Mya @myaboo18 - Tumblr Blog

new cycle

too it been a lot of time since I sat typed on this page and a lot has happened I think I was dealing with Kirk the last time I was on here and that was a couple year ago and lets just say Ive gone independent . Ive moved from New Mexico and finally moved to Las Vegas Nevada and I'm loving it so far and I've met someone that means the whole world to me and his name is Rhandel and ofcoasre I've gonna thought a lot I slapped my sister and got the cops called and then ive got my heart broken a lil hear and there !the one thing that has been very grateful is my baby and we've been dating since 3/22/24 and that's been a hot mixture I will say he is much better then a lot of my past reltonships in my past but I will say we do have our day but he does a lot for me and I can't thank him enough ! I did start working at another smiths and I will say it more toxic and I honestly hate it more then New Mexico but hey more pay and better environment and I'm more happier but I do feel bad I left my dad by hims and with my animals and I do tell him to get rid of them but he will never listen to me! I will say over all Vegas has been the best choice in my life and I hope can keep that to my word ! love mya that is 26 and living her best life she can and doing the best I can't and I'm so proud of you very much !

#Spotify

feelingsoftheday

If u need me, I’m always here

I fell for him and he doesn’t even know it but I have to keep my distance or I’ll even get more hurt ! I’m crying at the hotel on the balcony wondering if he is gonna come out but he isn’t all day he’s been texting Anita and I know we are just friends but friends don’t fuck that’s how I get attached and I hate myself for that I really do ! I wish I never had feeling at all ! I fell for him in April and now it’s Nov 1st wondering what I did wrong !!! Why do I do this to myself!!!!! Our plane leave today and I’ll probably never see him again and honestly this really hurts my heart it feels like a break up but it was never a thing ! If only I listened to my friends from the get go to not get hurt maybe I wouldn’t be crying ! Life hates me I know it does all I want is to be loved properly and cared for that’s all I want in life but I can’t even get treated right when I treat someone right ! I hate that I’m jealous and it’s a toxic trait that I have even when something isn’t mine I still want it to be mine . It’s currently 2:20am in Las Vegas and the end of my trip is depressing honestly and I hate myself sooooo much I self sabotage everything I really need to stop it ! Maybe everyone is right I’m gonna be alone forever because I’m too picky or I choose the wrong men . I’m gonna try to go to bed and not think about what’s going thought my head . I never told him how I felt but only by expressing myself with buy him things and that never works ever I’m soopooo stupiddddd

I am depressed I don’t know what I’m doing wrong with my life ! I think I’m over sensitive or some shit I know life will work it’s self out one way or another! Just stay happy mya I promise everything is gonna be okay ! No matter how many time someone uses one day someone will care about you so much that you will loved forever !!!! Quite looking for so much in people until they say something to you first just remember you got this gosh dang it

thoughtkick

“You can’t cling to the past. Because no matter how tight you hold on… it’s already gone.”

— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother

I miss my high school sweetheart he was the only person that actually cared for me no matter what happened I know we make mistakes and we where so young !!! I know he probably doesn’t even think the same way I do but I know I care for him more then I thought it’s been very hard to move on when you had someone that reallyyy truly cared for you because that’s so hard to find these day . Life has gotten harder with relationships and friendships and family but one thing I do keep going is my happiness when it get hard that’s something that I struggled with unfortunately. I use to self sabotage everything I would play victim sometimes and it wasn’t healthy honestly I look back and think man I was stupiddd lol but hey that’s how we learn:) out of all my ex I miss satoshi the most we had our differences but one thing he did was take care of me with my mental issues that’s something that I will carry in my heart forever !!

alleyha

My breathing

is getting slow

and choking,

Tears overflowed

my eyes,

My body

is shaking,

My blurry eyes

stare at my figure

right in front

of me,

My skin no longer

has the same shade

as before leaving

pale skin,

My eyes are

swollen and red,

My mouth

is only shaking,

Fear and anxiety

are there in me,

The same voice

that freezes my blood

sings endlessly,

'Do it, do it,

you'll feel good

afterwards'

A slight headache

formed dropping

several tears as

my eyes closed

in pain,

letting me

down,

My hands

easily find

their prey,

The sound

of my tense

breaths are

no longer

present

leaving

complete

silence.

-TA

kea9

pawg-papi-deactivated20230808

jungoonights

I would kindly like to say that I've been listening to Taehyung's song since last night and it hit me just now that it's exactly the concept of @stayjimin 's heartwrenchingly beautiful i miss you (sent 2:17 am) from what I imagine Taehyung's pov to be like, and I wanted to share this with the world

jooyeone

Not a day goes by I don’t think about you I’m sorry I’m sooo sorry still for everything! Please get better I see you are not you anymore and that scares me so much you are having a difficult time in life and I can see it and I hope you get better please you use to be so happy just know I believe in you , you got this get that help you need lil rockstar !!! To ~RFQIII