I have only ever been in love with two people in my life. Lauren and Benjamin.
It amazes me that after so many years, Ben and I have found our way back to each other.
I still feel bad about some of those things I said to him when we broke up November 2009 after over a year together. I still remember that he was drunk every night that week and how it hurt that it felt as thought he couldn’t be sober to be with me. Like he had to be drunk.
Then 2010 ended up being the year I got back together with Lauren.
2011 mine and Ben’s bands toured together for a bit and I was so so proud of him for getting sober. And because I was still in love with him, I cheated on my girlfriend. It was over a week of magic with him. I hated breaking his heart when I found out Lauren was pregnant.
I spent 10 years loving her. And in those 10 years, I also missed Ben.
10 years without him and now he’s here. More than 10 years with her and now she’s gone.
Love lost; love found. Love lost; love found.