or, in this case, completely ridiculous. “Okay, my love.” Placing her hand over the top of Lena’s, she gave it a squeeze. “You want to get the rakes?” 

When Lena stood up to walk to the garden shed, she let out a small snort, looking around at the barren yard. It was mostly grass, with about ten leaves sprinkled over the entire lawn. She didn’t what Lena thought they were going to rake, but she was willing to indulge her.

[mrslenaadamsfoster]

Autumn Dreams || Lena & Stef

[mrsstefadamsfoster]

mrslenaadamsfoster‌:

~

“No.” Lena gave a sharp shake of her head, putting a full stop to the idea - however playfully it had been suggested. She did not want to foster again. Not right now, anyway. Maybe in a few years it would be something they could look into again but for now, she wanted to enjoy their new found freedom. The problem was… “What did we even used to do without a house full of kids?” Lena finally asked, the look on her face bordering on pitiful as she slumped back in her chair.

Stef couldn’t help herself. She let out another laugh, rolling her eyes at her wife’s ridiculous behavior. After a moment, though, she sobered, realizing with a start that she didn’t have an answer to her wife’s question. “You know,” she said thoughtfully, “we’ve really never had one before. Even before the twins came, when B was little, he needed us so much more. Josie wants to spend time with us once a month or less. So... There’s a first time for everything?”

[mrslenaadamsfoster]

Autumn Dreams || Lena & Stef

[mrsstefadamsfoster]

mrslenaadamsfoster‌:

~

“Mhmm.” Lena pressed her lips into a line, not quite smiling. She looked from Stef, down into her coffee, and back up in the direction of the sun. Taking a sip from her mug, she could feel her own tension in the silence and could see the unconvinced look on her wife’s face without even needing to look at her. Heaving a sigh heavier than she’d expected herself, Lena set her coffee cup down on the table and looked over at her wife. “Maybe it’s a little too quiet,” she admitted with a shrug of one shoulder.

Stef grinned and gave a soft, barking laugh. “And you’re the one who told me how great it was going to be when the kids had gone off to school!” She rolled her eyes but gave Lena’s hand another squeeze of understanding. “We could renew our foster license,” she suggested facetiously.

[mrslenaadamsfoster]

Autumn Dreams || Lena & Stef

Lena trudged downstairs, feeling a hint of melancholy nagging at her. It had been there all morning, just beneath the surface as she went about her day. It was just after noon and she had already completed her To-Do list for the weekend. There wasn’t nearly as much on it these days. With only three people living in the house now, there wasn’t as much mess to clean - fewer dishes to wash, so little laundry she wasn’t even doing a load a day anymore, less clutter laying around. It should have been nice but after so many years of keeping up with the house and juggling everyone’s schedules, Lena wasn’t used to the downtime, or the quiet, and she didn’t quite know what to do with herself. 

In the kitchen, she could see her wife sitting outside at the patio table, feet kicked up on the chair across from her, head tipped back, eyes closed. With a hint of a smile at the sight, Lena poured two cups of coffee and headed out back. 

With light footsteps, she crossed to the table and set Stef’s blue mug down and took the seat next to her wife. She ran her fingertips feather-light down Stef’s forearm before giving her wrist a gentle squeeze. “Enjoying the quiet?” she asked as she leaned back in her own chair, eyes squinting against the sun.

[mrsstefadamsfoster]

Stef was soaking in the sunshine in a manner more fitting to her cold-blooded wife than her self. Stef was normally all about moving, not one to stop and smell the roses, so to speak. But on this late fall morning, with nothing to pressure her, she was enjoying the break from obligations and activity. She hadn’t even brought a book or the newspaper out on the patio with her, genuinely planning to just nap in the sun.

She heard the creak of the door, then soft footsteps, the thunk of a dish on the table, and a chair scraping as it was pulled out. She could smell the rich coffee wafting up from the mug that had presumably just been set before her. And she knew before she felt her soft hand that it was her wife sitting beside her, knew from the rhythm of her walk and scent in the air. She flipped her arm over to catch Lena’s hand in hers, squeezing in return. 

“It’s glorious,” she replied, smiling without opening her eyes. “You?” Here she sat up, put her feet down, and looked at Lena, tipping her head quizzically to the side as she waited for an answer.

[mrslenaadamsfoster]

A Romantic Evening || Lena & Stef

[mrsstefadamsfoster]

mrslenaadamsfoster‌:

~

Stef’s need was growing more urgent. Lena could feel it in the firmness of her grasping fingers. She could hear it in the little moans that escaped whenever Lena found a new place for her lips or fingers to play. It was most obvious in the way her hips continued rocking, unassisted now, down against her own. Using the hair gripped between her fingers, Lena urged Stef’s face back to hers, capturing her lips at the same time as she bent one leg, anchoring her heel against the bed. Stef reacted immediately, arching her back until she was flat against Lena’s thigh. Lena could feel her wife’s satisfied smile curl against her lips as she began grinding back against her. They continued to kiss and Lena drank in every moan and hum, running her fingernails along the length of Stef’s back, gripping her thighs and ribs and shoulders, while Stef kept her own pace. When she was close, Lena slipped her hand down between them, sliding two fingers into her and pressing the heel of her hand against just the right spot. Stef shuddered and broke from Lena’s lips to drop her head down into the crook of her shoulder. Her heavy breaths turned to muffled, shaky moans as she rode into oblivion. Stef’s whole body tensed then went limp as she collapsed down on top of Lena, who was more than happy to be exactly where she was.

Stef inhaled slowly, basking in the sweet strawberry scent of Lena’s skin. She pressed a few soft kisses onto her shoulder before rolling off of her and guiding their lips back together. It wasn’t that everything that had happened between them had fallen away -- it was better than that. Everything was still there, a heavy reminder, if she thought too closely, of how she close she had come to losing her family. But here they were, on the other side of it all. Moving forward not because of but also not in spite of what had happened. Together. Choosing each other. Until the very end. 

It was with these sappy, saccharine thoughts that Stef continued to kiss her beloved, smoothing her tangled hair and drawing in the feeling of her, together as they were. “I love you so much,” she murmured, resting their foreheads together and placing her hand on the side of Lena’s neck. She could feel her pulse beating steadily and couldn’t resist the urge to give that spot a gentle kiss. “Thank you for loving me.”

[mrslenaadamsfoster]

A Romantic Evening || Lena & Stef

[mrsstefadamsfoster]

mrslenaadamsfoster‌:

~

Lena’s only response was a lazy, content smile. Not ready to let it go yet, she lingered in the moment. Lying on her back, her eyes were closed and her heavy limbs splayed about while she felt her skin buzz and her heart beating against her ribs. She exhaled somewhere between a sigh and a moan and as her body began to feel a little less leaden, her eyes fluttered open. The way Stef looked at her made her stomach tighten. I love you. I love you. I love you. She heard it in her head like the tolling of a church bell, neither her voice nor Stef’s alone but instead, both of them chiming together, mingling within the overtones. Reaching over, Lena ran her thumb across Stef’s lips. Her dark eyes were locked on her wife’s as something passed between them that she had felt a thousand times but that always felt surreal, almost magical in its intensity. It was the inevitability of her, of them, and the way Lena could feel her. Not just in her body or her heart, but in her soul.

Stef kissed her thumb as it tugged at her lower lip and Lena, with her fingers beneath her chin, slowly guided her closer until their lips met. The kiss was slow - aching and tender while the fingers of Lena’s other hand slid around to the back of Stef’s neck. As it deepened, the tenderness remained, intensifying their want for each other until a desperation began to seep in. Lena rolled onto her back, pulling Stef with her. She tugged Stef’s shirt over her head before kissing her way down her neck, over her shoulder and along her collar bone. Her hand glided down her back to grip Stef’s hip, encouraging the way she rocked down against her. The other cupped her breast as her lips continued down to kiss the supple flesh above her bra.

Stef had intended for the quiet moment to last longer than it had, but now that Lena was urging her on, she wasn’t about to stop. Biting her own lip to keep herself from crying out, she bent her head back as she pressed herself closer to her love, all thoughts flying from her mind as Lena touched her. It didn’t take long before the remaining clothes had been shed, not just hers but Lena’s too, though it was a little late for that to matter. She wanted to feel all of her, every single exquisite inch, from her lips to her hands to the softness of her thighs and the heat between them. 

As her bra slipped down her arms and she shifted to remove its straps, she was reminded, as always when she got naked these days, of the trauma her body had endured. The scars it bore as a testament to its strength. These scars, which Lena had always worshipped and loved, because they were what kept them together. The flash of insecurity about her body vanished before it even fully arrived, because Lena was pulling her back down, sucking on her neck and immediately winding her fingers back into her hair, reminding her that there was only one thing that mattered in this moment: them.

[mrslenaadamsfoster]

A Romantic Evening || Lena & Stef

[mrsstefadamsfoster]

mrslenaadamsfoster‌:

~

There was something so provocative about being so wanted by someone that they couldn’t even bother with getting undressed. They had to have you. Now. And even though Lena wasn’t capable of conscious thought, some part of her understood that this time was different from the times they were grabbing a quick moment and getting fully undressed was a waste of precious time. This time was about the way Stef wanted her and it seemed every part of Lena’s body was aware of it. With every passing second, as her wife’s fingers drew her closer to the edge, Lena’s body felt another reminder. Her own skirt cascading around her hips where it had landed after being pushed up to allow access between her legs. Stef’s jeans, sturdy and rough against her inner thigh, never letting her forget her presence there. The cool metal of her belt buckle occasionally sending a chill through her that was no match for the heat that was burning her up. Stef’s t-shirt, hitched up around her ribs, rubbing against Lena’s bare skin. It was all a feast of sensations that sent her hurtling over the edge, gasping and clinging to her lover while her body went from feeling everything to nothing and back again.

As Lena’s breathing deepened and slowed, Stef suddenly realized how ridiculous she had just been. She was still fully dressed, pinning Lena to the bed, kissing her as she came down from her orgasm. Their children were downstairs. They were still in the process of repairing their relationship after weeks on end of tension and fighting. And yet at that moment, there had been nothing she could do but make love to her wife. And while her own pulsing need was still strong in her core, she also felt able to stop for a minute, making sure Lena had felt her urgency as want rather than lack of caring. 

She rolled off of Lena, sliding her hand across her stomach and pushing her skirt back down over her now stretched and damp underwear. “You’re beautiful,” she murmured, in awe of the glowing woman before her. “I love you.”

[mrslenaadamsfoster]

A Romantic Evening || Lena & Stef

[mrsstefadamsfoster]

mrslenaadamsfoster‌:

~

Stef’s mouth was warm and wet. Her breath washing over Lena’s skin made her shudder and her fingernails scratching along Stef’s scalp dug just a little deeper, holding on a little tighter. She had been sure she wanted to take the time to savor the moment but Stef taking over made her realize that what she’d really been wanting the whole evening was to be taken - a prize claimed by the woman who had won her so long ago. Lena’s abs twitched as Stef’s mouth moved down, dancing attention over them. When she felt the scrape of teeth just below her belly button, she was unable to contain a moan - clamping down on her lower lip as her hips thrust forward in response. Anticipation made her skin buzz like a low electric current as she waited for Stef’s next move, leaving herself totally at her wife’s mercy. If she wanted to lead this encounter, Lena was more than happy to go along for the ride.

Stef spread kisses across Lena’s stomach and hips, letting her hands trail behind her mouth as she moved down her lover’s body. After a quick caress through her thick, damp curls, she stood up fluidly, taking Lena’s hand. “Come here,” she murmured, pulling Lena over to their bed and guiding her down onto it. As Lena laid back against the pillows, she pulled Stef with her, and they kissed hungrily once more, now with the delicious weight of Stef’s body atop hers. All Stef could think about was the strawberry taste of her lips and then, as she slid her hand in between them, the slick smoothness of her labia as Stef began to explore the territory she knew so well.

[mrslenaadamsfoster]

A Romantic Evening || Lena & Stef

[mrsstefadamsfoster]

mrslenaadamsfoster‌:

~

With her fingertips tracing the outline of her bra, Stef had to be able to feel the way Lena’s heart raced in her chest beneath her hands. She was sure of it. Her body anticipated every touch, craving more with each passing second. There was a fiery trail left in Stef’s wake. Every bit of skin she had touched was left burning white hot and Lena was sure she was going to burst into flames. It would have been easy to give into the need pulsing through her, that she was sure was pulsing through Stef, too. They’d been waiting all evening, after all. But, much as she would have really enjoyed the frenzied passion, she decided she still wasn’t done milking everything she could out of this evening. She brought her hand up to the side of Stef’s neck as they kissed, sliding it down to rest over the hollow at the base. The slightest bit of pressure held Stef at bay, keeping her from counteracting as Lena pulled back on their kiss until it was slow and achingly soft.

Stef let herself be held off for a moment before she growled and pushed through Lena’s gentle grip, claiming her lips in a kiss that was suddenly fierce and bruising. She was tired of waiting; there would be plenty of time for chaste kissing later. Divesting Lena of her bra, she bent down and kissed first one dark nipple and then the other. While her own breasts were no longer... ideal, enough time had passed now that she didn’t care. She thought she would have been much more upset to lose Lena’s, and she worshipped them now to ensure her lover knew just how much she appreciated her beautiful body. Lena’s fingers were twisted in her short hair, nails scratching lightly against her scalp, driving Stef on, possibly unintentionally. 

[mrslenaadamsfoster]

A Romantic Evening || Lena & Stef

[mrsstefadamsfoster]

mrslenaadamsfoster‌:

~

With her back against the door, she had nowhere to go but she really didn’t mind. There wasn’t anywhere else she wanted to be. The feeling of Stef pressed along the length of her body was divine and her cool fingers tracing down Lena’s spine left a delicious tingle in their wake. Her own hands were busy, too. One hand gripped Stef’s shoulder, so solid beneath her grasping fingers that gave away the strength of her desire. The other slid down around her hip to cup the underside of her ass, appreciating the ample curve as she pulled her wife in harder against her.

Lena’s grasp urged Stef on, and she trailed her way down her neck, kissing and sucking, hard enough to be felt but not enough to leave a mark. They may have been making out like horny teenagers, but she was still conscious of their own children and their eagle eyes. Scraping her teeth across Lena’s carotid, she felt the steady hum of her pulse through her lips, and couldn’t suppress the rush of love she felt for her partner. She paused for just a minute, taking in the glory of Lena, before tugging at the bottom of her shirt. Her wife’s smirk made a different kind of jolt rush through her as she pulled at the blouse, momentarily stymied by the presence of buttons. She quickly figured it out and removed the shirt, laying both her hands on Lena’s warm bare stomach. She dipped her head to kiss her sternum, and then moved back to her lips as her hands trailed up around the edges of the dark bra.

[mrslenaadamsfoster]

A Romantic Evening || Lena & Stef

[mrsstefadamsfoster]

mrslenaadamsfoster‌:

~

Lena’s cheeks grew warm as she met Stef’s eye. Beneath the glimmer of mischief was a desire that Lena knew. Very well. She pulled her lower lip between her teeth, biting back a smile as she let Stef lead her up the stairs. When they reached their room, Lena closed the door and flipped the lock before turning back toward her wife. Her eyes did a slow sweep over her, taking in the gorgeous sight. Her cropped blonde hair that was just long enough for Lena to get her fingers into. Her broad, sturdy shoulders that could carry the weight of the world. Her muscular forearms and strong hands. God, those hands. Then there was her body. Athletic and perfect. She was just wearing jeans and a t-shirt but that was when Stef was at her best. Anything more fussy just detracted from her simple confidence. And that was what Lena found most attractive about her. But her ass was a close second. “Come here,” she commanded but she was sure she couldn’t wait another second so she hooked her fingers in the waist of her jeans and pulled Stef to her, leaning back against the door as they came together. “I’d like to sample the menu,” she said before capturing Stef’s lips.

Stef let Lena admire her, using the opportunity to admire right back. Her thin, sexy legs, strong arms, and that lip bitten grin that just made Stef go wild. And that voice, oh that voice, the loving firmness with which Lena directed her... If she had devoted any time at all to think concrete thoughts in that moment, she might have mused about the balance of power between them, the way other people saw her as all toughness and brute force and the way Lena totally and completely commanded her with just a word. But Stef wasn’t thinking. She was too busy kissing, kissing and running her hands up Lena’s smooth back, tracing the bumps of her spine as she went. She was busy letting all of her senses take in the incredible woman before her, just feeling, just doing. No thinking required. 

[mrslenaadamsfoster]

A Romantic Evening || Lena & Stef

[mrsstefadamsfoster]

mrslenaadamsfoster‌:

~

A pleasant heat spread through her and she no longer cared about the nipping coolness of the ocean air. There was plenty of warmth right here in Stef’s arms. With the fingers of one hand buried in her wife’s hair, Lena let her sandals fall to the sand so her other hand could slip beneath the hem of Stef’s shirt. She let it roam her back, her fingertips gliding along her skin until they settled on her hip, pulling her in closer. Stef’s lips began to wander down to her jaw, drawing out a quiet moan of appreciation as Lena lifted her chin. Her whole body tingled and when Stef nipped at her shoulder, Lena smiled and dug her fingernails into her hip. She slid her hand down to cup Stef’s jaw, drawing her back up and kissing her deeply before pulling away. With hooded eyes and pouting lips that seemed to reach for her as she spoke, Lena captured Stef’s eyes and whispered, “Take me home, Stef.”

One perk of having teenagers was their self-sufficiency. By the time Stef and Lena were pushing open their front door, three kids had retreated to the quiet of their rooms and Brandon was in the living room playing piano with intense focus. He didn’t even turn around when they walked in. Nonetheless, Stef still called out to let him know they were home and heading upstairs. “‘Kay,” he replied, still facing away from them. Stef gave a fond smile at his studious back and then immediately turned back to her wife, who had taken back her hand in order to remove her shoes and put them neatly on the rug. They joined hands again and Stef planted a firm kiss on Lena’s cheek before whispering, “I can’t wait to have my dessert.”

[mrslenaadamsfoster]

A Romantic Evening || Lena & Stef

[mrsstefadamsfoster]

mrslenaadamsfoster‌:

~

Lena tucked her chin as she smiled, her eyes dropping down toward the sand for a moment. “We’ve done some really great things at Anchor Beach. I think the rest of the district could really benefit from some of the changes we’ve made in the last few years.” She glanced at Stef before shrugging and looking forward along the beach spread ahead of them. “You’re sure you’re okay with that idea?” Lena slowed, urging Stef to stop and face her. “I think it’s important that we have our own dreams and goals but this,” she ran her free hand down Stef’s arm and took hold of her wrist while Lena’s eyes drifted up to meet hers, “will always be most important.”

Stef twisted her hand to grab Lena’s and squeezed. “Of course I am, love.” She gave a smile almost soppy from the sweetness. “I want you to have everything you want. And you would be amazing at it.” She winked and then leaned in for a kiss. They kissed slowly, just a peck at first, then building, moving closer, pulling each other in. Stef wrapped one arm around Lena’s waist to hold her and gave a little gasp as Lena’s fingers tugged on her hair, weaving their way in as always. The evening had been so wonderful, a meandering stroll filled with loving silence and meaningful conversation. Stef felt, for the first time in a long time, like they were the only two people in the world. And she wasn’t at all eager to end that feeling by returning home, no matter how much the breeze picked up.

[mrslenaadamsfoster]

A Romantic Evening || Lena & Stef

[mrsstefadamsfoster]

mrslenaadamsfoster‌:

~

A moment of silence passed before Lena shrugged answered honestly. “I don’t know.” As they continued to walk, she could feel Stef’s eyes on her and heat rose to her face. That wasn’t fair, even if it was honest. She didn’t know because she hadn’t given any real thought to her own hopes and dreams beyond their family in a long time. When had she had the time? But Stef had given her a real answer, a vulnerable and open one, and she deserved that in return. “Actually, there is something.” She hadn’t given this enough thought to feel like she should even voice it. She wasn’t even sure if it was something she truly wanted or if it just felt exciting because it was so different from what she’d been doing for so long. “I’ve thought about running for the district school board. Not until all the kids are out of high school,” she was quick to add. “It’s not a paid position so I would have to keep working. But someone at work mentioned that they thought I would be a good fit and even though I never really gave it any serious thought, it’s been in the back of my mind.” She shrugged again, feeling the flutter of nerves in her belly at having actually spoken it out loud.

Stef waited patiently, but her gaze didn’t waiver from her wife’s face as she did. She could see Lena thinking, could imagine her having the same blank Stef herself had felt when first asked to think of dreams for just herself alone. And when Lena answered, she gave that her full attention too. “That sounds like a perfect fit for you, love.” She gave Lena’s hand a squeeze and winked at her when they made eye contact. “Give you more of a chance to really get into the policy making part of administration, hmm?”

[mrslenaadamsfoster]

A Romantic Evening || Lena & Stef

[mrsstefadamsfoster]

mrslenaadamsfoster‌:

~

Picking up on Stef’s hesitation and her retreat away from the topic, Lena smiled into the dark and squeezed Stef’s hand. “Well, I think it’s a good thought,” she said, nudging her shoulder against her wife’s but letting the subject go. She wasn’t sure what was bothering Stef about the subject but she wasn’t willing to do anything to ruin the evening so it was something they’d have to come back to. This obviously wasn’t the time. The sky was dark and the wind off the water was bordering on cold. After another lengthened silence, Lena felt goosebumps raise on her arms and a chill run down her spine. Determined not to let it intrude on the moment, she tugged her cardigan tighter around her chest and leaned in a little closer, hoping the warmth along her arm would spread.

Stef felt Lena nestling closer and happily wrapped her arm around her wife’s shoulders. “You want to head back?” she asked, but Lena shook her head, and she was glad. Despite the chill, it was so peaceful out here, and she wasn’t ready to end the stroll. They moseyed a little further up the beach, straying away from the shoreline and into the cover of the trees, which rustled comfortingly in the wind and blocked the breeze a bit. “What about you? What do you want for yourself?” She turned to look at Lena’s regal profile, one corner of her mouth lifting automatically at the sight. She knew that whatever Lena said, she would throw her whole self into giving it to her. She would lasso the moon for this woman.

[mrslenaadamsfoster]

A Romantic Evening || Lena & Stef

[mrsstefadamsfoster]

mrslenaadamsfoster‌:

~

“Do you want to advance further?” This was yet another bit of information that took Lena by surprise. Stef had never mentioned any interest in moving up beyond a detective and Lena was pretty sure that had really only happened because they’d needed the money - as much as Stef swore it wasn’t. Stef loved the beat, loved the action, and what little Lena knew about law enforcement positions, the higher the ranking, the less action. Which didn’t bother Lena but it didn’t really sound like Stef. “You know, there are lots of degrees that would probably help you advance if you wanted to study something else. All of your years on the job probably mean more than a degree at this point anyway. Psychology or communications. Even something like social work would be something you could major in and still use it to your advantage at work. If you wanted to. I just… I think you probably a lot more options without having to switch careers.”

Stef gave her head a quick shake, almost scoffing. “No, I don’t want to move up. But you know. If we move or something. I don’t know. Seems like it’d be good to be prepared.” She gave a quick smile, squeezing Lena’s hand. “I guess I haven’t thought much about the details,” she admitted. “It’s just a pipe dream.” She felt silly having said it out loud and now having to face the zillions of practicalities that she honestly had barely even considered. Going to college had never seemed realistic, so she hadn’t bothered to imagine the details. And Stef wasn’t exactly a big classroom learner. Part of what she’d loved about the police academy was how practical it was, how much of the learning was done with your own two hands. She liked how the job was something that got into your whole body, not just your head. So maybe college wasn’t the right thing for her. She worried her bottom lip between her teeth as she thought harder on it. “Really, it’s not like a plan or anything. Just a thought.”

[mrslenaadamsfoster]

A Romantic Evening || Lena & Stef

[mrsstefadamsfoster]

mrslenaadamsfoster‌:

~

“Really?” Lena glanced at her wife with a look of delighted surprise. Of all the things Stef might have said, this wasn’t one she could have ever expected. “Honey, I think that’s wonderful!” She squeezed Stef’s hand again and smiled at her self-consciousness. Stef’s insecurities about her education had never been a secret. It had been at the root of more than a few fights over the years. But as much as it bothered her wife that they were unequal in their educations, she hadn’t ever made any mention of wanting to go back to school. If she had, Lena would have been on board immediately and they would have found a way to make it work. “What would you want to study?”

Lena’s joy made Stef feel simultaneously bolder and more uncomfortable. On the one hand, she had always known Lena would support her in this little dream. On the other, the self-hating parts of her brain had pre-interpreted Lena’s response as confirmation that she had never truly loved Stef as she was, despite all evidence to the contrary. That little niggling voice said, “See? She can’t wait. Finally, she won’t have to be ashamed of her stupid wife who didn’t even go to college.” But she did her best to shut those thoughts down, since the inquisitive happiness Lena was showing was loving and genuine, and she wasn’t about to let her insecurities ruin this moment. “Law enforcement, I suppose,” she answered, shrugging one shoulder. “Or criminal justice or whatever they call it. I’m not looking to switch careers or anything. I love my job. I just... I don’t know. Most of the other detectives have degrees. Even a lot of the rookies nowadays have an associate’s or a bachelor’s. I know I got my promotion because I deserved it or whatever, but it would be nice to have a litle more evidence to back that up. Especially if I ever want to advance any further, or move to another department or another precinct or anything.”