DAY 59 Monday (3 Sept)
In Qui3t time, I got reminded of how much God loves us that He knew us before the world began! I also felt to pray for Sarah which I did!
We started the day differently and started with rehearsal, then band practice, lunch and then lecture. It was by Rod on Lordship!
DAY 60 Tuesday (4 Sept)
Basically over the weekend I had a dream, everyone was there and when someone said a nasty comment and did something that was not bi biblical. They turned into Lego or they perished with a sign of the effect on the floor.
In addition, He gave me 2 verses.
Daniel 3:2 worshipping of golden statue
Then King Nebuchadnezzar sent to gather the satraps, the prefects, and the governors, the counselors, the treasurers, the justices, the magistrates, and all the officials of the provinces to come to the dedication of the image that King Nebuchadnezzar had set up.
Isaiah 2:3 worshipping of God
and many peoples shall come, and say: "Come, let us go up to the mountain of the Lord , to the house of the God of Jacob, that he may teach us his ways and that we may walk in his paths." For out of Zion shall go forth the law, and the word of the Lord from Jerusalem.
And today God gave me revelation on it. He gave me an image of the 3 Pokémon cute figurines I had on the shelf next to my bed and I was holding greater significance in the things I made than the things God made (the beauty of my own hands) and I got people to come admire it. I definitely knew God wanted me to smash them.
He also revealed that I hold finance above Him. He gave me the figure 10,000 but i was not sure for what. He also said He'll anoint me to do even greater things that I'm not ready to hear yet.
It really related to our topic this week - Lordship, that need to give up the right to make our own choices because God is Lord is ALL!
DAY 61 Wednesday (5 Sept)
We had a busy day previously, I slept til 6.30am.. I read Eph again on http://www.stepstudyteach.com/ .
During Lecture, Rod was talking about how Jesus gave everything for us. Jesus was rejected like sometimes we felt, he was a considered a “bastard”, He had gone through so much in life. Rod was explaining that the jewish culture and the asian culture were somewhat similiar and shame was something He would have felt so much shame when he saw his heartbroken mum at the cross. And sometimes in life, we would have to choose God over our family. But still, he said to look after Mary when He was on the cross - family was important to Jesus but He still chose God’s will over family. Honestly that is something I struggle with, putting God above family. Listening to God or listen to family - no doubt my family gives me sound advice and they’re always choosing the best for me but I also recognise that God knows the best above the best because He knew me and my family before the creation of the world. At the end of lecture, we had a time before God and kneeled beside our chairs to pray... I think deep down God might want me to be a missionary and it's not an easy life and I started thinking of how I would be able to provide for myself. Honestly, the struggle is real and all the more, we need to lean on God not our own strength.
I also had one on one with abigail and had a talk with her about what God has been speaking to me even over the weekend. She encouraged me to pray about it.
DAY 62 Thursday (6 Sept)
During Quiet Time, I was doing the Eph series and I learnt about how Jesus includes all. He’s always had time for people even thought He was interrupted while doing things. As I was just waiting for God to speak, Jesus said I love you and sing! I was like sing? Are you sure? Mind you it was 6am in the morning. So I was like ok.. if you want me to. I sang light light light light of the world song hahaha. Then we went for Intercession, we stood in prayer with the japan team who are still in the midst of getting their funds together. They’ve still got a ways to go. David, my team leader was sharing about the Life of Joshua and the walls of Jericho. It seems like the weirdest thing to do but He did it anyway because that was what God was telling them. During Lecture, we were talking about rights and how our only appropriate response is really to say God I give you my choices, they aren’t for me to make anymore, they are Yours. Especially for what He did in us. This was something Rod shared the day before:
If God was a monster, unkind, brutal and completely unmerciful and unloving, you’d be an idiot to not obey everything He said. But the reason we call it good news, it’s because He’s not like that. He’s incredibly merciful, so humble, loving. (He gets involved in our tiny issues and would be trilled we have a chance to obey). If the creator of the world wants to be involved in our lives, be delighted in His input.
Definitely was insightful. I also got my parents to drop off the items to smash. My fam came during rehearsal (This is the greatest show) time but I went to go meet them for a bit! It was nice! :)
DAY 63 Friday (7 Sept)
In the morning, I dreamt that I they had a huge aquarium in the agape house, there was lots of friend. I saw (someone from Manila) in agape house and she was looking at the fish in the long tanks and saying I love my church, so proud of my church. But honestly I was kinda thinking like, but you gave up on God and decided to go on your way. Then I was walking around, one section sold food. Many levels and .. it's like a mini maze, James(Music DTS) was there fixing the sound station. Hahah I don’t know what the dream is about yet. Today was application day and one by one, we brought up things we choose to give to God today. I think i was the 6th or 7th person to go? I told God in front of everyone that today I choose God above family, above finance, above myself. It was really hard and I cried a lot (lol sure that was no surprise). As they were praying for me after, I asked God to fill me with more of Him, His love - cause when you choose to surrender rights, there are empty spaces to fill those “right” slots. We ended around 8pm, everyone was so hungry. Fortunately, Ahreum (formally Kate) and I order some bibimbab from the 4WD, they were having a fundraiser. It was so good. We ate with a couple of girls then they started watching Tangled and I didn’t feel like I should really watch it so I went in and out. Showered and went to bed.
DAY 64 Saturday (8 Sept)
I woke up around 7.30am? God wanted me to go to swan River. I didn’t want to (because it was about an hr before breakfast, I was feeling lazy and it looked like it was gonna rain) but He really wanted me to go so I got ready and went. As I was walking I was singing the song he is the light light light light of the world. All throughout, it was cloudy but you could see the sun was just very bright behind the clouds. When I got to the swan River, I stood and waited. I looked down and suddenly I heard shouts from the river. It was a bunch of people rowing in a boat and the coach shouting directions in a speedboat next to it. (You can see them in the far distance just under the bridge.)
They paused in the middle of the river and I thought they were gonna turn back but the coach was talking to the rowers (there were 2 sets of them). Then they went further down the river. I walked a little further and sat at a bench, then I saw a train and it looked like the Singapore train and God asked me if I would lay down my identity as Singaporean and I said I have but he said not entirely and I said it'll be hard but I'll let it go if You want me to. As I got up from the bench, the sun came out at that same timing and the sky was just suddenly clear and the sun shined so brightly and as I walked up the stairs back on the path back to the base, God said I am the light of the world (I felt the warmth of the sun on my back) and he said just like the coach was with the rowers each step of the way, I am with You. You know what you must do.
I basically freaked out. Ah. I definitely knew God is prompting me for missions but in what capacity I don’t know. I think He was telling me Manila but I was like oh no! Hahha! Definitely need to pray about it more, perhaps ask God if there’s another option.
After that, had breakfast and went to Milk&Honey(Thift Shop- own by YWAM) and bought a pair of Columbia pants for like $3. SO WORTH IT! Also Leonie got to try this outfit hahaha!
We went there again after lunch and Leonie got the pants and Iel got 2 pants. Then we headed to Uniqlo. Spent a good 1hr in there, and bought 2 pants and 2 underwear - was thinking of outreach. Then brought Leonie to try some foods - onigiri and pork floss bun.
I went back to base and a couple of us spent the rest of the day in a meeting room and finished my journal. I did try the pants on and I realised that australia sizing and singapore sizing is different in Uniqlo. It was too long for me :(
DAY 65 Sunday (9 Sept)
I went to church in the morning, they were talking about relationships and how the eyes are really important in communication! Gotta learn to make more eye contact!
After I went back to the city, to Uniqlo to see if I could get pants altered. The manager called Catherine L was really nice and allowed me to get refunds on both my pants because I had brought my version of the pants (an old pair I had). After that, I checked my messages and Jane had sent me a text of the 50% off on Hifumiya today! So I decided to go eat there by myself and low and behold, I met Lydia Lee and Caterine there. We ate there and had a good chat about church life and serving in ministry. It was an interesting conversation - some people don’t feel like FCC is home anymore so that’s pretty surprising. I think we need to be more vulnerable with each other on a cell level and also church level. After that, I wondered into woolsworths to buy some cereal and came back to base. The rest of my DTS had gone to Caversham which was pretty cool!