🥀 @mxsxciii - Tumblr Blog

mangacartaholygrail

*refuses to look at texts* I love conversation and communication

ahahah I just read my last post at 39 weeks, I ended up going to 40 weeks and 4 days, and LEMME JUS TELL YOU, childbirth is the WORST pain you will ever feel. Being 100 percent honest I’ve been through some rough shit but 24 hours of labor makes anything I’ve ever thought was “hard” look like nothing, and maybe it was nothing and I’d just never experienced true pain. Also, NO ONE tells you a lot of things about what your body goes through postpartum, most likely because it’s disgusting and no one wants to talk about tears and stitches and hemmoroids, etc. At least now (one month and a week later) I’m finally healed and also I have a baby girl that I love dearly. So yes it is definitely worth the pain but when you’re in the midst of it you truly feel like you’re going to actually die.

What eyeshadow do you use? It's adorable

Usually the modern renaissance palette 🎨 ty

pregnancy update

I’m 38 almost 39 weeks, and I feel like people lie about how desperate you get to make labor happen when you’re this far along. First my OB tells me, “oh start having sex so your cervix softens” from cum or whatever, and I do that: no progress. Then at the next check up (the worst OB check up I’ve had this entire pregnancy) I was so ready to hear “you’re going to have a baby in the next week.” or better yet, “you’re going to have a baby right now, lets go, start pushing”; but no of course I hear “I can’t even get to your cervix its too far back, so you aren’t having a baby this week.” then she told me she’s going on Thanksgiving vacation for the next two weeks (until the 30th), and if anything happens WHICH IT SHOULD: to go to L&D and this other doctor will deliver my baby. Which is totally fine, I honestly don’t give a s h i t who delivers my child as long as they’re qualified.

So I feel like when you get to be 39 weeks, the idea of being pregnant another week, another day is unbearable. Anyone who is a mom may understand this, but if you’re not sorry if it sounds petty and ridiculous but you have no idea how uncomfortable this is. At this point I’d do anything to go into labor, I’m about to go buy a damn exercise ball and bounce on that for hours and hours.

On the more positive side, I am so incredibly ready to meet Iyla. I think I’ve been in “nesting” mode for like 2 weeks now. I just finished my final amazon order for the rest of her things (which aren’t even necessities at this point, just me being extra). Her crib is together, bedding is here, everything is wonderful and ready for her. That is mainly why I’m becoming so damn impatient. I wish I could explain how uncomfortable your body begins to feel, it’s like being in someone else’s body for 9 months which is almost a year, and then at the end AWFUL. Everything hurts, you’re exhausted, you feel so unattractive, the list goes on.

PLEASE come soon Iyla, I love you and I am so ready to meet you. <3

#38 week update