Nessa🌸 @mydailylore - Tumblr Blog

it's raining over my place, i'm gonna sit in my room and stare out the windows

#digital diary #i feel like a victorian child #pic is not mine it's from pinterest hehe

bro

just found out my new semester starts this monday. i thought it starts on august 3. why tf did my uni make 2 separate schedule like 😭 i'm so out of shape and i'm a little embarrassed of showing myself in public at the moment please

#digital diary #how to get tea body in three days #i've been eating a lot of instant spaghetti and noodles #had one too many glasses of grape fanta

NIGHTMARE

i had a dream about breaking my macbook 😭 i was hanging out in my room with my mom's colleagues for some reason and the whole time i was trying to clean my macbook. it was covered in fingerprints so i went to get a microfiber cloth that's been damped but every time i do and went back to my room to clean it, i would get distracted and the cloth would be dry by the time i remember and i would also accidentally wipe my macbook keyboard with a tissue instead of the cloth. i left my room again and when i came back i couldn't see my macbook or my mom's colleagues. i panicked but then i found out it was hidden under my blanket. mind you when i left the macbook was opened but now it's like halfway closed and when i went to close it the hinge was suprisingly, extremely LOOSE so i was like HUH and it would keep falling off every time i tried to put it up and then i realized it was BROKEN like it has dents EVERYWHERE AND IT WAS BENT so i went to show it to my mom and told her about what happened. it felt like i was blaming her colleagues but hey i know how much i baby my stuff so it's impossible that i was the one who did it and then i dragged my dad to the machines store with me

#girl blogger #digital diary #blog #dreams

my semester result came out today and i passed! i miss my kids so much i wish they were here to celebrate with me 🐹🐹❤️

#girl blogger #digital diary #blog #university #student life #hamster #pets

i miss talking and hanging out with my uncle. i know i could just text him but honestly after not meeting for years i feel like we're becoming strangers again. i avoided meeting him a couple times while visiting my mom's hometown because of family drama but ugh i just want to talk to him and catch up but i also don't want to bother him, he's probably busy

#digital diary #blog #girl blogger #family #family drama #mini rant

man i really wish i'm getting my package today. i can't wait to try my headphone with an adapter converter. my headphone is the wireless kind but it came with the jack wire thing and i can't use it wired on my phone. i really hate how bluetooth headphone/earphone makes other audios sound bad when you're on a call

#digital diary #blog #girl blogger #earphones #bluetooth headphones #mini rant

i've broken up with my ex (whom i refer to as Taobao Shithead when i talk about him to chatgpt) for two years now and eventho i'm not proud of it at all, i think about him almost every day. not think about him as in "i still love this guy and i regret breaking up" NO. that would be disrespectful to my partner eventho he pisses me off from time to time but idk, i've never really been affected that much by my other break ups it was either i don't feel anything from the break up or i feel guilty there is no in between but my break up with taobao shithead was different. after we broke up, i was stuck with feeling disgusted at myself for months. it was honestly an excruciating experience. i tried not to blame myself for not leaving earlier, for turning a blind eye to every questionable things i noticed from him. i was mad at him but i was especially mad at myself for letting it get to that point. my self-esteem was completely gone.

tonight i get reminded of him again and it's starting to really annoy me bc i deserve a mental space where he doesn't exist and i think it's time for me to forget about him. i thought aiming to forget is almost impossible so i've been trying to just make peace with the situation but clearly making peace isn't going to be enough. i need to seriously try my best to forget about him like obviously without lobotomy there's only so much i can forget but i'll try not paying mind every time he pops up in my mind and try not to entertain my thoughts about him.

how exactly do people do breakups tho i'm genuinely curious now

#digital diary #blog #personal #breakup #relationship #girl blogger

is it just me or does anyone feel weird about writing about good things that happened to you in your journal? it's like obviously i like that something good happened to me today but writing it down feels weird, almost fake. personally i find writing about good things jinx me so i tend to vent in my journal so i mostly use my journal to process emotions.

i've had a thought that i could keep my journals even when i'm done with them so my future kids could read it, something to remember their mom by you feel? but then again i don't exactly want my kids to know how i lost my virginity to my ex 💀

#girl blogger #ramblings #journaling #digital diary #personal #thoughts #writing

Sims 2 Machinima

i used to love making videos out of sims 2. i originally wanted to create a machinima but i didn't really have the chance to actually write a proper story back then. i remember having a bunch of missing assignments just to make 20 sec videos. i even crashed out one time bc my laptop got a virus from me attempting to pirate a video editing software 😭

#girl blogger #ramblings #sims 2 #machinima #nostalgia #video editing

My partner is getting a lil too comfortable with me.

we were having a game night with our friends just now and played Among Us. game night was supposed to be fun, i snitched, our friends snitched and we were laughing while accusing one another but he was only annoyed at me. hinting that i was lowkey spoiling the game. it's Among Us dude, chill. the audacity to get annoyed at me when i've been tolerating him most of the time. fym you were annoyed if you want a serious gameplay then go play on expert server tf

#girl blogger #blog #mini rant

changing my username, bye bye ineedmentalhelpondeeznuts, you made me giggle 🫡

#girl blogger #blog #yapping

Girlblog #1

i don't think anyone would pay any mind to this post, i don't have many followers here buttt i'm going to start girlblogging bc i got a macbook and i need to use it for something. i'm on semester break and won't be using it for assignments for a while but i want to keep using it bc i literally begged my mom for it. it's funny bc in the past when i used to be at my lowest i joked to my mom about how a macbook would make me live longer and now i'm struggling to think of ways to use it other than to watch netflix and play any games. i don't find video games as exciting anymore and i'm only playing mobile legends and roblox these days and that is if i have friends to play with otherwise i rarely touch them. i was excited to play stardew valley at first but i honestly can't bring myself to enjoy stardew too. bro it's been like a year and i'm still feeling the burn out, maybe i just don't like it anymore but man i used to lose myself in it for hours and why tf am i talking like tyler catastrophe lmao ew noooo but anyways yeah

OH btw i was a trans man the last time i was here. as much as disappointing this might sound, some years ago i decided to not identify as one bc i feel like i won't truly be accepted by anyone. living in a transphobic and homophobic country is hard especially without any support and i needed to protect myself at all cost and to do that, i'd still need my family and some of my friends. i decided to identify with the gender i was assigned at birth and ironically, i like being a woman now. not trying to spread any propaganda whatsoever but i like who i am now and that's all that matter, people change and so did i. i'm still queer although i decided not to act on it but nevertheless i'm still me and no i am not turning into a homophobic and transphobic.

#girlblogging #ramblings