i dream of you now, when the world burns past noon,
while i wander undone in the life that we live.
the rut that i circle, the stone i pursue –
all loosens its weight when i think how you give.
i dream of you wrapped in the gloom of my hours,
in nights that console me, in days violently bright.
i dream when all language is lost to its powers,
when love outpaces thought, leaving only its light.
we could be stranded on an island,
feet burning over merciless sand,
i'd search for you still through the salt of the seas,
call your name into wind with my mouth full of land,
buried deep under guilt and what clings to my knees.
i would shoulder the pain, bear the heft of my flaws,
the slow ache of pretending and the lies i defend –
and still, i would stand,
and still, without pause,
with the world on my back, i would never bend.
as long as you're there, i will love you outright.
as long as i love you, i'll harden to strong.
and as long as i'm strong, i will carry you tight,
like duty held quiet, insistent and lifelong.
you opened your mind, let me enter your heart,
those trembling rooms i had never been shown.
you wrapped me in warmth like a merciful art,
a hunger that secretly lived in my bones.
i never believed i would choose to remain,
so careful, so secret, so slow in my stay,
until all tomorrows began to explain
why leaving your warmth felt like losing the day.
and i dream of you,
i dream of you always,
beneath stage-lighted breath, in the tempo we share.
lips reverent, halted, always inches apart,
discipline taught where desire would tear,
touch rehearsed into nothing, then sealed in the heart.
to love you is wanting what i cannot claim,
and choosing you still in the ways left unsaid;
in glances, in pauses, in carrying flame
where silence is louder than words that we dread.
i dream of a girl from a small, distant land
under fluorescent lights, conquering the world,
learning that Earth fits the span of her hand,
learning her name has the weight of a soul.
and i love her while knowing my place is the edge,
the side of the dream where i walk but can't stand.
i would wander this conquered world at your side,
fight for your love, labor hard for our gleam,
for as long as the gods will allow us the pride
of believing in something as fragile as dreams.
but dreams are not merciful –
they loosen, they slip.
they fade from the body, the mouth, and the hand.
and when dream turns to memory,
when morning insists,
